The Rules In Paradise (Playing By The Rules) (16 page)

             
"No children either. Please stop fretting. This is my problem, not yours." His tone was slightly sharp so I decided to leave it alone for right now.

             
"Do you want to get married?" I figured it was as good a question as any.

             
"In the future, yes. And yourself?"

             
"Yes, I do. I feel like a life changing commitment is extremely important if you want to be with someone. I feel like it's kind of cowardice to not marry someone. It's like you're making yourself a plan B, just in case. If you can commit to exclusivity, and you want nothing other than that person than you need to take that last step to prove it." I didn't think I was that passionate about it until I stopped speaking.

             
"Children?" He asked.

             
"Yes, but not for awhile. There are many things I want to do, but I do want to have children eventually." I imagined he would respond right away, but he didn't. "What about you?"

             
"I'm not sure. I don't believe I'd be a good father. I don't think I will ever reach a point where I am not selfish about my time and my own freewill. A child means you are utterly selfless for at least eighteen years. I don't know that I am willing to give that up." I felt sad listening to him talk about children.

             
"You do not like that answer," he said.

             
"It makes me sad for you."

             
"Again, I do not want your pity. But why are you sad because of that answer?"

             
"Because, anytime things come down to love or loving someone you shy away. You chose money over love. I feel like you have control over money, you can make it do what you want. You can get it naturally, you're good at it. Love isn't guaranteed. That person doesn't have to return it if they don't want. If you enter into a deal with someone, they pay you. If you love someone they don't have to pay you back. They can take it and run. It's the same with kids, you can control so many things right now. You can be here now, you will be gone in a few hours. You don't have anyone to answer to. Like you're scared that a child will keep you from being happy rather than realizing that they could be the thing to make you happy." I felt bad because this was all speculation. I was just trying to piece him together. He just shrugged his shoulders.

             
"I don't know that it's that deep. I am a selfish person Olivia, I know that about myself. I won't try to hide that or not own up. It's just who I am."

             
"Listen, I don't want you to put you on the spot or that I think that this is anything more than it is. I understand that we are just here together and have no idea where it's going to go, but Charlotte gets married in two months. I was wondering if you'd consider going with me?" I shut my eyes tightly, almost embarrassed to have asked him.

             
"She is getting married where you live?" He asked.

             
"Yes, in August, she's getting married the first week."

             
"I'd be honored to come with you," he replied.

             
"Really?" I was surprised. I felt like it was a big deal to ask for him to make a date almost two months in advance.

             
"Absolutely, why are you so surprised?"

             
"Because, I didn't want you to get the wrong idea. I didn't want you to think I was going overboard, making plans so far in advance, like I was too serious about whatever this is."

             
"Are you not serious about whatever this is?" He asked in a tight voice.

             
"I don't know. I don't know what's going to happen." He didn't respond. "I mean we don't know what's going to happen after you leave in a few hours," I said, to clarify my point.

             
"I supposed that's true." His voice was low. I got off his lap and sat cross legged in the sand in front of him.

             
"Why do you sound like that?" I asked.

             
"I  meant it when I said I will not stop looking until I've found you. I will be there knocking on every door in the city until you answer the knock. By the time you get home I want to see you again and I want to try to be with you. If you are not sure that is what you want I ask to know that information now." His face was lined and he was looking at me intensely.

             
"It is what I want, I just didn't want to push you into anything. I didn't want it to seem like I was taking it too seriously. I'm not interested in anything waiting for me back home. I just don't want to scare you away." His face softened slightly and he rubbed my leg.

             
"I don't think you can. I enjoy you and your company far too much. You make me realize what I've missed for many years. You challenge me and I enjoy every moment. It keeps me on my toes, which is good for me and my business." He smiled and checked his watch.

             
"We need to go back to the boat and grab our things. They will be transporting it back to the lot for safe keeping soon." He stood and pulled me up to him. Rather than walking away he wrapped his arms around my waist and gave me a small smile.

             
"I've never met anyone like you, I'm blessed by you," he said and leaned in to kiss me softly. We walked back to the boat.

             
We cleaned up the room, collecting various pieces of clothing. I folded my dress carried my shoes as we walked to the top deck of the boat. The sky was starting to get slightly lighter. Time was flying by when all I wanted to do was to get it to stop completely. I felt my entire mood sour and I didn't care. This was not going to be fun.

             
"Please do not begin to get upset. There's nothing we can do, this has to happen, it is only for what, three weeks tops? Then you will be back on US soil and we'll feel closer again. I cannot stand to watch you so upset. Especially not when I know that I am the cause." The lines had returned to his face and he frowned.

             
"It's not your fault. I understand you have to go. I'm just so used to having you here. I feel like we've finally reached this place where we understand each other and what happens if that disappears again?"

             
"It won't. I will write you everyday if you'd like. It will be only weeks until I will be accompanying you to your friend's wedding. I'll be thinking about you every moment between now and then. I promise." He hugged me tight and held me to him.

             
"Come on, you can come with me while I pack." I followed him toward the condo.

             
When I stepped into the room I was amazed. Here I was blown away by the condo that Charlotte's parents owned. I walked into the living room and was shocked at the vaulted ceilings. The living room was at least three times as large as ours and the kitchen was double the size. The furniture was all a light gray with light blue hues.

             
"Come on," he whispered as we walked down a hallway. We turned into a bedroom and he closed the door. "I'm sure that Jason is sleeping so we'll have to be quiet. It's already past four in the morning. Hopefully he is resting so he can get something done on the plane and I can sleep. Go, sit down on the bed, relax," he said as he went into the closet.

             
We didn't say much as he packed his belongings that were hanging in the closet. It didn't take long before his two suitcases were packed and zippered and sitting by the bedroom door. He climbed in bed next to me and put his arm around me. It wasn't long and we both were fast asleep.

             
I was startled awake at a loud, shrilling sound. Cole rolled over and immediately stuffed his hand in his pocket and pulled out his cell.

             
"Hello?" He answered groggily. "Yes, I'm here...I'll be down in a few minutes...No, just haven't slept all night...not quite...see you in a minute." He hung up and put the phone back in his pocket.

             
"Jason is wondering why I am not already downstairs. Our car will be here momentarily. We've got to get up." He rose out of bed and stretched. The light from outside was just starting to shine in the windows and I begrudgingly got up. He started wheeling his bags down the hallway to the front door. I stood in the living room, watching him move quickly.

             
"You shouldn't be up. You're exhausted, look at you." He hugged me briefly and kissed my cheek. "You need to go straight to bed, come, I'll walk you to your room first." I shook my head.

             
"I'll come down with you." His face fell and he gave me a disapproving look.

             
"Is that wise?"

             
"No, but I don't care." I held the door for him as he brought his bags out of the room. We stood almost on separate sides of the elevator as we waited to reach the ground floor. When the doors opened Jason was standing in the middle of the lobby looking none too happy. He gave Cole a stern look and became almost annoyed when he saw me.

             
"No wonder you're late." He growled as he rolled one of the bags toward the car. I followed the two men just outside the lobby doors.

             
"You literally have two minutes and then we're leaving whether you're in the car or not." I heard Jason say as he got into the car. Cole walked over to me and grabbed both of my hands, he gave me a small smile.

             
"Pity me now, for he is always this cranky in the morning." I smiled but could not bring it to reach my eyes.

             
"I don't have but a few minutes. I'll send you an e-mail when I touch down in LA. It will be later today. Please do not worry, this is temporary. There is not going to be a single moment that you are not on my mind. I will replay the night at the bar, the beach, the boat in that indulgent dress, the lower deck of the boat. Every moment has been ingrained in my mind. I cannot express how truly amazing you are. No matter if I am right here or not, you are not far from me. I've been so conflicted over my feelings for you. I have fought so hard to keep you at a safe distance, not just for myself but for you. I can't fight it anymore. I will not deny what you mean to me any longer. I'm completely captivated by you and I refuse to lose you. I need you to promise me that you will have fun with your friends until you leave. Once you get home then you and I will talk about our next step. Please promise me you will have fun, but not too much please. I hate the thought of leaving you here, with that." His head nodded to the dress in my hand. I gave him a soft smile. I couldn't help it. Tears started escaping my eyes. His hands quickly began brushing them off of my face.

             
"No, no, no. Stop that. You will hear from me this evening, check your e-mail. Have fun, promise me."

             
"I promise," I said in a hoarse whisper.

             
"Go up and get some sleep. You've been up nearly 24 hours. Get some sleep, you'll feel better and by then I will have landed and you can continue your vacation." He started walking towards the car and waved the whole way. I wrapped my arms around my chest as I watched him open the door and get inside. The tears were beyond my control at this point as I stood and cried as the car pulled out of the parking lot.

Chapter 12

To: Olivia Adamson

From: Cole Cooper

Subject: Safety

Date: June 12th 2012 1:03 PM

Olivia,

I've arrived safely. I'm on my way back to the house. I hope you took my advice and went to bed. You looked exhausted, but still beautiful. The weather here is not quite as nice as Mexico. Like I said, I have not stopped thinking of you. I really do want you to have fun. I would never forgive myself if I messed up your trip with your friends. Do not be too sad Olivia, all will be well. If you still want me when you get home I will be waiting. Until then I will be standing by, counting down the days until we are both in the same country. Always thinking of you.

C.C.

To: Cole Cooper

From: Olivia Adamson

Subject: One Day

Date: June 13th 2012 9:48 AM