The Sacrificial Lamb (20 page)

Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane.

The name was a steady intonation in her head as she tried in vain to recall his sweet face. His hair, clipped short, just a few shades lighter than hers. His big soulful brown eyes and the wide smile he greeted her with. All the things that gave her comfort and security.

Every time he would come into focus, it was swiftly replaced by the look Domenic had given her while they were in the kitchen at lunch. He had been leaning forward, his eyes—green fire—roamed over her attentively. Domenic’s lips had parted and his tongue curled down over his bottom lip, moistening it as if before a kiss. She had been trapped in his gaze like a dragonfly in amber.

Why was this happening to her? Yes, they’d had a fun time today, but he was still a member of the mob. It was so easy to forget in this tiny cabin—away from everything else—that he was a criminal. Here he was just Domenic. A handsome, intelligent, well-spoken gentleman. And he could play Scrabble like nobody’s business.

Alex jumped up off the bed and began to pace around the room. She circled it a few times all the while reciting the same thing over and over again.

Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane. Shane.

Ugh, it was
not
working. Part of the problem was that she hadn’t seen Shane in months. They emailed each other every day and tried to speak on the phone a few times a week, but it just wasn’t the same. Alex had gone back to Boulder for spring break in March, and that was the last they had spent any time together.

If she was going to be honest, she had been chomping at the bit to get back to Chicago. Alex had outgrown Boulder, and she had been annoyed that all Shane wanted to do was spend time at the Elkhorn State Park. They had done that for years. Surely he was sick of that place by now? But that was the thing—he wasn’t sick of it—and he wanted to live in his hometown for the rest of his life.

Alex knew that he loved living in Montana, but she didn’t know if she could see herself staying in their small town forever. Of course her father would be ecstatic if they did, but she wasn’t certain that was what she wanted for her life. Whenever she mentioned how hard she had worked to create a career for herself, Shane would always tell her that she could teach in Boulder. While he was right, that hadn’t been her life’s goal, and she was upset he discounted what she wanted in favor of what he wanted.

They had argued quite a bit during that visit home and hadn’t come to any kind of resolution. Even though Alex wanted to stay in Chicago, they decided that she would graduate and return to Boulder. At that point she planned to look for work in one of the larger cities nearby, and if she was successful, they would work things out then. It wasn’t the best solution, but that was the one they could come up with if they wanted to stay together.

Sighing, Alex stopped pacing and went to look out the window. She tapped her fingers against the glass—a reflection of her inner turmoil. She hadn’t wanted to admit it to Domenic, but he’d been right. Being with Shane made her feel trapped. It wasn’t that she didn’t love him—she did—but she just didn’t see a way to make their future work. One of them would always be unhappy, and that would lead to resentment. She had a feeling it would be she who would have to concede, and that thought made her scared and nervous.

At this point, she no longer knew if she stayed with Shane for love or convenience. He was safe. He was home. He kept her grounded. Shane had an uncanny ability to make her smile no matter what was happening in her life. He was so easy to be around. Alex had never been more comfortable with anyone than she was with him. He was her best friend.

Then she thought of Domenic and the exhilarating electricity that seemed to crackle between them sometimes. She wondered if perhaps comfort was overrated.

Obviously, she wasn’t in love with Domenic. Nor could she ever be. Alex doubted very much that her father would be receptive to her bringing a mobster home for dinner. And wasn’t as if Domenic would be jumping at the chance to bring her to the mob family picnic. No, there was no future there—that was for sure. What was there was some sort of primal attraction.

But Domenic had done one important thing. He had made her scrutinize her current relationship. If Alex ever saw Shane again, she would need the strength to explain these things to him. It would be difficult and heart-wrenching, but she knew now that perhaps they just weren’t meant to stay together. Her life’s path would have eventually taken her away from Boulder, and she would have followed it, no matter how difficult that would have been.

Then again, she didn’t even know where that path would lead any longer. She didn’t think that once her father testified they would all of a sudden be safe. There was a good chance they would have to be whisked away for good to hide from the Liseni. Alex doubted they would be allowed to go on with their simple lives if John Montgomery did his duty. It was very possible that she wouldn’t have the choice of staying with Shane, even if she wanted to.

Thinking of the turn her life had taken brought Domenic to mind again. What strange twist of fate had led him to her? Alex felt as if God had listened to her prayers while she was in that warehouse and sent her an angel. But like any other ethereal creature, his presence in her life would be temporary. Once these two weeks were over, she would most likely never see Domenic again.

In one way she was relieved, as something about Domenic made Alex very aware of herself. It was as if all the nerve endings in her body came alive when he was near. She imagined it was like a bundle of metal shavings in the vicinity of a powerful magnet. The feeling was disconcerting to say the least. Fighting against it was useless, especially when he look at her in a certain way that forcibly reminded her that she was a woman in the presence of a man.

Today when Domenic told her about his parents and their fabled love, it had touched Alex. He had been vulnerable and wistful all at once, and it was a side of him she hadn’t seen before. Talking of love seemed like a very dangerous thing. The look they’d shared echoed through Alex’s body even now, calling up unbidden desires. It would have been very easy to lean toward him, just to see what would happen. Somehow she had come back to herself before doing anything stupid.

Luckily they had Scrabble as a way to defuse the situation and were able to get past the awkwardness. Concentrating on the game made deep conversation next to impossible. Alex felt they had met their quota of sharing life events for the evening and was more than ready to move on. When they were all Scrabble’d out, she was worried the undercurrent would return, but Domenic had grabbed a book from the hutch, and they’d read in companionable silence.

Or rather Domenic had read, and Alex had stolen secret glances at him over her book. He sat on the chair almost directly across from her, and she couldn’t help but examine his profile. His hair was tousled since he couldn’t keep his hands off it. Every time he had reached up to push his forelock away from his brow, her eyes followed the movement. And then, of course, she would take stock of the rest. The line of his nose, the fullness of lip, the strong square chin, and defined jaw covered in a scruff of facial hair. Alex had also noticed the curve of his ears and how his sideburns were a bit too long to be considered fashionable. Here in the cabin, Domenic looked unkempt, but somehow he pulled it off.

She must have read the same sentence a hundred times—until she just couldn’t stand it any longer—and had fled to her room.

And now she was hiding. Hiding from Domenic, but mostly hiding from herself. She wanted to go back to the time when she first met and detested him—when she didn’t see him as anything more than a well-dressed thug. It had been just over a week since the day of the pretended assault, yet so much had changed. Alex had thought Domenic the worst of the bunch, and now she was holed up in a cabin alone with him.

After a while, all this circular thinking exhausted her, and she turned off the lamp by her bedside. Wiggling out of the shorts she was wearing, she tossed them on the floor and got under the covers to settle in to sleep. She must have been more exhausted than she had thought because she couldn’t recall being awake for very long.

“Tell me about your friends in Chicago.”

Domenic was sprawled on the couch, head at one end, feet hanging over the other. He looked like some exotic jungle cat stretched out like that—calm, yet still with that hint of danger about him.

“What do you want to know?” Alex asked, putting her book down on her lap.

“Who they are. How you met. The usual.”

The morning had gone on much like this. She read, and Domenic asked questions about her life occasionally. They had started with her childhood—what she could remember anyway. She had talked about her father and living in Boulder. That alone had taken up most of the morning. She should have been asking about Domenic’s life in return, but he seemed hesitant to talk about it, and she wanted to avoid a repeat of yesterday. Alex had a feeling his life was more tragic than she knew, and her automatic reaction would be to comfort him. Something about getting that close to him still made her nervous.

“Hmm. Well my best friend is Sue. She was in my Master’s program. And then there’s her boyfriend, Dean, and our other friends, Simon and Michelle. That’s pretty much it.”

“That’s it?” he asked, surprised.

“I’ve never been much of a social butterfly,” she said, shrugging. “What about you? Tell me about your friends.”

“Well, there’s Tony Two Fingers and Micky the Mangler…guess I can’t forget about Eddy One-Eye.”

Alex stared at Domenic with her mouth hanging open and then noticed his shoulders shake. Finally he couldn’t hold it in any longer and started to laugh.

“You jerk!” she said, launching her book at his head. He caught it easily, still hooting with laughter.

“You should have seen your face!”

Her pique was being replaced by amusement as she watched him laugh. For a few moments he seemed carefree and unlike the serious and brooding man he usually was.

“Fine, don’t tell me.” She sulked. “Can I have my book back, please?”

Domenic leaned up on one elbow and lobbed it back to her. He was still snorting to himself, and she tried to look wounded. It wasn’t working very well, and her mouth quirked up in a small smile.

“Alexis, it’s not like that,” Domenic said, getting serious all of a sudden. “In my line of work, you don’t
have
friends.”

“None?”

“Well, not in the traditional sense of the word. I know guys I can grab a drink with, but that’s about as far as it goes.”

“That’s kind of…sad.”

“That’s just the way it is.” Domenic shrugged and placed his hands behind his head, staring up at the ceiling.

“What about friends from before?” she asked, trying to steer the conversation into happier territory.

“I’ve only had one close friend, Russell. The rest were acquaintances.”

“Russell? As in your brother-in-law, Russell?” It wasn’t a common name, and she doubted it was simply coincidence.

“The very same.”

“So he married your baby sister?” She saw Domenic’s jaw clench and reconsidered her choice of happier subject matter. “We can talk about something else if this upsets you,” she offered.

“No, it’s okay. When my mother passed on, Russell’s parents kind of adopted Bianca and me. I was already at Harvard, so I wasn’t around very much. Russell always wanted to be a cop, so he stayed in Chicago to join the academy. While I was gone, Bianca and Russell bonded.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Did that upset you? I figured you would be happy your sister loved someone you loved as well.”

Domenic turned his head to look at her. He was frowning, but then his brows rose for a second, and he looked speculative. “I suppose. I didn’t think of it that way. I
am
glad that they’re together because I don’t have to worry about Bianca as long as Russell is around. A lot of times, however, it felt as if I’d been replaced. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, it makes sense,” she replied softly. “You said you hadn’t seen Russell in four years. What happened?”

“He became a cop, and I joined the Liseni.” He snorted as if it should have been self-explanatory.

“What about Bianca? When was the last time you saw her?”