The Sea of Aaron (11 page)

“I'm glad you were pardoned by Israel,” she said, trying to focus on the more positive aspects of his revelation.

Aaron shrugged. “Not that it mattered. I haven't been back since.”

“Not even to see your family?”

“No.”

His response was so blunt that she had no desire to take it any further. Instead, she found herself wondering at what point exactly his son and his son's mother had gotten into the picture. She remained silent for a few minutes before asking.

“Were you living in the United States when you met your son's mother?”

“No, that happened soon after my exile to Cielo Vista. She was Connie McDade, a journalist from the United States who was there on assignment. I was one of the people she interviewed.”

“Apparently you gave her more than an interview,” Valerie said wryly.

Aaron's expression did not change. “I'll offer no excuses for what happened between us, other than we were both reckless and irresponsible. On my part the attraction was purely physical, and when it was time for her to move on to another assignment, I was ready to let go, even though she wanted to continue the relationship. She kept writing me after she returned to the U.S., but I never answered any of her letters.”

Pretty cold-hearted,
Valerie thought.
But considering the circumstances, not altogether surprising.
He'd still been very young, recently exiled—and, even though he'd never admit it, seriously rebounding from the loss of Saniyah.

When she offered no comment, Aaron continued. “In case you're wondering, Connie never said anything about being pregnant in those letters. We lost contact and I didn't hear from her again until eight years later. By then I was a citizen of the United States and working as a test pilot.”

“She told you eight years later. Why? Was she looking for child support?”

“No, although I would have paid it. She had a decent paying job and she came from a relatively wealthy family. I suppose she reconsidered when she got married and her husband didn't want to legally adopt someone else's kid. Maybe she realized there might come a time when the kid would want to know who his real father was.”

“How
thoughtful
of her.” Valerie was appalled by the idea of a woman being pregnant and not even bothering to tell the father, even if that father wanted nothing to do with the baby.

Aaron smirked. “I was shocked to learn that I had a kid. Didn't know a thing about parenthood and still don't. Never wanted a child. But I did tell her that when the boy got older, if he ever came looking for me, that I would at least talk to him and then he could make his own decision to reject me.”

“That's so cynical and assuming.”

Aaron merely shrugged. “He did come looking, and much earlier than any of us expected. At eleven, his mother told me he was rebellious and causing all kinds of problems in her blue-blood society and she said that he wanted to see me.”

“In what part of the country were Andrew and his mother living?”

“South Carolina.”

“My mother came from South Carolina,” Valerie said. “Totally different worlds, of course.” She realized she had interrupted him just to say something trite. “Never mind. Please go on.”

“As it turned out, I had a summer off from assignment and was spending it in Miami renovating
Saniyah II.
I was planning on alienating that kid so badly that he'd be all too eager to go back to his mom and behave himself. Instead, we bonded.”

Valerie smiled, imagining how aggravated Aaron must have been dealing with an eleven-year-old. “I take it Andrew turned out to be a lot like you.”

Aaron guided the helm slightly to the left. “Noah sums it up best. He says the seed didn't fall far from the tree, it just landed in better soil.”

Valerie laughed openly. “That sounds like Noah.”

“Drew continued living with his mother and stepfather, of course. No way he could live with me, but we spent a few more summers sailing together.”

“Danny Perez mentioned something about those summers,” Valerie said.

Aaron's eyes narrowed. “Did he, now? Danny always did talk too much.”

“Don't blame Danny. He couldn't help being impressed, considering his relationship with his own father.”

“Despite what he might have told you, my relationship with Drew is nothing like a storybook relationship. We respect each other, true, but we also keep a respectful distance…a healthy distance. It works for us.”

They were rapidly approaching a small strip of land and Aaron had begun trimming the sails while she automatically moved to the helm, amazed by how quietly, how subtlety in sync they worked. She wondered if he was as aware of their joint precision as she was.

“Bannerman's Caye,” he announced. “One of the most remote atolls you'll ever come across.”

She didn't care about Bannerman's Caye. She wanted him to continue talking, but at the moment
Saniyah II
was between them and demanding his attention as only a jealous lover could.

Powdery white sand stretched out before them as they trudged further inland, heading for the shade of the clustered palm trees. Because of the reef and surrounding rocks, they had taken an inflatable motorized dinghy to the most accessible part of the shore.

Aaron carried the cooler containing the lunch that they planned to have on the deserted island.

“Who owns this spot?” Valerie asked, scanning the horizon.

“The Belize government. Environmentalists and divers visit on occasion, but tourists rarely come out here. Nothing to interest them.”

And so here she was, alone on a deserted island with the man she'd been pining after for two long years, and the only thing they intended to do was talk and eat. Could it be possible that Aaron had set her up deliberately, knowing that very few women could resist such a setting? She busied herself with the food in order to avoid looking directly into his eyes, lest she see something presumptuous and diabolical lurking there.

Being in such close proximity to each other and in such a relaxed environment, Valerie could no longer avoid looking into his eyes. First, she studied him as he half reclined, his upper body partially propped up by his elbows. Breathtaking. She swallowed hard and moved her focus up, and what she saw in his eyes both unnerved and allured her. In place of the cold, hard edge, she saw warmth and passionate desire.

“Aaron, what are you thinking?”

The wistfulness in her tone seemed to shake him out of his reverie. “The same thing you're thinking,” he replied.

Valerie shook her head incredulously and laughed. “That's exactly what I was afraid of. Perhaps it's time to abandon paradise.”

“Why? We don't need anyone's permission to enjoy the moment.”

“That's true to a degree, but we are accountable for our actions. I'm not interested in regrets later.”

His eyes studied her in that now-familiar intense way, and for a moment she saw a glimmer of humor lurking. How could he possibly find what she'd just said funny?

“So, then, you have no more questions about my life?”

His abrupt return to their earlier discussion, the reason for the outing in the first place, almost made her laugh with relief.

“I still have more. Let me think a moment. Let's see. You and Noah own one of the largest courier services in the world. Jasmine told me how the company got started but…” She hesitated for a moment, trying to gather all her thoughts. “You have alluded to your military background, but how involved are you right now? What were you doing when you got shot?”

Aaron glanced at the sky. “We're known as troubleshooters. A team of us were in Somalia when we came under fire. I was shot while trying to protect someone who had gotten careless. Other than that, I can't go into detail.”

She frowned, exasperated that he wasn't going to tell her the exact purpose for the mission in Somalia. “Well, were you able to save this person?”

“Yes.”

“And that's all you're going to say about it?”

“Yes. But I won't hide it from you that Avian International has another branch, which operates secretly under a different name. Some of its backing comes from U.S. security forces and international special interest groups.” He paused as though censoring his words. “Myself and the men involved are engaged in rooting out terrorists and doing what we can to maintain a level of world peace. Sometimes if our goals are the same, we work along with the CIA, Mossad, and others, but again I'll emphasize, they do not own us. More specifically they do not own me.”

“That's mind-boggling. How can any organization do such a thing as maintain world peace?”

“We can't, but we do try, and while we like to think of ourselves as the good guys, it often depends on what side of the fence you're sitting on.” He took a deep breath. “We don't always win, but someone has to speak and act for those who are powerless…those who have no voice.”

She flinched because she wanted badly to say that the One who created the universe would one day act for the meek, the humble, and the downtrodden, but again, the timing wasn't right. Her duty was to keep quiet and listen. “And you're still actively involved in this organization?”

“Not as active as I once was, and I'm seriously considering retirement, at least from field agent status. Noah and I have enough to do just running the commercial end of Avian International.”

Valerie wondered if he heard her sigh of relief when he said that. Of course she wanted him to do much more than just consider retirement, but at least what he'd said was a start down the right road.

“It's your turn to talk now,” Aaron said.

Her turn to talk?
She was still absorbing everything he'd just told her, and anything she might say positively paled in comparison to just one tiny episode of his life. She stretched and smiled wanly. “What could you possibly want to know about me? Yesterday you pretty much summed up my whole life in five seconds.”

“Ahh, but you told me that those so-called five seconds were statistics. For starters, why did you marry a forty-year-old college professor when you were only eighteen?”

She groaned inwardly. “I was afraid you were going to ask that. And for the record, he wasn't forty.”

Aaron ignored her reticence. “He was thirty-eight. A moot point, don't you think?”

His bluntness still disconcerted her, but she might as well get used to it. “My reasoning at the time was incredibly stupid,” she said slowly. “I suppose I can begin by saying that I was really close to my father, and when he died so suddenly, so unexpectedly, I felt lost. And if that wasn't bad enough, no one seemed sympathetic to my pain. Friends and family were all telling me that I would have to leave college and come back home to take care of my mother, which was the last thing I wanted to do. Harrison Porter was a sympathetic friend and he asked me to marry him. I saw it as an excuse to remain in Ohio.”

Aaron studied his wine glass. “Couldn't you have made the decision to stay without marrying?”

She sighed. “I could have, but guilt made it difficult. You see, I figured if I had my own family and lived in Ohio, no one would expect me to make all those sacrifices.”

“So why did your mother need so much care? Surely she didn't have Alzheimer's back then.”

Valerie clenched her teeth upon hearing that he knew all about the Alzheimer's, too. “No. She didn't have it then. But my mother was…was…How do I even begin to explain her? She was the most helpless, weak, clingy person you'd ever want to meet. She couldn't make even a simple decision without asking my father, and whenever my brother and I needed something, she always told us to ask him, too. If the house needed repair and my father couldn't do it himself, he was the one who had to call the plumber, the roofer, whatever, and he always had to be at home if business people came in the house.” Valerie paused, annoyed by her own revelation and hoped Aaron wouldn't want to hear more.

“Why?” he asked, disappointing her.

“Because…because she was nervous around strangers. She didn't even want Greg and me to have friends over…not that we would have anyway, since she embarrassed us. The only friend my mother didn't mind having around was Jasmine. She was just so weird. Even when we had problems at school, my father was the one who had to go speak to the teachers and whatnot.”

“Go on,” Aaron said when she hesitated.

“I really don't want to bore you with this nonsense.” Valerie twined her fingers through her hair. “I'm not a teenager anymore, and I know that there are no perfect families.”

“If I were bored, I would be asleep by now,” Aaron said.

Valerie sighed. “My mother wasn't a mother. I never understood her. She was always telling me not to do certain things, but she never explained why. Do you realize that it was my father who told me the facts of life…my father who explained to me the things a mother is supposed to tell a young girl. My God, Aaron, whenever I asked her something she always looked at me with this vapid expression. If a head of cabbage had an expression, that's how she looked, and she'd say, ‘Ask your father.' No. Not like that, she was from the South and she had this really obvious Southern accent. She'd say ‘Ask yuh fahthuh.' ” Her voice rose. “ ‘Ask yuh fahhhthuh…ask yuh fahhh— ' ”

She stopped because he was laughing and she hadn't even been aware of how melodramatically she'd been speaking. Her first reaction was embarrassment that he was making fun of her, but then she realized it was the first time she'd seen him laugh outright. His deep baritone chuckle along with his blazing smile, was so incredibly sexy it took her breath away and she had to laugh, too.

“You've got a bit of the actress in you,” Aaron said.

“I tend to get carried away when it comes to discussing family dysfunctions,” she replied, trying not to stare at him because her attention had suddenly focused on a silver dog tag dangling against his chest. She fought the urge to reach out and grasp it.

Aaron sat up straighter and the tag slid mercifully from sight. He glanced out to sea at the boat rocking on the waves. “And so your marriage ended in a year. Who divorced whom?”

“It was a mutual divorce, actually. No hard feelings. I know now that I didn't love him, and he just married me to have children. After I had a miscarriage, it was over.”

“The fact that you even got pregnant is amazing considering that the man was gay,” Aaron said.

Oh, God, he knows that part, too.
“More specifically, he was bisexual,” she said, embarrassed but trying not to convey her emotions. “And I didn't know that when I married him.”

“I never suggested you did,” Aaron said.

Valerie fought to control a grimace as she remembered that a few years after the divorce, she'd learned that Harrison had moved in with his same-sex partner. “Look, it was humiliating, okay? And you seem to know the whole story anyway.”

He shrugged. “So after the divorce you ended up returning to your mother's house.”

“Yes. I left Ohio University, gave up my dreams and went to a local community college and became a nurse.”

“Was becoming a nurse such a bad thing?”

“No. Just the fact that I let circumstances get in the way of my original goal.”

“Why
did
you go back home when your mother managed to survive a year without you?”

“She didn't survive on her own,” Valerie said ruefully. “Her sister Marilyn was going through a divorce and she came to live with her during that time. Aunt Marilyn is nothing like my mother.”

When the conversation finally lulled, Aaron shaded his eyes with his hand and gazed out to sea. “It's time to go,” he said. “There's a boat coming, and I'm not interested in company.”

Valerie didn't see anything beyond the endless blue, but she helped him gather their things and they made their way back to
Saniyah II.

***

Once she was back on land and alone in her room, Valerie wondered why Aaron's first question about her personal life had been about her sham of a marriage. There were so many other things he could have started with. Could it be possible that he was concerned over whether or not she had actually been in love with Harrison Porter? If that was the case, he definitely had nothing to worry about.

But there was no point in trying to analyze him because caution and common sense had eluded her. He was the most unique person she'd ever met, and good or bad, right or wrong, she knew there was no way she was ever going to be able to simply return to her life without including him in it.

Jasmine had left a message on her cell and Valerie felt guilty that she didn't want to hear from her right now. The truth was she did not know exactly what to say. How was she going to logically explain the constant delays in her departure from Belize?

“Get a grip,” she mumbled aloud. “You're a grown woman who doesn't have to give an explanation to anyone.”

She knew Jasmine had good intentions and that her warnings about Aaron actually did have some validity, but her best friend simply refused to acknowledge that she could feel the same intense desire for Aaron that Jasmine felt for her own husband, Noah.

Sometimes God allowed disparate people to come into each other's lives for a reason, and no way was she going to just turn aside and let her window of opportunity slam shut, even if the person at the window had led an extraordinarily harrowing life and faced a precarious future. She was convinced that Aaron Weiss was redeemable, that he wasn't some crude, calculating warmonger, but a human being with needs, wants, and vulnerabilities, a man who maybe could use a little joy in his life. She recalled his captivating smile and his laugh. He didn't reveal that side often enough, but maybe she could encourage it.

Yes, he could be her diamond in the rough. With a little refinement and polishing, the possibilities were delectably endless.

She listened to Jasmine's message.

“Val, if you don't get back to me tonight, this is the last time I'm calling because I'm headed for Dallas on business tomorrow. You'll probably be back before I am. Your mother is all right and I had your car fixed. Oh, and your brother called me because he couldn't reach you. I told him you were on vacation in Belize, but I didn't give him any details. You might want to call him.
Ciao
.”