The SEAL Next Door (Alpha SEALs Book 5) (4 page)

When she’d heard from Beckett years ago that Matthew had returned from his first deployment, it had been gut-wrenching.  She’d never know where he was, when he’d return, or if he was safe.  Scratch that—he was likely always in danger when he deployed.  And just like that, the boy next door had turned into a man with a life and career of his own—one that would never include her.

Their eyes locked for a second more, some unspoken bond tethering them together, and then Matthew cleared his throat, breaking the spell.  “I should go.  I just got in, and I haven’t even seen my folks yet.”

Brianna shakily nodded in agreement.  He should definitely go.  Before either one of them did something foolish.  Before she blurted out something she’d always regret.

“Thanks for your help,” she said softly.  “Can I get you a drink or something before you leave?”

He nodded, his eyes burning.  “A glass of water would be great,” he said, his voice gravel.

She silently moved to another cupboard, pulling out two glasses.  When she turned back around Matthew was already right there behind her, and she gasped.  She hadn’t even heard him move across the room.  A beat passed before Matthew took both glasses from her and crossed to the fridge, filling each glass with ice and water.

“I didn’t even ask what you wanted to drink,” he said as he handed her one of the cups.

“Water’s perfect.”  She took a sip, the cool liquid seeping down her throat, and suddenly felt like the entire room was too hot.

Or maybe it was just the man standing in front of her.

Matthew drained his water in one long gulp.  His eyes were softer as he gazed at her once more, and briefly, he skimmed his thumb across her cheek.  “It was good to see you Brianna.”

She froze, too startled by his caress to say anything else.

“I’ll see you Sunday.”

His abrupt dismissal felt like a dagger to her chest.  Of course she wouldn’t see him again until Sunday.  He was here for Beckett’s homecoming, not to catch up on old times with her.  Not to spend Friday night reminiscing about their younger years.  They barely even knew each other anymore.  Not really.  And that moment that had just passed between them was just that—a moment.  Fleeting.  Ephemeral.  Probably already forgotten by him.

“Right, I’ll see you then,” she said tightly, turning back to put away the rest of the groceries.  She heard Matthew’s quiet footsteps as he retreated back toward the front door, and then she was alone, surrounded by nothing but deafening silence.

***

Matthew released a breath he didn’t even know he’d been holding as he crossed the lawn back to his parents’ house.  What the hell had just happened?  His pulse pounded as he tried to get a grip.  He clenched his firsts, grinding his jaw, and snatched up the duffle bag he’d left in their driveway.  He needed to go for a ten-mile run to let out his pent-up sexual frustration, or if nothing else, take a very,
very
cold shower.  Because the hard-on he’d been sporting since he’d first seen Brianna bending over the trunk of her car?

Holy hell.

He had no damn business looking at the girl—woman—who’d always been like a kid sister to him like that.  He had no right to want her that way.  But when he’d followed her inside, inhaling her light floral scent, watching that long blonde hair swish back and forth?  He’d been a goner.  Then she’d turned away from him, stretching up on those toned legs to reach the top shelf?

Jesus.

Her gorgeous legs went on for miles, leading up to that sweet ass he’d very much like to palm as he pulled her closer.  Her lithe body was tanned, toned, and curvy in all the right places.  Soft exactly where he was hard.  He’d longed to cross the kitchen, pull her into his arms, and kiss her.  Just to see how she’d react.  And hell, who was he kidding?  What he’d really wanted to do was bend her over the counter, palm those lush breasts, and sink his way straight into heaven.  The idea of their bodies joined together with her crying out his name in pleasure would be something he’d never forget.

Hell, she was a woman now, only four years younger than him.  Not the girl who’d trailed after Beckett and him as kids.  But something about her was still innocent and pure.  Not like the bold women who came onto him and his buddies back home.  Who flaunted their bodies and practically begged to be taken home for the night.  And hell if he didn’t want to spend time getting fully reacquainted with Brianna.  Intimately.

He counted to ten, willing his body to calm down before he went inside his childhood home.  It was ridiculous to even consider the notion of having Brianna that way—like she was his every fantasy come to life.  Like he’d really fuck a woman he cared about, felt protective toward, in the middle of her kitchen after not seeing her in years.

Like his best friend wouldn’t bust his ass for even thinking about it.

Shit.

He gulped down air as the guilt threatened to overtake him.  It wasn’t his fault Beckett was injured.  Not really.  Even if he hadn’t convinced him to enlist a lifetime ago, Beckett probably damn would’ve done so anyway.  Just to keep up with Matthew.  Just because he was that damn stubborn.

They were childhood friends, yes, but now brothers in arms.

He needed to man the hell up and be there for his buddy.  His brother.  To face their families as they dealt with the new reality and stay the hell away from his sister.

Finally, he pushed open the front door, shaking his head at the fact that it was unlocked.  His parents didn’t have a worry in the world, but he’d have to talk to them about at least locking up the house.  He certainly wasn’t around to protect them if necessary, and hell.  You never knew who could walk right in here.  He’d even made sure Brianna’s door was secured before he pulled it shut behind him when he left.  Regretfully.  Because wouldn’t he love to go back over there and see what it was simmering between them.  Hell, they’d only been in each other’s presence for ten minutes.  And for him to be this riled up over
that
?  A night with her in his arms would be fucking spectacular.

But that was the crux of it, wasn’t it?  Because one night with her would never be enough.  And she deserved far better than a one-night-stand with her older brother’s best friend.

“Matthew, is that you?” his mom called from the kitchen.

He muttered a curse under his breath.  If she left the damn door unlocked, it could be just about anyone, now couldn’t it?

“Yeah, it’s me.”

She came rushing into the room, embracing him in a hug.  “Thank goodness you made it home safely! Beckett’s parents have been so upset since his accident.  I’m always so worried about you doing your SEAL stuff.  But I know they’ll be so happy to see you—Beckett, too.”

“I’m fine, Mom.”

“Your job is just so dangerous…,” she trailed off, fretting.

“We’re well trained.  And although accidents can happen, that’s the risk you take when you join the military.  Beckett knew it, and so did I.”  His voice sounded harsher than he’d intended, but hell.  The guilt was practically eating him alive.

“Have you seen his parents?  Oh, what am I saying, you just got home.  Of course you haven’t seen anyone yet.”

Matthew resisted the urge to smile.  His mother always fawned over him when he happened to get leave to make it home.  That was the crux of being an only child.  Some things never changed.

She pulled back, appraising him with green eyes so similar to his.  “Did you eat yet?  I could fix you something.”

“I grabbed lunch earlier before my flight.  Think I’ll go for a run after I get settled in.”

“Did you friend come down?  Evan, was it?”

“Yeah, but he’s staying at a hotel.  He knows Beckett and has some other friends in town he wanted to catch up with.  You’ll meet him on Sunday at the homecoming ceremony.  Some of my other buddies may come in then as well.”

“He’s welcome to stay here, you know.”

“I’m sure he’s cool with the hotel.  Did you need help with anything before I go for a run?”

“No, no.  Everything’s fine.  Just be sure to wash up in time for dinner.  Your father will be home around six.  He’s out running some errands now.”

“Roger that, ma’am.”

His mom playfully swatted his arm and disappeared back into the kitchen.  Briefly, images of Brianna moving around her kitchen flashed through his mind.  Hell, carrying in groceries for her earlier and watching her put things away felt like the most natural thing in the world.  What would it be like having
her
fixing him dinner, looking forward to his return home?  How would it feel to come home to someone like her every night?

Hell.  What was he thinking?  She had her MBA and some sort of hot-shot marketing career.  She was on the fast-track to success.  She wouldn’t want to take care of a man—or to let a man take care of her.

Nope, he was better off alone, just as he’d always been.

Matthew glanced at his watch—Becket would be arriving in less than forty-eight hours.  Two days here, and he could fly back to Little Creek and forget the whole clusterfuck of seeing his best friend injured.  Of pretending things would ever be the same again.  Of trying to convince himself that Brianna was just the girl next door and not someone who could actually make him imagine a future with a woman.  Only question was, how was he supposed to get through the weekend until then?

“I invited the Murphy’s over for dessert tonight,” Brianna’s mother said as they loaded the dishwasher after dinner.  “Did you know Matthew’s back already?”

Brianna nearly dropped the plate she was holding.  “What? Why?”

“Brianna,” her mother admonished. “What’s the matter with you?  We haven’t seen Matthew in years, and he’s one of Beckett’s best friends.”

“No, I mean why did you invite them over? We’ll see them on Sunday with everyone else.”  Heat washed over her skin as she recalled Matthew moving around the kitchen earlier.  Looking like he belonged there or something.  And the way he’d brushed his thumb across her cheek before he left?  She knew she hadn’t imagined the heat in his eyes.  The spark of interest that he’d had in that moment.

But the entire thing was completely ridiculous—he wasn’t interested in her that way.  She was acting like a schoolgirl with a crush on the captain of the football team or something.  She was a grown woman for heaven’s sake.  If her parents wanted to invite the neighbors over, then so be it.  Maybe she should say she’d already made plans for the evening.  Then she could be polite but keep her distance from Matthew when she saw him again on Sunday.  How was she supposed to act natural with him sitting here in the same room as her?  The attraction she’d felt for him years ago had only bloomed in their time spent apart.  He wasn’t a teenage boy anymore but a grown man.  A Navy SEAL who had traveled the world.  And since he’d be gone again in a matter of days, there was no point in imagining anything happening between them.  Not now and not ever.

“They’ve been nothing but supportive with everything we’ve been dealing with as far as Beckett’s recovery is concerned.  Plus your father ran into Mr. Murphy while he was out running errands earlier.  He mentioned Matthew was back, and we thought you kids would enjoy seeing one another.”

Brianna laughed.  “Mom, I’m twenty-six.  Matthew is thirty.  We’re not exactly kids anymore.  And we actually ran into each other this afternoon.  If we wanted to see each other tonight, we could’ve made plans.”  She picked up her glass from the counter and took a sip.

“I think Matthew’s mom would like to see him settled down.  You know, she always hoped you two would end up together.”

Brianna nearly spit out her water.  “Excuse me?”

“Matthew’s her only son.  And she’s always loved you like a daughter.”

“I’m pretty sure Matthew only sees me as a kid sister type.  I trailed after him and Beckett for years, and when they left, I’m almost positive he forgot all about me.”

Her mother laughed. “Well that’s not true at all.  He always asked about you when he was back in town.  More so than Beckett even,” her mom added with a chuckle.

Brianna raised her eyebrows.  Matthew had been checking up on her all this time?  She thought the guy had practically vanished off the face of the Earth.  Funny that this was the first time her mom had mentioned it—now that she had temporarily moved back home and Matthew was conveniently right next door.  “What time are they coming by?”

“Eight.”

She glanced down at the cut-offs and tank top she still had on as the feeling of butterflies took hold in her stomach.  “Thanks for all the notice.”

***

Matthew rang the doorbell of Beckett’s house that evening, his parents standing behind him.  He didn’t know how he’d gotten roped into having dessert with the neighbors tonight, but this was exactly the sort of interaction he was trying to avoid.  He couldn’t bear looking into their eyes as they saw him, healthy with two legs, while his best friend was still in a hospital.  That shit just wasn’t fair, and he’d hoped to see his buddy on Sunday, show his support, and make a hasty departure.  But facing his friend’s parents, who were practically like a second family to him?  That shit was brutal.

Not to mention having to spend the evening with Brianna.  Holy hell.  He’d taken a cold shower before
and
after his run earlier.  That’s how worked up he was from ten minutes together.  Since when had the girl he’d always known turned into such a smoking hot woman?  He’d kept tabs on her over the years—asking Beckett or his parents how she was doing.  Watching from afar when she was younger and still in school when he happened to be in town.  But the years had slipped way, and she sure the hell wasn’t some school girl anymore.  She was all woman—with curves to tempt and tease him, long blonde hair he’d love to run his fingers through, and skin so luscious he wanted to explore every inch of it.

She was the total package—all wrapped up in his buddy’s kid sister.  So what if she wasn’t a kid anymore; a guy didn’t go after his best friend’s sister.  No matter how gorgeous she was.  And hell—he’d been practically like a second older brother all these years.  It was a damn bad idea, plain and simple.  Maybe he could make a hasty departure, feigning exhaustion from his travels.  Maybe—

Brianna opened the door a moment later, pushing all those thoughts from his mind, and Matthew had to remind himself how to breathe.  Her soft blonde hair fell past her shoulders, the tips of it just kissing her breasts.  She had on a soft blouse and dark jeans, but hell.  She might as well have been wearing nothing at all from the way his groin tightened and pulse pounded.  The soft fabric of her top pulled across her full breasts, and those jeans looked like they’d practically been painted on with the way her killer curves were on display.  Even though she was wearing more clothing than when he’d seen her earlier, she looked sexier than ever.

She’s Beckett’s little sister.  She’s Beckett’s little sister.

Maybe if he told himself that a thousand times, his body would catch up with his brain.  But right now, his cock was rock-hard and his libido was roaring.  He shifted uncomfortably on the front porch.

“Hi Matthew, Mr. and Mrs. Murphy,” Brianna said brightly, completely oblivious to his distress.  She gestured for them to come inside.  “Thanks for coming over.”

Matthew walked in first, Brianna’s floral scent surrounding him.  Was that perfume?  Her shampoo?  It was so sweet and innocent that he had the craziest urge to wrap her up in his arms and never let her go.  Which was completely bat shit crazy.  Hell, what would the other dudes on his team think of him acting this way about a woman?  It was true that four of the guys were now happily in relationships, but as for Matthew?  Not a chance in hell.  He was more a love ‘em and leave ‘em type.  And he made sure the women he took home always knew the score.

Not that he’d be getting any action this weekend staying with his folks.  Tonight was family night, tomorrow he’d go out with the guys, and Sunday would be all about Beckett.  So certainly he could keep a certain female off his mind for the next forty-eight hours. Too bad he was currently standing in her living room.

Matthew’s mom followed him in, hugging Brianna’s parents.  “We just can’t wait to see Beckett on Sunday.  Is he excited to finally be coming home?  It must be such a relief to know he’ll be here in a matter of days.”

After the Millers tearfully greeted Matthew, the two mothers settled in to chat on the sofa while Brianna’s dad went to get them drinks.  Soon Matthew was left standing alone with Brianna in the front hall, feeling as nervous as a dumb teenager.  His eyes skimmed over her, from her blonde hair and sweet face, down over her womanly curves.  She looked a hell of a lot better than she did earlier all done up in that makeup.  More natural, but also about a thousand times more beautiful.  He was such a goner.

“What?” she asked, looking up at him with wide eyes the color of the sea.

“You look nice,” he finally said. 
Nice
was the understatement of the century.  Fucking spectacular would have been more appropriate.  He cleared his throat.  “So are we really going to sit around here while our parents chit-chat all night?”

Brianna laughed, a spark in her eyes. “What’d you have in mind?”

Matthew shrugged.  Why the hell was he suddenly feeling tongue-tied around her?  This girl probably knew him as well as he knew himself.  He hardly had a childhood memory without her in it.  “We could grab a drink, go for a walk, whatever.  I just need to do something.  Get out of here.  Too many memories….”

Brianna smiled.  “I’d love to get out of here.  And luckily for you, I’ve got just the place in mind.”

Ten minutes later, they were cruising down the road in Brianna’s convertible.  Matthew felt foolish letting a woman drive him around, but what was he supposed to do?  It was either this or borrow one of his parents’ cars like he was a high school kid again.  And Brianna had actually laughed when he’d offered to drive her car.

“Where are we going, anyway?”

“This cute little bar down by the beach.  It’s new, but I think you’ll love it.  We can grab a drink and enjoy the sunset.”

“Can’t go wrong with that,” Matthew agreed.

“So how long are you in town?” Brianna asked a few minutes later as she turned off the engine.  Matthew was half-tempted to run around the car and open the door for her, but he wasn’t the dating type of guy. And this sure the hell wasn’t a date.  Just two friends grabbing a drink.  Nothing more.

Right.

Her car door slammed shut, and he resisted the urge to go to her, escorting her across the parking lot.  Touching some of that soft skin.  They were just friends.  Not a damn thing had changed.

Brianna continued speaking as they walked toward the bar.  “Maybe we could take Beckett out one night for a beer.  Does that sound good?”

Matthew cleared his throat, feeling guilty.  “Uh, I’m supposed to fly out Sunday night.”

“Really?” Brianna paused at the door, turning to face him, and Matthew nearly bumped into her.  Luckily he’d stopped just in time, or he’d be clutching her to him so she didn’t fall over, those lush breasts of hers pressed up against his chest.  Hell.  Maybe he should’ve knocked the woman right over. Trapped her against the door with his body and kissed her thoroughly, just to see if their chemistry was only in his imagination.  Just to get her out of his system.

He ground his jaw, stepping around her to reach for the handle.  “Yeah, I was lucky my CO gave me time off,” Matthew said, pulling open the door and gesturing for Brianna to walk inside.  A few pairs of male eyes slid her way, and Matthew nearly draped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close.  Staking his claim.  But what exactly would that prove?  She wasn’t his.  Nevertheless, his chest tightened and his eyes narrowed as he glared at the group of dudes at the nearby table.  They hastily went back to their drinks, and Matthew felt a certain sense of male pride building inside him.

Hell.

If he’d acted like any more of a caveman, he would’ve beaten his chest and hauled her over his shoulder, taking her away from other men’s prying eyes.  Taking her somewhere and proving that she was meant to be his.

He glanced back at Brianna, and his heart stuttered slightly as he caught the expression on her face.

“Right,” she said, looking slightly forlorn.  “Well, I’ll take Beckett out for a beer sometime.  Eventually.  It’ll just be hard with the wheelchair.  He’s still getting used to it of course.  And I know he’d love to spend time catching up with you….”

Her voice trailed off, and Matthew suddenly wanted to do anything to take the sadness out of her eyes.  This was exactly why he hadn’t wanted to spend time with Beckett’s family while he was here.  Matthew couldn’t stomach it.  Seeing Beckett’s parents in distress was hard enough earlier, but to see Brianna upset?  He didn’t think he could bear her tears.

She hastened a glance up at him, and Matthew could see moisture in her eyes.  Holy hell.  His chest clenched uncomfortably, and he watched as her lower lip trembled.  Seeing her sad almost felt like his own damn heart was being ripped right out.

Going against his earlier notion to refrain from touching her, he rested his hand against the small of her back.  His hand practically splayed across the entire expanse, and something stirred inside him at the rightness of having Brianna there with him.  Of feeling her delicate blouse beneath his rough fingertips.  It was the only thing separating her soft skin from his touch.  He shook his head, telling himself he was crazy.  This would never end the way he wanted it to—with Brianna writhing beneath him, crying out his name—so why even pretend she was his to take care of?

Tonight he would, he decided.  He wouldn’t take her to bed, obviously, but he’d try to take her mind off the situation.  Maybe talk about that marketing job she loved so much, or her fancy pants MBA.  Brianna had always been whip smart, and even as a kid, he’d known she’d make something of herself.  Not that he was doing so bad himself as a SEAL, but hell.  He’d never be climbing up the corporate ladder like she was.  Trudging through the desert and battling insurgents was more his line of work.  Jumping out of airplanes?  Yes.  Giving PowerPoint presentations in a boardroom to a bunch of suits?  Not a fucking chance.

“Let me buy you a drink,” he said, guiding her toward the crowded bar.

He could see why she liked the place—it was more of a covered deck with views of the ocean than enclosed building.  Waves crashed in the distance, “Margaritaville” cranked over the speakers, and the salty air soothed his soul.  Laughter filled the space around them as they weaved their way through the crowd, the sounds of ice clinking in glasses mixing in with snippets of conversation.