The Sheik's Secret Bride (29 page)

“
Givon
says that
Malik
appreciates your opinions,”
Fatima
told her. “He respects you.”

“As I respect him.”
She paused before going on. She and
Malik
were also making love every night, and that part of their life together was marvelous. Not that she was going to share the details with his grandmother. “I could very easily fall in love with him.”

“Then what is the problem?”

Liana drew in a deep breath. “
Malik
has told me that he will never love me. He believes that the best part of him must be saved for El
Bahar
, and he won’t let himself get tangled up in any serious emotions. So he will care for me and be faithful, but he won’t allow himself to love me. I’m assuming he intends that to also encompass our children, should we have any. So how can I stay with a man who vows never to give me the one thing I want?”

Fatima
regarded her with dark, wise eyes. “Is love so very important?”

“Isn’t it? Chuck and I had infatuation, childish affection and lust. When that wore off, we weren’t left with very much.”

“All the more reason to be sensible the second time around.”

“Sensible,” Liana repeated softly. “It’s not exactly what every young girl dreams of for her marriage.”

“But you are not a young girl. You are a mature woman who has experienced some of life.”
Fatima
touched her glass, but didn’t pick it up. “Did it ever occur to you that
Malik
is deceiving himself? That he speaks the words because he wants them to be true, not because they are?”

Liana blinked. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

“Perhaps you should. How much has he told you of
Iman
?”

“I know that she’s not dead, and that she was unfaithful to him.” She shivered. “I can’t imagine how that must have humiliated him.
Malik
is a proud man.”

“I believe it was one of the darkest moments of his life. Not only because everyone knew what had happened and how his wife had tricked him right here in the palace, but because in his mind, he’d let down his people. He couldn’t see that her betrayal made him so much more human in their eyes. He was no longer a young god, but a real man who could make a mistake. He’d always been adored, but afterward he became truly loved.”

Liana considered
Fatima
’s words. “I don’t think
Malik
sees it that way.”

“He doesn’t. He sees only his mistake and he has vowed it will never happen again.”
Fatima
tilted her head. “Why did he choose you as his wife?”

“I haven’t got a clue. It’s a question I ask myself all the time.”

“Perhaps you should ask
Malik
instead. Perhaps you should think about
Iman
and of how he would make sure he never repeated that kind of mistake again. We are all products of our past.
Malik’s
history has had an influence on him.”

Liana thought she understood what the other woman was saying. “But it’s different with
Malik
. He never loved
Iman
.”

“How do you know?”

“He told me.”

“What else would he say?”

That had not occurred to Liana. If
Malik
had loved his wife, or if he’d been allowing himself to soften towards her and then she’d betrayed him, he would have been destroyed inside. He would have questioned his judgment and would have vowed to never be caught that way again.

He’d lived so much of his life emotionally alone. Oh, there were plenty of people around him, but no one special to hold him and look out for him. No one who didn’t demand but instead gave.

“Perhaps he needs to be shown that he’s found a safe place again,”
Fatima
said softly. “I believe it is in both you and your daughter to heal his bruised heart and allow him to open himself again. If he were to be loved, he might allow himself to love. Look at his actions, not his words. Then think about what you see there. Don’t be hasty, Liana. Be very sure on this. Isn’t he worth that at least?”

Once again the queen had given Liana plenty to think about. Later that afternoon she stood on one of the high balconies on the north end of the palace and looked out over the vast land that blended into the desert.

The sea was to the south of the palace and the city stretched out on both the east and west sides of the royal grounds. But behind the carefully cultivated gardens was only wilderness. Liana didn’t know how much land the Khan family owned, but she knew their property stretched for miles.

From where she stood she had a clear view of the riding trails and the stable. Two specks appeared in the distance. In time they would show themselves to be her daughter and
Malik
, out for their afternoon ride.

Despite his busy schedule, he always made time for
Bethany
. Sometimes they rode in the morning and sometimes after she returned from school, but at least six days out of seven found them together on horseback.

She’d been wrong about him, Liana thought to herself. She’d accused him of using her daughter to get to her, but that hadn’t been his plan at all. For reasons that didn’t make sense, his devotion to her child seemed easy and natural. Why did he do it? Liana loved her daughter with all her heart and believed her to be bright and charming, but she was still only nine.
Hardly a sophisticated companion for someone like
Malik
.
Yet he sought
Bethany
out, and seemed to find pleasure in the relationship for its own sake.

Fatima
’s words—that she and Bethany had the power to heal
Malik’s
heart—came to her. Was that true? And if it was, how on earth was she going to walk away from him? No woman in the world could resist such a challenge. To heal a man such as
Malik
would be the most extraordinary work of her life.

She glanced around at the seldom-used balcony garden. She’d found it last week and had begun to rearrange the potted plants and trees until they created a secluded private sanctuary just as she’d done on the rooftop garden. Her latent interest in gardening and decorating had begun to assert itself, and she’d found herself wondering if there was a detailed inventory of the treasures in the palace. If not, it was a job she would enjoy. She’d seen the storerooms and knew that there were hundreds of wonders there. Different antiques needed to be rotated in and out of the public rooms so that all could enjoy them.
And what about preservation and restoration?
Had anyone seen to that?

She knew what was happening to her. She was slowly making a life for herself here at the palace. It was a dangerous thing to do, because she still didn’t know how to handle her future. Was she staying?

She turned back to the view and saw that Bethany and
Malik
were already at the stables.
Malik
dismounted,
then
helped
Bethany
down. Her daughter surprised her by throwing her arms around the prince.
Malik
surprised her even more by hugging her daughter back. There was something comfortable and familiar about their actions, as if they’d been performed dozens of times before. Actions not words, she thought, as
Fatima
had instructed her.

Her chest tightened as hope filled her. Was
Fatima
right? Could she and Bethany heal
Malik
to the point where he would admit he loved them?

She sighed. Who was this man who had tricked her into marriage? For a long time she’d assumed he was so arrogant that he’d just assumed he would get his way. But perhaps it was something else entirely. Was it possible that he’d acted to hide a fear of losing something he wanted or needed?

Liana sensed she was on the verge of discovering a very important truth. She thought about
Malik’s
childhood and how desperately alone he’d been. She thought about
Iman
and her betrayal. Both had taught
Malik
not to depend on anyone but himself. He couldn’t risk making a mistake about relationships, so he no longer invested in them.

But didn’t he still have the same needs as other men?

Her fingers laced together in front of her waist and she drew in a deep breath. He was afraid of being rejected again. Of being offered something he needed to survive, then having it taken away. She would have to show him that she really was a safe haven for him, and that he never had to worry about being alone again.

“Why did you choose me?” she asked later that night when they were alone in bed. They’d just finished making love, and she lay in
Malik’s
arms, safe and content.

“You are my wife. It would be inappropriate for me to make love with anyone else.”

She smiled and touched his lower lip. “That’s not what I mean and you know it. Why did you marry me? You could have picked someone entirely different. Someone more appropriate.”

He settled back on the pillow and tucked his hand under his head. “You were the one I wanted,” he said. “At first there was just an attraction I hadn’t felt before, and I responded to that. Later, as I got to know you and your daughter, I realized you had all the characteristics necessary to make both a good queen and a good mother.”

He looked at her. “
Bethany
is a wonderful child. You love her deeply and would do anything to protect her. I wanted that for my children.”

She nodded. His words made sense. After all, look what had happened to him.

“Also,” he continued, “you weren’t impressed with the fact that I was a prince. I couldn’t imagine spending the rest of my life with someone in awe of me.”

“Instead you find yourself with someone who will always tell you exactly what she’s thinking.”

“I don’t mind. If I don’t agree with you, I simply won’t listen.”

She wanted to laugh, but she knew he was telling the truth. She thought about what he’d said about why he’d picked her. Was her being a good mother to
Bethany
also about her capacity to love? Had he chosen a woman with a big heart so that he could find a place for himself there?

She wanted to ask, but knew he wouldn’t answer.
At least not honestly.
Malik
kept his emotions firmly in check. However, she wasn’t like that. Her feelings spilled over, even when she didn’t want them to. Right now, she knew that while
Malik
might be arrogant and annoying at times, he’d somehow found that place he’d been looking for in her heart.

She’d figured out the truth that afternoon when she’d watched him with her daughter. Now she reached up and kissed his mouth. “I can’t imagine a world without you,
Malik
. I love you, and if you want me to stay with you, I will.”

She waited expectantly for his excited reaction. A smile hovered at the corners of her mouth.

But instead of whooping or gathering her close and beginning to make love with her, he simply nodded.

“I’m pleased,” he told her. “You’ve made the right decision. Except for telling my immediate family, there shouldn’t be any changes in our lives. We will have to talk about when we’re going to start our family. I would like to begin that process as soon as possible.”

He continued talking about children and a belated honeymoon and a ceremony to give her a title in her own right. Liana listened, but none of the words made sense. Instead she felt icy claws sliding all over her, and she couldn’t help shivering in response.

Had she been wrong about
Malik
? While she hadn’t expected a heartfelt declaration in return, she’d thought he would at least seem happy.

“Don’t you care?” she blurted out. “Doesn’t any of this matter to you?”

He frowned.
“Of course.
I told you I’m pleased.”

“Gee. If you’re pleased about this, imagine how excited you’ll be when the dry cleaning returns on time.”

He sat up in bed and looked at her. “Why are you upset? I want you to stay and you’re staying. We have details to discuss. If you would prefer we can talk about them later.”

“I don’t care when we talk about them,” she said, her voice thick with disappointment and anger. “I want you to be happy that I told you I love you. I want you to say you’re thrilled and pleased, and that you were afraid I would leave and you would be alone. I want to know
this matters
, that I’m not some interchangeable part in your life.”

“We have been over this before,” he said patiently. “You are my wife. I am your husband. I have great respect for you, and I have honored you by taking you as my future queen.”

She scrambled to her knees and glared at him. “Not good enough. I have given in on every point,
Malik
. I’ll live on your land and be your wife. I’ll learn the customs and raise our children to be good and wise rulers. But you and I don’t have an arrangement, we have a marriage. It’s not about duty and
position,
it’s about loving each other. You’ve won every single battle, but you’re not winning this one. I matter to you. I know it and you know it, and by God, you’re going to tell me.”