The Sunburnt Country (27 page)

DAN
arrived back at his mum’s house with a sense of excitement and familiarity, not the foreboding panic like last time. He noticed the little cement square beside the door with his and Cam’s fingerprints on it, saved from the old driveway. How could he ever imagine his mum had stopped caring?

He knocked once on the door before opening it a crack. ‘Hello?’

The house was full of light, glowing with warmth. They were all seated around the kitchen table and his mum stood up when he entered and threw her arms around him. Dan wondered whether she was still surprised he’d come back or whether she was just catching up on what she’d missed out on. Either way, he enjoyed the hugs.

‘Derek,’ Dan said as he shook his hand. His mother’s husband was all smiles and genuinely happy to see him, even if a little wary. He was shorter than John and had a round belly that said just how much he enjoyed life and his wife’s cooking. He wasn’t as handsome as John, his hair was receding and his face more lined but he exuded warmth.

‘It’s nice to see you again, Daniel. We’re so pleased that you’re here. You have no idea how much your mother has missed you. Come, sit.’

Derek pulled out a chair for Daniel before following Denise to the kitchen to help bring out the finger food, touching her lovingly as they went. Cam emerged from the kitchen behind them. Slightly shorter than Dan but with the same toned build, he was wearing jeans and a black Metallica T-shirt. He oozed gruffness.

‘Cam.’ Dan wanted to stretch out his hand but was scared of the frosty reception. ‘I’m really sorry about the other night. I want to make up for all the lost years. I never meant to abandon you. It was never my intention —’

Cam stepped closer, making Dan falter. His body automatically braced itself as Cam’s hand came towards him. But then it paused, waiting for his hand to shake it.

‘I’ve been talking with Mum – it seems like we all have bridges to mend,’ said Cam, as Dan shook his hand wholeheartedly.

‘Thanks, Cam. It really means a lot to me to have you all back in my life. I’m so sorry —’

‘Don’t,’ said Cam stepping back and waving for him to sit. ‘The past is the past, we can’t change it. But we can change our futures.’ Cam glanced at Denise. His thick dark eyebrows creased. ‘Mum helped me understand why you never came back. I often thought of finding you myself, I wasn’t afraid of Dad. But I guess I was a little scared you wouldn’t want to see me either. So much time had passsed and we’ve all got our own lives. Time just passed so quickly.’

‘I know. But thank you – this, us together, really means a lot.’

‘Come now, we’ve all cleared the air. How about we make up for lost time?’ said Denise, with a smile.

They say time really did heal some wounds and he knew it would help mend his family but did it also mean he could mend the wounds left from Jonelle? Sure he had been getting on with life these last few weeks but she was always there, in every heartbeat and in every thought. Even now, in his personal crisis, she was present. He could almost feel her strong grip holding his hand to settle his nerves. It didn’t help that the smell of grease seemed to follow him everywhere.

Throughout dinner they talked, repairing broken ties and forging stronger ones.

Cam talked excitedly about how he’d met Myree when she’d picked up the pliers he’d purposely dropped and about impending fatherhood. ‘I think we’re having a boy,’ he said proudly.

‘I can’t believe I’m going to be an uncle. It’s amazing.’ He swallowed hard.

‘I think it’s a girl. Myree is so tiny around the waist,’ said Denise. She was glowing, no doubt from having her boys together again. She was holding Derek’s hand, which was something he never saw his parents do. Not once did he remember seeing them snuggle on the couch or kiss each other lovingly.

Dan wondered what his life would have been like if he’d stayed with his mum. Would he be working in a bank or doing something different, like Cam was? Would he have married? But then he never would have met Jonelle. Maybe life had gone this way for a reason. Maybe he was supposed to meet Jonelle. Did she miss him like he missed her? He regretted their fight. If only he’d gone back and held her in his arms one more time. But would it have helped or just made his aching worse?

‘Hey, Cam, do you remember the race car we built with Uncle Darryl?’ Dan asked, trying to distract himself from thoughts of Jonelle. ‘Or were you too young?’

‘Of course not. I still have it. That’s why we are having a boy. I have plans,’ he said, followed by a cheeky smile.

‘For real? Cool, I’d love to see it again one day.’

Denise got up and started clearing away the empty plates and Derek helped, leaving the boys to chat.

‘Yeah? Come around anytime. You and I were always going to be V8 drivers, don’t you remember?’

‘Sure do. I miss it. Do you think we could go when the V8s come back to Perth?’ Dan asked with bated breath.

‘Well, a mate of mine races sprint cars at Kwinana Motorplex. He’s racing on the weekend. Do you want to go to that?’ Poor Cam looked as unsure as Dan felt. They were still skirting around each other, wary of being rejected.

‘Are you kidding? I would love to go.’ Dan couldn’t believe it. Cam was so settled, almost a husband and a father with a job he enjoyed. And where was Dan? Doing a job that didn’t excite him and pining after a woman who lived miles away in a drought-stricken remote town. How could the younger brother have everything together while Dan felt like his life was nowhere near perfect?

‘Brilliant.’ Cam’s smile was wide and genuine.

Derek sat back down and Cam asked if he wanted to join them.

‘No, you kids go and have fun. I’ll be busy with my mum, anyway.’ Derek scratched the top of his receding hairline and Dan saw the worry lines along his brow.

‘Is she all right?’ Dan asked. He liked Derek, he could see why his mum had married him. It was hard to dislike him when he made Denise so happy.

‘Yeah, she’s a tough old boot but she’s just upset about leaving her home. She needs care, people to keep an eye on her, and we both still work,’ he said, motioning to Denise.

‘You work, Mum?’ Denise had always been a stay-at-home mum. What work would she be doing now?

‘I help down at Derek’s workshop, taking calls, invoicing and whatnot,’ she said waving her hand.

He turned to Derek. ‘Workshop?’

‘Yeah, just a car repair shop. I don’t work as much as I used to. Leave that for the younger ones, but I still keep them on track.’

‘You’re a mechanic?’

‘Afraid so. Why? You have a problem with mechanics?’ Derek asked with a teasing tone.

‘Not at all. I think it’s great.’ He was, in fact, in love with a mechanic after all. Only he’d realised far too late just how quickly Jonelle had snuck into his heart and made herself at home there. How do you stop loving someone? When he’d heard from Zac a day after he’d arrived back, he’d resisted the urge to quiz him about Jonelle. Besides, Zac had been so happy to tell him about his hook-up with Renae. He hadn’t heard from him since, which he guessed meant he was busy entertaining his new girlfriend. He didn’t expect them to stay in touch. In reality they were so far apart. But if he came to the city Dan would make sure to take Zac out, no matter how much time had passed.

‘Who would like dessert?’ asked Denise. ‘I made sticky date pudding.’

Dan smiled. That had always been his favourite.

*

Dan spent the next week settling in to his new job, but the whole time he was distracted by his excitement for the forthcoming weekend. He was still nervous when he arrived at Cam’s house on Saturday. Had his brother changed his mind? Little fears played on Dan’s mind. But he shouldn’t have worried. Cam welcomed him into his home, showing him around and introducing him to Myree. ‘Your home is so nice, Myree,’ Dan said, as they stepped out the back into the yard. Their home was full of things they had collected over the years together and reminded him a little of the Baxters’ home. It was perfect to raise a family in. Cam even had a decent-sized backyard with a small shed filled with electrical stuff. ‘Myree doesn’t come in here. Said she’d likely get electrocuted in this mess. As if,’ said Cam with a chuckle.

Myree nudged Cam but she smiled sweetly. She looked tired, with bags under her eyes, and she must have noticed Dan studying her.

‘I’m suffering with the morning sickness still. I wish it would bugger off,’ she said.

Cam gave her belly a tender rub. ‘He’s just a bit unsettled in there.’

‘
She’s
just being a pain,’ Myree fired back.

‘It’s gonna be a boy.’ Cam winked at her and kissed her lips. ‘All right, we better go, honey. I’ll see ya later. Call me if you need.’

‘Have a good night. So nice to finally meet Cam’s older brother,’ said Myree. ‘You obviously got all the looks,’ she said, teasing Cam.

‘Maybe, but he’s got the girl.’

‘Oh and a charmer —’

‘Let’s go before this gets any worse,’ said Cam, laughing as he grabbed Dan’s arm.

On the drive to the speedway motorplex Dan studied Cameron. ‘You are very lucky, Cam. You’ve got it good.’

Cam snuck in a sideways glance. ‘Yep, I think so. Even better now.’

They shared a smile.

The motorplex was huge and nothing like the speedway at Narrogin. One side had the speedway circle track and on the other side was the drag car strip. People were already flowing in, looking for the best spot to sit.

Dan couldn’t help thinking about his own life in comparison to Cam’s. He was four years older than Cam and yet he had nothing in his life except a career. Did he want that? Right now he wanted what Cam had. His own family with the woman he loved and a warm home. He was so confused that he confessed as much to Cam after they were settled on the grass-covered steps off to one side of the racetrack.

‘I don’t know what my life’s about,’ he said, turning to Cam. ‘I don’t know if I like my job any more. Do you think that’s weird?’

Cam glanced at him, a dark eyebrow raised in question, one eye slightly squinted like always. ‘Not really. Stuffed if I’d be wearing a suit every day,’ Cam teased. ‘Why don’t you quit if it’s not what you want?’

‘I don’t know. I’m not sure what I want.’ Actually he was sure but she was too far out of reach. ‘What would I do?’

‘Whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy. What does make you happy?’ Cam asked curiously.

‘Jonelle,’ Dan replied.

‘That girl you couldn’t stop talking about from that town you were in?’

Dan laughed. ‘Yeah, that one. I can’t stop thinking about her.’

‘Maybe it’s love. Maybe you should go and give it a try, otherwise you might regret it your whole life. You can always get another bank job if things don’t work out. It’s not the end of the world.’

That made Dan grin. ‘But if I go back there what will I do?’

‘Does it matter? Dan, you can do whatever you want. Don’t pigeonhole yourself. Think outside the square. What things do you like doing? What gives you the greatest joy?’

Dan’s chest had swelled with pride and love. Cam had turned out to be such a strong, reliable and caring man, and Dan wondered how different he might have been if he hadn’t gone with his father all those years ago and if he had been raised by Derek and Denise instead.

‘I don’t care what you do, big bro, as long as you stay in touch. It’s nice having a brother around again. I’ve missed you.’ Cam bumped his shoulder against Dan’s.

Dan watched the next heat of cars drive out onto the track and slapped his hand on his leg. ‘Productions. These ones, these are what she races,’ he told Cam as the cars lined up. Dan enjoyed the racing but felt as if it was missing something and he knew exactly who that was.

His body zinged with nerves. Was this a good idea? Dan rode the elevator to the top of the imposing building. As the doors rattled open, he stepped towards the lady behind the corner desk. ‘Hi, Lynette. How are you?’

Lynette looked over the top of her black-rimmed glasses. Her silver-streaked hair was cut short, not a strand out of place. ‘Daniel. It’s been a while. Gosh, you look so brown.’

Dan smiled. ‘A bit of the bush sun will do that to you. Is John free?’ he asked.

Lynette glanced across to the large phone, lights lit across the top. ‘Sorry. He’s still on his call. Can I make you an appointment?’ Lynette had her fingers poised at the keyboard.

‘Um, no. I might just wait, if that’s okay.’ Dan turned and sat on one of the grey chairs against the wall. He felt like he was waiting for an interview instead of a quick visit with his dad.

‘He shouldn’t be much longer,’ said Lynette, before turning back to her typing.

Dan clenched his hands together as his left foot began to bounce. He hadn’t been looking forward to this at all. Could he live back out there full-time? He already knew the answer to that. There was something alluring about the vast sunburnt country and wide-open skies of Bundara, and the people. Especially the people. One in particular. He’d made the decision late Saturday night after he’d got back from the motorplex with Cam. He’d realised he cared more for Jonelle than he cared for his job. He thought back to the last time he’d seen her, when she’d asked him to stay. His heart had wanted to but his mind had said he had a new job to get back to. But after being with his family and talking with Cam, Dan worked out what meant the most to him. Right now he needed to know if he and Jonelle could make it work. Cam was right, he would regret it if he didn’t. He was sure she was the one.

‘Dan,’ Lynette called, tearing him from his thoughts. ‘He’s free now.’

Dan stood and headed to his father’s door. ‘Thanks, Lynette.’ He knew he must have looked a little panicked.

Dan knocked, then opened the door. ‘John?’

John dropped his pen and sat up. ‘Daniel. Come in, come in. Sit.’ Dan sat in the chair opposite his father’s oak desk. ‘To what do I owe this pleasure?’

Dan cringed. It wasn’t going to be a pleasure for long. Clearing his throat and willing himself to stop wringing his hands, he sat forward. ‘Um, I just thought I’d let you know before you heard it from anyone else that I’ve handed in my resignation.’