The Sweetest Love (Love Conquers All Book 5) (2 page)

“Hi baby,” the older woman smiled as she felt a light, butterfly kiss land on her smooth cheek.

“How’s my sugar?” Nelson West asked, wrapping his arms around his wife’s waist as she stood at the sink washing collard greens.

A wave of grief flowed through Brenda. She tried her best to disguise her sadness. “I’m doing alright sweetheart. How about you?”

Disengaging his hold from his wife’s body, Nelson leaned against the sink and stared at his wife of thirty-eight years. After all these years they continued to do this little dance. Continued to try and be strong for the other.

Rubbing his hands over his short, cropped salt and pepper hair, he let out a deep sigh. “It doesn’t get any easier. Does it?”

Brenda’s voice came out in a hushed quiver. “No, it doesn’t.”

Wiping her hands on her apron and taking two short steps in his direction, she laid her head on his chest. Without hesitation, Nelson embraced his wife, the mother of his children. When her body trembled with silent tears, he held her tighter, rubbing callused, soothing hands up and down her back.

“I know baby. I know.”

“I miss her so much,” Brenda muffled into his chest as tears soaked his shirt.

“So do I, baby.”

For several minutes the grieving parents held each other like they always did on this day. Very few words were ever needed as they allowed their love to apply a healing balm to their hurting souls.

Stepping back, Brenda wiped her eyes before giving Nelson a tender kiss on his lips as she returned to her task of cleaning greens.

“You will never believe who came by to see me today.”

Going over to the refrigerator to grab a bottled water, Nelson threw over his shoulder, “Who?”

“Roxy.”

Twisting the cap off the bottle, a smile touched his lips. “How is she? We haven’t seen her in forever.”

“Roxy is doing well. She finally took that test and got a new job with an investment firm.” She didn’t mention it was a small firm as Roxy had made a point of stressing. Small firm, big firm… it didn’t matter to Brenda because she was just as proud of Roxy as if she’d landed a job on Wall Street.

“Good for her,” Nelson said as he pulled a chair back from the kitchen table and sat down. He always thought Roxanna was a sweet child. He never minded when she came over to play with Abigail. He and Brenda had been thrilled when her mother needed someone to watch her on the weekends. Having her around is what helped Abigail to feel like a normal child.

Many children didn’t have the patience for Abigail. They found her pushy and overly spoiled, but not Roxanna. The two became fast friends when they were nine years old and in the fourth grade.

Being the new girl at school, Roxy was quiet and painfully shy; a magnet for bullies. When Tasha Green, the biggest and oldest girl in the class, attempted to take Roxy’s new Snoopy watch she’d gotten for her birthday, it was Abigail who stood up to the bully.

“You better leave her alone before I get my big brother on you!” Abigail West threatened, her fist balled up and tiny body trembling in anger, resembling a second grader rather than a fourth grader.

The friendship started off at a snail’s pace. Roxanna was initially intimidated by Abigail’s sometimes moody behavior. Some days she would be very talkative, engaging the shy child, making her giggle as she imitated their science teacher’s nasally voice. Other days she’d seem cranky as she complained about having another belly ache.

Whenever Abby became moody because she wasn’t feeling well, Roxy would simply give her space. But when Abigail’s health relapsed and she wasn’t able to attend school, it was Roxy who volunteered to take Abby her homework assignments every day.

Usually when Roxy showed up to drop off the homework packets, Brenda would meet her at the door to accept them. One particular day, however, Nelson had answered the door. “Go on up to her room. I think Abby would like to see you.”

The moment Roxy entered the room she noticed Abby was terribly sad.

“What’s wrong, Abby?” Roxanna whispered, fearful she might upset her.

Abby glanced at her friend. She missed going to school and being in class with Roxy every day. Her mom told her it would be some time before she could go back to school. She just wanted to be like other kids. She was tired of always having to go to doctor appointments and sometimes having to stay in the hospital when she got really sick. Now on top of not feeling well, she didn’t understand her math homework.

Poking out her bottom lip, she complained, “I don’t understand how to do fractions. They’re hard.”

No way was she going to ask Adam for help. He would just tease her about how much of a baby she was who couldn’t do anything.

Roxy’s face lit up as she smiled at Abby. Taking timid steps she sat down next to Abby on the white canopy bed covered with a pretty lavender frilly quilt. Rubbing her hand across the soft covering, Roxanna softly said, “I like fractions. I can help you learn how to do them.”

“For real?” Abby questioned, her voice filled with happiness as she smiled for the first time that day.

Bobbing her head up and down, Roxy said, “Uh-huh, I just have to make sure it’s okay with my mom. I’m supposed to go straight home after I drop off your homework.”

“Do you think your mom will let you?” Abigail asked, her smile dwindling. The last time she had a friend come over they suddenly stopped. When she asked her mother why, Brenda had sadly said, “Linda’s mother thinks you’re too sick to play with her.”

Jumping down off the bed, Roxy kneeled next to her book bag she’d dropped on the floor before climbing up on the bed. She continued to talk as she rummaged through her book bag in search of Abby’s homework folder. “I think she will. I hope she will, so I don’t have to stay at home by myself until she gets in from work.”

Grabbing hold of the orange folder, she yanked it out her bag and handed it to Abby. “I have to go. My mom will be calling me soon to make sure I’m home. I’ll ask her. Okay?”

“Okay. I hope she says yes.”

“Me too.” Roxanna smiled at Abigail as she slung the book bag over her shoulder. Waving, she said, “Bye, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye, see you tomorrow,” Abby mumbled, sad to see Roxy leave. Most kids might have found it fun being home all day watching cartoons. Abigail, however, found it downright boring.

Nelson smiled to himself as he remembered overhearing the little girls’ conversation as he stood outside the door with a tray of brownies and milk.

From that day forward the two had become as close as Siamese twins. Nelson and Brenda had been so grateful Reba hadn’t been as ignorant, insensitive, and narrow-minded as the other parents when they openly shared Abby’s medical condition.

Reba had responded with tears in her eyes when the Wests told her Abby had contracted the Hepatitis C virus from a blood transfusion at the tender age of two years old. The toddler had suffered a ruptured spleen after the family had been hit head on by a drunk driver. The car seat was faulty and hadn’t protected Abby as the manufacturer claimed.

By the time Abby was five years old she’d begun showing signs of liver damage from the virus. And by the time Roxy came into her life Abby was a very sick little girl.

“What are you thinking about?” Brenda questioned as she began to cut the greens.

“Just about how sweet Roxy was as a child. If it hadn’t been for her our Abby wouldn’t have had much of a childhood,” Nelson reflected.

“Mmm, I know.” Smirking and shaking her head, “Lord have mercy those two used to get into so much trouble.”

Nelson chuckled. “Yeah, that Abby was always talking Roxy into something.”

Brenda stopped her cutting and leaned against the sink. Shaking her head again, a smile touched her lips. “Remember the time they called Adam’s girlfriend pretending to be another girl?”

Nelson laughed. “That boy was ready to skin them alive.”

“Uh-huh. I’m sorta glad they did play that prank on that little fast tail girl.” Brenda said sucking her teeth.

Laughing again, he reminded her, “You thought all his girlfriends were fast.”

“Well, they were,” Brenda threw over her shoulder as she picked the knife back up and begin cutting again.

Taking a swallow of water, Nelson asked, “Did Adam see Roxy?”

“Yeah, he let her in while I was back here in the kitchen.” Placing the greens in a pot, Brenda went on to tell her husband how Roxy was fine, chatting up a storm until Adam came into the kitchen.

Although he had only come in to let her know he was leaving, the short period of time he was in Roxy’s presence, she’d become quiet, and avoided making eye contact with him.

“I guess she still remembers how Adam used to treat her.” Nelson rubbed a large palm down his face. “I never knew he had so much resentment inside of him.”

Brenda finished putting the greens in the pot, added a small amount of water and the few strips of bacon she’d fried along with a little of the drippings for seasoning, then took a seat next to her husband. Taking his hand in hers, she softly agreed, “I know. I had no idea how much he resented Abby until he took his anger out on Roxy that night.” Brenda took a deep breath, than let it out slowly. “I didn’t realize we were neglecting him.”

Brenda gently squeezed his large hands. “It’s just that Abby was so sick,” she softly whispered. Guilt consumed her for so many years. She loved both of her children dearly. However, Abby had always seemed to need their attention, their affection the most.

Adam had been the strong one. He never complained as his parents focused all their attention on his baby sister. Whenever his plans had to be altered because Abby had a doctor’s appointment, suddenly became sick, or wasn’t feeling well, Adam would quietly accept it. Never once had he rebelled or lashed out until that evening as a teenager.

“Baby, you have no idea how much it killed me when Adam broke down and accused us of loving Abby more than him,” Nelson confessed as he tenderly rubbed the pad of his thumb over her knuckles.

Adam’s angry blow-up that night forced Brenda and Nelson to deal with the illness which had begun to gradually eat away at their family. They hadn’t realized both of their children were slowly dying, one from a physical ailment, and the other from an emotional one.

That night after Nelson had gone after Roxy and the kids had gone to bed, he and his wife decided the family needed some sort of intervention. The next morning Brenda had contacted the church’s secretary to set up counseling sessions with the pastor.

Just three short months later, Abby had succumbed to her illness.

Roxy could feel the tears stinging her eyes as she parked her car. Gathering up her purse and shopping bag from the passenger seat, she got out of the vehicle. Taking slow steps, she wondered if the tightening in her chest would ever get better whenever she came here.
Probably not,
she sadly thought, swallowing the lump in her throat.

She didn’t focus on any of the grieving families she passed, her pain was too deep. Every time she came, it didn’t get any better. But she had to come, she told herself.

Reaching up she wiped away the tear that slid down her cheek. Her lips trembled as she managed a sad smile. The engraved smiling picture of Abigail West on the pink headstone tugged at her heart.

Why did you have to leave me?
It was a question Roxy had asked herself almost every day for the last sixteen years. She hadn’t understood it as a ten year old child and she still didn’t understand it as a twenty-six-year old woman.

Taking off her shoes, Roxy sat down on the lush grass and got comfortable. She was going to be here for a while.

Leaning forward, she tenderly ran her hand over her best friend’s face. As the tears rolled down her face unchecked, she closed her eyes. “I miss you so much, Abby.”

This day, the anniversary of her death, was always hard. Roxy had just finished baking cupcakes with her mom to take to the hospital when Mr. West called to give the bad news. This had hurt worse than the time when she was eight years old and her mother had tracked her father down at her urging, only to have him refuse to see her.

“I miss you, too, Foxy Roxy,”
she could hear Abby say. Roxy giggled through her tears remembering the childhood nickname her friend had given her.

Wiping her face with the back of her hands, she reached into the shopping bag. She just knew Abby would love Sasha the Bratz doll.

Abby’s hobby and love had been collecting dolls. So every time she came to visit her friend she never came empty handed.

“I got something for you.” Roxy posed the doll with its hand propped up against the headstone. She laughed and didn’t care if the people walking by thought she was crazy. The doll looked so sassy, just like her friend.

Her laughter fading, she began talking to her friend. She had so much to tell her.

Roxy let out a deep breath. “Well, Bruce dumped me. It did hurt a little because I really did like him. But I wasn’t ready to sleep with him.” Rolling her eyes and sucking her teeth as if Abby was right next to her, she huffed, “He had a nerve to give me an ultimatum. Can you believe that fool?” She hunched her shoulders nonchalantly. “So, while we were out to dinner, I ordered all this food and pretended I had to go to bathroom.” Pausing, she smiled at the elderly woman who stopped to give her a quizzical stare. As the woman eased a few feet past her, she picked up where she’d left off. “And I never went back to the table. I took a cab home. He’s gone… out of my life.”

She giggled as she imagined Abby giving her a high five and saying, “That’s what he gets! Good for you, Foxy Roxy!”

She reached inside the bag, this time pulling out lavender roses – Abby’s favorite color – and placed them next to Sasha. “I finally got a full time job with benefits and everything.”

Roxy spent the next twenty minutes living in her own fantasy world where it was just she and Abby. In this world Abby was always vibrant, beautiful and healthy. And she always listened intently as Roxy poured out her heart.

Although Roxy had made a few friends as she went on to high school and college, none had every replaced Abby. When she really needed to vent it was always to her mom or Abby. Of course she knew her friend was no longer there to give her advice, but it always made her feel better knowing and believing Abby was watching over her from heaven and somehow guiding her in the right direction.

“I went by to see your mom and dad today. But your dad wasn’t home.” Oh God why did she have to say that? She was doing just fine. She had stopped her crying and now she was about to start up again.

“She really misses you,” she whispered, wiping another tear away. The visit had been a rough one for both of them as they remembered their loved one. They had held each other and cried for what seemed like forever. Over the years she had remained in contact with Mr. and Mrs. West. It was her way of always feeling connected to Abby.

Roxy’s heart ached for Brenda. She knew Brenda only went to her daughter’s grave twice a year, on her birthday and the anniversary of her death. And each time she had to work herself up to go because the pain was just so great. Roxy still could hear the wails of the woman as they lowered her child’s body into the ground.

Struggling not to completely lose her composure, she decided to change the subject to something she knew wouldn’t make her cry. “I saw your brother today.”

Plucking up a blade of grass, she twirled it between her fingers. She didn’t want to admit seeing him again after all these years had stirred something up in her other than the pain she felt from his cruelness to her all those years ago.

“I hadn’t seen him since your…” she let her words drift off. She couldn’t bear to say the F word. “Well, it’s been a long time.”

Yes, it had been a long time and he had morphed into one handsome specimen. Well handsome or not, he in her eyes was still a mean jerk and she wasn’t going to spend one more second talking about him.

Checking her watch, she noticed it was almost four; Roxy was sure the Wests were probably on their way to the gravesite.

“Well, I gotta go Crabby Abby,” she said as she picked up her pumps. “Your mom and dad should be here soon.” Kissing her fingertips she touched the image of Abby’s face. “I love you.”

Sniffling and lifting her hand to wipe away a tear, a smile curved her lips. In her heart she could hear her friend’s childhood voice.
“I love you, too, Foxy Roxy.”

Putting on her pumps, she gathered up her purse and empty shopping bag and stood up. Shoving her things under one arm, she brushed dirt and grass from her skirt. Closing her eyes, she said the prayer she always said before leaving the gravesite.
Thank you Lord, for giving me Abby. Even if it was for only a little while.