The Telling (11 page)

“I’m sorry.” It was so softly spoken that Jay scarcely heard it.

“For what?” He stopped pacing to look at Michael, guilt mounting when he noticed how small and lost the man looked—not an
easy feat for someone so large.

“For keeping you away from the party and setting you at odds with Terry, for what nearly happened. I didn’t mean to be issuing or
accepting any kind of invitation. At least, not to him.”

Jay chose to ignore the mumbled afterthought, though the comment renewed the knife-in-his-gut-being-twisted feeling. He had no claim to Michael, as much as
he might wish otherwise. Finally, he sighed and asked, “Why should you apologize to me? Like he said, it was your choice to make.” Even
if that choice knotted Jay’s guts and made him want to rip Terry’s head from his shoulders.

“I didn’t intend for him to follow me in here. We were dancing and I got thirsty. Next thing I know, there he is. I never realized that
he’d see anything as an offer. It’s not him I wanted, anyway,” Michael blurted, shocked expression betraying that he
hadn’t intended to say that aloud.

The remark, coupled with Michael’s earlier comment, caused Jay’s hold on his jealousy to slip. So there was someone Michael wanted.
Well, that was just too bad because he knew everyone at the house tonight and had no intention of sucking it up while whoever it was paraded Michael around
like a prize, taunting Jay with what he couldn’t have. “Oh, yeah?” he sneered. “Well, maybe you should tell me just
who it is and I’ll tell you what’s wrong with them and why you should stay the hell away from them.”

He never expected to hear, “You, Jay. I want you.”

Jay quickly hid his shock as their conversation was again interrupted. Only, this time, the invading revelers didn’t seem to want to leave and it
was all Jay could do not to scream at them to get out.

He and Michael needed to talk. They couldn’t use his room, that would be too obvious and, knowing Danny, his roommate, it was probably occupied.
There was too much of a chance for interruptions on the porch, so that left only one other choice for a private venue. Grabbing Michael by the arm, Jay
pulled him out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

***

“There,” Jay said, releasing his death grip on Michael’s wrist. “Now we can talk.”

Glaring lights flooded the bathroom and Michael blinked hard, adjusting to the sudden brightness. He heard, rather than saw, the door close and the lock
engage.

“Look, dude, are you playing me?”

“Playing? What the hell are you talking about, Jay?” What had he done? Surely he hadn’t misread Jay’s interest? The
kitchen confession had taken every bit of Michael’s nerve. Jay was supposed to be happy, damn it, and kissing him into oblivion, not questioning
his motives.

Arm braced against the wall by Michael’s head, Jay growled, “Wanna know what it’s like with another man? Are you just
satisfying your curiosity before you run back, safe and sound, to your little straight world? I know I promised whatever you needed, but if
you’re hunting someone to experiment with and aren’t really particular about the who, then you’ve come to the wrong
place.”

“No, it’s not like that.” Michael hadn’t fully recovered from his earlier adrenaline overload and, though he knew
deep down that Jay wouldn’t hurt him, a tendril of fear crept up his spine.

Jay’s expression became less frightening, although an undercurrent of anger remained. Voice somewhat calmer, he asked, “Well then tell
me, Michael. What is it like?”

Seeking the right words to redeem himself, all that came out was, “I’m gay.”

If eyes were the windows to the soul, his were a pair of sliding glass doors, no curtain in sight. His deepest, darkest thoughts had nowhere to hide as
Jay’s gaze bored into his, exposing every secret. Without warning Jay swooped in and delivered a brutal kiss. Michael’s cock grew
instantly hard.

Jay pulled away, reaching down and squeezing the engorged flesh. Michael moaned, welcoming the unexpected contact. Jay jumped back as if burned.
“You really aren’t playing, are you?”

Michael shook his head.

Jay’s expression grew unreadable, but at least it wasn’t angry. “Sorry,” he whispered. “I
didn’t mean to do that.”

Michael closed his eyes and let out a held breath. If he looked at Jay now he’d be too unnerved to speak, and there were things that desperately
needed to be said. “It’s okay,” he said, willing Jay’s hand to return and finish what it started. Maybe it was time
for a little blunt honesty. “It’s not like I haven’t been leading you on.”

Jay no longer accused Michael but defended him. “No, it’s not okay. I knew how things were for you, how they are. I pushed. When you
caught me off guard like that out on the porch, I dared to get my hopes up. Why didn’t you tell me you were gay?”

Michael opened his eyes to stare at their reflections in the mirror hanging over the sink, heart beating so loudly Jay had to hear the steady thudding.
“I’m not out and planned on leaving this God-forsaken place before that ever happened.”

Jay opened and closed his mouth a few times, but nothing emerged. Finally he asked, “You’re not out to anyone? Not even your
family?”

Michael shrugged. “Mom knows.”

“But not Angie?”

“I plan on telling her, I just haven’t had the chance. Besides, she’s too busy with school right now and would only make a
big fuss over me.” Not to mention meddle in his life, fixing him up with every eligible gay male she’d even remotely heard of and
badgering him incessantly about his love life.

“That’s true,” Jay agreed. “I still can’t believe she doesn’t know. Y’all seem to be
so close.”

Michael loved his sister, but now was not the time for discussing her. Now was the time to get back to the kissing and groping. He pushed aside his
body’s demands long enough to explain, “We are, but I’m just coming to terms with this myself. And, like I said, I
didn’t intend to come out here.”

“Then why did you? As far as I know everyone thinks you’re straight. Why jeopardize that, especially if you plan on leaving?”

In answer, Michael leaned in and locked their mouths together, pouring every bit of his desire and longing into the kiss. Slowly he pulled away and leaned
back against the wall, saying with his eyes what he couldn’t say with words.

“Me. You came out for me,” Jay said quietly. It wasn’t a question.

“Yes. I told you downstairs who I wanted.”

They stood gazing at each other for a long moment before Jay replied, “I’ll accept that. But I have to ask you this, and you can tell
me it’s none of my business if you want, but had you ever kissed a man before tonight?”

“No.” It seemed he was doing okay with honesty, so Michael stuck with what worked.

It stopped working. “That’s what I thought. Look, you’re obviously dealing with some pretty heavy shit tonight and I took
advantage of that. I’m no better than Terry. I just hope I haven’t ruined our friendship by pushing.”

“Don’t you dare go noble on me now.” Michael shut Jay up the best way he knew how. Heart hammering and his few remaining
inhibitions screaming at him to run, he tilted his head and sealed their lips together, effectively crossing the point of no return.

Kissing Jay was different from kissing a girl, the unfamiliar tickle of whiskers a reminder that Michael was, in fact, kissing a man. Kissing Jay. It was
exciting beyond his wildest dreams. No girl had ever made him feel like this.

If he were going to Hell the least he could do was enjoy the ride. When a low moan escaped he wondered who’d made it, then decided it
didn’t matter. Jay’s rigid body gradually relaxed.

Abruptly Jay stepped back, panting hard. “How many fingers am I holding up?”

“Two.”

“Well, you’re not drunk.” A soft smile played across his lips. He studied Michael with a critical eye and then stretched out
one hand. Expression solemn, he said, “If that’s how you truly feel, and you mean it when you say you want me, then allow me to escort
you from your closet.”

Michael placed his hand palm-down on Jay’s. Tugging gently, Jay forced him to take a step forward, then another, smile widening with each step.
When they were finally pressed body to body, Michael drew a quick breath, only to exhale forcefully as teeth and lips descending on his sensitive throat.
Jay pushed him back against the wall.

“Oh, God!” Michael moaned, lost in indescribable feelings, cock pressed painfully hard against the front seam of his jeans.
He’d only had one sexual experience with another man, but that had been enough for him to know what he’d been missing with girls. That
experience, eye-opening as it was, paled in comparison to Jay.

Uncertain of where to put his hands, he finally relaxed and did what came naturally, wrapping both arms around Jay and grasping the man’s firm
ass. When it came down to it, Michael’s body knew what it wanted. He surrendered conscious thought to instinct, moaning and revisiting the
wonderful rubbing that had started on the porch. Jay matched Michael’s height, muscles standing out on his arms. Michael could grab and squeeze
and even bite without worrying about hurting him. And they were alone, no one would ever know what went on in this little room unless one of them told. The
last of Michael’s resistance fell. Who knew the freedom letting go? Who cared about what might happen next week, tomorrow, or even in an hour?

It felt good, it felt right, and Michael didn’t want the pleasure stop. So caught up in feeling, the words spoken softly against his skin nearly
didn’t register. “Oh God. I’ve waited so long for this.” Other unintelligible encouragements were drowned out by
moans as Jay introduced Michael to places that he didn’t know could excite him so.

“Tell me you want me, tell me you’ll let me…” Michael froze, shocked back into reality. He wasn’t ready
to be on the receiving end, and hadn’t even considered the possibility so early in the game.

Pounding on the door shattered the moment. “Hey, man. You’ve been in there long enough. Others are waaaaiiiitttting!”
shrilled a slightly slurred voice.

Placing a fingertip against Michael’s lips, Jay called out, “Dude, trust me on this one. You don’t want to come into this
room anytime in the near future. It was two for one burrito night at the Taco Palace.” He smiled and winked at Michael, still held captive in his
embrace. “Try the downstairs bathroom.”

Profanity and rude comments followed the sound of boots stomping down the stairs. How had Michael missed footsteps climbing up the uncarpeted wooded
stairs? Jay remained motionless, listening at the door.

Jay spoke again, words little more than a husky murmur, “I was going to say ‘Let me show you how good it can be.’”

Michael suddenly couldn’t breathe.

Jay saved him from his own misunderstanding. “No, Michael, I didn’t mean
that
. I’ve no intention of doing anything
you’re uncomfortable with. This is all new to you. Let’s take it slow, there’s no hurry. I only want to do what
you’re ready for.

“What are you ready for, Michael?” Jay brushed his lips against Michael’s forehead. Incredibly aroused and unable to speak,
Michael merely nodded, hoping Jay understood. White teeth flashed against dark skin. “Stop me if I push too far.” Words became
unnecessary.

Michael pushed down his reservations, trusting Jay to stop if asked. He opened his mouth, tasting beer and pizza on Jay’s tongue.

Jay pulled back far enough to breathe against his lips, “Is this okay?” as his hands left Michael’s shoulders to wander
downward. A shudder of anticipation rocked Michael, and he nodded again, oxygen-deprived brain lacking resources for a verbal response. Nimble fingers
freed his shirt buttons, pushing the thin material open and off of his shoulders to pool on the floor at their feet.

Those long fingers fluttered over his chest as Jay’s mouth sought his once again to deliver a nerve-searing, less frantic kiss. With the press of
tongue to tongue, Michael found acceptance—acceptance that they would be lovers, it was no longer a question of ‘if.’

Jay rubbed the dusky nubs of Michael’s nipples, causing them to stiffen. Michael moaned and arched his back, begging for more. When rubbing
turned to gentle pinching, he nearly came.

Together they made short work of the button and zipper of his jeans, and then Jay slipped a brown, long-fingered hand through the opening and into
Michael’s boxers. A heated gaze met Michael’s own. Pulse pounding in his ears, he nodded his permission to continue.

He dropped his head back and closed his eyes in bliss, giving himself over to his partner. Familiar with his own touch and with the smaller hands of
females, Jay’s stroking was unlike anything he’d felt before, even that night with Ryan. Strong fingers wrapped expertly around his
cock, applying just the right amount of pressure, worlds away from the awkward fumbling of Ruth Ann. Here was someone who knew what a hand job felt like,
who understood firsthand how to give and receive pleasure.

Oh shit, what and I doing?
Michael stared down at his cock, firmly caught in another man’s hand, crossing a line that he couldn’t be re-crossed if things got
difficult. That time with Ryan came totally out of the blue—this was no accident.

“Shhh… Michael. Relax and enjoy. Let go, I’ve got you.”

The murmured encouragements and sultry smile were his undoing. Damn, but Jay’s easy confidence was sexy. After so many years of trying to be
strong, be a hero, and hold it all together, allowing someone else control came as a relief.

Jay pulled him closer, urging his head onto a wide shoulder. Pressure building, Michael’s muscles trembled, the fluttery feeling in his belly and
groin marking the beginnings of a climax. He couldn’t hold out much longer, though he fought to make it last.

“Jay,” he pleaded, “please don’t stop.”

Warm breath washed over his neck, sending cold chills racing along his body. A faint, “You sure?” came from a million miles away.

He answered with a thrust of his hips, a silent plea for more. Jay answered, working him faster and kissing him, muffling desperate moans.