The Voyeur Next Door (29 page)

I shifted uncomfortably. “Oh, um, I don’t think so. I’m just going to get these to Tamara and head home.”

“Are you sure? Because I have a spare ticket and it’s a free meal. Plus I would really like for you to join me. As friends,” he added quickly. “I know you’re seeing someone so I’ll be a perfect gentleman.”

I looked down at the flowers. “I’m not, actually. We’re not together anymore.”

I had to give Carl credit, he almost managed not to look gleeful at the news.

“Well, in that case, I insist.”

The smart thing to do would have been to decline, gone home, got out of those shoes, and gone to bed. I even considered it before I realized I actually did want to go, not because it was a free meal, I didn’t care about that, but because I was never invited to things. I never got invited to dances or parties. I was kind of curious to see what a high school after party was like.

“All right.”

He wrote down the address of the banquet hall the party would be held at on the back of one of his cards and promised to meet me there before hurrying off. I slipped the card into my purse and turned to ask Earl, or Lydia where I could find Tamara, but everyone was gone, except Gabriel. I hated the cold swirl of guilt that twisted through me. There was no reason for it. He let me walk away. I was allowed to move on.

“Are you waiting for me?” I wondered.

He unfurled his massive frame out of his seat and towered drastically over me. His gray eyes burned into me with an intensity that made my knees weak.

“Mom didn’t want you to get lost.”

“Oh.” I nodded slowly. “Thank you.”

He said nothing, but turned on his heels and started down the empty aisle towards the doors. I followed.

“Are you going to the party?” I asked, mostly to make conversation.

“No.”

He didn’t elaborate and I didn’t push.

The crowd was directed into the gymnasium. I supposed it was because it was the only place large enough to hold everyone. The noise level was deafening. Everyone was shrieking and laughing and congratulating each other on a job well done. Most of the children were still in their costumes. Gabriel’s family stood tucked away in a far corner, surrounding Tamara who looked flushed and happy in her swan costume. She spotted me and gave a little squeal of joy as she bounded over and took the flowers.

“How did you know?” she gushed, hugging the roses to her chest.

I laughed. “A little birdy told me.”

She grinned. “Thanks for coming and the kick ass costume. It was so much better than
she who shall not be named
.”

Chuckling, I inclined my head. “Happy I could help, and you were amazing out there.”

Cheeks darkening with pleasure, gray eyes rolled heaven ward dramatically. “I know. I rocked it.” She sobered and met my gaze. “So are you coming to the party?”

I nodded. “Yup.”

“Awesome. I wasn’t sure if Gabe asked you, or not.”

It was just another hard punch in the gut.

“Carl Doray asked me,” I said, barely masking the pain gouging into my chest.

A look of confusion twisted Tamara’s glittery face. Her gaze shot past me to where her brother stood talking to their mother.

“Gabe didn’t ask you?”

It was getting harder to speak, but I managed a sharp jerk of my head.

“That’s so weird,” she mused. “He’s the one who asked for two tickets. I guess I just assumed one was for you.”

Or someone else.

“You know what? I’m going to head out and get there before all the parking spots are taken.” I cut a smile across my face that contradicted the swelling knot in my chest. “I’ll see you there, okay? Again, great job!”

With a wave, I slipped into the crowd and hurried to the doors. My heels cracked a little too furiously through the empty hallway all the way to the main doors. I hit the stairs going down at a jog, holding tight to the iron railing.

Once outside, I stopped on the sidewalk and sucked in the night. I stared at the sky and willed myself to pull my shit together. I was an adult, for god sakes, not a teenager. The world would not cease spinning because of some guy. I would be fine.

I would be.

I had to be.

Fueled by a new surge of determination, I marched to my car. My keys jingled in the silence as I fished them out of my purse. I got in behind the wheel and followed the address eight blocks to a Taj Mahal style hall with beautiful ivory columns and marble domes that seemed to glow in the evening. Inside, the walls were lined with vivid oil paintings and the floor was a pathway of brightly colored cut glass. People were already there, making their way into a wide, lavish chamber made entirely of glass that opened to the night. It made the space seem endless and almost magical. Round tables circled the room, draped in white cloth and topped with a single white candle that flickered with all the movement around it. Fine china decorated each place setting and held a single nametag.

I inwardly swore. Whose name did I look for? Carl’s?

“Do you need help finding your name?” A short, thin man in white trousers and a long silk top appeared at my elbow. He smiled kindly and held up a clipboard. “Your name?”

“I don’t think I’m on there,” I confessed. “I was asked at the last minute.”

“Then your friend’s name?”

“Carl Doray?” I peered over his shoulder as he scanned his table chart and blinked when I spotted my name. “There.” I pointed. “That’s me.”

The man beamed. “The Pierce family. They are—”

“Oh, I’m not with them,” I said, immediately feeling horrible. “I mean, I’m very fond of them, but I—”

“Ali!” Carl jogged up to us, digging into the inside pocket of his coat. “Sorry I’m late. I have our tickets here.”

The man took the three purple tickets and peered them over before consulting his charts.

“Here we are,” he said at last. “This way.”

“Where’s Alyssa?” I asked, noticing the girl’s absence.

Carl chuckled as he guided us after the seater. “She’s driving with her friends. They should be here soon.”

Our table was in the front row next to the wide open space reserved for dancing. It was also fairly close to the stage where a band was setting up. My head spiked and no music was even playing.

“Here you are.”

The man pulled out my seat for me and waited until I was seated before nudging me under the table.

“Thank you.”

Inclining his head, he hurried away to help someone else, leaving me alone with Carl.

“This place is breathtaking,” he said, sliding into the chair next to mine. “I’ve never been here before. Have you?”

I shook my head and peered down at the neat little card in my plate. “Who’s Stacey?”

Carl grimaced and snatched the name tag from me. “My wife … ex-wife. Alyssa’s mom.”

“Is she not coming?”

Carl eyed the gold, loopy font. “She was supposed to, but I haven’t seen her.”

“So there’s a chance she could just show up in the middle of the meal and demand her seat back?” I only half teased.

He shook his head. “It’s unlikely. She tends to forget things, like the play.”

I gasped. “She didn’t come to watch Alyssa’s play?”

“She said she would, but like I said, she forgets.”

I couldn’t even wrap my head around that.

“How do you forget your only daughter’s play?”

Carl merely shrugged. “It’s one of the reasons we’re no longer together.”

“I’m sorry.”

He waved away my sympathies. “Let’s not talk about that. Tell me how you’ve been. The last time we talked, you were on the hunt for a missing teenager.”

I laughed and told him about my adventures through the woods with Gabriel, leaving out the part about finding out that my boss was also my secret fantasy lover. I honestly wasn’t sure how to work that one into the conversation. So I opted to leave it out.

“You know, I have never met such a diligent and loyal employee before,” Carl mused. “You’re always there for them.”

“It’s Earl,” I only half lied. “He makes me feel like family. Plus, I like Tamara. She’s … interesting.”

“And Gabriel?”

I couldn’t help it. My gaze dropped to my plate.

“We have a complicated relationship,” I mumbled.

“Were you together?”

I thought about Q, but even then, we were never really
together
.

I shook my head.

“But you love him.”

It was said so evenly, like it couldn’t possibly be anything else.

“No!” I blurted a little too fast. “Definitely not.”

Carl scrutinized my face until I wanted to snap at him to knock it off. I wasn’t a damn book. But he merely shrugged and sat back.

“If you say so, but I will tell you this, if I had someone like you on my team, I would—”

Alyssa arrived with an entourage of giggling girls still in their Swan Lake costumes. Alyssa was the only one in black and the one heading the group. She spotted me and her expression went from
I just won an Emmy
to
what the fuck is this shit
in the span of two seconds.

“What’s she doing here?”

“Alyssa.” Carl gave his daughter a frown that clearly warned her not to go there.

“That’s Mom’s spot,” the girl protested, jabbing a finger at my seat. “Why is she in Mom’s spot?”

“Because I asked her to join us.”

“But that’s Mom’s spot!” the girl shouted, causing several heads to turn in our direction.

“You know what, maybe I should—”

Carl stopped me with a hand on my arm when I started to get to my feet. His gaze never left his daughter.

“That’s enough, Alyssa. You’re being rude.”

Brown eyes widened on a stunning face. “I’m being rude? You just invited a complete stranger to take Mom’s place. How are you going to explain that when Mom gets here?”

“She’s not coming, Al,” Carl said sharply.

The girl’s head reared back like her father’s words had smacked her. Her bottom lip trembled.

“You don’t know that!”

Turning on her slipped heels, she stormed away. Her little group hurried after her.

“I think you should go talk to her,” I decided, my heart hurting for the girl.

Carl sighed. “Yeah.” He rose. “I’ll be right back.”

While I wasn’t alone at the table, I didn’t know the couple sitting across from me. Both were in their early forties, and from the looks of them, not the chatting type. Both caught me watching them and quickly looked away. It suited me just fine. I wasn’t in the talking mood anyway. Honestly, I was actually hoping Stacey would show up, not just because I really wanted to leave, but for Alyssa.

No such luck. Carl returned, sans Alyssa and regained his seat.

“I’m so sorry about that,” he said.

I just shook my head.

The meal consisted of two options, chicken or lamb with a side order of steamed vegetables, or wild rice. I chose lamb with wild rice. Not that I ate any of it. There were too many people and Carl kept looking at me. I picked at what was probably the most delicious looking dish in the world and tasted none of it. Occasionally, I would bring the fork to my mouth, or cut a piece of the meat and move it from one side of my plate to the other, just to make it look like it was touched. My stomach whimpered in protest and part of me wondered if I could somehow slip the food into my purse without anyone noticing and eat it in the solitude of my home. But all too soon, the dishes were cleared away and dessert was brought out. Then coffee and tiny cakes. All the while, I just wanted to go home.

It was torture to be starving and not being able to eat. All I could think about was my face and my chewing and how much food was on my fork when I brought it to my mouth. Eating in front of people was like stripping and standing there naked for everyone to judge. My mind was in a constant state of panic wondering if I looked like a pig when I was eating, or if I was chewing too loud. Or worse, what if I ate too much and everyone saw what my mom always saw: a fat slob that could do with losing a few meals? The thought always left me in cold chills.

“Ali?”

I jolted at the intruding voice prodding me out of my spiraling dilemma. I focused on Cal and tried to smile.

“Sorry. What?”

He nodded with his chin towards the dance floor and the other figures already swaying to the sweet flow of trumpets.

“I asked if you wanted to dance.”

“Oh.” I nodded slightly, grateful for the excuse to get away from the table. “Sure.”

He helped me out of my chair and led me onto the floor. The music was slow and soothing as he drew me into the circle of his arms. One hand settled comfortably on my waist while the other one took mine. We swayed back and forth, not going anywhere.

“I have to ask you something,” he said after several minutes. “What’s the real reason you won’t leave your job? Is it the pay? The location? Because I’ll double whatever they’re paying and even pay for your move and apartment in San Francisco.”