The Way of Grace (Miller's Creek Novels) (26 page)

A
curious
expression
descend
ed
on her face
. “J
ust so you know
,
I have yours, too.”

“Never doubted it for a second.
Y
ou’re a good person.”

She sigh
ed again. “Sometimes I doubt that.”

“Why?”

One corner of her mouth turned downward
. “I just
struggle with the best way
to handle things.”

“We all do. That doesn’t mean you’re bad.”
Was she always so hard on herself?

“I know. It’s just . .
. ”
Her words dwindled away and her face went into “I’m-thinking” mode.
Finally she continued
. “I have this friend
who’
s struggling
, and I don’t know how to help her.
One part of me wants to set her s
traight and the other part feels incredibly sorry for her.
”

Something he learned in one of
his counseling classes
popped into his brain
.
Many times
when a person mentioned a friend, they were really seeking answ
ers for themselves
. Was that
the case
here? “Go on.”

“I’m wondering if
they’re
cau
ght in something bigger than they
can get out of.
S
omething potentially dangerous.
One minute
they’re
kind and helpful,
and the next
raging mad and ready t
o take it out on whoever they
perceive
to be crossing them
.”

“It’s okay to get angry sometimes, Gracie. It’s a normal human emotion.
But
you a
lso need to remember
its
secondar
y,
brought on by fear, pain
,
or frustration.
”

Her eyes cloud
ed
. “B
ut
what if they take
it to an extreme?
”

“Maybe she’s stuffed her emotions
too long
,
and they’re starting to work their
way out.”

Gracie’s eyebrows
knotted,
obviously
still
puzz
led
over the situation with ‘her friend.’ “Just e
ncourage
her to be open
.”

Sh
e
bobbed her head, the copper highlights in her hair catching the light
. “
I just hope I’m s
trong enough to handle it.”

“You can do i
t
, Gracie
.
You’re stronger than you realize, and God
will give
you the strength to do what
you need to do
.”

Peaceful confidence radiated from her features
.
“
I know He’s with me, and I’m trying to trust Him in all this.
” Her eyes glazed over as she
gazed over his shoulder
.
“
Remember when we talked about the
difference between grace and mercy
?
How far do you think mercy should go? At what point—if any—does it become about protecting yourself?”

His pulse elevated, and h
e searched her eyes for clues.
Did she feel the need to protect herself?

“I mean, t
he Bible tells us to turn the other cheek, to forgive seventy times seven, to show mercy—”

Matt
laid a hand on
her
fore
arm. “Stop it right there, Gracie. I thin
k I see where you’re headed. Yeah
, the Bible say
s
all those things, but are you really showing mercy if you let someone get away with
wrong
behavior? Is that really what’s best for that person?”

She didn’t answer right away,
but considered
his words. “When you put it like that, I guess not, but who am I to decide what’s best for someone else?”

“There are times you can’t, but there are also times when it’s pretty obvious.”

Indecision flickered on her face.

Lord, help me get this point across.
Matt
racked his brain
for an example.
“
Look at it this way.
If a child at school constantly
bullies others and
blames it on someone else, are you extending mercy if you turn a blind eye?”

She shook her head.

“Or is true mercy
shown by
working with that kid until he learns a better way to live, so he won’t continue in a pattern that’s not only harmful to him, but to others?”

“I see your point, b
ut what if your option appears unkind and unmerciful to the other person?”

“
Aargh
!”
He
brought both hand
s
to his head and
pretended to pull his hair out. “You
type-A personality people
drive me nuts!”

Grace
giggled
.
“
Turnabout’s fair play
.
B
uster
.
And just so you know, y
ou easygoing
types
drive me
crazy, too. Now q
uit stalling and answer my question.”

“Okay. Here are
a couple of
more analogies. Kids need vac
cinations to keep from getting
serious disease
s
,
but w
hen
their
parents take
them to get
a shot, the kid
s
d
on’t see it as merciful. But
it is
because
the alternative would be
worse.”

“Agreed.
Now w
hat’
s
your other example
?
”

He drew in a deep breath. “I’m pretty sure you’re not
gonna
like what I have to say.”

Her eyes
glinted
. “What else is new? Say it anyway.”

He chuckled
, glad to see her more light-hearted
and playful
.
“It’s really more about self-protection
than mercy, but since you’re the one who brought it up
.
” He
hesitat
ed
, will
ing her to get the full impact of what he was about to say. “If you touch a hot stove and it burns you, it seems pretty silly to touch it again.”

She rested her head
on one hand, and
then clamped her jaw and
shook her head.
  “That analogy is flawed.”

Matt rolled his eyes
and
sla
pp
ed both palms on the table
.
She
had an argum
ent
for everything.
“
How?
”

“People aren’t stov
es. They’re human beings
. Someone God loves
as much as He loves us.
” Her
face
lit with a passion he
’d never seen her exhibit
.
“
I
t
’s
possible
God
put me in a place
to be merciful to someone regardles
s of how they treat me.
”

He
couldn’t speak, had nothing to
contradict her statement
. It was possible, but what a sacrifice to make. “I can’t say it’s not possible, but
please
be careful. Whether you decide to stick it out or back away, just remembe
r that everything comes down to motive
. If you do anything with a heart of love—even if the other person thinks you’re being unkind or unforgiving—you’re doing the right thing.”

A flash of hope flickered in her
brown
eyes.
“
I believe that
.”

He
leaned forward and
cupped her face in
his hand
s
.
“
I think you’re one of the most grace-filled and merciful
people I know
, sweetheart
, so d
on’t be so hard on yourself
in this
situation
.”

Her eyes locked
with his, so full of sorrow
it
made him want to cry. “
Please
keep
pray
ing
fo
r me, Matt. Showing grace is
much harder than I ever
dreamed
possible. I think I’m just
now
realizing
how costly it can be.”

“It cost Christ everything.”

She
nodded as
tears welled
in her eyes. “Yet my selfish heart
seems to only focus on
h
ow costly and painful
it
will be
for me
.
”

His heart pounded curiously in his chest, a heavy thud of pressur
e
. He
took her hand
and
p
ray
ed
her words weren’t
somehow
prophetic.

For a brief moment they sat quietly
,
her hand
at rest
in his.
Matt
sent a
smile and
caressed her fingers
with his thumb
.

Gracie jerked her hand away and reached for her cup.

Matt’s heart cratered.
Time to have this discu
ssion.
“What is it about me
you can’t stand
?”

She set the cup down with more force than necessary. It clunked against the table, hot chocolate splashing onto the red and white checkered tablecloth.
“I care about you, Matt, so please don’t start with the questions.
Past our friendship,
I just don’t think we’re right for each other.”

“Why?”

Her
f
eatures hardened
. “Do you really
wanna
have this discussion, ‘
cause
I’m pretty sure you’re not
gonna
like it.”

That. Did. It. Matt opened his mouth to give her what for, but at that precise moment, Steve Mille
r
and his old geezer buddies entered the café
and made their way to a table nearby
, their boisterous conversation and laughter drowning out every other sound.

Steve saw them and
made his way to their booth. “Hey, guys.
Saw y’all at church
last Sunday
, but
never made it over to say hi.
Y’all d
oing
okay?”

Gracie
managed a smile as she looked
up at the
lanky cowboy
.
“
Fine.
Didn’t expect to see you here this time of night.”

“
Just finished up a city council meeting
.
Guess you’ve heard the news?”

Matt
took a cleansing breath and
pushed past his anger. “What
’s that
?”

“
Dani
and I are expecting a baby.”
He grinned
broadly
.

Gracie’s features took on a mixture of joy and jealousy.
“How exciting!
Congrats
!”
The
shrill pitch of her voice held strain.

Matt took in her expression. She wanted a family
, and not just a little
. “Congratulations
, Steve, and pass it along to
Dani
.”