The Way of Grace (Miller's Creek Novels) (34 page)

“Y
ou okay, Gracie?” Matt’s
blond
e
brows
puckered in concern.

“Yeah, I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed.”
And a lot guilty.

“About
?”

“Everything.”
She expected
a
rebuttal, or at least more questions, but when she glanced up, he was focused o
n his plate, obviously lost
in
deep
thoughts of his own.

He glanced up
. “So tell me
more
about your boss.”

Grace stiffened. How much should she reveal? Elena’s last tongue-lashing made her fearful not only for her own safety, but also for
his
.

“
It’s
okay
, Gracie. You’re safe with me.”

She felt safe, as evidenced by the impromptu nap.
But safe in sharing her suspicions?
Not until she had solid proof. Grace
wiped her mouth with a paper towel
. “Professionally, she’s top-notch.
I’ve learned
a lot
from watching her in action.”

“But?”

She fork
ed
a
bite of
asparagus
and
considered her words
.
“
Elena
swings back and forth faster than anyone I’ve ever seen. One minute she’s kind and friendly, the
next
she’s chopping me
into f
ish food. And she’s so
ca
lculating
.”

Matt’
s expression cloud
ed
over
. “Does she exhibit
signs of
possessiveness?”

The warnings to stay away from Matt, Andy
,
and Jason.
The way she had of dictating e
very momen
t of her life
, even on weekends
. Grace nodded.

He frowned
more
, his eyebrows so wrinkled his ey
es almost disappeared.
After a brief silence, Matt’
s
tone and
expression
abruptly
changed. “
I’ve only been ar
ound her briefly, but with
j
ob stress and
being sole provider for a handicapped child, I’
m sure it
affect
s
her behavior.”

Everything he mentioned, s
he’d already considered. But Elena’s
behavior
went way beyond the norm.
“I agree
she’s under stress, but. . . “

“Gracie, are you sure it’s worth working for her?”
Matt’s face held dark thunder.

Worth it?
If it meant protecting Andy, then yes. “I
’ve already told you. I
t’s something I have to do
.”

He
enclosed her hand in his
. “Just promise
you’ll take care of yourself. Anytime
she starts
to unload,
put up a shield.”

Her throat knotted
, making speech difficult
.
“Easier said than done.”

“Yeah
, but
I know you. You’ll take her words to heart, allowing them to hurt you over and over again.”

He’d done it again. Read her like a book he perused
on a
frequent basis
.
She
sigh
ed
. “You’re right, but how do
I stop thinking about it? It’s like a cancer
that eats away at me
.”

Matt forked
food in his mouth.
“You need a rubber band.”

A giggle erupted. “W
hat?”

His face lit with a smile. “A rubber band—you know those stretchy—”

“I know what they are, but I’ve never known that to be a remedy for overthinking. Did you pick that up in Psych 101?”

He laughed out loud. “It may have
been 201. Put the rubber band around your wrist. W
hen you catch your thoughts
returning to her hurtful comment
s, snap the rubber band and think ‘stop.’ It’s basically just reconditioning.”

“It’s worth a try.”
Especially if it kept her f
rom ruminating on Elena’s razor-
sharp words.

“Let me know how it works.”

“Will do.”
A perfect segue opportunity. “Now that we
’ve
discussed my problems, mind if I ask you a question?”

Matt
skewed
his lips
. “D
on’t know. The way you phrased that makes it sound like I have a problem.”

A laugh bubbled out
. “Oh, so just because you counsel others with their problems means you have none of your own?”

He chuckled.
“Touché, but I’m not the one who’s practically perfect in every way.
” He wiped his mouth
with a wink and a smile
. “So what’s
my problem, counselor?”

“I know you got your feelings hurt
last night
, and
I wa
nted a chance to explain. I
didn’t intend for Jason to kiss me.
”

He
shook his head
. “
No need to explain.
I can’t
really
blame the guy. You looked gorgeous.
”

“Thanks.”
Conversation lapsed, and t
h
e rest of the meal was eaten
mostly
in
silenc
e, with only polite small talk.
Afterwards, Matt washed the dishes while she dried and put them away.
Again she marveled at how natural and unforced
they were together
, a cohesive rhythm and harmony
between them
she couldn’t explain
.

Once they were done, Grace hung her towel over th
e edge of the sink and
face
d Matt, who
gazed at her i
n a way that ma
de her heart gallop
. “You promised t
o sing the song you wrote
. And by the way, I loved the music during dinner. I had no idea you were so good.”

His expression didn’t change
, but his intense gaze
made her feel
that he peered
straight
in
to her soul.
“
Glad you enjoyed it. Why don’t yo
u have a seat
while I grab my guitar?”

Her
thoughts whirled as
she moved to the
couch
.
Had she unknowingly overlooked who he was on the inside because she couldn’t see past
his
wrinkled clothes and boyish behavior
?
She’d
just taken a seat
when he r
eturned,
his guitar in hand. Her mind flashed to the summer over two ye
ars ago
when they’d
relaxed
around a campfire on a church outing
and sung worship songs. Heavy disappointment draped her heart when h
e took a seat in a chair across the room rather than
next to her
.

He smiled.
“The song I sang
earlier is one I wrote last year. It’s been picked up by a group out of Nashville.”

“Seriously?”
Her mouth swung open.

“Yeah.
Pretty cool, huh?” His tone held no arrogance, only joy.
He moved his capo to a fret near the tuning pegs and launched into the rollickin
g, bluesy song he’d sung
ea
rlier.

The lyrics spoke of the importa
nce of people loving each other, and s
he co
uldn’t keep from harmonizing
the last time through the chorus. How long had it been since she’d allowed herself the simple pleasure of singing?
Grace applauded when the song en
ded. “I love i
t
, Matt! It’s
so catchy. And the lyrics are
Christian, but not in a preachy way, you know?”

He b
eamed
. “That’
s the best compliment ever
.
I don’t
wanna
cram
religion down people’s throats. That only turns them off. I
wanna
snea
k in the back door,
to teach th
e principles
Jesus taught, to help them have a relationship with Him.
”

Fascination captured her full attention
, l
ike she truly saw
him for the first time.

“S
orry. I’m blabbering.”

“No you’re not.” She
lowered her gaze
.
“Matt, I owe you a big apology f
or misjudgin
g you.”

He said nothing,
his
gaze
unwavering.

She swallowed against the lump in her throat.
“I’ve let really petty and superficial things color my opini
on of you and I’m so very
sor
ry. N
ot only are you able to read people well
and counsel them
, but you’re a
really great
guy
with amazing talent.”

Without a word, h
e rose to his feet
, carried his guitar
to the bedroom, and
stayed
.

Grace
gathered
her things. Had she emb
arrassed him? Had her admission
made him decide
she wasn’t worth
his time?

“Going somewhere?” Matt entered the room, a frown on his face.

“I probably should be getting bac
k.” She
looked back
at
hi
m, her coat in her hands. “S
orry if I said something to
upset you.”

In a heartbeat
, he stood directly
in front of her, his hands on her s
houlders
.
“You didn’t upset me, Gracie.
You answered my prayer.”

Before she could open her mouth to speak, he claimed her lips with his own.

14

F
or a long moment, Matt lost himself
in the kiss,
not quite believing
he was finally kissing her
,
or
t
hat she
was kissing
him back. But fear
crept in, and he pulled a
way. The last thing he wanted
was
to
take advantage of her vulnerability.
One glance at her was all it took to see the wisdom of his decision. She looked ready to collapse, confused and bewildered.
He smoothed her hair
. “That was beyond nice, but we need to talk.”

She broke free from his gaze and
nodd
ed
.

Matt hel
d her hand to
reassure
her. Gracie was the type to over-analyze everything anyone sai
d or did, a
nd then she internalized it, turning even innocent comments and gestures into
deadly weapons against herself. M
ore than likely a response held ove
r from her traumatic childhood.

He led her to the couch and sat down beside her, tilting her chin until she met his gaze.
“I don’t
wanna
scare you away,
sweetheart
, but I have to tell you how I feel. I’m in love with you and have been sinc
e that summer two years ago, even after
you told me you
only
wanted to
be friends and even after
I thought I’d gotten over you.
”

Her eyes held a dark softness that threatened to pull him under. In a split second the softness turned to fear.