The Weight of Heaven (14 page)

be done at HerbalSolutions—and so pinched and narrow when it

came to solving the one problem they actually could—helping one

poor boy live up to his full potential?

Th e We i g h t o f H e av e n

9 5

Frank felt a little pinch on his shoulder. “Hey, you,” Ellie said.

“I’m still here. Where did you go?”

He immediately felt guilty about his ungenerous thoughts. Ever

since that lovely evening at Nandita’s, things had been sweet between him and Ellie, and he didn’t want to upset the cart. Just last

night he had made love to her for the first time in weeks, and it had

not been the cautious lovemaking that they’d slipped into since Benny’s death. He had fallen asleep pleased that they had not lost that

electric connection, that they were still capable of fucking like they

were twenty-five.

“I’m here, babe,” he smiled. “I was just thinking . . . how about

if we go somewhere for the day on Sunday? Might do us good to get

away for a few hours.”

“That’s a great idea. I’ve missed you this week. And you’ve been

working such long hours that I worry about you.” She squeezed his

hand. “Tell you what. How about we pack a picnic and go to a nice

beach somewhere along the coast? Would you like that?”

He began to grin his approval and then stopped, struck by a

thought.

“What?” Ellie said.

“Nothing. Only that, I’d promised Ramesh that I’d spend a

whole day at the beach with him soon. So if we go, we can’t tell him

where we’re going, okay?”

Ellie’s face was expressionless. “I see,” she said and again, that

awkward, infuriating silence grew between them.

“It’s okay,” he said hastily. “Really. I shouldn’t have even brought

it up. It’s just that—he’s so sensitive, that boy. I don’t want to hurt

his feelings. But as long as we don’t tell him—”

“Well, we can just have him join us,” Ellie said. “That would

solve it, wouldn’t it? Would you like that?”

Would he like that? Despite his best efforts to keep his face blank,

Frank could feel it inflame with joy. From the look on Ellie’s face,

he knew that she’d noticed it too and felt ashamed. But the fact was

9 6 Th r i t y U m r i g a r

inescapable. The thought of Ramesh joining them made the proposed picnic immediately more pleasurable. With just him and Ellie

at the beach it would be sweet, but with the ever-present possibility

of awkwardness or even hostility. But Ramesh would liven things

up. There would be no room for silences, for strained conversations, for the deliberate avoidance of subjects that could trigger sad

memories.

Ellie was staring at her dinner plate, getting the last of the chicken

pie onto her fork. Frank sensed that she was looking away out of

kindness, embarrassed for him and his naked need for this young

boy. He also knew that her question was a test of sorts.

Saving his marriage was more important than an idle promise to

Ramesh, he decided. He remembered Scott’s reminder about Ellie

being the most significant thing in his life. “Listen,” he said. “Let’s

forget I even mentioned Ramesh. Let’s just you and I go and have a

good time, shall we?”

For a second, Ellie looked tempted. Then, as she got up and

picked the empty plates off the table, she said, “It’s okay, hon. Invite

him. I know you’ll feel better if he’s there—that way, you don’t have

to break your promise to him,” she added hastily. She kissed the

back of his head as she carried the dishes to the sink.

He sat alone at the table, feeling that he had failed her test despite giving her the correct answer. But even while he was chastising

himself, a thin, sharp feeling was piercing him. He recognized it as

anticipation at the thought of spending the whole day at the beach

with Ramesh.

Chapter 9

Edna seemed thrilled at the prospect of her son’s outing with Ellie

and Frank, but Prakash was a different story. The man had come

over at nine to put together their picnic basket, and a little later

Ramesh bounded into the kitchen. “Dada,” the boy said, “Ma wants

to know if—”

“Chup re,”
Prakash hissed, slapping the back of Ramesh’s head.

“Stupid boy. Turning my brain to yogurt with your Dada this, Dada

that.”

From the living room, they saw Prakash’s gesture. Ellie felt Frank

tense. “If he touches that kid one more time, I swear I’m gonna deck

him,” he said.

“Frank, just ignore it,” Ellie whispered. “He’s just—who knows

what his problem is? He’s just acting out for our benefit. Anyway,

we’ll be out of here in no time.” All the while thinking, that she

knew exactly what Prakash’s problem was—the man was jealous.

Jealous and ashamed, because on his salary, he could never put together a lavish picnic, could never treat his son to a day on the beach

in the style that they would. She marveled again at how obtuse her

usually perceptive husband became when it came to matters involving Ramesh. The boy was truly his blind spot.

9 8 Th r i t y U m r i g a r

They heard Prakash raise his voice again. “You come home,

jaldi-jaldi
, understand? Lots-lots homework to do. No waste whole

day on beach like a
mawali
.”

“But Dada—” Ramesh’s voice sounded anguished.

Before Ellie could stop him, Frank strode into the kitchen. She

followed him, standing in the doorway between the living room and

the kitchen. “You knew we were going to be gone the whole day,”

Frank was saying. “What’s all this fuss now? In any case, the boy’s

all caught up on his homework. So what’s the problem?”

Prakash kept his head bowed as he concentrated on the chicken

sandwiches he was assembling. A long moment passed. “Prakash,”

Frank said, as Ramesh looked tearfully from one man to another.

“Is there a problem?”

The cook finally looked up. His eyes glittered with—anger?

Malice? “No problem, sir,” he said. And then, with a sudden grin

that had not a trace of joy in it, “Have a nice day.”

Frank stared at Prakash for another moment—a moment too

long, Ellie thought. There’s no need to humiliate the man in front of

his son, she thought to herself, willing Frank to walk away, ready

to intervene if he didn’t. Just as she was about to, Frank let out a

short sigh and turned away. So that he didn’t see—but Ellie did—

the quick, furtive look that Prakash threw toward Frank. This time,

she had no trouble reading the expression on the man’s face. It was

pure hatred. Her stomach dropped.

As if he knew he had been caught, Prakash expertly smoothed

his expression into the mask of pleasant blankness he usually wore

around them. “You wanting pickle with food, madam?” he asked.

“Me pack pickle?”

“No thanks,” she said. She couldn’t imagine eating the tangy,

spicy lime relish with the other foods they were taking.

“Put some for me, dada,” Ramesh said as she walked toward her

bedroom to find the sunscreen.

Th e We i g h t o f H e av e n

9 9

“Shut your mouth,” she heard Prakash hiss. “Bad boy. Getting

father into much trouble with the
feringas
.”
Feringas
. Foreigners. So

that’s how they think of us. Although she knew she was being ridiculous, she couldn’t help feel disappointed.

The interaction with Prakash had put a damper on their spirits

as they got into the car but not for long. “Good morning, Satish,”

Ellie said to the driver and was gratified to receive a smile that was

warm and genuine.

“How are you today, madam?” Satish asked. His eyes fell on

Ramesh. “He’s coming?”

“Yah,” Ramesh said. He turned to Frank. “I want to sit in the

back, in between you and Ellie.”

“Well, good thing we’re taking the Camry then.” Frank laughed.

He looked over Ramesh’s head at Ellie. “That okay with you?” he

mouthed, and she nodded.

Ramesh scampered into the back seat. “Bye Ma, bye Dada,” he

called to his parents, who were standing by the gate of the driveway.

“Good Lord,” Frank whispered to Ellie before making his way

to the other side of the car. “You’d think we were away for a week

rather than a damn day.”

As he backed out of the driveway, Satish got into the spirit of

things. “You’re sitting in the back,” he said mournfully to Ramesh.

“I’m all alone in front. No company for me,
yaar
.”

“Want me to come to front?” the boy asked promptly. “I can

climb over the seat.”

Satish looked at Frank and Ellie in his rear view mirror and

laughed. “No,
ustad
, it’s okay. I’m just taking your
firki
.”

“What’s that mean? That last thing you said?” Ellie asked.

“Taking someone’s
firki
? Like making fun, you know?” Satish

grinned.

“Arre
, I’ll take your
firki
double,” Ramesh said. His accent was

1 0 0 Th r i t y U m r i g a r

thicker and his manner less diffident in Satish’s presence. She wondered if Frank had noticed, also. “My three best friends and I are

teasing each other all day at school,” he announced.

“You have three best friends?” Ellie said. “How is that possible?”

Ramesh looked puzzled. “Why not possible, Ellie?”

“Well, you can have many
good
friends. But there can only be

one best friend, right?”

The boy considered for a moment. Then, “But if I have only one

best friend, then what happens to my other best friends?” He looked

so pleased with himself that the others laughed.

“Wah, wah, ustad
. You are a champion arguer.”

“I’m also champion at maths. And basketball. And history.” He

turned toward Frank. “Tell him.”

“He’s right,” Frank said. “Ramesh is a champion eater. And a

champion tall-tale teller. And a champion nose-picker.”

“Hey,” Ramesh yelled, hitting Frank on his arm with his fist.

“Stoppit.”

“Such talents, Ramu,” Satish said. “I’m impressed.”

Ellie could tell that the boy was hovering at that point between

giggling and getting whiny. She knew if she didn’t intervene, the

two men would continue teasing the boy until they’d have a fullblown tantrum on their hands. “So which beach are we going to?”

she said, changing the subject. “Where should we go, Satish?”

“You wanting to go to Foreigner’s Beach, madam?” he asked.

Foreigner’s Beach was the local name given to the beach that Hotel

Shalimar and the other, newer resorts overlooked. Ellie considered.

If there was another American couple on the sand, they would feel

compelled to come up to the Bentons to chat. Frank would hate sharing his time with Ramesh with anyone else. Plus, she was hoping

that if Ramesh fell asleep in the afternoon, she and Frank could go

for a walk.

Th e We i g h t o f H e av e n 1 0 1

“No Foreigner’s Beach,” she said. “Something more—quiet,

maybe? With just local people?”

“No locals on the beach in daytime, madam,” Satish replied

promptly. “They go during sunset.”

Ellie remembered. Indians hated to sunbathe and came to the

beach wearing their regular clothes, although she had seen the affluent Indian tourists who visited the resorts out on the sand in Tshirts and shorts. Even that, Nandita had told her, was a relatively

recent trend.

Satish drove them to a pretty, secluded beach with a grove of coconut trees behind them and huge boulders where the water curved

in to meet the sand. “This is beautiful,” Ellie gasped.

“Thank you, madam,” Satish replied. The young man helped

them carry their beach chairs and the large rainbow-colored umbrella that would protect them from the bubbling sun. He and Frank

pounded the metal pole of the umbrella into the sand. Then he

straightened and looked at Frank. “What time should I pick you up,

sir?” he said.

For Ellie, this was always the awkward part, after Satish had

dropped them off someplace and disappeared until he was summoned again. For a moment she contemplated asking this nice

young man to join them for the day, but she knew Frank would not

forgive her if she invited Satish to intrude upon their day. No, better

to get through the momentary embarrassment, which, for all she

knew, only she felt. Satish was probably glad to get away from them

and have the day to himself. Though where he went, she didn’t have

a clue. Despite herself, she found herself asking, “Will you have

someplace to go?”

“No problem, madam,” he said. “Village is close by, only. Some

friends there I’ll be seeing.” This was Satish’s stock answer. He apparently had friends every place they ever went, including Bombay.

Ellie suspected he was just being polite, not wanting them to feel

1 0 2 Th r i t y U m r i g a r

discomfort on his behalf, the way the have-nots always seemed to

protect the sensibilities of the haves.

“I’m hungry,” Ramesh announced as soon as Satish had left.

“Boy, your mother told me you’d eaten breakfast,” Frank said.

“You must have worms in your stomach.”

“I have a nail tree growing in my belly,” the boy said seriously.

“A nail tree?” Frank and Ellie asked simultaneously. “You mean,

like, metal nails? Shall I hammer them out?” Frank grinned.