The_Demons_Wife_ARC (23 page)

“I—I never had
an experience like that,” Samael said. The cool detachment in his voice
bothered her, but she still didn’t want to confront him about it. Why ruin what
was supposed to be a fun afternoon, even if that wasn’t exactly how it was
turning out.

“No, I…I guess
you wouldn’t, being a demon and all,” Claire said sullenly.

The snow got
deeper as they followed the path further into the woods.

“Right there,”
Claire said, pointing to a large granite boulder that stuck up out of the snow
like a huge tooth, “is where I saw a black bear once.”

It pained her
to see that someone—probably some high-school punks—had spray-painted the rock
with scrolling, illegible initials and logos.

“Did it attack
you? The bear, I mean?” Samael asked. For once there was a spark of interest in
her past life.

Claire shook
her head.

“Nope. It
never even made a move toward me. It was eating blueberries from that bush over
there, and he just watched me as I passed on by.”

Samael nodded
but said nothing more, seemingly totally uninterested in any of her nostalgic
stories. They walked for a long time in silence. The angle of sunlight
filtering through the trees along the path was more familiar to Claire than her
own bedroom. She inhaled the fresh, pine-scented air, letting the woodland
smells take her back to a happier, simpler time.

So to Hell
with him…Even if he can’t appreciate any of this, I certainly can.

But the closer
they got to “The Pond,” the more unsettled she became.

One obvious
thing that bothered her was how everything looked so small and…limited was the
only other word that came to mind. In her memory and imagination, this had been
a mighty forest, as deep and dense—and dangerous—as the Black Forest in
Germany. It could hide countless numbers of mythical, magical creatures and
dangerous, supernatural beings.

The closer
they got to “The Pond,” the more litter and trash she saw strewn around. And
not just old, rusting stuff. There were empty beer cans and liquor bottles…food
wrappers…and other junk everywhere, blighting the scene and Claire’s childhood
memories. Several of the larger trees that she remembered had either fallen
down or been hacked down for campfire, the rough axe marks obviously not those
of experienced woodsmen. Even the ground itself—the snow-covered path—appeared
to be worn out.

“Beautiful, isn’t
it?” she asked, trying as much to convince herself as Samael.

He said
nothing but kept walking, his eyes fixed straight ahead as though he wasn’t
even a part of this world. Claire was confused and frustrated by his
detachment. She wished he would talk to her…tell her what the problem was.

If Claire had
been feeling disappointment before, though, it crashed down on her when they
arrived at “The Pond.”

“Oh, my God,”
she whispered, struck with amazement by what she saw before them.

The instant
the word—the name of God was out of her mouth, Samael let out a low, slow moan
that sounded as if he were in great pain.

Claire turned
to him and saw a wicked fire dancing in his eyes, making them glow with a deep
orange light that matched the disk of the setting sun.

His eyes look
different, she thought, but the thought flittered away because of her concern
for him.

“Are you all
right?”

She was
convinced that something was seriously wrong with him…something he didn’t want
to discuss with her.

When Samael
looked at her, his face shifted back to the same blank expression he’d worn all
day. She had the distinct impression he was wearing a mask, and that she
couldn’t see and had never seen what was beneath that mask.

“I’m fine…I’m
fine,” he said, even though his tone of voice was that of someone who
absolutely is not fine.

Claire wanted
to let it drop, so she looked out across “The Pond,” awed by how pitifully
small…actually tiny it looked.

“Things sure
do change, don’t they?” she said.

“How do you
mean?”

“I…For years,
I’ve had such powerful memories of this place, and now looking at it, it seems
so insignificant.”

“Your
world—your horizons have expanded,” Samael said. “And as they do, we see some
things for what they really are.”

Claire
wondered if there was a veiled message in what he said, but she ignored it and
kept staring at “The Pond.” The surface was covered with a layer of dirty snow
on top of ice that Claire knew would be too thin to support them if they
ventured out onto it. There were signs that someone—teenagers—had been partying
out here recently. To the left, on the narrow sand beach where Claire and her
friends used to sunbathe, there was evidence of a huge fire. Charred logs and
crushed beer cans lay all about in the mess of footprints in the snow. Someone
had left behind a single boot.

“We used to
swim here all the time,” she said, trying hard to conjure up her best childhood
memories. “My brother and his friends would come out here, too, so we’d stay
away when they were around because they were always teasing us, calling us
names and—you know, being rude.”

“You mean
acting like they wanted to fuck you,” Samael said.

Claire was
shocked.

“What?” she
said, her voice scaling up.

“I’m just
saying the truth. That’s what they wanted, right? Only I’ll bet the little
assholes were so insecure not one of them would have known what to do if you or
any of your friends showed any interest. Probably the lot of them had tiny
dicks, too, that would have shriveled up to nothing if a woman or even a girl
ever saw them.”

Claire was
astounded to hear him speak like this. It wasn’t at all like him to express
himself so crudely…unless, she thought, this was another side…maybe a side of
him he had kept hidden from her…

Until now.

“Are you—” she
started to say, but she let it drop.

Samael was
beginning to frighten her. It was all but impossible to believe that such a
small, sad-looking pond like this had meant so much to her. And seeing it
through his eyes, the loss of innocence stung deeply. Like the small house she
had grown up in and the small town that had defined her horizons until she went
off to college, seeing “The Pond” now all but overwhelmed her with melancholy.
Fighting back tears, she turned away from Samael and let the sadness sweep
through her.

Finally,
unable to hold it back any longer, she began to cry. Warm tears carved tracks
down her cheeks as sobs wrenched her body, making her shiver.

She waited,
for Samael to reach out and touch her gently on the shoulder and then take her
into his arms and hold and caress and kiss her. She wanted to feel safe and
secure with him…

But he didn’t,
and he remained aloof as wave after wave of emotion washed over her until she
felt like she was sinking down into the slimy, murky depths of “The Pond.”

She wasn’t
even sure what she was crying about.

Her childhood?

The sadness of
times past?

Her hopes and
worries for the future?

Her desire and
need for Samael’s love?

She wiped her
eyes with the flats of her hands as she cried, wishing she didn’t feel so
utterly alone.

“You know,”
she said, her voice halting as she stared at the woods on the far side of “The
Pond.” “Sometimes I feel like…”

When she
turned to him to seek comfort in his arms, she was stunned to see that he
wasn’t there.

~ * ~

“Samael?” she
called, her voice echoing hollowly from the opposite shore.

She looked
around, wondering where he could have gone so fast. He was nowhere to be seen,
not even on the path leading back to the house,

An icy blade
of panic slid between her ribs.

She looked at
the ground, but in the confusion of tracks made by the teenage partiers, she
couldn’t distinguish her and Samael’s from the mass. She started moving toward
the woods, scanning the snow for his tracks. She thought he might be playing a
trick on her and had hidden so he could jump out and scare her.

But as she
continued to look around and study the ground carefully, she still couldn’t see
any signs she could positively identify as Samael’s.

“All
right!…You got me!…Come on out!” she called.

She wondered
if he had the ability to make himself invisible and was using it now to tease
her or freak her out, for whatever reason.

But if he
truly loved her like he said he did, why would he do something like this—even
if he was only teasing her? It wasn’t very nice, considering how vulnerable she
was feeling at the moment.

“Samael!” she
shouted, louder. Her voice echoing from the woods on the opposite shore
redoubled.

“…ael…”

Her eyes
widened, and she viciously wiped away the gathering tears, trying to see.
Frustrated, she scooped up a handful of snow, made a compact snowball, and sent
it flying out onto “The Pond.” It hit the slushy snow with a dull thud.

“This isn’t
funny anymore!” she shouted, anger now mixing with hurt. “It wasn’t funny to
begin with!”

“…to begin
with…”

He’s hiding
somewhere…trying to scare me
, she thought, wanting to believe it.

Or maybe he’s
really gone?

Is he so bored
being here…with me…that he’s decided to ditch me?

Again!

She didn’t
like these thoughts, but the only other thing she could think of was that he
had never been here with her in the first place…She had imagined him being here
all along…and now the reality of being back home had proven him to be the
illusion he was.

A sudden
mistrust of reality swept over her, and she began to tremble.

Her legs were
numb and as stiff as sticks as she started back the way they had come. Keeping
a careful watch for his footprints on the ground, she finally arrived at the
point where they had exited the woods.

There they
were—two sets of tracks, side by side heading toward “The Pond.”

But there were
no third, fresher tracks leading away from “The Pond,” so she knew he hadn’t
come this way.

So where did
he go, and how did he disappear so fast? She had just been standing there
talking to him, and…poof!

She looked
back at “The Pond,” half-expecting—and desperately hoping—to see him standing
there in the gloomy afternoon light, but he was nowhere to be seen.

“I’m heading
back now,” she called out, feeling a lot less courageous than she sounded.

“…back now… “

“You wanna
screw around? Fine!”

“…Fine…”

The echo of
her voice faded away. There were no other sounds, not even the song of
birds—chickadees or sparrows—tweeting in the pine trees.

Foolish
childhood fears reared their heads as they began to untangle inside her. Too
many memories of being out here—either with friends or alone—and getting
spooked only served to fuel her rising panic. When she was a kid, she had never
come out here alone after twilight.

During the
day? Sure.

But not when
it was getting dark. She and her friends had told themselves too many horror
stories about the evil things that lurk in the darkening woods and would gladly
eat you.

Goblins…ghosts...and
demons…

But if Samael
was here, he’d protect me
, she thought.

But that was
just the problem.

He wasn’t
here, and he was exactly one of those things she had been afraid of when she
was little.

She realized
that she had to face these fears now all on her own.

Like life…

Samael
wouldn’t be doing this to her…not if he loved her.

No one who
loved someone would put them in a situation like this without warning.

“For the last
time!”

“…time…”

She looked to
the west, at the streaks of purple clouds in the rapidly darkening sky.

 “Come on
out!”

“…on out…”

She tried not
to think about how she had never…never been out here after dark, even as a
teenager.

“I know you’re
hiding.”

“…hiding…”

She heard the
nervous quaver in her voice and told herself that, if she didn’t start back for
the house soon, it would be pitch dark by the time she got halfway home.

It’s already
too late,
a voice whispered in her head as those old fears rose up like phantoms all
around her. She half-expected to see ghostly shapes, drifting in the gathering
gloom.

Trembling with
fear, she started back along the path. The snow glowed with an eerie blue
light. The footsteps she and Samael had made on their way out here were as dark
as inkwells punched in the crust of snow. Claire’s boots made loud crunching
sounds as she walked…sounds that, when she was a kid, she always imagined were
the grinding teeth of something—