Thong on Fire (21 page)

This motherfucker was serious!

“Free,” I said, sitting up and reaching for him. “Why can’t we just chill together for one night? Damn. We had a real good evening and I know you was feeling me just like I was feeling you. Why you pulling away so hard now?”

He swung his feet around to the floor. “What’s real, Saucy? I just wanna sleep by myself. You got a fly crib to rest in but you acting like you don’t wanna go home. What’s with that?”

“I
don’t
wanna go home!” I blurted out. “I’m moving out. I gotta find another place real fast and I was gonna ask you if I could chill here with you!”

He went quiet and got a real cold look in his eyes. “You was gonna ask
me
that?”

I looked down at the floor. I couldn’t believe it. In my wildest nightmares I hadn’t imagined this fish would be so damn hard to hook. I shook inside at the thought that he might reject me again.

“Yeah,” I finally said. “I was.”

He shook his head for a long time, like he couldn’t find the words to express himself. Then finally he said, “Nah, Saucy. I care about you a whole lot. You deep in my heart, baby, that’s truth. But our heads are in two different places. I ain’t sure about stepping off into no deep water with you, though. At least not right now.”

I
DIDN’T KNOW WHETHER
to tear that nigga’s crib up or fall on the floor and get stupid and start begging. No nigga had ever pushed me aside in my life and I didn’t know how to play it without totally playing myself.

Free was quiet when he walked me downstairs and he didn’t say shit the whole time we stood there waiting while the doorman flagged down a cab.

“Aiight,” he said when the cab pulled up and I got in. He put the shopping cart and the empty food containers in on the other side. “Be cool, Saucy. I’ll get witcha.”

He didn’t seem like he wanted to kiss me goodbye so I just closed the cab door and waved out the window as I pulled away. Free stood outside watching as we drove off. He had on a wifebeater and some Sean Paul jeans, and his hands was in his pockets so I guess that’s why he didn’t wave back.

But I hadn’t been back in my apartment for more than ten minutes when my cell phone rang. I had been planning to wash out Tai’s plastic containers and give them back to her, but hell she had a dishwasher so I just left them sitting in the cart and went in the kitchen to get a drink of water when I felt the vibration on my waist.

I yanked the phone off my waistband so hard the clip broke. I looked at the caller ID before flipping it open and bust out grinning. Yeah! That nigga knew!

“Saucy,” he said after I said hello. “You home?”

“Yeah. I just got here a few minutes ago. Why?”

He hesitated. “I just wanted to make sure you got home okay, ya know? New York is a crazy town.”

My heart was touched!

“You was worrying about me, boo?”

“A little bit,” he admitted. “I mean, I know you hardcore and gangsta and can take care of yourself and all that. But I still wanted to make sure you was cool, nah’ mean?”

“I ain’t gangsta, Free!”

“You mean you’re not gangsta?”

“Yeah. That’s what I just said. Couldn’t no gangsta give you what I gave you tonight. I’m all woman, Free. And I know how to act like a lady.”

“I ain’t looking for you to just act like a lady, Saucy. I want you to be one.”

I didn’t know
what
this nigga was talking about. All I wanted was another chance to make him feel me the way he was feeling me in the beginning and I told him that.

“Just gimme another chance, Free. I know you feeling this, baby. You gotta be.”

“Aiight. I’m taking a little trip. I’ll be back next week. I’ll be staying at my crib in Jersey. I’ll pick you up and we can chill for a couple of days to see how shit goes. How’s that?”

My mind got busy calculating. I had to be outta this joint on the thirty-first and Marshall had already told me there wasn’t gonna be no extensions given. He’d probably have the next bitch up in here ten minutes after I booked. If Free wasn’t coming back until sometime next week, then that meant I had one good week to work on his ass before I had to drop him completely and find me a new herb who was wide open. I knew if I was forced to go that route and moved in with some other nigga, it would be over between me and Free for good.

“I guess it’s cool. But a whole week? I’ma miss you boo.”

He laughed. “Yeah. I hear that. See ya next week. I’ll holla.”

I took a shower and went to bed with a smile on my face, but as soon as I opened my eyes the next morning I knew something was wrong. I had a nasty taste in my mouth, and when I stood up to go use the bathroom the room spun and my stomach lurched.

“Oh, shit,” I whispered, running toward the bathroom. I felt like I wanted to throw up, but I didn’t. Chills broke out on my arms and my body started to sweat.

“That fuckin’ Tai!” I muttered as I climbed back in the bed. She musta did something really fucked up with that food we ate last night. I was praying whatever I got hold of, Free had skipped it because I felt horrible. I started to call him and see if he felt sick, but I didn’t wanna make a pest outta myself or worse, make him think I was desperate and looking for an excuse to talk to him before next week.

Instead, I called Tai. “Girl, that food was nasty last night.”

She thought I was giving her a compliment.

“Thanks, Sauce. I told you I put my toe in it.”

“Well, you must got some athlete’s foot going on because I feel real sick this morning.”

“Well ain’t you a bitch!” Tai hollered into the phone. “Why do you being sick have to be related to my food? Free ate it, right? Did he get sick?”

“
Uhn
-huh!” I lied. “He didn’t sleep all night. I was up holding him while he threw that shit up all over the bathroom. Maybe it was something in the greens, huh? I told you about eating that pork, Tai. It ain’t no good for you and it makes you fat.”

“Uh-
ha
!” Tai screeched. “I busted your ass! You said you was feeding some little old lady at a nursing home, Saucy! You are such a big-ass liar. I can’t believe
shit
you say!”

“Calm down, Tai! I did feed that old lady! But that was a whole lotta food! How much you think one little shriveled-ass old woman can eat? I took the leftovers to Free last night, that’s what happened. Damn!”

“Whatever, Saucy. You don’t appreciate shit I do for you. You got issues, girl. And I mean that shit.”

“I didn’t mean nothing by it, Tai. I was just telling you in case you still had some food left over and was gonna eat it. I’m just trying to look out for you girl!”

“Yeah. Good looking out. But I already told you, I don’t eat like that no more. I’m making some healthy choices in my life these days. You know. Cutting out all the bullshit that doesn’t benefit me.”

The way she said it made me think she might be talking about me.

“I gotta be outta this apartment in two weeks,” I said, changing the subject. “I’m looking for someplace to stay, but so far ain’t nothing shaking.”

“What happened with Marshall?” she asked.

“Long story. But basically I just can’t deal with him no more. You know? I see his wife looking happy at all them big-time Black Diamond events, grinning all up in his face, when I know damn well how much he wants to be with me. He said he’s gonna divorce her so he can be mine full-time, but even still. I just can’t do that no more. It’s killing him that I’m breaking things off, but it’s what I gotta do.”

“Well that’s smart. Neither you nor his wife should be making life so convenient for that nigga. I don’t care how paid he is. But at least when his wife bounces she has her own cheese to take with her. She’s smart and beautiful. That new jewelry line is really working for her and those magazine ads with her cute little boys makes people want to go out and buy her designs, but where is all this gonna leave you?”

Ass out,
but I wasn’t gonna fess up to that shit.

“Oh, I’m good,” I said real quick. “You know Free is still large in this game, no matter what went down at Ruthless. He could one day be as large as Marshall, but the good part is, he don’t have no wife and kids clocking him.”

Tai seemed surprised. “Oh? Free is gonna let you stay with him? You sure about that?”

“Yeah,” I said with some attitude. “I’m sure. Why wouldn’t he, Tai? We’ve been kicking it for a minute.”

“Oh, okay. I just thought…you know.”

“Nah,” I said. “I
don’t
know.” I felt myself getting defensive. I was the one sucking Free’s dick. Not Tai. “What are you tryna say? Did you hear something different from Free?”

“Saucy. Whatever you and Free do is between y’all. I work with him a lot, but I’m not in his business like that. I was just surprised to hear you say he was sick and in the bed with you this morning because I know he flew to Vegas before the sun came up.”

How in the fuck did
she
know?!? Free hadn’t even told
me
where he was going!

“You know Jaheim rolled with him,” she went on. “I dropped him off at the airport at five this morning and Free was already there so I know he got on that flight.”

Jaheim?!? I couldn’t stand his bony ass. I didn’t know why Tai was dropping his gay behind off. I’d run into him when I was out partying one night and tried to get with him. That herb acted like I was offering him some poison instead of some pussy!

I rolled my eyes. “Did I say what
time
in the morning Free was with me, Tai? No. I
didn’t
. Look,” I snapped. I was ready to get off the damn phone now. “Some baller is beeping in on my other line. I gotta go. Later.”

I had four days left when Free finally came by to see me. He had been back in New York for a couple of days, but every time I called him he claimed he was taking care of business and would call me back when he could.

Well that didn’t do nothing but piss me off. I had gone clubbing while he was in Vegas and met this rapper named Quaison from the Lower East Side. He was onstage spittin’ but he was only half decent. He musta spotted me out there dancing because he asked one of his homeys to bring me a drink.

That nigga didn’t
even
know how long my throat was! I drank up all his dollas and left him with no cents! I ended up going home with him that night and we hit some lines and did the wild thang until his dick was sore. Quaison lived with his mother in a one-bedroom apartment. For some reason his moms slept on a pull-out bed in the living room, giving Quai the tiny little bedroom right off the kitchen. We was high as hell, hitting lines until my eyes felt like they was bulging outta my head. Quai put on a condom and started banging my pussy so good I began screaming like somebody was slaying my ass.

“Shut the fuck up!” he hissed, fucking me even deeper. “My moms is sleeping in the living room!”

I kept right on yelling. That shit felt damn good, and if his moms hadn’t known he was in there hitting skins, she damn sure knew now. What did she think we was gonna do back there when we tiptoed past her bed at four in the damn morning?

“You down for some freaky shit?” Quai had asked me when we first got to his room. Shit, I was lifted and buzzed and feeling like a superhero. I was down for any damn thing.

“Let’s make us a fuck tape, baby,” he said, and whipped out the camera. “We can see which one of us got the best game going, bet?”

I looked at the lines on the dresser and the half a bottle of Patrón on the floor and said, fuck it. Why not? I liked the way my body looked naked and yeah, I’d done a few backroom productions on a couple of video sets. Plus, this nigga was challenging me. Tryna stunt like he might possibly have a better sex game than me. Later for that!

I worked on Quai like he was my pet project. I put my legendary brain game down on him with my finest skills and he repaid me by sucking my clit until I screamed so loud I knew damn well his mama was woke! Quai sucked my toes, licked my back, and my ass too, and I had to admit he was a contender for real. That boy had me sweating and moaning and sticky with cum when he finally told me to look up and smile.

“Say ‘brainiac’ baby,” he clowned.

I lifted my sweaty face toward the camera and stuck both my middle fingers up in the air, then grabbed the Patrón and quenched my thirst.

Fucking around with Quai had been a whole lotta fun, but now I was trying to get with Free. I could tell the nigga was ducking and dodging me and I was right at the point where I decided I was gonna call him one more damn time, and if he played me, I’d give Quaison a call and see what he had poppin’. His crib near Baruch Houses was straight hood, but inside it was pretty decent. Thanks to Free, I might have to make a move downtown instead of crosstown.

But Free surprised me and came by my apartment real early the next morning.

“Sorry I didn’t buzz you first,” he said, looking around like I mighta had a nigga stashed in the crib. He just didn’t know. Fucking him up in here is what had me scrambling for somewhere to stay now.

Free was driving his ugly Honda but I climbed in that baby like it was a Mercedes. It was barely seven o’clock in the morning and I was still tired. My head hurt and I felt dizzy from all the sticky I had smoked the night before. As soon as he took off driving I closed my eyes and crashed out, and when I woke up again Free was nudging my arm.

“Saucy,” he said. “It time to roll out. You aiight?”

I lifted my head and looked around.

“Damn,” he said and reached toward me. “You got some spit leaking out ya mouth, Mami. Lemme get that.”

I struggled to wake up as he wiped my mouth, then I stretched and sat all the way up. We were sitting in Free’s driveway, outside of that horrible little shack in Jersey. I really didn’t care where we were, it was too damn early and I was tired. I just wanted to go inside and crawl in the bed and crash.

As soon as we walked in the door I took off my shoes and stretched out on the sofa. Free cut on the miniature TV, but I wasn’t tryna strain my eyes looking at that shit. I dozed off again and when I woke up Free was standing in front of me holding out a plate of scrambled eggs and some toast.

“Damn, girl! You musta shut the damn club down last night. What time did you get home, five minutes before I rang your bell?”