Read Three Little Words Online
Authors: Susan Mallery
Isabel nodded slowly. “You’re right. But I can go slow.”
“Or you can start with an ass-kicking opening. I’m interested in helping. As a silent partner. I earned my money the old-fashioned way, and there’s plenty of it. If I’m going to be stuck in this town, then I might as well have fun. Working with you would give me that.”
How unexpected, Isabel thought. “Let’s schedule a meeting,” she said, thinking she could learn a lot from the woman. And not just about business.
* * *
K
ENT
DIDN
’
T
UNDERSTAND
what had happened. He’d returned from his math competition only to find Consuelo wasn’t taking his calls. He’d seen her in the grocery store last night, but she’d ducked out of sight before he could catch up with her.
The message was clear—she’d changed her mind about him. In the three days he’d been gone, she’d had time to think, and he wasn’t who or what she wanted.
The truth hurt, he admitted, as he pulled into the CDS parking lot. That night with her had been incredible. He’d thought...well, he’d thought a lot of things. Not just that they had chemistry, but that she cared about him. That she liked how they were together and that she wanted more of that.
But he’d been fooling himself. Or she’d figured out the truth. About him and about Lorraine.
Consuelo was sweet and kind despite her tough exterior. She was too nice to tell him what had happened, so she was avoiding him. While he wanted to keep his pride intact, he knew that the right thing to do was to man-up. He would say what had to be said and then let her get on with her life.
He found her in her office. The room was small and utilitarian. There were no feminine touches.
She looked up as he entered, her expression unreadable. He stepped into her office and closed the door behind him.
He’d imagined seeing her again so many times while he’d been gone. He’d pictured her rushing into his arms, holding him tight and never letting go. He’d thought about her having dinner with him and Reese, then sneaking in a few kisses after he drove her home. He’d hoped this weekend they would have a repeat performance of their last night together.
He wanted to be angry, but he knew the fault was his. Mistakes from the past had come back to haunt him.
“Hey,” he said as he took a seat. “How’s it going?”
“Fine.”
She looked tired. Or maybe he was seeing what he wanted to see. That she hadn’t been sleeping well because of the decision she had to make. The truth was probably much harsher—that she didn’t care enough to sweat his reaction.
“I know what you want to say,” he began, figuring there was no point in pretending otherwise. “You’re not interested in a regular guy like me. You thought you were, but all that danger and testosterone is more interesting than a man who teaches math to teenagers.”
Consuelo slowly rose to her feet. “What the hell are you talking about?”
He frowned. “You sound angry.”
“Of course I’m angry. I’m hurt and I should know better, right? The joke’s on me for thinking you were different.”
“Because of Lorraine.”
Her dark eyes widened. “Who is Lorraine? You disappeared for three days and then you
cheated?
”
“What? No. Lorraine is my ex.”
“You saw your ex?”
“Of course not. What are you talking about?”
“I get to ask the questions,” she snapped. “Where the hell have you been?”
“At a three-day retreat with my math class. Our first competition is next month.” He blinked. “I told you in the card I left for you. I stopped by on my way out of town. With everything that happened on our last night together, I couldn’t remember if I’d said anything or not. I didn’t want you to worry. We were in Sacramento. Sixteen kids and about that many parents.”
She pointed to her fairly clean desk. “There’s no card.”
Kent studied her for a second, hoping that maybe, just maybe, there’d been a misunderstanding. Something they could get over. Because having her stare at him with a combination of pain and loathing hurt him more than he’d thought possible.
He stood and crossed to the bulletin board by the door. He’d tacked a small envelope there. Now he pulled it free and handed it to her.
Her eyes widened as she stared at the writing on the front.
“You left me a note?” she asked, her voice oddly small.
He nodded.
“When?”
“The next morning.”
She opened it slowly and scanned the card inside. He knew the message explained about the math retreat and asked her to call him when she could.
Consuelo swallowed. “I didn’t know,” she breathed. “I thought you’d just disappeared. I thought you didn’t want...” She pressed her lips together. “Then if you didn’t break up with me, what are you talking about?”
He was still processing the new information. “You were avoiding me because you thought I hadn’t called?”
She nodded.
“I’d never do that.”
“That’s what I thought. So I couldn’t believe I’d been wrong about you.” He started toward her, but she shook her head. “No. Tell me what you were going to say before.”
He swore silently. “I thought you were avoiding me because you’d figured out I wasn’t that interesting. That you were disappointed it took me so long to get over my ex-wife. I couldn’t face the fact that I was wrong about her. I fell in love with her. I asked her to marry me. I had a child with her and then she left. She walked out on me and on Reese. I get leaving the marriage, but her own kid?”
He started to turn away but knew he had to face her. Had to be completely honest.
“I was forced to realize I’d been an idiot from the beginning. That everything about our marriage was a sham. I was hurt and embarrassed and struggling with being a single dad. I didn’t want to face my mistakes, so it was easier to tell everyone I was waiting for Lorraine to come back. Then it became a pattern, and I didn’t know how to break it. I couldn’t get over her until I was willing to admit the truth about her. About us. And that took longer than it should have.”
“How did you finally move on?”
“I guess I got tired of whining,” he admitted. “I accepted I’d made a bad decision, did my best to learn from it and prepared to start dating again. What I couldn’t prepare for was meeting you.”
Her dark gaze never left his face. She drew in a breath, but didn’t speak. He knew it was all up to him.
“Look at you,” he said, smiling at her. “You’re tough and sweet. You care about my kid. You’re fair. You don’t take anybody’s shit. But you’re patient with the little kids. Reese talks about how you’ll spend a full ten minutes in the middle of class to help a student who’s scared.”
He managed a slight smile. “I like that you could take my brother. He needs that in his life.”
The corner of her mouth twitched, but she didn’t speak.
“I know there’s stuff in your past,” he continued. “I know you did things—some unspeakable things—to help our country, and that you’re as proud of that as you are scared to tell me the details.” He shrugged. “I’m sorry you went through that, but if you’re waiting for me to judge you, you’ve got the wrong guy. I won’t. Not ever.”
He thought about his past, how he’d taken the easy road. The one without risk. Maybe it was all so he could come to this moment.
“I know it’s fast and you have no reason to believe me, but I love you, Consuelo. I want you in my life, and I want to be in yours. I want to love you and take care of you for as long as you’ll have me. I want us...” He sucked in a breath. “Okay, it’s too soon to say the rest of what I want, but you get the idea. If you’re interested.”
She stared at him for a long time before launching herself around the desk and into his arms. He caught her as she rushed him, hauling her against his chest. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist; then she started to kiss him.
“I thought you’d left me,” she admitted. “I was never going to fall in love, and you broke my heart.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No. It was me. I should have called and talked to you. I shouldn’t have been so afraid.” She stared into his eyes. “It’s just I’ve never known anyone like you. I’m so scared you’re going to figure out that you can do better and then you’ll be gone.”
“Never,” he promised, then kissed her.
She kissed him back, holding on so tight he knew she would never let go.
She raised her head, her eyes bright with tears. “Yes,” she whispered. “Yes, I love you, and yes, when it’s time, let’s have that other conversation. But for now, we’ll hang out and have lots of sex.”
He started to laugh then, because how on earth a guy like him found a woman like her was beyond him. But he’d been lucky and he planned to spend the rest of his life being very, very grateful.
* * *
“Y
OU
’
RE
AN
INCURABLE
slob,” Isabel said to herself as she picked up a monster-truck magazine and two coffee cups. They’d been left in the living room, along with a lot of other stuff belonging to Ford. She put the magazine on the shelf under the coffee table and carried the mugs into the kitchen.
The man could barbecue, he could make her laugh and cause her to see stars in bed, but he left a trail of crap wherever he went. A small price to pay, she thought, nearly tripping over a pair of boots by the bathroom.
She carried the boots into the bedroom.
Sometime in the past few weeks, Ford had basically moved in with her. They were together every night, and somehow his clothes had started appearing in her closets and drawers. She would give him credit for doing the laundry. At least twice a week she came home to a freshly washed and folded pile of panties and bras. Her towels were always clean, as was the bathroom, now that she thought about it.
She set his boots in the closet and pushed them forward so she could close the door. Only they wouldn’t move. Something was in the way. She saw his duffel and shifted it. The zipper was open and a banded stack of letters tumbled to the carpet.
Isabel immediately recognized her own handwriting. She reached for the letters and undid the elastic band. The envelopes fanned out in her hand.
These were from when she was in high school, she thought. She bent down and saw three more banded groups of envelopes in his duffel. All her letters? Was it possible he’d kept them?
She sank onto the carpet and opened the top letter. The first thing she noticed was how worn the paper was. The seams where it had been folded were practically translucent. Some of the individual words had faded, and there were smudges on the side from being held.
Every one of them looked the same. Worn, well read. As if Ford had pored over them a dozen times. No, a hundred. She’d often wondered if he even cared that she wrote, but now she saw that somehow she’d connected with him.
She scanned the contents of the pages, wincing as she saw hearts in the margins or a particularly hideous picture spilling out. She heard footsteps and looked up. Ford stood in the bedroom.
“I was such a kid,” she said, waving the letters. “How did you stand it?”
“I liked them. I watched you grow up.” He gave her a slow smile. “You turned out good.”
He stood there all tall and broad. He wore cargo pants and a black T-shirt. Very “mercenary does Fool’s Gold.” He was tough and sweet, and she’d fallen for him weeks ago. Between then and now had simply been an attempt to avoid the obvious.
She scrambled to her feet and put the letters on her dresser. “So I have some news.”
He leaned in and kissed her. “New lip gloss? What’s the flavor?”
She stepped back. “This is serious.”
“So’s your lip gloss. Is it piña colada?”
“Yes, now listen. I’m staying.”
He looked at her as if he hadn’t understood what she’d said.
“I’m staying in Fool’s Gold. I’m going to expand Paper Moon and add a boutique.” She drew in a breath. “Obviously Sonia is a big part of why, but you are, too. I know this was just supposed to be pretend. But it’s not. At least not for me.” She twisted her fingers together.
“I’m in love with you, Ford. I think I have been since I was fourteen. At the very least, I’ve been waiting for you to come back. Or us to find each other. Either way, I love you.”
She had more she wanted to say, more she wanted to hear, but she didn’t get the chance. The affection fled his face and suddenly she was staring at the surprised features of an uncomfortable stranger.
He didn’t say anything. Not a single word. Instead he turned on his heel and walked out of the room. A few seconds later, the front door of the house closed and she was alone.
CHAPTER TWENTY
I
SABEL
WAS
UNAWARE
of the specifics when it came to the passage of time. She went through nights and days, she showed up at work and apparently made sense, but she wasn’t really there. Fortunately, there were no big decisions to be made, no orders to get right. She oversaw fittings and suggested veils and smiled when Madeline talked, but it was as if it were happening to someone else.
Friday she closed the store at six and headed home. The days were getting a little shorter. Lights were on in several of the houses in her neighborhood. She could see happy families gathering in kitchens and family rooms. But when she got to her house, it was dark. No lights, no Jeep with painted flames. Just a silent, empty house.
Ford was gone. He hadn’t said anything and then he’d left. She’d said the words he hadn’t wanted to hear, and she’d lost him forever.
She walked up the driveway, toward the back door. It was open, as always. Because this was Fool’s Gold and nothing bad ever happened here.
Only it had.
She walked into the kitchen and set her purse on the counter. After changing into jeans and a long-sleeved T-shirt, she started back toward the kitchen. Only once she got there, she didn’t want to eat. She sighed. Maybe having a broken heart would get rid of those stubborn ten pounds she was always trying to lose.
Someone knocked on the front door. She walked through the house knowing there was no way it was Ford. He would simply walk in the back, as he always did. Something else he wouldn’t be doing again. Something else she would have to get used to.
She opened the door and saw Jo standing there with a blender under each arm.
“Hey,” her friend said. “We heard and we’re here. I have a new recipe for rum slushies. I think they’re going to be a hit.”
Before Isabel could ask what was going on, over a dozen women spilled into the house, and everyone was carrying either food or alcohol.
Felicia followed with Dellina and Annabelle. Charlie ushered in Madeline, who hesitated.
“I’m the one who told,” she confessed.
Charlie nodded. “Madeline called and said what had happened.” She smiled at Madeline. “You would have been a lousy firefighter, but I hear you sell a mean dress and you’re an excellent friend.”
Isabel looked at Madeline. “How did you know?”
Madeline shrugged. “I’ve never seen you look so sad and broken. I didn’t know what to do, so I phoned Charlie. She arranged all this.”
Isabel felt herself fighting tears. She walked over to Madeline and hugged her, then turned to Charlie and did the same. The taller woman held her tight.
“All men are assholes,” Charlie assured her.
“Not Clay.”
“He’s an exception, but we aren’t here to talk about him.”
Isabel stepped back and nodded. She knew that most of the women in the room would claim their husband or fiancé was an exception, but she was okay with that. Just because her heart was broken didn’t mean the rest of the world couldn’t be happy.
Maeve waddled in, looking more pregnant every time Isabel saw her. “He’s an idiot,” her sister said, hugging her. “I’m here for you.”
“Thanks.”
As always, Jo set up a bar in the kitchen. Drinks were poured, food dished and laid out. There were plates of brownies, plenty of cookies and ice cream. For the salty snackers, bowls of chips and dip were scattered around the living room. The blender went on and off with great regularity, and everyone declared the rum slushies a hit.
By her second one, Isabel went from crushed to crushed and buzzed, which turned out to be a better place. Somewhere around seven-thirty, Consuelo and Taryn walked in.
Consuelo rushed to Isabel’s side. “I’m sorry,” she said, sitting next to her on the sofa. “I just got the message. I had my phone turned off.”
“Enjoying a little new-boyfriend fun?” Dellina asked, then slapped her hand over her mouth. “Sorry.”
Isabel shook her head and smiled. “No. Don’t be sorry. We are going to drink to my friend and her official relationship with Kent. Because I love you enough to want you to be happy.”
Consuelo hugged her. “I can seriously hurt Ford, if you want. I know his vulnerabilities.”
“Maybe later,” Isabel said, determined to get through the evening without humiliating herself.
Her house was filled with people who obviously cared about her. Whatever she needed, they would provide. She only had to ask. They would be here for her. She was lucky. She only wished it was enough.
Taryn—still stunning in tight-fitting jeans, a silk blouse and boots—strolled over. “I’m confused. I was told to show up, but the reason is unclear.”
“Ford dumped her,” Charlie said. “He’s such an idiot.”
Taryn sat on the coffee table in front of Isabel. “Seriously? I’ve seen you two together. I would swear he was completely into you.”
“I think he was,” Isabel said, not sure if talking about it made her feel better or worse. “We were having a great time together. I’m the one who changed the rules.”
“Did he freak out when he learned you were staying?” Taryn asked. “Men are so damned delicate. I swear, you wouldn’t believe the trouble I have with the boys.”
“That was part of it.” Isabel drew in a breath. Maybe if she told them what had happened, she could begin to heal the gaping hole in her chest.
“I told him I loved him.”
The room went quiet. She felt everyone looking at her. She drew in a breath and continued.
“I wrote him letters from the time I was fourteen until I was twenty-four. He was in the military, and I thought I loved him, so I wrote letters. They were silly. I was a kid, and he never answered. But writing them kept him alive in my head, if that makes sense.”
Patience nodded. “Of course it does. I’m sure he appreciated them.”
“I don’t know. He kept them. I found them the other day. They were worn, as if he’d read them a hundred times.”
Several women sighed.
“I realized I belonged here. In Fool’s Gold and with Ford. So I told him I wasn’t leaving and that I was in love with him. And then he left.”
She felt the first tear slip down her cheek.
Consuelo grabbed her free hand. “What did he say?”
“Nothing. He turned and left without a word.”
“I raised him better than that.”
Isabel pulled her hand free and wiped her face, then looked up to see Denise Hendrix walking toward her. Ford’s sisters were with his mother, and they all looked sad and upset.
“I’m sorry,” Denise said. “I heard what happened. I hope you don’t mind me coming to see you.”
“No, of course not.” It was a little strange, but Isabel had enough rum slushie in her not to worry about a detail like that.
Denise took a chair close to the sofa. “I’m sorry for not believing you. I didn’t think you and Ford really were seeing each other. I thought it was an elaborate scheme so I’d stop bugging him.”
Isabel’s eyes widened. “It was,” she admitted.
Denise looked more pleased than upset. “I knew it!” She sighed. “Now I know why you were avoiding me and our tea. Your excuses were starting to get elaborate.” She patted Isabel’s arm. “I have six children. It takes a lot to fool me.”
“I’m sorry,” Isabel murmured, fighting tears again. “I should have come to see you while I still could. Now I’m not with Ford and...” She held in a sob.
Denise hugged her. “I’m sorry my son is an idiot.”
“Me, too.”
“None of this would have happened if the three of you hadn’t bugged him about getting married,” Nevada muttered. “Now Isabel’s hurt and Ford is gone.”
Isabel turned to Consuelo. “He’s gone?”
Her friend shifted on the sofa. “Not permanently. He took a couple of days off. He said he needed to clear his head.” Consuelo looked at her. “He’ll be back.”
“Ford is unlikely to walk away from the business,” Felicia offered. “He enjoys his work. He’s settled into the town. I’m surprised he would leave you. From the empirical evidence, I would think he was very fond of you.” She paused. “Am I not helping?”
Isabel started to laugh. “You’re helping a lot. All of you.”
She had this, she reminded herself. Her friends, who loved her. Family, a business she was excited about. As for Ford, she would get over him. Eventually.
* * *
T
HE
CABIN
BY
L
AKE
T
AHOE
had enough of the basics to be comfortable. Most of the time there was electricity. The large open room contained two sets of extra-long bunk beds, a table and chairs, most of a kitchen and a big sofa. There was a wide front porch with chairs and a view of the lake. The area was beautiful, quiet and isolated. Ford cared only about the last two, but the view was nice when he bothered to look.
He owned the cabin with several buddies. They came up here when they needed to get away. When life was too stressful or after one of those missions that came with ghosts. But even after three days, he couldn’t seem to find what he was looking for.
Whoever he’d been was gone. Isabel had changed him, and he couldn’t go back to who he’d been. He also didn’t know how to move forward, which left him in a hell of a pickle.
He knew he missed her. Missed her more than he’d thought possible. More than he’d ever missed anyone. He needed her to breathe, and right now he was a man gasping for air.
But... Always but. How could he be with her? She deserved so much more than he had to offer. She needed someone to love her and cherish her. He wanted to say he could do it, but he’d never really loved anyone. Never wanted to stay. When the woman got serious, he got gone. His current location illustrated his inability to break the pattern.
He heard the sound of a truck in the distance. The intrusion wasn’t completely unexpected. He’d known someone would come looking for him. He rose and stretched, then walked down the two steps leading to the gravel driveway and rounded the corner.
Only the guy getting out of the truck wasn’t Angel or Gideon. It wasn’t even Justice. Instead Leonard stood by the truck, a small suitcase in one hand.
Unexpected, Ford thought, returning to the cabin. He pulled a second beer out of the refrigerator and took it out to Leonard. Then he sat in his chair and propped his feet up on the railing.
The lake was the deepest blue he’d ever seen. The leaves had all changed and nearly half were gone. Winter was coming. Not this week, but soon.
Leonard dumped his suitcase in the cabin, then took the seat next to Ford’s. He picked up the beer and twisted off the cap, then took a seat.
“You ready to talk?” Leonard asked.
“Nope.”
By the next afternoon, Leonard was obviously frustrated enough to spit nails. Ford was impressed he’d lasted as long as he had. Just sitting. When it had gotten dark, the two men had gone inside, and Ford had grilled a couple of steaks he’d bought at a store off the main highway. They’d eaten in silence, then listened to the radio before going to bed.
But now Leonard was squirming in his seat.
“I’m not going to just
sit
here,” he said, glaring at Ford. “I have a family to get home to.”
Ford nodded toward the driveway. “I’m not keeping you.”
“I’m not leaving without you.”
Ford settled more deeply into his chair. “Then you have a problem.”
Leonard got up. He’d put on a little muscle, but was still scrawny. Still, he was a good man, and Ford appreciated the effort.
“I’m fine,” he said. “You don’t have to worry about me.”
Leonard pushed up his glasses and glared at him. “I’m not here about you. I’m here because of Isabel.”
Ford did his best not to wince at the name. Hearing it made him think about her, which made him ache. Not that he’d been able to forget her for even a second, but still.
“You’re walking away from the best thing that ever happened to you,” Leonard told him. “Being a part of something important—a family—is what life’s about. You could marry her, be a father. Why would you ever want to turn away from that?”
Ford studied the man. Leonard was telling the truth as he knew it. For him, Maeve and the kids were everything. Ford respected that, even if he would never have it for himself.
“You have a real chance with Isabel,” Leonard continued. “But it’s not just her I’m worried about. Maeve isn’t happy.” Leonard puffed out his chest. “I’m willing to do anything to make Maeve happy.”
Ford straightened in his seat. He believed Leonard. Love gave a man courage where he didn’t have a right to any. Leonard would take him on because it was the right thing to do.
“You’re a better man than I’ll ever be,” he said, rising. “But I’m not going back.”
“Why not?”
“I’m not like you. You’re right. What I have with Isabel is more than I deserve. She’s my fantasy come to life. She’s adorable and funny and sweet, but I don’t love her. I can’t. I’ve never been in love with anyone. I just don’t have whatever it takes to have those feelings.”