Three Sides of the Tracks (4 page)

5

Hallway

Caroline saw Danny first, walking down the hall in her direction. She
waited in a side hall, grabbed his sleeve as he passed and pulled him away from
the crowd. She put her arms around his neck and hugged him. “I am sooo sorry
about yesterday. Is your mother okay? Are you okay? I never did find out
exactly what happened. I was so mad at my daddy that I left and started walking
home. He caught up with me and literally threw me into the car. We had a big
fuss. I mean a big fuss. I hate him so,” Caroline said. It all came out in a
rush.

Danny hugged her back and smiled that slow smile of his. “It’s not your
fault, Caroline. I’ve known how he is for a long time now, so, hey, no big
surprise to me.”

Caroline squeezed him tighter. “I can’t stand for you to be hurt. You’re
so sweet.”

“Don’t say that too loud. You might ruin my reputation,” Danny said with
a grin, then seemed to catch himself and lowered his head.

Caroline grabbed his chin and lifted his head. “How many times do I have
to tell you that your lip is not that noticeable? Now stop it. No one even
notices or thinks about it anymore . . . except you. If you‘d stop acting
self-conscious, it wouldn’t even be an issue,” she said, a scolding tone in her
voice and eyebrows raised.

“Yeah, I’m a real ladies’ man. I hear people talking, Caroline.
Whispering behind my back.”

An indignant expression came to Caroline’s face, and she put her hands on
her hips. “Uh huh, if you’re so unpopular, how is it you have a date with
Teresa Woods for the dance Friday night?”

Danny looked surprised. “Wow, word sure gets around fast.”

Caroline gave him a worried look. “Sure she’s not a little too hot for
you? Not good looking hot, but, oh, you know what ‘hot’ I mean.”

Danny couldn’t resist teasing her. “Well, maybe that’s the ‘hot’ I’m
looking for,” he said with a confidence the expression on his face belied.

Caroline’s mood changed abruptly. Her tongue began running around and pushing
against the inside of her cheek, a quirk she’d acquired long ago and that only
occurred when she was really worried or nervous. And she had more on her mind
than Teresa Woods this morning. She decided she wasn’t ready to talk with
anybody about it, even Danny.

“Caroline.”

“Caroline,” Danny said again a little louder.

Caroline looked up. “Oh, sorry. I was just thinking—”

“Yes, I know,” Danny said and chuckled. “You were doing your tongue thing
again.”

Caroline punched his arm. “You just watch yourself. I’ll see you later,”
she said and pecked him on the cheek. “Oh, and you’d better mix a little
algebra into your thinking before Friday too. Call if you need me, but don’t
wait till Thursday night. I want to get
some
sleep.” Caroline said the
latter with feigned annoyance, but there was some truth to it. She’d been
Danny’s unofficial tutor since shortly after that eventful day in the third
grade.

She couldn’t figure it out. He knew things she’d never even heard of,
probably because he read all the time, all types of books except of course
those on the subjects he was supposed to be studying. But he was always on the
cusp of failing one or two classes, and she would have to rescue him with
all-night tutoring sessions, sometimes several nights, depending on how far
behind he was, which further befuddled her. He learned in a few nights what had
been taught in several weeks of classes.

As they grew older, Caroline would tell Danny which girls had a crush on
him, and he would do the same.

Danny knew Caroline didn’t really disapprove of Teresa Woods despite her
facetious warning. If she had, her usual disapproving response would have been
to pay the girl in question a vaguely flattering compliment, something along
the lines of, “Oh her; yes, she does well in English class.” Danny could only
guess at Caroline’s real reason because she would never say anything bad about
the person.

Caroline’s thoughts were elsewhere as she walked past a doorway and
collided with another student. She fell backwards, her books tumbling to the
floor.

A strong hand reached around her waist and pulled her upright.

It took a moment for Caroline to regain her senses. She looked into hazel
eyes that, presently, seemed amused.

“I’m so sorry,” Caroline said to the young man, who stood calmly, still
holding his books in one arm.

“No harm. You’re in a hurry, I suppose.”

“Not a hurry, no. Thinking about something instead of watching where I
was going.”

 Caroline waited for a response, but he just smiled and looked at her
calmly.

He reached out his hand. “I’m Richard Turner. The new guy.”

Caroline took the offered hand, which was strong and rough, surprisingly
so since he was so well dressed and groomed. He didn’t look the type to have
rough calloused hands. “Yes, I know who you are. Benton’s rather small as you
know. You’re the first new person in quite a while.”

Caroline didn’t add that what she meant was that he was the first
interesting
new person. Good looking, seemingly self-assured, and drove a new Mustang
convertible.

“I’m sort of used to it. My father works for Raytheon, and we’ve moved
around quite a bit. Being the new guy seems more the norm than anything.”

“Oh, that’s terrible. Not having friends, I mean. I mean . . . not that
you don’t have friends, but that you don’t have long-time friends who you’ve
grown up with. I would really miss that.” Caroline felt pangs of sympathy.

“That’s very empathetic. I appreciate you saying that, but I guess one
doesn’t miss what one hasn’t ever had. I’ve felt pretty bad having to leave a
few people. But we stay in touch. Of course, it’s not the same thing. Knowing
people for years must be very special.”

“Have you made any friends here yet?”

“No. I’ve learned not to be pushy. When people get over whatever they go
through when someone or something different comes into their lives, they’ll let
me know.”

Caroline didn’t quite know what to make of that. She offered her hand
again. “Well, you’ve just met someone who’s over whatever it is you’re talking
about,” she said with a grin. “I’m Caroline.”

Richard grinned back. “Richard Turner,” in case you didn’t get it the
first time. His grin was disarming.

A hand from behind gripped her arm with alarming strength. “You don’t
need any new friends, Caroline,” a husky voice said.

Another meaty hand shoved Richard against the lockers. “I’d better not
see you touch her again, shaking hands, picking up books—I don’t care what it
is. You two ain’t friends. Ain’t gonna be friends. You got that?” Thurston
Howard said, glaring at Richard.

Richard regained his balance and faced Thurston, who weighed 220 pounds
and was six feet three-inches tall. He played linebacker for the football team,
and his nasty streak wasn’t confined to the field.

“I said, you got that?” Thurston poked Richard with his finger as he
spoke, but Richard just returned Thurston’s glare with a calm expression.

Caroline twisted out of his grasp. “Let go of me. You’re hurting my arm.”

Thurston let go and nodded toward Richard with his strong and slightly
whiskery jaw. “Don’t be gettin’ all huggy huggy with the new boy here then.
Let’s go. You can walk me to my class.”

Thurston grabbed her arm again and steered Caroline away before she had a
chance to say anything else to Richard.

They walked in silence until well away from Richard, then Thurston began
messaging Caroline’s arm. “I didn’t hurt you, did I, baby?” he asked in a
tender tone. Tender for him, that is.

“Of course you did, Thurston. You don’t know how strong you are. Or don’t
care,” she added after a moment’s reflection.

Thurston banged a locker with his fist. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Caroline stopped dead in her tracks. She took a deep breath. This episode
made the decision she worried about earlier easier to deal with. She knew she
had to do it. “I mean that I want to break up, Thurston. It’s not about what
just happened. I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately. I want to date other
people. This is our last year in high school, and I want to date other people.”

“So the new boy turned your head, huh? Fancy car. Smooth talking.”

Caroline smiled. “Thurston, I
just
met ‘the new boy.’ I don’t even
know him, much less thought about going out with him. No, I don’t have anyone
special in mind. I just don’t want to be obligated, to be tied down.”

 Thurston exploded again. His fist slammed into the lockers again. “You
can’t break up with me, Caroline. We’re
supposed
to be together. We
belong together. You’re the best looking girl in school, and I’m the best
looking—”

“The best looking guy,” Caroline interrupted. “That is sooo you,
Thurston.”

She laid a hand on his shoulder. “Thurston, it’s really not anybody else.
You’re sweet,” she lied, “and we’ve had fun, but I never made any promises to
you. I really do want to date other people. You can do the same. Lots—”

“I don’t want to date other girls.
You’re
my girl,” he said,
taking a step closer, his face an inch from hers and spit flying from his
mouth. “You’d better not try dating anybody else; I’m telling you,” he said
grabbing Caroline’s hand and wrist, squeezing it so tightly the hand turned
red. He twisted her wrist a final time then slung her arm away and stalked off,
his fists denting lockers along the way.

Caroline’s tongue ran rings around the inside of her mouth as she
collapsed against the locker. She was afraid he would react like this and
blamed herself for the bad timing. She should have waited or done it earlier.

She was already thirty minutes late for her next class. Might as well not
go, not for the last 30 minutes. She sagged against the locker and thought
about what Thurston might do.

She was still leaning against the lockers lost in thought when the bell
rang and classes let out. It was lunchtime, and she ambled toward the doorway.
She had to get outside, get some air.

Her legs unconsciously took her toward the cluster of trees on the other
side of the parking lot. The cars hid her from view when she plopped down on
the soft grass and folded her legs beneath her.

Thurston was crazy. He fought with the other boys all the time. Beat them
up was more like it. Hardly anyone was as big as him, and the ones who were
didn’t have anything like his personality. He bullied everyone. How had she
gotten into this mess? Why did she ever agree to go out with him the first
time? He’d charmed her, that’s how, she remembered. Sweet at first. Or made her
think he was, under the tough exterior. He really knew how to get his way. On
their first date, he told her about how much money he’d spent on concert
tickets for the show the next weekend. She’d already mentioned how much she
liked the band. He catered to her. Held open the car door. Brought her flowers.
Never talked about himself, just seemed concerned with her.

Gradually, the doors stopped being opened. Her opinion mattered less and
less. She was stupid if she didn’t agree with him. Disloyal if she didn’t want
to go where he wanted, such as some car race or fighting match in Atlanta. All
of a sudden, she was dumb, a loser, someone who couldn’t think for herself.
She’d never measure up to him. She’d better let him make all the decisions.
Little by little, she went into a shell but put on a front for her friends. He
took pleasure in embarrassing her in front of them, humiliating her. He had a
manner, something that intimidated the others to keep them from coming to her
defense. Some indiscernible way of making others think they needed his
approval. She supposed underneath it all was his threat of physical violence.
People were just plain afraid of him.

A book of matches landed in her lap and made her jump.

“Hey, gorgeous, got a light?”

Danny leaned against a car, grinning.

Caroline leaped from the ground and ran to him. Her arms encircled his
neck, and she began sobbing.

Danny massaged her back and stayed quiet until Caroline’s tears began to
slow. “Who’s messing with my girl,” he whispered, cradling her head against
his.

“Oh, it’s that Thurston,” she replied in a hopeless tone, her voice still
shaky.

“I thought y’all were tight.”

“No, Danny, it’s been bad for a long time. You just haven’t been around
to see it,” she said, meaning that, besides their own special relationship, she
and Danny didn’t hang around with the same group of people.

“Well, why didn’t you tell me? You know you can come to me with anything.
I would you.”

“Yes, yes, I know. I mean, I would, but it’s not like that. I didn’t know
myself. Not until recently. I’ve been so down in the dumps and working so hard not
to let anybody see it, that I just got lost myself.”

“Then I heard something on TV, read something; oh, I don’t know, just
lots of things came together, and I realized something: I had become a victim.”

Danny grabbed her shoulders, and his eyes flared as they pierced hers.
“What do you mean? You’ve never been a victim in all the time I’ve known you.”

“I know. I know. It hasn’t seemed that way. And it wasn’t, to a certain
extent. What I mean is that you know how my daddy is always bullying people
around and being the big show? Belittling other people to make himself feel
bigger?”

Danny looked into Caroline’s red-streaked eyes, glistening from the
tears. “Yeah, I think I’ve got a handle on that.”

“Well, I’ve been reading and listening to people on TV, and they say
people who come under the influence of people like that seem to self-perpetuate
that life and end up with people who are just the same, who abuse you and make
you feel small.”

“Caroline, you’ve never seemed small to me. You’ve always seemed better
than anyone else. Not that you act that way, but just that you are.”