Three Way (9 page)

‘Oh dear. Do you find the stalker thing works?’ he says. Julie laughs again.

‘Brilliant. Just brilliant.’

Thursday. Day off. I have no plans and it feels great. I’m going to lie in, have a late breakfast and spend the rest of the day doing nothing but watching TV. Except, of course, none of that is anything remotely like what actually happens.

From somewhere deep in my subconscious I hear the toilet door bang shut. I’m awake, staring at the inside of my eyelids. I hear someone straining and obviously having difficulty, judging by the huffing and puffing now emanating around the flat. Parker. I hear him whisper the word ‘Christ’ followed by more huffing. I pull the pillow over my head, not wishing to be any more involved than I already am. Definitely quieter under the pillow. Then a noise that sounds suspiciously like my door opening. I wait, my heart suddenly pumping hard. Nothing. I push the pillow to one side and look over to the door. The silhouette of Ashley fills the doorframe, her hand on her hip.

‘What?’ I say.

‘Do I seriously have to listen to that?’ she says.

‘Urgh, what do you want me to do? The guy’s got to take a shit.’

‘Not like that he doesn’t.’ I huff and pull the cover off. I’m wearing only a shrunk-in-the-wash pair of boxers but modesty is the last thing on my mind. I walk past Ashley, wiping some sleep from my eye and head to the toilet. I knock on the door.

‘Parker?’ I say.

‘What?’ he replies, surprise and mild indignation in his voice.

‘Can you just…try and keep it down?’

‘I’m taking a dump,’ he says, as if no further explanation is necessary.

‘Yeah I know, but so do next door so, could you just, try and do it…a bit quieter.’

‘Fucking hell man, what is this Nazi shit? Can’t a guy unload any more without an interrogation by the Hayward Gestapo?’

‘No, I’m just saying-’

‘Uh hold on…’ he says. I glance at Ashley, she’s scrunched her face up and looks suitably disgusted. I shrug and head back towards my bedroom.

‘Uh God,’ Parker says.

‘Oh man,’ Ashley says and walks back to the living room, shutting the door behind her.

‘Can we talk about this later, please? I really need to concentrate,’ says Parker.

‘Definitely. Forget I said anything,’ I reply.

‘What?’ he asks.

‘I said don’t worry about it,’ I say, louder. I shake my head and go back to bed. Well, Ashley’s perked up a bit and all it took was Parker going to the toilet. Saying that, there are many things I don’t want to be woken up by and this is definitely near the top.

I manage to go back to sleep. When I do finally surface, the time is just past eleven. I get dressed and walk into the living room, Ashley isn’t there. Parker sits on the sofa watching TV, still in his…I wouldn’t call them pyjamas…night clothes? He cradles a cup of coffee.

‘Morning,’ I say.

‘Hi,’ he replies ‘want some coffee?’

‘Nah.’ I slump down on the chair. ‘Where’s Ash?’

‘Said she had to go to work,’ Parker replies.

‘Work?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Where’s that?’

‘How the fuck should I know? What am I, her diary PA?’

‘Easy.’

‘My guess is she sells her body,’ he says. I glance at my watch.

‘Bit early.’

‘Maybe she enjoys her job.’

‘Careful now,’ I say. We sit watching yet another repeat of Top Gear. I’m not in the mood. ‘You done anything constructive today?’

‘I’m psyching myself up to it,’ Parker replies. ‘How’d it go with that girl?’

‘Okay, yeah.’

‘Okay? Just okay? What happened, you find out she meant another Ollie Hayward?’

‘Funny. No, I…sort of wrote her an email.’

‘Sort of wrote her an email? And?’

‘Well, let’s just say I don’t expect to hear from her again.’ Parker laughs.

‘You’re such a fuck up.’

‘I know, it’s pathetic.’

‘Next time you want advice about girls, ask me.’

‘Or I could try not asking you and see if that works out better.’ Parker ignores me and carries on watching. I stand up.

‘Well this is dull, I’m going to the supermarket. Want anything?’ I ask.

‘How about a flatmate that doesn’t talk to me during my favourite show?’ he replies.

‘You are such a shitkicker, it’s not even funny,’ I say, grabbing my coat from the door. ‘If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer,’ I say, a vague attempt at movie quoting. Parker ignores me. I walk out, mildly disappointed.

As I reach the end of my road I start to regret not wearing my rain jacket. It’s July, it should be hot and sunny. Instead it looks like it’s going to hurl down. Saying that, however, it feels good to be out in the fresh air. Or as fresh as air gets in South London. I walk briskly towards Northcote Road then turn left.

I make my way towards Clapham Junction as the first spots of rain start to patter on my shoulder. I cross Falcon Road and wait for the lights to change. It’s at that moment the deluge starts. What started as a few drops quickly becomes a cascade. In the Amazon I’m sure the locals would have glanced up and thought ‘huh, minor shower.’ In London, people run for cover. It feels apocalyptic. As I watch people scurry to find shelter, I quickly realise I’m not one of them and I’m getting drenched in the downpour. My brain shifts into gear and I sprint across the road and straight into the Snail and Tomato pub. It’s quiet for a weekday afternoon but people are muttering and staring at the rain. An old man in a tweed coat takes one look at me and says

‘Bet you wished you brought an umbrella. You’re drenched son.’

‘Thanks for that, old man I don’t know,’ I reply. Except, of course, I don’t say that. I think it and, with a big smile say, ‘Yeah.’

I glance at the window, the rain isn’t going to stop any time soon. I turn around and walk to the bar. The barmaid has her back to me, loading bottles of beer into fridges. I cough. She finishes the box , stands and turns around. It’s Ashley. Her eyes widen when she sees me.

‘Ollie? What are you doing here?’ she asks.

‘Ash? I was on my way to the supermarket. This is where you work?’ I reply. She glances down.

‘Just until I get back on my feet, I want to pay you rent and I can’t do that sitting in the flat.’

‘You don’t have to pay rent, you’re a guest.’

‘No. I’m not going to just take a handout. I want to pay my way. Look, it’s not bad, I meet lots of sexy guys.’ I smile.

‘Really?’

‘No. They’re letchy and obnoxious. But it’s money and that’s what I need right now.’

‘Fair enough.’

‘You get caught by the storm?’

‘No I fell into a swimming pool,’ I reply, glancing down. Her eyebrows rise at my sarcasm.

‘You want a coffee or something? Warm you up? I can sit with you for a bit, I’m due a break anyway.’

‘Okay, yeah sure.’

‘Take a seat.’

I squelch over to a table and sit down. I watch Ashley move swiftly as she prepares the coffees. It looks like she knows where things are. I wonder how long she’s been working here. Her hair is tied back in a ponytail and she wears a white apron. Her blouse is undone revealing a little cleavage and she is wearing more makeup than normal. She looks good. Sexy. She glances over to me, I look down and pull out my phone pretending to check my email. I hear china cups placed on saucers and look up. She lifts her tray and walks around the bar towards me. She places the tray on the table and sits down opposite.

‘Day off today?’ she asks, taking one of the cups and passing it to me.

‘Yeah.’

‘So you thought you’d come see me. That’s nice.’

‘Yes, this was definitely a well thought out plan.’

‘I can understand why you sought me out. I am pretty amazing,’ she says, tearing a sugar sachet and pouring it into her cup. So the date went okay?’

‘I wondered how long it would be,’ I say.

‘I watched the DVD, she’s hot.’ I nearly spit coffee all over myself.

‘You watched the DVD of my interview. MY DVD?’

‘Yes. It was just lying there, I thought it was one of my music CD’s. Sorry, I didn’t realise it was a secret.’

‘It’s not but…doesn’t matter.’

‘I have to say burning a DVD of an interview with a girl you’ve just met is a bit disturbing but she is stunning.’ I don’t say anything, maybe the shock of her finding and watching my DVD. ‘So did it go okay, the date?’

‘It was more like a work gathering that I was invited to.’

‘Oh.’

‘But yes it went fine. I think I’ve sort of fucked it up though. I sent her an email the other day which, God… it’s just embarrassing.’ She smiles.

‘Yeah? What did you write? Not ‘I love you.’’

‘No, I basically said I was available any day for the next month.’ She starts laughing.

‘Oh dear.’

‘And I signed it ‘Love Always.’’’

‘Oh Ollie.’

‘I know. She hasn’t responded. So that’s another one down the toilet. I’m such a fuckup when it comes to women,’ my voice falters slightly. She stops laughing suddenly when she picks up my tone. Her hand moves over mine.

‘Hey. You’re not a fuck up.’ She reaches over and pushes my chin up gently so my eyes meet hers. ‘So it didn’t work out with the Swedish one, just have to get back on the horse.’

‘I know. I need to get over her.’

‘What actually happened between you?’ she asks. I sigh heavily.

‘I dunno. I took her for granted. Wore her down. And one day she said she’d had enough. Enough of my selfishness. Of my moaning. Everything. I don’t know why I behaved like that. I loved her, we were together for two and a half years. The only girl I ever really loved.’ I look up and see a flash across Ashley’s face. ‘I mean, I love you Ash, but you know.’

‘I know what you mean.’

‘She moved all her stuff out. She cried. I cried. I tried to convince her to stay, told her I’d change and all that. She knew though. She knew I was desperate to hold on to her. And that’s what it was, I guess. I just wanted to keep her mine. I look back now and I can see there were so many things wrong with our relationship. Things I stopped her from doing. From being herself. She just went along with it most of the time. Didn’t complain. I guess she just got to the point where she couldn’t compromise herself any more. Don’t blame her really.’

‘Have you seen her since she moved out?’ I shake my head slowly, sit back and sniff the emotion back in, a vain attempt at pretending it doesn’t mean anything. ‘Sounds like you were a real dick,’ she says, softly. I look up, sudden annoyance in my heart from her lack of compassion. She stares at me with a serious face. I realise she’s just being honest. I look down.

‘I was,’ I say.

‘So, next time, don’t be. Be someone else. Be the person you want to be. And don’t be that moany, selfish fucker. Don’t let him out.’

‘Yeah. Sorry I… you’re working.’

‘I think you should call this girl and ask her out.’

‘After that email? She’ll think I’m stalking her.’

‘I doubt it. She called you first and that’s a sure sign she’s interested. You’d have to really fuck it up.’

‘I probably already have.’

‘Don’t be so down on yourself. Just give it a go.’ I nod and sniff again. ‘Hey?’ I look up, our eyes meet. She stares at me, then nods slowly. ‘She really got to you, huh?’ I try desperately not to let myself go. I can feel strong emotions swirling around inside my chest and it’s all I can do to stop myself from breaking down. I swallow and clear my throat looking at Ashley. Then something rises through me, a distant, familiar connection between us. I give her a simple smile. Slowly she leans in and kisses me. I’m suddenly right back in school. The ease of the kiss hits me instantly. Like home. Her lips, just as they were. Warm and good. I breathe in her smell, it fuses through me. Our kiss gets more intense suddenly. It’s no longer a feel-better kiss. Something more urgent is fighting its way through. I slow it down and pull my lips away carefully. We stare at each other, neither saying anything at first.