Thy Neighbor's Wife (25 page)

there unless she was getting herself a beer from the refrigerator.

Alex watched with a mixture of awe and envy as her best friend

wrapped her arms around Rita from behind, as the dark woman

stirred the contents of a pot on the stove. They stood like that,

swaying together slowly, making a striking contrast. Jackie was tall

and light, Rita was small and dark. Alex couldn’t help but think

how she and Jennifer would create a similar dichotomy. The love

her friends had for each other was so obvious, she could actually

feel it in the air. It made her at once happy for them and sad for her-

self.

“Can I set the table?” she asked suddenly, finding it hard to

breathe.

“Sure.”

She knew where everything was and helped herself to the place

settings and carried them into the dining room and away from the

sickening aura of love that threatened to suffocate her where she

Thy Neighbor’s Wife 133

stood.

Later, she sat back in her chair and patted her stuffed belly.

“Dinner was delicious, as always, though I was only expecting

drinks.” She let out a big sigh. “Honestly, I don’t know how you

two don’t weigh three hundred pounds.”

Jackie stood and collected the plates. “We find creative ways to

work it off.” She grinned, kissed Rita’s blushing cheek, and headed

into the kitchen.

Boy, things have obviously changed in the sex area around

here, Alex thought, surprised to find herself feeling bitter and envi-

ous.

“I all done,” Hannah said from her booster seat next to Alex.

“Good stuff ?” Alex asked.

“Yup.” The child’s plate was nearly empty and Alex wondered,

not for the first time, how Rita got so lucky as to give birth to a

child who ate almost everything.

“Good girl.” Getting the nod of approval from Rita, Alex

wiped the toddler clean, unfastened her bib and safety strap, and set

her on the floor. “Go make sure your mama is doing a good job on

those dishes,” she ordered, playfully swatting her behind.

“So,” Rita began, sipping her wine. “Let’s talk about your

book.”

Alex’s heart jumped. “Okay.” It must have been her fragile

writer’s ego that always made her so nervous when she was about to

get feedback from Rita. She was always terrified that one of these

times, Rita would turn into some cackling, witch-like creature

dressed in black who would loom high above her, laughing and

pointing and accusing Alex of having absolutely no writing talent

whatsoever. The image sent a shuddering chill along her spine every

time and she took another sip of wine, hoping to warm her blood.

“First of all, it’s moving along very nicely,” she began with a

smile. “I like the characters very much, especially Paul. I feel like I

know him.”

Alex nodded. “Good. That’s how I want you to feel.”

“And Kristen. She seems very familiar.”

“Does she?”

Rita sipped from her wineglass and studied its contents. “Mm

hmm. Is she based on somebody we know?”

The question was posed in a perfectly innocent tone of voice,

but Alex knew Rita and she also knew the question was a loaded

one. Alex shrugged. “Could be. Sometimes, I’m not even aware of

it.”

Rita nodded, looking her square in the eye. Alex, of course,

looked away, not good with direct eye contact when she was lying

through her teeth. Rita seemed to be searching for the right words.

134 Georgia Beers

“We’re worried about you, Alex.”

Alex’s eyes snapped back to Rita’s. We? “What do you mean?”

“You’re the one who always told me that a writer writes from

his or her own experiences, whether it’s intentional or not.”

Alex searched the inside of her cheek with her tongue, very

leery of the direction her friend was headed. She opted for another

sip of wine rather than a verbal response.

“I saw some glaring similarities between your book and your

life. They concerned me, so I showed Jackie what I meant.”

Alex couldn’t decide how she felt about her sharing this sort of

thing with her best friend, though Rita certainly reserved the right

to do so. Her heart pounded, but she tried to remain calm and inno-

cent. She was terrified that Rita could see right through her. “What

are you talking about?”

“Come on, Alex.” Rita’s voice was soft and gentle. “Your

story’s about a thirty-five-year-old guy who has fallen in love

with—not to mention, become dangerously obsessed with—his mar-

ried next door neighbor…the next door neighbor who’s small and

blonde and has just moved in. What do you think I’m talking

about?”

Jackie entered the room slowly and it was clear she’d been lis-

tening. Alex figured the two of them had probably rehearsed the

whole conversation. “What’s the deal with you and Jennifer?”

“Me and Jennifer? What are you talking about? There’s nothing

going on.” She tried to sound innocent, but wasn’t sure if she was

pulling it off.

“I’m just worried about you, Stretch. I don’t want to see you

get messed up in this. She’s straight and she’s married.”

Alex thought about slyly commenting that Jackie was one for

two, but she managed to keep that thought to herself. She plastered

on her best reassuring face. “There’s nothing going on. Jennifer and

I are friends. That’s all.” She could feel Jackie’s eyes on her and she

felt like her friend could see right into her brain, knowing exactly

what she was thinking.

“Do you have feelings for her?”

“What?” Alex felt her patience waning.

“I know you, Alex. I know how easily you fall. You’ve spent a

lot of time with her. She’s a married woman—a married, straight

woman—with a rich and successful husband. I just don’t want you

to get stuck in a situation that will prove to be nothing but bad news

and heartache, that’s all.” She smiled to ease the tension of the cir-

cumstances. “It’s my job as your best friend to look out for you.”

Alex smiled back, determined to reassure her friends and not to

let them in on the fact that they were much closer to the truth than

even they suspected. “You know me, Jackie. I’ve probably got a lit-

Thy Neighbor’s Wife 135

tle crush thing going on her. I mean, have you seen her? Can you

blame me?” She hoped her smile was playful enough. “I took the

crush and used it as inspiration for my book. It’ll pass. It always

does.”

Both Jackie and Rita searched her face; it took every ounce of

willpower Alex possessed to keep from shifting under the scrutiny.

She sipped her wine.

“You’re not planning on killing Eric, are you?” Jackie asked

softly.

The question took her completely off guard and she coughed up

the swallow of wine in her mouth. Regaining her composure, she

looked incredulously at her friend. “What?”

“I’m just making sure,” Jackie said, realizing what a silly ques-

tion it had been.

“I told you not to ask her that.” Rita glowered at her partner.

“Jack…” Alex took a moment, wiping her chin and trying not

to burst into laughter. “You guys. Please. I appreciate your concern.

I do. But, no, I am not planning on killing Eric. Is that really what

you thought?”

“Of course not,” Rita said, standing. “The bottom line here is

that we’re just looking out for you. We love you and we don’t want

to see you hurt. Okay?”

“Okay.” Alex finished her wine. The conversation had ended

on an up note, but she had the sneaking suspicion that she hadn’t

covered the truth as well as she’d hoped. As always, she was sure

her best friends could see right through her as though she were

made of glass. If that was the case, they’d surely see the name writ-

ten all over her heart.

* * *

Whenever Jennifer was confused, there was only one person

she could go to. Only one person who could help to put things into

perspective, help her to look at her situation from another angle—

usually an angle she’d never realized existed.

If I’d gone to this person a few years earlier, she thought sadly

as she drove, I might have avoided the situation I’m in now. If she’d

gone to him when Eric had hesitantly proposed and her initial reac-

tion was to say no, maybe her life from that point forward would

have been more fulfilling and less disappointing. Maybe she

wouldn’t be stuck where she was and maybe she’d have no trouble

sorting out the jumble of emotions that filled her heart and her

mind, and represented everything she felt for and about Alex.

The fact that she had to go to a cemetery to see that person

only made her sigh with sadness as she maneuvered the Volvo into

136 Georgia Beers

the familiar parking lot. The day was beautiful, breezy and sunny,

so instead of following the paved and winding road around to her

father’s grave, she opted to simply park in the lot and walk, thinking

the fresh air and exercise might help to clear her head. Stuffing her

keys in the pocket of her shorts, she began the trek.

White Haven was quiet with few visitors, being the middle of a

weekday. Not a person was in sight and Jennifer found the solitude

incredibly peaceful.

She found her father’s marker easily and took a seat in the soft

grass.

“Hi, Daddy. Your daisies are on their last legs. Or should I say

their last stems?” She picked up the drooping flowers from the hole

in the ground and set them aside, wishing she had something with

which to replace them.

She sighed heavily, leaned back on her hands and looked up at

the puffy clouds floating by. “No birdseed today, Dad. This was sort

of an impromptu visit. I need to talk.”

What is it, honey? She could hear his voice as the soft breeze

carried it by. What’s bothering you?

“I’ve got this problem. Actually, it’s not a new problem. It’s an

old problem. It’s something that’s been hanging around for quite a

few years now and I should have dealt with it a long time ago. I’m

afraid I let Mom’s genes take over momentarily and I decided that if

I ignored it, it would just go away. Always works for her, right?”

She chuckled bitterly. “Well, it worked for me, too, for a little

while. But now it’s back.”

She slowly picked at a few blades of grass, playing with them,

until she realized her own stalling technique and rolled her eyes at

herself. I’m killing time so I don’t have to explain things to a dead

guy. Brilliant.

“You’re probably not going to like it,” she went on, “but I don’t

think you’ll be surprised.” She took a deep breath and dove in head-

first.

“Remember Sarah from college? Pretty girl, dark hair, hazel

eyes? You used to sing Sarah Smile to her whenever you saw her

and make her blush. Mom hated her.” She paused, remembering her

mother’s immediate disdain for Sarah and realizing that she must

have pegged Sarah’s sexuality before Jennifer even had. “Well, she

didn’t hate her for no reason. Sarah became my girlfriend. I mean

lover. Like, we had an affair.” She tried to picture her father’s

expression as she stumbled over her words.

“I know I should have told you; I should have come to you, but

I was so scared and I just tried to deal with it on my own first. And

then Sarah left me.” She nearly winced aloud as she recalled the

pain of her first broken heart. “See, I was her first female lover, just

Thy Neighbor’s Wife 137

like she was mine, and she dealt with the possibility of an alterna-

tive lifestyle much better than I did. She embraced it. She wanted to

explore it. I didn’t. I was nothing short of terrified and I wanted to

hide—literally—in a closet. I held her back; I know that now. I was

stifling her. I can’t blame her for leaving, but I was a mess.

“I started to sink into a depression. I didn’t want to go out. I

barely went to class. It was bad, Daddy. Poor Kayla was so worried

about me, she didn’t know what else to do, so she called Mom.” It

had taken Jennifer a long, long time to forgive her oldest friend for

that move, but she had finally understood that Kayla only had Jen-

nifer’s best interests at heart.

“Mom completely freaked out. She said I was just going

through a phase, that it was a college thing and now it was over and

that I’d better get myself together or I would lose Eric for good. She

kept talking about what people would think if they found out, how

embarrassing it would be for her. I know she kept it all from you.

She said you’d be so disappointed in me and I believed her like an

idiot.” She shook her head in disgust with herself and looked up at

the sky again as she remembered the endless browbeating she’d

taken from her mother because of her prejudice.

“Anyway, long story short, I pushed all that into a little, dark

corner, locked the door, and figured I’d never have to deal with it

again.” She snorted. “I should have known better.”

His expression was clear in her mind this time, his green eyes

intently fixed on her, making her feel like the only person in the

world. What happened? he’d ask with concern.

“Alex came along, that’s what happened. God, Daddy, she