Torrian (The Highland Clan Book 2) (9 page)

“Then I’m glad Lily brought this for us to share.”

She leaned back in her chair, keeping a chunk of bread in one hand while she broke pieces off of it to chew on. “What did your sister mean by three days?”

“According to my uncle, the king has decreed that my marriage to Davina Buchan will take place within a moon, and he has decided to visit with the Buchans in less than a sennight to assure himself of his plan.”

Heather’s hand froze. “Why would Lily plan this if you are to marry so soon? I do not understand.”

“Lily planned this because she believes in the two of us, and she probably hopes that if I have feelings for you, I’ll fight harder against the wedding. If something does exist between you and me, she wants us to discover it before the wedding rather than after. I know my sister well. When she makes her mind up about something, there is no changing it. She thinks we belong together, and Lily is verra skilled at getting what she wants.”

“But if you are to marry, what chance do we have? I might feel something for you, but I do not wish to have my feelings hurt again if ‘tis hopeless.” She set her bread back onto the table. Never again would she subject herself to the torture Nellie’s father had put her through.

“Do you wish to tell me about it?”

Heather thought for a long moment, staring at the food in front of them. “Nay, not yet. If there is something between us, then I will tell you all. But this is too new for me to share the worst experience of my life with you.”

Torrian reached for her hand and tugged her onto his lap. “Tell me what brings you here. Why did you go along with Lily’s plan?”

Heather did not know what to say—only one thing came to mind. “I’m here because of you, naught else.”

Torrian brushed the back of his hand across her cheek. “Lily did not trick you into coming, did she?”

The warmth of his hand caused a tingling in her that started in her core and moved deep into her womanly place. She did not know exactly how to explain why she was here, but lately she had begun to wonder what she had been missing in all the time she’d spent alone with Nellie. And after picking up on bits and pieces of different conversations among the maids in the kitchens and in the keep, she wanted to know what was so wonderful about coupling. She had no fond memories of it, and yet one glance from the man in front of her made her wish for things she did not altogether understand.

“Nay, she did not use trickery. Lily was honest and sweet. I’m here because I want to know if there’s more.”

“More?”

“Aye. More. It seems that there could be more, much more, but I am confused.” She stared at him, taking in the strong jaw line, the straight nose, the long, light-colored hair. He hadn’t shaved in a couple of days and had rough stubble along his chin, and on him, she liked it. Then her eyes found his lips, and she could not help but wonder if she could will him to kiss her, to desire her.

His lips found hers and melded to her. With a sigh, she parted her lips, allowing him inside. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned close to him, wanting even more from him. His tongue dueled with hers, teasing her, pushing her for more. He pulled back and kissed her cheek and trailed a line of kisses down to just below her ear, where the heat of his breath caused her to shiver.

“Are you cold, lass?”

“Nay.” She leaned into him, wishing to savor his scent and his warmth, yet somehow it felt wrong. He could be marrying another woman soon. She shoved herself away from his chest. “I’m sorry, I’m not ready for this.” She leaned her head toward the pallet and whispered, “I know this is what they had planned, but I cannot agree to it yet. We do not know each other well enough. Does that upset you?”

Torrian lifted her from his lap and set her away from him. Then he stood up and held his hand out to her. “Nay, naught about you could upset me, lass. Mayhap we could ride to the archery field. I noticed your bow when we first met. We could practice together.”

She stared at his outstretched arm for a moment before she tucked her hand in his and followed him. The man was too wonderful. She swore he understood her feelings better than she did.

Chapter Nine

Torrian helped her onto his horse, then climbed up behind her. “Now I can take you to the popular Ramsay archery field.”

“I only now remembered that I do not have my arrow and quiver,” she said softly, looking back at him with big eyes. “Do you?”

He chuckled. “Do not worry, there are plenty at the field.”

“Why do you call it popular?”

“We created it for our Ramsay Festival. My sire invented the festival years ago as an event we run whenever the Grants come to visit. We usually have an archery contest, a horse riding contest that seems to change every year, and an obstacle course for the bairns to run. ‘Tis great fun. My aunt Gwyneth is one of the best archers in all of the land of the Scots, mayhap all of England, so she took charge of the archery field. We even have cases full of equipment just for the festival, and there are several fields set up with different distances marked off. You’ll see.”

“I’ve watched your aunt in action before. In fact, I must confess I stole behind her a few times when she was hunting and training the lassies so I could learn. If I ever get the courage, I’ll tell her and ask her to teach me more. I was always afraid she would see me.”

“Och, I’m sure she knew you were there. Aunt Gwyneth is aware of everything around her, sometimes at distances way beyond what you would expect. She also believes in women choosing their own destiny, so mayhap she trusted you and allowed you to follow along. I would be willing to wager she did everything at a slower pace to allow you to learn.”

“Hmmm. Now that you mention it, you may be right. She was slower than I was expecting.”

“Trust me, my aunt is aware of everything around her. She knew you were there.”

Torrian loved having Heather cradled in front of him on the saddle. She had soft curves in all the right places, but she was as slender and willowy as a graceful swan, unlike the woman who’d splayed herself on his bed the other night. Even though Heather had a daughter, he sensed an innocence about her. They fit each other in a way he and Davina never could.

“Your festival sounds like such a joyful gathering, but I do not know if I could ever attend.” She peeked over her shoulder at him.

He rubbed his free hand up and down her arm. “Would you like to tell me why you have this fear? You do not need to talk about it, but sometimes it helps.”

“I fear it will not,” she said, looking down.

He kissed her neck. “It would help me understand you better. But I can start. Once I became sickly, I was moved to a cottage away from the village, hidden in a copse of trees. I was cared for by a clan family who had been chosen because they had a son about my age, so at first I did not mind it. But they lost him, and then I was alone. Eventually, my weakness overtook my body and I was confined to bed. I just could not get any strength from my food because it would not settle in my belly. I only saw the close members of my family—my da, my grandmama, my uncles, and my sister. She developed the same sickness, but ‘twas never as bad as mine.

“I became so accustomed to living in the cottage that when I finally healed, I felt lost in the real world. Of course, I had to learn to walk again, but people still stared at me. Everywhere I went, I felt uncomfortable.”

“Torrian, ‘tis hard to believe since you are so tall and strong now. Why did it bother
you
to be around others?” She squeezed his hand, and he ran his thumb across the tender skin of her wrist.

“Because I was used to being alone. I learned to entertain myself, mostly by reading. My da taught me how to read. I often practiced my letters and numbers, always hoping that I would be by my sire’s side one day, helping him with the stores and the crops. I’m comfortable alone. Lily needs to be around people, but I am completely the opposite.”

“My situation was different.”

He caressed her hip, hoping to give her encouragement.

She took a deep breath and continued. “My grandparents took me to the fair once a year. I loved to go. The colorful tents and banners were beautiful, and I loved to watch the jousting. But I was always entranced with the jewelry. One day, I sneaked over to the jewelry tent without telling my grandparents. It began to rain as soon as I got inside the tent. The vendor pushed me back out, sending me home because the winds had come up. I stood in the middle of the field as the trees bent in the wind, loose flags blowing everywhere, the wind howling in my ears. I had no idea which way to go. There were so many banners and branches blowing in the wind that I lost my bearings. Everyone tore through the area, yelling and crying, pushing and shoving, but I could not move.

“I screamed and screamed, the rain pelting my face. I knew not where to go, and no one would help me. It seemed like forever before my grandsire finally wrapped me in his arms and took me back to our tent that we slept in, which was still erect. I still carry that fear of being alone in the middle of a crowd of people.” She leaned her head back on his shoulder. “Seems I go back and forth between fear of crowds, then fear of being alone. Even that has overtaken me at times in our cave.”

“I’ll help you conquer that fear. I promise to stay by your side whenever we go into a crowd together.” He’d been impressed at the fact that she’d raised her daughter in a cave alone, but now to hear of her fears, fears that he was able to identify with, he had even more respect for what she’d been able to do on her own. Could he have done the same?

“I hope I can make you proud, but I’m not sure. It has been a verra long time.”

He pulled the reins of the horse and stopped, turning her toward him. His fingers nudged her chin up so his gaze caught hers. “I understand, but I
will
help you with this fear. I promise.” His lips settled on hers and he groaned. She tasted so sweet, and she clung to him, allowing him to set the pace. His tongue mated with hers briefly before he ended the kiss. The dazed expression on her face made him cup her face and kiss her again. “We’re here. I’ll help you down before we both tumble off together.”

She laughed and he jumped down, then set his hands on her waist and lifted her off the horse. She set her hands on his shoulders, sending a bolt of warmth through him. He stared at her, wondering if she’d felt it too. “Here, follow me. We’ll try the first field, so we can find out what feels best to you.”

Torrian clasped her hand in his and led her across fields to where the wooden chests filled with equipment were kept. While Torrian busied himself with one of the chests, he noticed Heather was staring at the field with something like wonder on her face. Though it was a sporting field, there was woman’s touch in the neatness and the exactness of everything.

“Here, see if this works for you.”

***

Heather took the bow and settled the arrows and quiver where she wanted them. Then she nocked her first arrow and let it loose, missing her target completely. Her shoulders slumped. “Mayhap ‘tis why I have better luck spearing fish than I do hunting for meat.”

Torrian came over and stood directly behind her, close enough that she could feel the warmth of his body. “Take your stance.”

She did what he instructed.

“Nock your arrow but do not shoot it.”

Again, she did as he had asked. This time, he came close enough that their bodies touched.

“Adjust your stance just a bit, line everything up better.” He moved her arm just a touch, then said, “Fire away.”

She loosed the arrow and it swished through the air, and caught the outer edge of the target.

“Better,” he said. “Do you trust me?”

She peered up at his tall frame, his gorgeous lips, and his bronzed skin. “Aye. What am I doing wrong?”

“If you trust me, I’ll help you line up the next one even more. Grab another arrow.”

A bit suspicious, she grabbed another arrow and nodded to him. “I’m ready.”

His body came directly behind her this time, his arms covering her arms, showing her exactly how to draw and nock the arrow, then line up with the target. The only problem was all she could feel was his rock-hard abdomen, the heat and calluses of his hands, and the warmth of his breath.

Everything changed in that instant. She could not deny to herself how much she wanted this man. She let the arrow loose and just missed the center of the target. Her face lit up at how much better she’d done with his help.

“Go ahead, try it on your own.” He placed his hands on his hips and watched her, giving her pointers as she progressed.

As they practiced, Heather could not help but notice that every time she made a good shot, Torrian’s face brightened with satisfaction and delight. And she discovered something else—she wanted to make him proud. Never would she have guessed that a man would take such interest in her and her talents. A feeling was building inside her that she hadn’t experienced in a long time—pride.

“Are you not going to shoot?” she asked.

“I will if you’d like, but I do not wish to get in your way.”

“Nay, please do. I learn from watching others.”

He cast her a sideways glance of doubt, but grabbed a bow and took aim. She stood back and watched him shoot arrow after arrow. He hit the center every time.

She stared at the target in shock, then turned to stare into his blazing green eyes. Both of them stood unmoving for a moment, and then he dropped his bow and remaining arrows into the grass and reached for her. Tossing her own bow down, she tugged him closer as his lips claimed hers. She moaned at his taste and wrapped her arms around his neck, throwing herself into kissing him more than she’d ever done before.

The man tasted delicious. She parted her lips, wishing to taste more of him, and melded her body against his. His hands cupped her cheeks with such tenderness that she wanted to do the same for him, but instead she gripped his hips. She wasn’t ready for all of him yet, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t enjoy some of him, did it?

He caressed her back and ran his hands down her sides, finally moving them to her bottom and tugging her close. He angled his mouth to take the kiss deeper, making her want to drop her clothes to the ground and allow him to taste every inch of her body. She vowed to allow herself the pleasure of enjoying this lad, this man, this warrior she clung to with every fiber in her being, simply because she trusted him, simply because he stirred a fire in her like no other.

Torrian continued to caress and tease her with his tongue, making her moan with the most unwomanly sounds she’d ever heard, but she did not wish to stop. She wanted him to go further, touch her, tempt her more. Though she did not want to risk the act that could get her with child, she wished to experience more of womanhood, more of passion.

Her heart thudded against her chest, even more so when he lowered his head to her chest and released her ribbons to free her breast. He cupped her with such tenderness that she could do naught else but watch in awe as he took her nipple in his mouth and suckled her. She moaned and ran her hands down his arms, then continued to stroke his chest and belly. “More, Torrian, more.”

He obliged and tugged the other side of her gown down, flicking his tongue over her taut peak, then drawing on her nipple until she ran her hands through his hair to get him even closer. His hands skimmed down her thigh, pulling on her skirts until it found its way to her bare skin, tantalizing her. He found the vee of her curls and softly caressed her bud, then slid his finger into her slick passage, moving in and out in a suggestive way, the way she needed.

“Nay,” she panted.

Torrian stopped and gazed into her eyes. “Did I hurt you?” His ragged breathing was no different from hers.

“Nay, I just…I know where this is going. I cannot risk another bairn. I’m sorry.”

Torrian said naught, but he helped her tie the ribbons on her gown.

She peeked at the tense line of his jaw, wondering if it meant he was angry. “Torrian. Forgive me.”

He kissed her soundly and caressed her hair. “You’ve done naught wrong. Forgive me. I have gone too far, especially for a lad betrothed.”

Torrian helped her onto his horse and then mounted behind her. As they headed back to the keep in the lowering sun, all she could think of was what she could be losing. Thinking about what they’d just done, she couldn’t believe she had stopped him and he had done what she’d asked. There had been no judgment or censure on his part, just assistance in righting her clothes. He’d accepted her request and honored it, treating her with the respect she deserved.

This situation was so different from her previous experience. Respect, honor, trust, all terms new to her. Dare she think love? She wanted him desperately, but was there any possibility of a chieftain wedding a lass who lived in a cave? Nay, not when the king wanted him to marry a lass of noble blood.