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Authors: Cathy Woodman

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BOOK: Trust Me, I'm a Vet
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‘I didn’t have a chance to thank you for helping to save the old boy’s life.’ He glances over his shoulder towards Robbie, the German shepherd dog, who lies on a piece of sheepskin, alternately panting and sloshing his nose about in a bowl of water. A couple of Bonios lie untouched beside it. ‘I didn’t think I’d be taking him home again. Actually, you couldn’t have a quick look at him now, could you?’ Clive begins. ‘Drinks on the house?’

Why not? I’ve never consulted in a beer tent before. ‘What’s the problem?’

‘He’s having trouble getting up in the mornings.’ Clive’s smiling, but there’s an edge to his voice. ‘He’s like me – too much beer the night before . . . Seriously though, he’s started knuckling over on his back feet.’

I join Robbie, squatting down beside him. I stroke his head, then run my hands back along his shoulders, rediscovering the scar on his chest.

‘How did he get this?’ I ask, tracing the line of the scar with my fingers.

‘We’re a matching pair.’ Clive lifts the front of his shirt and points to a jagged scar which bisects his paunch from his breastbone and disappears below the waist of his boxers. ‘I was a dog handler in the Met.’ He covers up again. ‘Robbie and I were searching an old factory site for two men after an incident at a petrol station. One turned on me with a knife, slit me down the middle. Robbie went in before he could finish the job off.’ Clive bends down and ruffles Robbie’s coat, his voice cracking with emotion. ‘He saved my life.’

I don’t know what it is about this pair, but at this moment I couldn’t speak if I needed to save mine . . .

‘We went back on duty afterwards, but I couldn’t take it any more. I opted for early retirement, Edie – she’s my wife – resigned from her job, and we came down here. We always wanted to retire to Devon to run a pub. It’s been our dream.’ He smiles ruefully. ‘A dream turned nightmare, as it turns out. It’s cost more than double what we expected to restore the mill to its former glory and it’s bloody hard work.’

‘I think I’ll stick with being a vet.’

‘It’s getting better,’ Clive says. ‘It’s just a matter of pulling the punters in now.’

Tell me about it, I muse, as he goes on in a low voice, ‘I don’t know about you, but I’ve found that it takes a while to get used the pace of life and the people here in Talyton. We only got to run the beer tent this year because it was our pub’s turn. The landlord at the Duck and Dragon, who looks as if he’s been there a hundred years, tried to get the rule overturned at the last town hall meeting, on the basis that Edie and I weren’t born within twenty miles of Talyton.’ He grins. ‘I don’t know what they did – consulted the runes, perhaps – but the ancient tradition decrees that it’s the pub that counts, not the people running it.’

I find myself chuckling at the idea of the runes. I wouldn’t be at all surprised. I like Clive. I guess it’s because he understands what it’s like to be an outsider.

I give Robbie a quick once-over, checking his reflexes and pulling him about. I feel sick to the pit of my stomach. I could suggest X-rays and scans to rule out arthritis and other spinal disorders, but from the evidence in front of me – the muscle wastage and weakness – I’d say the diagnosis is pretty conclusive. I’m 99 per cent certain that Robbie has a degenerative disease which results in a gradual paralysis of the back end. It’s merely a matter of time.

‘Well?’ Clive says.

I shake my head.

‘I know the score, Maz. I’ve seen it before,’ Clive goes on. ‘How long?’

‘I don’t know. I’m sorry.’ I tell him he can pick up some anti-inflammatories from the surgery to see if they help his mobility at all, but I’m not optimistic.

Clive turns away, picks up a cloth and takes a moment to wipe down the bar. His shoulders slump and I notice him glance a moment too long at Robbie before turning back.

‘What are you having?’ he says with a barman’s practised cheeriness.

He serves up a Diet Coke for me and a shandy for Izzy. We take our drinks and sit at a table in the corner of the tent where someone has lifted a flap of canvas to allow in a slight breeze.

‘How did the pet show go?’ Izzy asks.

‘Old Fox-Gifford and I couldn’t agree so Fifi chose the winner in the end. Izzy, what happened to Alex’s father?’

‘You mean the limp? He was gored by the bull up at Barton Farm. It was some years ago. He nearly died. They said he’d never work again, but he’s a stubborn old stick.’ Izzy smiles. ‘Stewart had the bull shot. Lucifer, it was called. The Pitts had to employ the services of the AI man instead. His conception rates were the best in the county – the farmers used to lock up their daughters when he was around.’

‘I thought people like the Fox-Giffords became extinct with the dinosaurs.’

‘What makes you say that?’

‘Alex’s parents said they’d chosen a girl for him, someone they approved of.’ Izzy’s brow furrows and I continue, ‘A girlfriend with lovely soft hands.’

‘Alex is more than capable of choosing his girlfriends himself. He’s always linked with some woman or another. According to the gossip, his latest squeeze is one of our drug reps. Eloise, she’s called. She visited Otter House not so long ago, bringing lunch for us in return for watching some video about the company’s latest product, something new for diarrhoea. It went down well with pizza.’

‘I bet it did . . .’

‘I reckon Sophia was talking about their new groom. The reference to her hands means she’s a good rider, that she doesn’t pull on the horses’ mouths.’ Izzy laughs. ‘I expect Alex has a woman to do for him as well.’

‘To do what?’ My imagination is running away with me.

‘A housekeeper. Someone who cooks, washes and tidies up.’

‘I see . . . What’s all this about the ex-wife and
Hello!
magazine?’

‘It wasn’t
Hello!
magazine. It was one of those celebrity gossip mags that you can pick up for 50p. Astra had a brief but lucrative affair with some toyboy of a professional footballer after she left Alex, much to the Fox-Giffords’ chagrin. She did a photo shoot with him, modelling some designer dresses which were more WAG than Sloane Ranger, if you want my opinion. She also made out that the Fox-Giffords were snobbish, intolerant, old-money types’ – Izzy grins – ‘which isn’t all that far wrong, but it was a bit tactless of her to allow it to go into print when she wanted a decent settlement on her divorce.’ She leans back on her chair. ‘Oh, here come the boys.’

Nigel and Stewart join us.

‘It’s Maz, isn’t it?’ Stewart greets me. ‘Friend of Emma’s?’

‘I’m doing her a favour, looking after Otter House while she’s away.’

‘I’d heard a rumour, but I didn’t realise it was you. Long time no see. How are you?’ He looks past me. ‘Hey, Alex, come over and meet the new vet.’

Alex strolls across. One eyebrow flickers up, just briefly but long enough for me to realise that he’s clocked the state of my shoes.

‘I’ve already had the pleasure,’ he says – rather grimly, I think. His top buttons are undone, revealing a V of lightly tanned skin, and – I can’t stop my gaze following straight down to where his shirt is tucked into the waistband of a pair of cream jodhpurs which are ridiculously snug. You’d have thought he could afford to buy a pair that fit.

‘I’m looking for my father,’ Alex adds. He seems a bit tense.

‘I thought that would be the last thing you’d want to do,’ Stewart teases.

‘He has my kids with him, and Mother wants to get them back to the Manor in time for tea.’

‘He’s probably still in the hospitality tent.’ Stewart turns back to me. ‘Let’s hope Maz knows more about dogs than she does about cattle. I’ll always remember the first day you turned up on the farm.’

Not in front of Alex, I think, cringing, as Stewart blabs on, ‘You didn’t know the difference between bullocks and steers.’

‘What is the difference?’ Clive stacks our empty glasses on a tray.

‘Bullocks have bollocks,’ says Stewart. ‘Steers don’t.’

‘I wish I hadn’t asked,’ Clive says, wincing.

‘And then’ – Stewart laughs and slaps his thigh – ‘when I was teaching you to drive the tractor, you reversed the ruddy trailer into the barn and brought half the wall down.’

‘That was a very long time ago,’ I say hotly, ‘and the wall was falling down anyway.’

‘I can’t imagine you as a driving instructor, Stewart. I seem to recall you rolling your parents’ car off the end of Elm Hill once.’ Alex steps up beside me. (Emma’s taken me to Elm Hill before – it’s on the north edge of the escarpment on the way to Talymouth.) ‘Stewart forgot to put the handbrake on when he was, let us say, entertaining one of his young ladies.’

Alex’s comment on Stewart’s past indiscretions reminds me why I’m so off men, although Stewart does have the grace to blush. He drains his pint and changes the subject.

‘It’s a pity you had that last fence down, Alex,’ Stewart says. ‘I saw your last round.’

‘Yes, that was my own bloody fault, and don’t I know it. I’m never going to hear the end of it from my mother,’ Alex says crossly. ‘That little mare—’

‘You mean the horse, not your mother,’ Stewart cuts in, in a vain attempt to lighten Alex’s mood.

‘She’s a fantastic jumper, the best I’ve ever had,’ Alex goes on, not smiling, ‘and I went and messed it up for her. I could kick myself, missing that stride at the planks.’

‘Well, I’m sure we’ll see you on the British team one day, if your mother has anything to do with it.’ Stewart gives Alex a friendly shove.

‘Pushy mothers – who’d have them?’ Alex grimaces. He doesn’t look anywhere near so good-looking when he does that, and I find myself thinking that my first opinion of him was right. He’s arrogant, self-obsessed and he probably is the womaniser everyone paints him to be. In fact, I’m embarrassed that I asked Izzy about him.

‘I shouldn’t criticise,’ Alex says, his voice softening. ‘If it wasn’t for Mother, I wouldn’t have a horse to ride, and I’d struggle to look after the kids.’

‘Talking of kids,’ Stewart cuts in, ‘I’d better go and find mine.’ He checks his watch. ‘I said I’d meet Lynsey at the bouncy castle at four – she’s going to kill me.’

‘What’s new?’ says Alex. ‘If you see my father, tell him I’m on the warpath.’

‘I’ll see you on the farm on Monday,’ says Stewart. ‘Cheers all. I’m off.’

‘I must go too,’ says Nigel. ‘We’re dancing in the main arena in fifteen minutes. Are you coming along to watch, Izzy?’

‘I can’t, Nigel. I promised Fifi I’d do a stint on the Talyton Animal Rescue stall.’

‘Oh. How about you, Maz?’

‘I really have to get back to the surgery to check on the inpatients,’ I say, not wanting to be left alone with Alex Fox-Gifford. I’m finding it difficult to be civil after the slurry incident, and he seems to be in a foul mood.

‘Have you got many in then,’ Alex asks, as Nigel strolls away, the bells on his socks tinkling, ‘or is it an excuse to get away from here? It’s all right. You don’t have to lie. I loathe these events.’ He pauses. ‘Oh, how was Pippin?’

‘Why did I get the distinct impression you were passing the buck?’

‘All right.’ He taps the end of his whip sharply against his long leather boots. ‘Probably because I was. Sometimes these chronic cases need a fresh approach, and Mr Brown has got this habit of turning a ten-minute appointment into a marathon.’

‘Well, thanks a lot for warning me,’ I say sarcastically.

‘I apologise.’ Alex makes as if to move a step closer, then changes his mind. ‘I must get going . . . I look forward to seeing you again soon, Maz.’

I watch him leave the beer tent, ducking out under the canvas at the entrance into the sunshine. The feeling isn’t necessarily mutual.

Chapter Eight

In the Event of Emergency

When I get back to Otter House after the show, I take Miff out for a walk along the river. I stop on the footbridge and drop sticks into the fast-flowing muddy water, but it isn’t much fun playing Pooh sticks alone, and Miff refuses to get her paws wet. She refuses to retrieve too. When I throw a stick (OK, I know I shouldn’t), Miff picks it up, crunches it and spits out the bits.

‘Miff, that’s rubbish,’ I tell her, and she looks at me, her eyes filled with hurt, as if to say, ‘What do you expect? I’m not a retriever.’

‘I’m sorry.’ Sometimes I expect too much of people – and dogs. More than that, I expect too much of myself. Miff wags her tail as if to say, ‘Apology accepted’, and we stroll on along the right path this time, straying wide of it only where the bank has fallen away into a bend in the river.

There’s no one else down here, yet I feel less alone than I did at the show, where I was the outsider, watching everyone living their lives. I was going to say, ‘their quiet, rather boring country lives’, but I’ve realised that living in the country isn’t quite as dull as I’d imagined.

A pair of swans glide silently down the river. One spreads its wings, then tucks them in again.

Still, country life isn’t for me – I’m quite sure of that. Whatever it is I’m looking for, I’m not going to find it here in Talyton St George.

‘I’ll give you the number for Talyton Manor Vets . . .’ Frances, who’s wearing a dress so brightly patterned it could be on some sort of hallucinogenic drug, opens a new screen on the monitor at Reception on Monday morning. ‘The Fox-Giffords know everything there is to know about every kind of animal.’

BOOK: Trust Me, I'm a Vet
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