Trust Me When the Sun Goes Down (26 page)

I don’t remember getting off the boat.

I didn’t say a single thing to anyone about what’d happened, but they all knew, of course.  The walls were thin. 

The next thing I knew, I stood in a tiny waiting room while Hanna used her Spanish to try and get us a rental car.  The bleary-eyed Mexican was trying to explain that he didn’t have anything available, the two cars left in the lot were already reserved by other customers. 

My Spanish skills were basic at best, but I did know this one.  “
Dame un coche
,” I said, catching hold of him with my will and his face went slack.

“
Un coche
,” he repeated, handing me the nearest set of keys. 

“
Gracias
.”  I didn’t care whose travel plans I was messing up, I had to get out of there and fast.  Maggie stood out in the parking lot waiting for us, her hazel eyes looming large in her face as she watched me like I might fly apart at any second.  She wasn’t wrong. 

I tried the key on both cars, ending up with a dark blue sedan.  “Get in,” I said, opening the driver’s door, but Hanna stopped me, insinuating herself between the door and the seat. 

“You shouldn’t be driving.”

“Fine.”  I tossed her the keys, going around to the passenger’s side instead.  Halfway in, I noticed Maggie hadn’t made a move to join us.  She just stood in the parking lot, wringing her hands.  “You’re not coming with?” I asked, stepping back out again.

“I think I should stay behind and make sure the others get home.”

“They’re adults, I’m sure they can figure it out.”

“Yes,” she allowed, hesitating.  “But the boat is scheduled to return to Puerto Vallarta.  I should at least see it safely there.”

“Fine.”  I couldn’t care less about the boat.  I was pretty sure the captain could manage it on his own, but if she wanted to stay and babysit Bridget and Rob, I wasn’t about to argue.  “I’ll see you later at home.”

“You’re not staying on in Puerto Vallarta?”  Her lips parted in surprise.

“No, the romantic suite you booked doesn’t sound all that great right now, go figure,” I retorted, hating the way her shoulders bowed at my waspish tone.  “Look, I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t be allowed to talk to people right now,” I added quickly.  I had no right to take anything out on her.  “It’s fine if you want to stay and take care of them.  We’ll figure out our own way home.” 

“If you can stay on for a day or so, I can make the arrangements.”

“No, I need to be – not here.”

“Anja, I’m so sorry.  I’m sure it’s…”

I held up my hand, tears threatening in the face of her pity.  “I’ll see you at home.”  I didn’t see Rob or Bridget and that was definitely for the best. 

Hanna drove in silence, which I appreciated for the first half hour while my head cleared.  The more distance we put between us and the boat, the easier it was to think.  Unfortunately, that also made it easier to remember, and I fiddled with the radio, desperate for something to take my mind off of the night’s events. 

“Do you know where you’re going?” I asked when I couldn’t find anything soothing. 

“More or less,” she shrugged.  “We stick to the highway until we hit Puerto Vallarta.  Then it’s pretty much follow the signs to the airport.  We should be able to find a hotel nearby to crash at.”

She was right, I’d need a place to hole up in for the daytime before we could fly home.  I knew it was a lot later than she was used to staying up, especially without a mocha and no Starbucks in sight.  “Do you want me to drive for a while?  I’m better now, I swear.”

“No, I’m good.”

The silence bothered me all of a sudden, and I felt the need to fill the space.  “Do you want to play a game?  How about
I see something
?” 

“I thought you didn’t want to talk to people?” she frowned.

“You’re not people, you’re my sister.  If I can’t talk to you, who can I talk to?  Just, you know, don’t try and cheer me up.  I don’t want to cheer up, all I want to do is stop feeling everything for a while, at least until we get somewhere I can have a good ugly cry.” 

“Hey, I’m not the Pollyanna in the family, that’s you.  People suck.  This just proves it.”

“Ordinarily I’d argue with that, but…” I relapsed as my murky thoughts surfaced again.  It didn’t last long though.  For every lousy, rotten person that came to mind, there were just as many great ones, even my bruised and battered heart knew that.  “I don’t know.  There are good people out there, I just… I really thought Rob was one of them.”

“That’s what you get for falling in love with a vampire.  They can’t be trusted.”

I stared at her, slack jawed.  Not even getting into the fact that
I
was a vampire, she’d fallen in love with one herself.  “How can you say that?  What did Mason ever do to you?” 

“You mean besides lie to me about what he is and compel me into doing God knows what?”

“I’ve already told you he kept it a secret from you for so long because I ordered him to.  All he did was love you and you tortured him.”

“Don’t you think I know that?”  Her voice rose into a hysterical wail as tears started streaming down her cheeks.  The sight of her tears opened up the floodgates, and my thin veneer of control eroded as I erupted into sobs beside her.  She pulled to the side of the road, and we wept together, clinging to each other in a desperate hug. 

It felt good to let it out, the outpouring of sorrow less frightening and more therapeutic than the rage I’d been trying to keep a tight hold over.  From the way Hanna’s shoulders shook, I got the idea this might be the first time she’d let herself have a good cry over what’d happened to her since that night in front of the bonfire months ago. 

We huddled, sniffling in the dark, not caring how much of a mess we were until the storm of emotion subsided.  “I can’t believe it’s really over,” I mumbled, the pain of Rob’s betrayal more of an ache than a throb now.  “I thought we’d be together forever.”

“It’s better you find out what kind of a man he really is now,” Hanna sniffed, wiping her nose on her sleeve.  “At least you have the luxury of knowing it’s nothing you did.  I screwed things up so bad with Mason.  I don’t think I can ever make things right.”

“You don’t have to, he knows it wasn’t your fault.  Lodinn compelled you to treat him that way.”

“It’s not only that.  It is my fault I’ve left him out in the cold for so long.  I just couldn’t…”  She shook her head.  “All I wanted to do was forget.  Only I couldn’t forget.  It didn’t matter if Mason was around or not, every time I looked in the mirror I’d get a flash of something I’d said or did.  God, I can’t believe I let it take over my whole life.  Mason, my job…  You remember what I said about having money saved up?  That was bullshit.  I withdrew my last five hundred dollars to come on this trip.”

“Oh, Hanna, why didn’t you tell me?  Please let me help you out.  What’s the point in my having money if I can’t give it to the people I love?”  There had to be a way to give her a chunk of money and save her pride at the same time.  I resolved to talk to Maggie about it later. 

She smiled, swiping at her cheeks.  “It’s okay.  I won enough at craps to float for a few months, so in a way, you already have helped me.”

“That’s not enough though.  Hanna, I’m so sorry your life is so screwed up, it’s all my fault.  Without me, you never would’ve gotten mixed up in any of this.” 

“No, it’s not.  I think we both have to learn to stop playing the blame game.  Sometimes things are just fucked up, and there’s nothing we can do about it.  It’s not your fault and it’s not mine and it’s not Mason’s.  We just have to learn to move on.”

“Why not give him a call then?”

“I don’t know.  That’s not the kind of moving on I meant.”

“Hanna, he still loves you, I guarantee it.  I hear it in his voice every single time I talk to him.  He never stops asking about you.”

“He does?”

I smiled at the tinge of hope I saw there.  “I may be lousy at seeing what’s going on in my own relationship, but I can tell you both still have serious feelings for each other.”

Her brows rose in skepticism.  “That’s not the best recommendation for your judgment.”

“I know,” I admitted with a laugh, and somehow I felt better.  If I could still laugh, I’d survive this. 

* * *

When we got to the hotel in Puerto Vallarta, I realized I didn’t have my purse, my passport, my luggage, nothing.  Hanna had her purse with her and checked us into a double room and we both collapsed in the darkened room, thoroughly worn out.  There were arrangements to be made, but I was so tired (and lazy – I admit, I’d gotten used to Maggie taking care of such things), all I wanted to do was sleep.

But the last thing I wanted was to accidentally run into Rob or Bridget the next night, assuming they were trying to get home too.  The quicker we got out of town, the better.  Though I didn’t even want to think about what I’d do when Rob made it home as well.  The thought of watching him pack up his things and go made me want to cry again.

I thought about calling Bishop, he had offered me the use of the Order’s resources before, but I decided it wasn’t fair to him to lean on him for something like this.  I didn’t want to call Jenessa either.  I had this vision of a speculative gleam coming into her eyes the moment she found out Rob was single again.  Maybe that was an unfair judgment on my part, but my benefit of the doubt was on the fritz. 

I’d picked up my phone to call Leander to sound him out for help when Hanna plucked it out of my hand and set it on her side of the bedside table. 

“Why don’t you get some rest and let your big sister take care of this one?  I need a cat nap and then I’ll book us a flight home, okay?”

“Are you sure?  I can get Leander to wire us some money for the trip home, no problem.”

“Nah, I’m flush with cash, remember?  You can pay me back later.  Now stop with the phone and get some sleep.”

By the time I woke the next night, she’d booked us a flight to San Jose and thanks to my powers of compulsion, I totally got to pull the
you don’t need to see my identification
Jedi mind trick.  I had plenty of time to think on the flight, part of me dreading walking into the house by myself.  Maybe I’d stay in San Jose with Hanna for a few days?  But as we disembarked at the airport, I saw a familiar figure waiting for us in the arrivals lounge. 

“You called Mason?”  I stopped short in surprise, almost getting plowed over by a sweaty man wearing too much denim. 

Hanna’s eyes rested on his hopeful smile.  “Yep, I figured we’d need a ride.”

The pretext was ridiculous, of course.  There was no reason he’d need to drive all that way when we could take a shuttle service to her place, but I was willing to go with it if it brought them together again.

“Hello, ladies.”  His smile stretched wider as we approached.  “Somebody call for a taxi?”

A challenging lilt that I hadn’t heard in a while came into Hanna’s voice.  “That all depends.  What will it cost me?”

“A cup of coffee?”

“I think that sounds fair,” she smiled, and that’s when I realized, I’d better find my own way home.  They needed this time alone together far more than I needed a place to crash to avoid running into Rob. 

“You two go ahead, I can make it back to San Francisco on my own.”

“Are you sure?”  Mason’s brows drew together with concern.  “I don’t mind driving.  I’ve got a full tank of gas and a Wham CD in the car stereo.”

“No, I think I’d rather be on my own for now.  I’ll be fine.  Thanks though, I appreciate you coming down here.”

Mason wrapped me up in a big bear hug.  “You let me know if you want me to crack some skulls,” he said in a low voice.  “I got your back, sis.”

I was too numb to care that Hanna had obviously told him the circumstances of our early arrival.  The news of my break-up with Rob would be out sooner or later, though hopefully we could keep the more lurid details quiet.  “I already cracked a few of his ribs, I think I’m good on revenge for now, but I’ll keep you in mind.”

Hanna and I exchanged a brief hug as well.  “Give me a call when you’re ready to watch
Steel Magnolias
,” she said. 

“Absolutely I will,” I smiled, blinking past the threat of tears.  “Good luck,” I whispered for her ears only.

“Are you ready, kitten?” Mason asked when we pulled apart. 

“You know
Careless Whispers
is my jam,” she replied, her smile overly bright.  I could tell she was super nervous, but it was a start. 

* * *

It was less than an hour before dawn by the time I made it home.  The house was blessedly empty, Lee and Gunnar still off doing God knew what since I wasn’t scheduled to return for several more days.  As much as I loved those guys, I was glad to have the place to myself.  I don’t think I could’ve survived any sage advice without another burst of waterworks. 

I knew I had to go to bed soon, but I was reluctant to go down to the bedroom we shared.  Maybe I’d crash in one of the spare rooms for the day?  Either way I headed for the front parlor instead of my room to snap on the comforting sound of the TV.  The news I found there was just as depressing as the scent of Rob’s aftershave on my pillow.  The early morning newscasters were discussing the facts of another grisly murder.  A girl found two nights ago, not two blocks from Dead Lazlo’s.  It didn’t take long to figure out it was likely vampire related, and I went to my office to check and see if Leander had mentioned anything about it in his latest report.