Unbearable Desire (Paranormal Bear Shifter Romance) (Bear Valley Clan Book 1)

UnBEARable

Desire

by

Serena Nox

Copyright 2015

All Rights Reserved

This book is a work of fiction.  Any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

This book contains adult themes, explicit language and sexual situations.  It is intended for mature audiences.

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Prologue

Autumn

The rest of the bears were down in the valley, gorging on trout before their long hibernation. Kai watched over his clan from the western slope of the mountain, his senses on high alert. It hadn't rained in almost a moon. The pickings were slim and every bear clan in the valley would be competing for enough food to survive the winter. He needed to stay vigilant for his clan.

A rush of wings overhead was his first sign that something was amiss. The flock of swallows formed a panicked ball that twisted and turned as one as the birds fled the unseen danger. Kai lifted himself up onto his hind legs and sniffed the crisp mountain air.

The scent that came down from the mountain was wrong.  The chemical burn singed his nostrils and set his bear growling low in his throat.

"Remain with the clan, I will return," he thought to his beta.  Faron lifted his head and then bowed it in response, acknowledging a direct order from his alpha. Kai dropped down to all fours and loped into the woods.

This side of the river was not his territory. He was trespassing, a transgression that could cost him his life if caught. But the danger posed to his small clan was more important that any taboos. Kai lifted his shaggy head and caught the chemical tang in the air, and raced toward it. 

As he neared the source of the smell, he heard human voices, shouting and panicked.  Kai slowed up and halted, confused. A ramshackle structure had been hastily assembled from weathered boards and scraps of aluminum. It looked like a crude dwelling place for humans, but humans never ventured this far into the wilderness. And if they did, they were scared off by the clan that controlled this territory.

Kai padded closer, growling continuously now. The forest floor was littered with trash; bottles and tanks broken and oozing harsh liquids.

A strange man leaned against a tree, a long stick cradled in his arms.  He picked his nails indolently, seemingly unaware of the threat that hung in the air. Kai growled low. 

The man stood up straight, swinging the stick up to his shoulders. "Who the fuck is out there?" he yelled, fear strangling his voice.

Kai roared in defiance, pulling himself up onto his hind legs to let the man see his full strength. 

There was a deafening noise and a feeling like fire shot across Kai's shoulder. "Get the fuck outta here, bear, these are our woods!"

Kai roared, dropping back down to four legs.  The pain in his shoulder was fierce.  He roared again, ready to maul the intruder.

But just as he readied his charge, there came a panicked shout. He and the intruder both turned to see a dirty, panicked man ran headlong out of the shelter, tearing at his clothes. "Mitchell!" he cried at the man at the tree. "Get the fuck outta there, she's gonna blow!"

Another man came screaming out of the ramshackle shelter. "Dwayne it off, get it the fuck off!" he keened in a high, inhuman scream, twisting and thrashing so violently that he collapsed on the ground.

The other man swore and ran to the fallen man, dragging him away from the shelter.  Kai backed away watching as the Dwayne stripped the man naked. His tortured cries turned into gurgling gasps. Bright red welts begun appearing all over the fallen man's body and the harsh tang in the air hung heavy and poisonously low to the ground.

"What the fuck?" Mitchell stalked forward, no longer caring about the bear.

"I dunno, fuck, Boyd, stay alive you stupid fuck." He shook the dying man, but the gurgles were weakening.

The two men stared back that the shelter. Mitchell gulped, "You think it's okay to...?"

There was a bright, blinding flash, and then a shockwave sent Kai tumbling. He landed hard and gasping in the poisonous air, and his animal took over. Turning tail, he took one look backward at the rising fireball, then tore back down through the trees. 

The dry forest was burning. All around him he could hear the panicked cries of the animals who could flee the blaze and the horrifying screams of those who couldn't. A spark rushed ahead on the wind and settled on his fur, setting it alight. Kai tucked his front legs under and rolled in a somersault, extinguishing the flames mid-stride.

Faron was standing at the edge of the clearing. As soon as he saw Kai, he loped up to his alpha.

"Humans," Kai panted. "Human's set fire to the forest."

Faron was aghast. "The Falls Creek Clan allowed humans to damage their territory?"

"I do not know. We must move upstream. Get the others."

"I will do this." Faron was already streaking across the riverbank, as fast as his four legs could carry him. One by one the black heads popped up from the river.

Kai stood on the far bank, watching and counting. When he was certain that his whole clan had moved to safety, he set off himself.  A hot wind blasted him in the back as he splashed across the wide river and up the sloped banks to his own territory.

Humans in the forest,
he thought, letting the rest of the clan hear him.
There were humans in the forest and they were living there without being supervised. We must alert the Falls Creek Clan and remain vigilant through the winter's hibernation.
Kai winced as the flames roared hotter.
Humans cannot be trusted.

Spring

The cabin squatted there in the clearing, nestled into the harsh landscape like it belonged there. The snow had melted back enough to reveal the patches of bare, muddy ground, but the earth was still hard and unyielding under my feet. I zipped up my snow jacket and shrugged my hands into my pockets, then set out across the field to my home for the next six months.

Gabby had heard me pull up.  My sister was standing in the doorway our grandparents' cabin, her nervous hands tapping excitedly against the frame.  She looked worn and frazzled, but still full of nervous anxiety.  Her dark blonde hair was caught back in a hasty braid, but a halo of frizz stood out from her scalp. There were purple shadows underneath her darting green eyes and her pretty lips had a downward tilt I had never seen before.

She was clad in a heavy wool sweater I recognized as my Gran's. And a pair of wool trousers that most certainly were Pa's.

"Ellie," she exhaled as she saw me.

"Hey Gabs." I stepped up on to the porch and straight into my older sister's arms. She held me tightly, not saying anything, but I could feel her shoulders shaking as she stifled her sobs.

"I'm here now, Gabby. You can take a break."

"I'm okay," she lied, pulling back and wiping her eyes.

"How is she?" I asked, peering round the door and into the dark interior of the cabin.

Gabby lowered her voice. "I'm never sure how much she understands, so I'm going to be quiet. But she's close, Ellie. She's probably not going to last your full six months."

I sucked in my breath as she led me over the threshold. The scent of ill health hung heavy in my nostrils, unable to be dispelled by the chill mountain air.  My stomach roiled. I had never smelled death before, but now that I did, my first animal instinct was to run away from the danger.  But I loved my sister and I loved my Gran, so I forced myself to step into the cabin.

The first thing I saw were the medications lined up on the windowsill. The window over the kitchen sink had a deep sill, and the pill bottles were stacked so high they nearly blocked the view outside.  The light coming through took on the amber hue of the bottles themselves, distorting the rest of the dark kitchen.

I had a weird feeling of everything sliding sideways as I looked around the rest of the kitchen. Everything was the same as it had been when I was a child, but everything in my life was different. There was no tinkling laugh from my grandmother, no clucking concern from my mother, no gruff affection from my grandfather. My sister and I were grown and grief-worn; two completely different girls from the ones who had run about this cabin laughing and teasing. But the place itself remained the same.

I saw the old, cranky stovetop; the box of matches for lighting the gas in its usual place. I saw the pile of battered recipe books dusty with disuse. I saw the old red-plaid curtains, hand-sewn by my Gran when she was my Pa's happy and eager bride.I stood in the kitchen, soaked in memories, staring intently at that dusty window. I was deliberately not looking into the living room. Not until I heard a low, guttural noise that sounded almost inhuman.

"Yeah, she's here, Gran," Gabby called into the dark room.  "Ellie came to see you."

I rolled my shoulders back and nodded at my sister, who led me into the living room. In my childhood this had been my favorite place.  The outside wall was dominated by a deep, long fireplace the crackled merrily all winter long. But the fire was out now, and the room was chilled.  My grandfather had hung pelts on the walls to help with the cold, but those pelts were now taken down and piled into the easy chair for some reason.

It took me a moment to realize they were covering my Gran.

I tried to catch the gasp before it left my lips, but it tore free from my throat of its own accord. My grandmother, my beautiful, sweet, Gran, had shriveled down into a crude imitation of her former self. She resembled nothing so much as a newborn bird, wrinkled and helpless, her mouth opening and closing soundlessly. Her body was so shriveled that the blankets barely rose around her.

I went to her and knelt by her side. 'Hey there Granny Bea." My voice got strangled in my throat and came out in only a whisper.  But she still turned her head towards my voice.

"You're little Ellie," she declared, lifting her hand.  I put my head underneath it and she patted my hair gently, just like she had when I was a child.

Gabby was watching from over by the window, her face a strange mix of sadness and hurt. "She always did like you best," Gabby declared. "Sometimes whole days would go by without her having the faintest notion of who I was, but she recognized you right away.

My grandmother's tentative pats slowed and I heard the sound of faint snoring. Pulling myself up to a stand, I watched her head loll to the side as she drifted off to sleep. "I'm here now Gabby," I said in response to her unspoken accusation. "I'll take care of her. You deserve a break."

She heaved a huge sigh and rolled her temples in her fists, then let out a short, barking laugh. "You know what's funny? I've been counting the days til you got here and sprung me from this prison, but now that you're here, I can't bring myself to leave. What if she goes and I'm not here to hold her hand?"

I cupped Gabby's exhausted face in my hand. "Then you can know that you did right by her for six whole months.  Go have a life now, Gabby. I'm here, it's my turn to take care of her now."

Gabby looked at me, exhaustion written on every new line on her face.  My sister was only three years older than me, but her time up here had aged her.  She fell forward into my arms and I struggled to hold her upright as her shoulders shook. Her mute sobbing sounded more like relief than sadness.

It had been her idea to trade off the years like this, and it had been her idea to take the first half. Our mother's death had sent her reeling, and in her sorrow and grief she had shut down, ultimately losing both her job and her boyfriend in the ensuing depression. She had craved the isolation of the cabin and I had been eager to do whatever it took to make her happy, agreeing with her as she outlined our lives for the next year.  I would stay down in the valley and wind down our mother's affairs while she holed herself up with our grandmother.  Then after six months, I would relieve her and she would venture back into the world again

I patted her thick braid and stroked her hair behind her ears as her sobs slowed.  She pulled back from my shoulder, gulping deep, hiccuping breaths, pulling herself together just as quickly as she had fallen apart.  I felt a rush of affection and admiration for my sister. "And for god's sake go get a mani-pedi or something." I smiled at her. "You've gone completely feral up here."

The idea made Gabby laugh through her tears. Girly was never a word to describe my big sister. She was practical and responsible in all things, and that included forgoing such little luxuries. She was the type to rinse and reuse plastic sandwich bags and fill gallon jugs to put in her toilet tank.

I was nowhere near as resourceful and the thought weighed on me heavily as I helped her pack her pickup. Gran was sleeping soundly now, but what happened when Gabby pulled out of the field and started down that dirt road? I would be alone in the house with the shell of my grandmother, lonely and isolated, as winter still clung to the edges of the season. A lump of dread formed in my throat even as I told Gabby to go and promised her I would be fine.  I even stood in the middle of the field and smiled brightly as I waved to her retreating pickup.

The wind whistling down off the peak sounded like the moaning of some damned spirit. I shivered in spite of my snow jacket, not from the cold.

This place didn't seem so familiar any more.