Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Golden Plunger Awards (22 page)

BOOK: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Golden Plunger Awards
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Over the following years, cupholders took on different forms—even standalone devices that clipped onto the window. Those weren’t terribly popular with consumers, though, because they left the drink to be jiggled when the door was opened. During the Space Race of the 1960s, some cupholders even came in the shape of
Mercury
capsules, although those didn’t keep the drinks particularly steady either.
By the 1980s, cupholders were standard inside nearly all American cars—sometimes as a pop-out plastic contraption in the console near the radio and sometimes in the doors. European and Asian car manufacturers didn’t catch on until the 1990s. Today, many carmakers don’t just offer a couple of cupholders in each car—multiple cupholders have become a great selling feature, and in a large SUV, you might find more than a dozen.
CUPS THAT DON’T RUNNETH OVER
For the carmakers, keeping up with lifestyle changes can be tricky. Here are some of the things, they have to consider:
• Cupholders have had to adapt as average American beverage sizes have gotten larger. Now, they have to fit 12-, 32-, and 64-ounce drinks—and even larger. It’s much harder than it seems, because larger drinks have a different center of gravity than smaller ones. So one drink might be fine while turning a corner, but a larger one in the same cupholder might spill.
• Different sizes have to be comfortably accommodated in convenient places, too. If a cupholder doesn’t hold its drink securely, it can rattle while the car is moving, and prospective buyers don’t like that at all. (Carmakers know that little things like this turn consumers off and make them less likely to buy the same model in the future.) It gets even worse if a retracting cupholder breaks inside its compartment and causes a constant rattle. Cupholders have to be sturdy and withstand years of wear and tear.
• People don’t just drink soda and coffee in their cars, so the cupholders have to be able to accommodate an aluminum can, a coffee cup, a plastic cup, a juice box, a water bottle, and more.
CUPHOLDER TRIVIA
• In 1998, 7-11 redesigned the Big Gulp cup so that it would fit in standard cupholders.
• Cars in the United States (even foreign makes designed to be sold in the United States rather than overseas) have larger cupholders than in the rest of the world.
• Companies have started to design consumable products other than drinks to fit into car cupholders—like fruit cups, salads, and soup.
THE “NICE TEAMWORK, GUYS” AWARD
The International Space Station
The International Space Station symbolizes a lot more than the
end of the Cold War. It stands out as an international
effort to propel humanity into the 21st century.
 
AND . . . THEY’RE OFF!
In 1961, President John F. Kennedy announced that the United States would put a man on the moon by the end of the decade. Amid a staggering arms race between the U.S. and the U.S.S.R., as well as threats of aggression and war, the space race became the symbol of economic and scientific superiority. The race to the moon was as much about bragging rights for who got there first as it was about scientific discovery.
Perhaps nothing symbolizes the end of the Cold War as much as the construction of the International Space Station (ISS). It wasn’t that long ago when several of the countries involved wanted to destroy, or at least outdo, each other. Instead, now they’re working together to build a home in the vast ether surrounding the globe.
It all began when America’s team lost funding for its own space station and had to turn to a former enemy for help.
LIFTOFF
While America began its race to the moon with the
Gemini
and
Apollo
programs, the Soviets turned their attention toward building a satellite, one that could sustain a crew for an extended period of time. They built the first space station, the
Salyut
1
, in 1971—two years after American Neil Armstrong walked on the moon.
America followed suit in 1973 with
Skylab
. Not to be outdone, the Soviet Union continued to launch space stations, including a military space station, throughout the 1970s. Space stations did-n’t have a very long life span, and technical problems plagued the entire program. But the Soviet’s persistence paid off in 1986, when they launched the first piece of the space station
Mir
.
Mir
was operable as a space station immediately, but it wasn’t officially completed until 1997, when it reached its full weight of 137 tons. For 10 years, from 1989 until 1999,
Mir
was occupied by humans—and in a precursor to the peaceful cooperation of the International Space Station,
Mir
entertained both Soviet and American guests, as well as astronauts from 10 other countries. All told, 23,000 experiments were performed there in the name of science.
WHAT IT TOOK
Mir
laid the foundation, but the origin of the International Space Station begins in 1984, when President Ronald Reagan announced plans for the American space station
Freedom
. But building
Freedom
would be costly, and by 1993, the project was stalling amid lack of funding and support.
Under President Bill Clinton, the plan for
Freedom
changed, and the former Soviet Union (now Russia) came in as a partner—along with Japan, Canada, and several European countries (under the European Space Agency). The project got a new name: the International Space Station. Russia had been planning its own new space station (
Mir-2
) and folded plans for that into the international effort. The space station would have to be built in sections, because it was so big, and the Russians launched the first component into orbit in 1998.
Today, 17 countries are part of the effort to build the ISS. When it’s finished (NASA hopes for 2010), the space station will be 356 feet long and 100 feet high, and will weigh more than 900,000 pounds—or at least it would weigh that much on Earth. And when it’s completed, the space station will have the largest laboratory ever built in space, with six separate and fully functional research stations.
CALL THE LANDLORD FOR REPAIRS
Who owns the space station, however, is a bit tricky. Complex agreements have been drawn up between all the participating countries that include basic laws and codes of conduct for astronauts onboard, as well as strict guidelines for who can use which lab and when. Teamwork only goes so far, and all the participants want to protect their own little piece of the investment.
NASA’s estimated costs alone are in the neighborhood of $30 billion for the entire project (from 1994 to completion). Although the space station is the most expensive thing ever built, its success will be short-lived; it will shine in the sky only from 2010 to 2016 because space stations (like all satellites) still degrade over time and aren’t known for their longevity.
WEIRD GRAMMY MOMENTS
• At the 1998 awards, Bob Dylan performed his song “Love Sick” while surrounded by young fans in a mock coffeehouse setting. Somehow, a performance artist named Michael Portnoy leapt onto the stage and danced wildly with the words “Soy Bomb” written on his bare chest. Security removed him, and Dylan didn’t miss a note. (We still don’t know what “Soy Bomb” means.)
• Also in 1998, at the end of the show, as Shawn Colvin took the stage to accept the award for Record of the Year for “Sunny Came Home,” Wu-Tang Clan rapper Ol’ Dirty Bastard got to the microphone first and went on a strange rant about how it was disgraceful that the Wu-Tang Clan lost the Best Rap Album grammy to Puff Daddy because “Wu-Tang is for the children!”
• In 1988, Metallica performed the hit song “One” and waited in the wings of the stage. The next award to be presented was the Best Hard Rock/Heavy Metal Grammy, for which they were considered a lock. The winner was announced and it was . . . 1970s progressive rock band Jethro Tull, who was so far removed from heavy metal that its lead singer played a flute. • In 2001, country rock singer Shelby Lynne won the award for Best New Artist. It was a strange honor for Lynne. She’d recorded her first album in 1988 and had released six albums since.
THE SCI-FI IN 2-D AWARD
Michael Whelan
By definition, every painter is a visionary—but only a select
few can envision worlds that have never been seen by
human eyes. Here’s the best in the business.
THE GO-TO GUY
Even if you’re not into fantasy or science fiction, chances are you’ve seen at least a few of this heavily influential artist’s images—especially if you browse bookstores. Over the last 30 years, Michael Whelan’s art has graced the covers of more than 350 books and dozens of album covers, including Meat Loaf’s
Bat Out Of Hell II
and Michael Jackson’s
Victory
. But it is in the world of fantasy and science fiction novels that Whelan has made his biggest impact, illustrating covers that boast the names of such prominent genre writers as Isaac Asimov, Arthur C. Clarke, Robert A. Heinlein, Ray Bradbury, H. P. Lovecraft, Anne McCaf-frey, and Stephen King—who said on more than one occasion that Whelan illustrates the horror author’s characters “exactly as I had imagined them.”
And writers aren’t the only ones who have recognized Whelan’s abilities—he’s picked up 16 Hugo Awards, which celebrate sci-fi and fantasy works, as well as a slew of other awards and honors. He’s also done commissioned work for the Franklin Mint and the National Geographic Society.
AN ENGROSSING EDUCATION
When looking back at Whelan’s formative years, it’s not surprising that he ended up painting strange creatures in alien landscapes for a living. Born in Culver City, California, in 1950, Whelan spent his childhood moving to a different town nearly every year (his father worked in the aerospace industry). The one constant was
art. He’s always had a natural ability to draw and as a kid he loved the work of popular artists like Norman Rockwell and Maxfield Parrish. Combine Rockwell’s expressive people with Parrish’s imaginary worlds, and you get an idea of Whelan’s work.
Perhaps an even bigger inspiration, though, came from the year Whelan spent living near a missile testing site in White Sands, New Mexico. The teenager was awe-struck by the rockets as they emerged from the desert landscape and trailed off into the haze. “It was always thrilling to watch them go up,” he recalled, “and sometimes blow up!” The missile tests helped to plant the seed for the strange new worlds he’d eventually create. But what about the creatures that live in those worlds?
Whelan began to perfect those when he studied art at San Jose State University in the early 1970s. In addition to taking the traditional art classes, he spent a lot of time learning anatomy in the physiology department. Among his duties: building skeletons out of piles of bones and preparing cadavers for medical tests. He gained extensive knowledge of the human body . . . in all its gory detail. “You have to learn to draw the real before you can turn it into fantasy,” Whelan advises.
MORE THAN JUST A PRETTY (STRANGE) PICTURE
It didn’t take long for Whelan to get noticed—he illustrated his first book cover in 1975 and by ‘80 was among the most renowned genre artists in the world. So what exactly is it that makes Whelan’s work stand out? Lots of conceptual artists have created some bizarre worlds, but Whelan tries to take it a step further. Whether he’s drawing humans or aliens, he goes for what he calls “imaginative realism.” In an otherwise otherworldly picture, the viewer must be able to identify with something, be it the sadness of the heroine or the courage of a winged beast flying into a fiery horizon. The “realism” aspect comes into play in his landscapes as well: Whelan must first learn everything about the universe where his image will take place before he can fill in the tiny part he has to paint. And although these universes may be pure fantasy, each one must adhere to its own specific set of rules.

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