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Uncle John’s Heavy Duty Bathroom Reader@

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Uncle John’s Heavy Duty Bathroom Reader@
Bathroom Readers’ Institute
Portable Press (2012)

 

 

Uncle John’s Heavy Duty Bathroom Reader@
Bathroom Readers’ Institute
Portable Press (2012)

By the
Bathroom Readers’
Institute

Bathroom Readers’ Press
Ashland, Oregon

OUR “REGULAR”
READERS RAVE!

“Keep up the good work. I love your books and have almost every one of them. I got my Mom and Dad hooked on them two years ago, and my brother and wife recently started reading as well.”

—Jon

“You guys are amazing! I love fun trivia facts and history. My favorite thing about your book is that it is so random and funny.”

—John

“I love your books. They’re very educational and highly entertaining. I never want to set them down until I finish them. Keep them coming.”

—Roland

“Just a note to tell you that I’ve really enjoyed all 22 editions!”

—Michael

“I love
Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers!
I annoy everyone at school, my weirdo cousin, and my parents with your completely useless information. And it isn’t all useless. During school we do trivia, and I answer almost all of them correctly!”

—Megan

“I just wanted to say thank you for the book. I read it every day—it’s become my ‘Bathroom Bible.’”

—Katherine

“You guys are so amazingly smart! How do you know all this stuff? Like, come on, all the stuff I learned in
Did You Know?
and
Facts to Annoy Your Teacher
made me look just like Einstein!”

—Bobby

UNCLE JOHN’S HEAVY DUTY
BATHROOM READER
®

Copyright © 2010 by the Bathroom Readers’ Press (a division of Portable Press). All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

“Bathroom Reader,” “Portable Press,” and “Bathroom Readers’
Institute” are
registered trademarks of Baker & Taylor. All rights reserved.

For information, write:
The Bathroom Readers’ Institute
P.O. Box 1117,
Ashland, OR 97520
www.bathroomreader.com

Cover design by Michael Brunsfeld, San Rafael, CA (
[email protected]
)

BRI “technician” on the back cover: Larry Kelp

eISBN: 978-1-60710-650-0

E-book edition: June 2012

Hiya, Sophie! Hiya, Jesse!

THANK YOU!

The Bathroom Readers’ Institute sincerely thanks the people whose advice and assistance made this book possible
.

Gordon Javna

John Dollison

Brian Boone

Jay Newman

Thom Little

Amy Miller

Michael Brunsfeld

Angela Kern

Jolly Jeff Cheek

Jack Mingo

Erin Barrett

Jahnna Beecham

Malcolm Hillgartner

Megan Todd

Judy Plapinger

William Dooling

Jill Bellrose

Mikael Levin

Elizabeth Harvey

Michael Kerr

Christine DeGueron

James Greene Jr.

Leslie Weishar

Scarab Media

Amelia & Greta Zeve

Claudia Bauer

Geri Gale

Gary Morris

JoAnn Padgett

Melinda Allman

Monica Maestas

Amy & Annie

Ginger Winters

Maggie Javna

Matt Ofsanik

Tom “Yellow” Mustard

Sydney Stanley

David Calder

Karen Malchow

Elise Gochberg

Julie Bégin

Media Masters

Eddie Deezen

Publishers Group West

Bloomsbury Books

Raincoast Books

Porter the Wonder Dog

Thomas Crapper

Hiya, Sam! Hiya, Gideon!

CONTENTS

Because the BRI understands your reading needs, we’ve divided the contents by length as well as subject.
Short
—a quick read
Medium
—2 to 3 pages
Long
—for those extended visits, when something a little more involved is required
* Extended
—for those leg-numbing experiences

BATHROOM LORE

Short

Pot-tastrophes

Medium

Stalls of Terror

The #2 Amendment

Famous for 15…
Eww
!

The #2 Amendment

Uncle John’s Stall of Shame

POP SCIENCE

Medium

Dino Chow

Unobtainiums

How to Crack a Safe, Part I

Volcano Moon

How to Crack a Safe, Part II

How to Crack a Safe, Part III

TV OR NOT TV

Medium

Cancelled! Wait…

Meet Omar Shamshoon

No Finale

Mmm…Words

Dead TV

FORGOTTEN HISTORY

Short

Prankelangelo

Medium

The Datar Flop

Dustbin of History: Thomas Meagher

Long

Dustbin of History: The Pearl Harbor Spy, Part I

Resigned in Protest

Dustbin of History: The Pearl Harbor Spy, Part II

SPORTS

Short

Jersey Numbers

Baseball Contracts

Medium

Olympic Pranksters

NASCAR-tastrophies

Odd Sports

Ejected from the Olympics

Dumb Jock Crimes

The Florida White Sox

The Other Olympics

FADS & FLOPS

Short

Funny Business

Medium

Ch-ch-ch-Chia!

Product Flops

Meat the Beats

IT’S A BLUNDERFUL LIFE

Short

Embarrassed in the E.R.

Pasteur Cured Rabbis

Hang Up the Phone!

“9-1-Dumb, What’s Your Emergency?”

Don’t Drink and _______

Real Test Answers

Medium

Little Things Mean a Lot

“9-1-Dumb, What’s Your Emergency?”

Oops!

YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK

Medium

Govern-mental

Don’t Call Me Liz

Poli-Talks

BODY OF KNOWLEDGE

Short

Dreamy Facts

Odd-Phrodisiacs

Brain Power

Medium

I Stink, Therefore I Am

I Burp, Therefore I Am

Long

*Peoples and Their Diseases

AMERICANA

Short

What It Cost in 1980

Medium

City Lights

His Rotundity

Long

The Strange Fate of Big Nose George

*The Fearless Wonders

HI-TECH BITS & BYTES

Short

Big Brother 2.0

Medium

Dot Bombs

Cyber Cowboys

CREATURE FEATURES

Short

Aamazing Aardvarks

How to Tickle a Trout

Weird Fish Stories

Medium

185 Uses for a Pig

Weird Animal News

Turtle Stories

Do You Speak Dog?

Do You Speak Dog?

Long

*Uncle John’s Ants

BUSINE$$

Short

It Ain’t From There

(M)ad Men

Medium

The Mall: A History, Part I

Thinking Outside the Box

Children of the Corn

Long

A History of the Shopping Mall, Part II

The Cubicle

A History of the Shopping Mall, Part III

A History of the Shopping Mall, Part IV

HUT, HUT, HIKE!

Medium

The Packers Are in His Blood

The Madden Curse

Super Bowl I

The Super Bowl Can Kill You

College Rivals

FOOD & DRINK

Short

Pink Ping Pong

Gross Cocktails

How________ Got to Japan

Cereal Facts

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