Uncle John’s Slightly Irregular Bathroom Reader (24 page)

b)
Bonneville Salt Flats

c)
Everglades

d)
Death Valley

6.
The world’s largest monolith, Ayers Rock (1.5 miles wide and 1,100 feet high), is in Australia. What do the Aborigines call it?

a)
Azores

b)
Uluru

c)
Azimuth

d)
Illuka

Hollywood rumor: Johnny Carson wants his epitaph to read “I’ll be right back.”

7.
A desert is an area with little precipitation and few plants. What is a semi-arid grassy area on the periphery of a desert called?

a)
Steppe

b)
Strath

c)
Fallow

d)
Drumlin

8.
A small, steep-sided hill with a flat top is a pinnacle; a mediumsized one is a butte. What is a large one called?

a)
Mesa

b)
Arroyo

c)
Piedmont

d)
Atoll

9.
Tsunami
is a Japanese term used to describe tidal waves that are triggered by what?

a)
Oil drilling

b)
Whale migration

c)
El Niño

d)
Underwater earthquakes

10.
English is the second most commonly spoken language in the world. Hindi is the third. What’s the first?

a)
Spanish

b)
Russian

c)
Arabic

d)
Mandarin

11.
Since Australia is considered a continent, not an island, what is the largest island in the world?

a)
Greenland

b)
Great Britain

c)
Cyprus

d)
Madagascar

12.
A landlocked country is one that has no sea coast. Which of these countries is landlocked?

a)
Botswana

b)
Ghana

c)
Kenya

d)
Mauritania

13.
Granite is a type of rock formed from cooled magma. What is the geologic term for this type of rock?

a)
Metamorphic

b)
Sedimentary

c)
Stratus

d)
Igneous

If you’re average, a rope woven from your hair could support the weight of 400 people.

14.
The international date line is bent in several locations, but it generally runs along which line of longitude?

a)
0 degrees

b)
45 degrees

c)
90 degrees

d)
180 degrees

15.
California is the most populous state in the United States. What’s the least populous?

a)
Wyoming

b)
Rhode Island

c)
Montana

d)
North Dakota

16.
There are four main islands that make up the country of Japan. Which of these is not one of them?

a)
Honshu

b)
Shikoku

c)
Sapporo

d)
Hokkaido

17.
The Earth’s 23.5-degree tilt causes the sun’s rays to hit the northern and southern hemispheres differently. What is the result?

a)
Time zones

b)
Seasons

c)
Ice ages

d)
Day and night

18.
South Africa has three capitals. Cape Town is the legislative capital; Bloemfontein is the judicial. What is the administrative capital?

a)
Pretoria

b)
Durban

c)
Johannesburg

d)
Gaborone

19.
What is the only country in the world that has no official capital?

a)
Nauru

b)
Palau

c)
Kiribati

d)
Marshall Islands

20.
In 1887 L. L. Zamenhof developed a new language to solve communication problems between different cultures. What was it?

a)
Pidgin

b)
Creole

c)
Esperanto

d)
Pig Latin

Motor mouth: Cats can keep purring whether inhaling or exhaling.

Ever been in a video store with no idea what to rent? It happens to us all the time. So we decided to offer a few recommendations
.

B
OB ROBERTS
(1992)
Comedy

Review:
“Smart, funny political satire about a right-wing, folk-singing senatorial candidate who knows how to manipulate an audience—and the media.” (
Leonard Maltin’s Movie & Video Guide
)
Director/Star:
Tim Robbins.

THE TRIPLETS OF BELLEVILLE
(2003)
Foreign/Animated

Review:
“This animated film doesn’t need subtitles to tell a story that unfolds in a series of extraordinary images involving a boy, a dog, the Tour de France, the French mafia, and jazz-playing triplets. It’s comic, touching, and a visual knockout.” (
Rolling Stone
)
Director
: Sylvain Chomet.

PARENTS
(1989)
Horror/Comedy

Review:
“Dark satire of middle class suburban life in the ’50s, centering on a young boy who discovers that his parents aren’t getting their meat from the local butcher. Gives new meaning to leftovers and boasts a very disturbing barbecue scene.” (
Videohound’s Golden Movie Retriever
)
Stars:
Randy Quaid, Mary Beth Hurt.
Director:
Bob Balaban.

PI
(1998)
Thriller

Review:
“An obsessive mathematician seeks to find a number that will explain the universe. Gripping, clever theological and psychological thriller.” (
Halliwell’s Film and Video Guide
)
Stars:
Sean Gullette, Ben Shenkman.
Director:
Darren Aronofsky.

MICROCOSMOS
(1996)
Documentary

Review:
“What
Winged Migration
did for birds, this film does for the insect world. An astonishingly up-close and personal look at an infinitesimal world as alien as anything captured by the Hubble telescope—but also a world of strange and unexpected beauty.” (
Decent Films Guide
)
Directors:
Claude Nuridsany, Marie Perennou.

The crew of the
Enterprise
under Captain Kirk’s command: 430. Under Picard: 1,012.

WELCOME TO THE DOLLHOUSE
(1996)
Comedy/Drama

Review:
“Intensely personal tragicomedy about an 11-year-old girl facing vicious ridicule in junior high is an often somber (and more often hilarious) look at pre-teen ‘society.’ Winner of the Grand Jury Prize at the Sundance Film Festival.” (
Filmcritic.com
)
Stars:
Heather Matarazzo, Brendan Sexton, Jr.
Director:
Todd Solondz.

HAPPY ACCIDENTS
(2000)
Romance

Review:
“Ruby is a magnet for men with issues. Just when she thinks Sam is normal and romantic, he drops a bombshell—he claims he’s a time-traveler from the year 2470. It’s fun to speculate all through the movie whether he’s crazy or telling the truth.” (
themoviechicks.com
)
Stars:
Marisa Tomei, Vincent D’Onofrio.
Director:
Brad Anderson.

MY DOG SKIP
(2000)
Family

Review:
“Sweet (but not cloying) family film of author Willie Morris’ memoir of growing up in the 1940s with his beloved English fox terrier, who helps him through childhood and adolescence. Warm and winning for grownups as well as children...but have a handkerchief handy!” (
Leonard Maltin’s Movie and Video Guide
)
Stars:
Frankie Muniz, Diane Lane, Kevin Bacon.
Director:
Jay Russell.

HEAVENLY CREATURES
(1994)
Drama

Review:
“Two New Zealand schoolgirls conspire to murder one girl’s mother when parental concerns about their obsessive friendship threaten to separate them forever. Surreal scenes featuring unicorns, giant butterflies, castles, and claymation knights express the teens’ emotional slide into chilling actions.” (
Video Movie Guide
)
Stars:
Kate Winslet, Melanie Lynskey.
Director:
Peter Jackson.

THE GAME
(1997)
Thriller

Review:
“A mysterious company specializes in a tailor-made game. The player doesn’t know its point, purpose, or overall design until it’s over. An unusually imaginative thriller that bends its offbeat plot into so many twists that you actually have to pay attention.” (
Christian Science Monitor
)
Stars:
Michael Douglas, Sean Penn.
Director:
David Fincher.

On average, Hawaiian residents outlive those of all other U.S. states.

Don’t look now, but your fly is open. Ha ha—made you look!

G
IVE ME TACOS OR GIVE ME DEATH!

Prank:
In 1996 the fast-food chain Taco Bell issued a brief statement announcing its purchase of the Liberty Bell. According to the press release, Taco Bell was responding to an inquiry from the U.S. government about the possibility of reducing the national debt by selling off its national treasures to corporations. Taco Bell thought the Liberty Bell would make the ideal company logo. In fact, they planned to rename it the Taco Liberty Bell.

Reaction:
Then, just a few hours after the announcement, Taco Bell quietly issued a retraction, saying the whole thing had been a big joke. But by that time, the story had been widely reported by the news media. At a press briefing the next day, White House press secretary Mike McCurry was bombarded by hostile reporters who hadn’t yet heard the whole thing was a hoax. “We will also be selling the Lincoln Memorial to Ford Motor Company,” McCurry said, “and renaming it the Lincoln-Mercury Memorial.”

PAPER TRAIL

Prank #1:
The English paper manufacturer Donside holds an annual contest for graphic design students. The theme of the contest in 2000 was “Tell a Lie Convincingly,” using paper in some way. After hundreds of entries had been sent in, the participating schools received a letter from Donside Paper stating that the contest had been called off. Disappointed design students all over England began calling Donside to complain. But it turned out Donside hadn’t cancelled the contest. The letter was a prank...or a very clever contest entry.

Prank #2:
Just as Donside scrambled to get the contest back underway, students received another notice: the final deadline had been moved up. Entrants rushed to get their projects in on time, completely unaware that they’d been fooled again. Who sent the letters? No one knows.

Reaction:
Despite the fact that the Donside Paper Company announced that they wouldn’t punish the culprits and even offered to judge the pranks as contest entries, nobody ever came forward to claim responsibility for them.

A newborn baby’s heart has the same number of cells as an adult’s.

A MONUMENTAL HOAX

Prank:
Every student election seems to have a joke candidate, and the 1979 student body president election at the University of Wisconsin was no exception. Jim Mallon and Leon Varjian campaigned on a unique platform: to purchase and relocate the Statue of Liberty to Madison, Wisconsin.

Amazingly, they won. But voters didn’t take the pledge seriously—Mallon and Varjian couldn’t actually pull the stunt off. Or could they?

One winter morning, the instantly recognizable head and torch of the Statue of Liberty appeared, poking out from nearby Lake Mendota. Varjian told the UW student paper that he and Mallon tried to fulfill their campaign promise—but the cable transporting the statue via helicopter broke and, tragically, dropped the statue, partially submerging it. It wasn’t the real statue, of course—it was plywood papier-mâché and chicken wire; Mallon and Varjian had been secretly overseeing its construction for months. (The two insisted that it was the real Statue of Liberty.)

Aftermath:
The student newspaper later revealed that $4,500 of student money had been used to make the statue. Mallon and Varjian’s response: they offered to write a check to any interested student for their individual share of wasted funds—10¢ each. The statue was destroyed by unknown arsonists three weeks later, but the prankster duo won again next year and rebuilt the statue (this time they spent $6,000). That one was removed by the Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources. It now lives in a shed on campus.