Undaunted Love (PART TWO): Banished Saga, Book 3.5 (11 page)

“Where, Jeremy?”

He looked down. “It’s near the school where Clarissa used to teach.”

“We’re going to live in the West End?” Savannah asked, her flush paling at the thought.

He nodded. “I can’t afford much more. I’m starting to sell my work, and it’s selling at a decent price, but—”

She held her fingers up to his lips. “It doesn’t matter. Wherever we are, it will be home because we are together.”

***

“CLARISSA,” SAVANNAH SAID as I sat reading a newspaper. “I have to talk with you.”

I set my feet on the floor, uncurling from my comfortable position on the settee in the back parlor, a throw rug over my legs. I had made myself at home since I’d arrived at Sophronia’s almost a month ago. I sat up, watching Savannah as she sat in a chair next to me. Faint light entered into the back windows, dusk falling early on this late November afternoon. I reached over to turn on a light to better see Savannah, the light limning her face as she looked at me.

“What’s the matter, Sav?” I tossed aside the paper.

“I’m afraid you’re going to be very disappointed in me.”

“I’m not your mother,” I said as I watched her rise from her seat and pace the room. She moved from shadow to light, making it difficult for me to see her expression. “And I like to believe I am nothing like the grandparents. Please tell me what has you so agitated.”

“I’ve agreed to move in with Jeremy.” She turned to face me, straightening her shoulders with determination, as though preparing herself for my censure.

I gaped at her, my mouth ajar as a flush rose on her neck toward her cheeks. “What?”

“I’m never going to be completely free of Jonas, Rissa, as I’m not pursuing a divorce. I want to be with Jeremy.”

“If I understood correctly from the discussion we had when I arrived, you said you didn’t want to seek a divorce because you didn’t want the infamy that it would bring. How is moving in with another man while still married to your abusive husband diminishing the possibility of an uproar among Boston’s elite?”

“Rissa, please understand,” Savannah said as she sat next to me and clasped my hand.

“Why would you, who has always ensured that you were never subjected to vicious gossip, wish to court it now?”

She glared at me and released my hand, nearly throwing it at me. “What has social standing ever brought me except bruises, broken bones and disillusionment? I desire a life with a man who esteems me for the woman I am, not the woman he attempts to mold me into. Any uproar will pass, while I will remain with the man I love.”

“And how will you survive? You certainly won’t be able to live in a well-to-do neighborhood on what Jeremy can earn. What will happen to your love as you become more disillusioned with the life he can provide for you?”

“Is that all you think I care about? Money? Social prestige? My address?” Hurt entered her sky-blue eyes, and her indignant blush paled with each question.

“It’s all you used to care about,” I countered.

She blinked away tears as she watched me with disappointment lighting her eyes. “I want a life I can be proud of. A life that I know will bring me joy. Even if I’m living outside the bounds of what is deemed proper by society, I want a life with Jeremy.”

“What happens when you want a new coat or dress, and you aren’t able to afford it?” I asked.

“Do you really think me so shallow?” Savannah asked in a hurt whisper. I raised my eyebrows, waiting for her answer. “I’ll remind myself that my life with Jeremy is more important than any material item.”

“Good, because you’ll have to remind yourself, frequently, just that. You’ll have to be content with the simple life you build.” I beamed at her. “Finally the Savannah I know, the Savannah of my youth—before the grandparents’ took notice of you—has returned.”

She gaped at me for a moment before tears poured down her cheeks. “You did this on purpose? Doubting me? Pushing me?”

“Of course. For what I just asked and did will be nothing compared to what everyone else will do to you. You need to believe, without a shred of doubt, that your decision to be with Jeremy is what you want. And not allow anyone to persuade you otherwise.”

“It scares me how much I want to have a life with him, Rissa,” Savannah whispered. “It’s nothing like what I thought I felt for Jonas. With Jonas, it was all about what I had hoped to gain by being his wife.”

“And now?”

“Now it’s what I hope I can bring to him,” she said with a shy smile.

I gave a small whoop and hugged her tight. “Now we’ll be sisters-in-law, as well as cousins. Sisters,” I said, releasing her. “I couldn’t be happier for you or for Jeremy.” I bit my lip as I studied Savannah. “Do you plan to continue to live in Boston or will you move somewhere new?”

“I think, for now, we are going to remain here. Jeremy is receiving good commissions, enough for us to survive on. I can’t imagine too many changes in my life at once.”

I attempted to smile bravely, but knew I failed when Savannah frowned at me. “I was hoping you’d say you were planning to move to Missoula. To be near Gabriel and me. It was a foolish notion.”

“No, it wasn’t, Rissa. I hate that you’ll leave again.” Savannah swiped at her cheeks and at her tears. “Will Gabriel approve?”

I settled against the settee, a faraway look in my eyes for a moment. “Of course. He’s noticed how much Jeremy has improved in the letters he’s sent him and has suspected that a good portion of his improvement has been due to his association with you. It’s worried Gabriel, but he’d hoped you’d changed after your escape from Jonas.”

“I have, Rissa.”

“I know,” I said. I paused, biting my lip and blushing before I looked at her again. “Sav, what happens if you become with child? Do you want your child born with such a stigma?”

Savannah paled, the happy bloom fading at my question. “I’ll most likely never have any more children, Rissa.”

“Oh, Sav,” I whispered. “Why?”

“I can’t explain it, but I guess the birth went so badly that I’ll be unable to carry another child.”

“And this has been confirmed by other doctors, by doctors not working for Jonas?”

“The doctor I visited with Aunt Betsy’s urging yesterday said it was ‘Difficult to be certain, although very likely, that my womb was an inhospitable place for new life to thrive.’” Savannah mimicked the clipped tones of the doctor in an attempt to lessen the hurtfulness of the words.

I grimaced at the words.

“Yes, not the most tactful man. I thought Aunt Betsy was going to cane him for his lack of sensitivity,” Savannah said with a small smile. “It was the only amusing aspect of the visit.”

“I doubt Aunt Betsy acted like that to bring levity to the situation.”

“Of course not. She was irate.” Savannah met my eyes, unable to hide her despair at the prospect of a childless future. “I don’t fool myself, Rissa. I know there is a very small likelihood I’ll have another child.” She pleated her skirt. “And, if I’m fortunate enough to have Jeremy’s baby, I’ll cherish our child, no matter if it is sanctioned by the church and society or not. The previous blessings did little to aid me.”

“Sav,” I whispered. “I’m sorry you suffered so terribly.”

“I don’t want to continue to focus on the past, Rissa. I must focus on my future.”

I forced a brave smile. “Well, if you want to focus on your future, you should think about how you’re going to live with Jeremy. You won’t have a cook or maids to help you when you live with him. I’d recommend purchasing clothes that are easy to don without aid. Can you still cook?”

“I think so.”

“I never understood why your mother stopped you from learning from your cook when you were a girl. Why would she think it was beneath you to learn to prepare meals for yourself? And it will be especially important now.” I paused for a moment. “I wonder if Sophie’s cook would mind you spending time with her?”

Savannah flushed. “I know she wouldn’t. I’ve spent many afternoons with her recently. I remember much of what I had learned, and, the rest, I’m finding easy to relearn. I love spending time in the kitchen.”

“I wish I could say the same,” I said with a wry smile.

“What is it you wish you liked?” Sophie asked as she entered.

“That I liked working in the kitchen,” I said.

“I hope there are restaurants you can frequent,” Savannah said with a giggle.

“There are,” I said.

“I know there’s been momentous news as the door was shut,” Sophie said. She turned from Savannah to me, as though she were uncertain which of us had the news. I blushed but nodded toward Savannah.

“I’ve decided to move in with Mr. McLeod,” Savannah said.

“Even though this will bring down as much, if not more, infamy than any divorce proceeding?” Sophie raised an eyebrow. “You take after Mrs. Woodhull.”

“Mrs. Who?” Savannah asked.

“Really, don’t you know your history?” Sophie glanced from Savannah to me. “She’s the first woman to run for president of the United States. She’s also one of the earliest proponents for women to practice ‘free love.’”

“Free love?” I sputtered.

“You laugh, Clarissa, but the time will come when women can live with whom they choose without worrying they are defying their families. And they will be able to decide if they want to marry the man or not.”

Savannah blushed. “I believe you are reading too much into this, Sophie.”

“As you always say. I’m glad you’re finally coming to your senses and realizing living with me isn’t how you want to spend the rest of your life.”

I curled my feet under me again as I settled onto the settee. “I’ve warned Savannah about how hard it can be with the limited income Jeremy can earn.”

Sophronia smiled mischievously. “I’d think you’d sell your story to the papers. Rather than have me buy them off. Why not approach them and sell it to the highest bidder? It would make a nice nest egg for whenever you needed it.”

“I couldn’t,” Savannah whispered.

“Why not?” Sophie asked. “Someone at one of those papers will discover your story and exploit it for the good people of Boston. I don’t see why you don’t make a profit from it.”

“I’d have to discuss this with Jeremy,” Savannah said.

I could see her thinking through the possibilities and shared a small smile with Sophie.

“As I said before, dear, try for a serial format,” Sophie said. “Bleed them for all they’re worth, just as they’ll try to receive as much as they can from their readership.”

CHAPTER 10

THAT EVENING I SAT in the casual rear parlor, attempting to read
The Wings of the Dove
. My gaze continued to rise to Savannah. She fidgeted with her needlepoint, and I saw her grimace a few times as she pricked her finger rather than the cloth with the needle. “Sav, are you all right?”

“I’m fine, Rissa,” Savannah said, setting down her needlepoint with a sigh. “Jeremy is going to call tonight.”

“That’s wonderful! I haven’t spent nearly enough time with him since I arrived.”

Sophronia glanced over from the desk, tapping the tip of her pen on a sheet of paper. “Something else has you a bundle of nerves. Is it that man?”

“No, I’ve had no word from Jonas. I know that should worry me, but all I feel is relief.” Savannah took a deep breath. “My father is also coming this evening. I wanted him to meet Jeremy.”

“Why didn’t you inform me before now?” Sophie asked as she reached for her cane and rose. “Let’s move to the larger sitting room. With any luck, your brother will join your father and entertain us with his piano playing.”

I stood, holding my book in one hand, reaching for Savannah and giving her a one-armed embrace as we moved to the front of the house and the larger sitting room. “Don’t worry, Sav. I know Uncle Martin will approve of Jeremy.”

Savannah smiled at my attempt to bolster her nerves. We had barely settled when Poole knocked on the door.

“A Mr. McLeod to see you, ma’am,” he intoned.

“Please bring him up. And when Mr. Russell arrives, he is welcome too,” Sophronia said.

I set aside my book as I heard Jeremy’s footsteps approaching the doorway. When I saw Savannah merely nod at him in welcome, I jumped up from my chair to embrace him. “Jeremy, it’s wonderful to see you again.”

He gripped me tightly for a moment before easing away. “And you, Clarissa. I hope you are enjoying your stay.”

I sat, motioning for him to sit on the settee next to me. He watched Savannah as though attempting to gauge the reason behind her reticence. “I am. I’ve been to the museum, and I’m hopeful to attend the symphony soon.”

“I imagine those are events not enjoyed in Montana.” Although he spoke with me, his gaze remained on Savannah, and I sensed a rising tension in him at her silence.

I smiled my agreement as Sophie
harrumphed
at the mention of Montana. “There is culture and art there but not of the same quality.”

“I hope I can add to your enjoyment,” Lucas said as he strolled into the room, a breathless Poole glowering at him in the doorway.

We all rose to greet Lucas and Uncle Martin. Savannah gripped her father’s arm as she turned toward Jeremy. “Father, I’d like to introduce you to Jeremy McLeod. He’s Gabriel’s brother. And my friend.”