Under My Skin (Shady Falls Series Book 2) (25 page)

              “Moni’s coming here, she said she needs to talk to us,” I told Cade the moment I walked into the room.

              “What’s up?” Cade asked, a look of concern crossed his face. We both knew it was rare for Moni to ask to see us, something was going on.

              “I don’t know. She should be here soon.” I looked around, the room was pretty much perfect. It looked like a pit stall. One of Julius’ old cars sat in the middle of the room, ready for practice. There was an area designated for speed and agility drills, an area with parts of axels sticking out of the wall for tire changing drills, and strength training equipment, all ready for team use. Everything we designed was meant to increase speed and stamina.

              I looked around the room, pleased with the results, but the brief conversation with Monique had me thinking. Could I be happy with this forever? Was this gym enough to keep me happy? I guessed it would have to be, if the restaurant fell through, who knew how long it would take to find another.

              “Where’s Mia been?” Cade asked. I didn’t confide in him about our dates or the fact that I couldn’t just sleep with her like I had the others. Hell, I wasn’t sure I was even ready to understand what that meant. I’d wanted her; I’d always wanted her, but the reality of what was happening between us was too much at the moment.

              “She’s been around,” I said. “She’s here every day.” She was always around; so close yet so far away.

              “Yeah, but not with you. You’ve barely talked in weeks.”

              “Been busy. We’re workin’ eighteen hours a day here and when I’m actually not here I’m sleepin’ or tryin’ to figure out what’s goin’ on with the restaurant. There ain’t time to figure out what’s goin’ on with Mia.”

              Cade shook his head and scowled. “You’re gonna fuck this up, aren’t you?” He paused and sighed. “This place can’t be everything. Work can’t be everything.”

              “Who the hell are you to lecture me? You haven’t been with one woman for how long?”

              I wasn’t sure what I was doing when it came to Mia. I wanted her, but part of me still didn’t trust her.

              “This ain’t about me, brother. This is about you. You’ve wanted this woman for years and now that you can finally have her, you’re gonna push her away? That’s stupid and pretty screwed up.”

              “Jake? Cade?” Monique called out in a loud, questioning tone, putting an abrupt end to our conversation.

              “Yeah,” Cade said, popping up from behind the car. “We’re right here.”

              Turning to me, he said one last thing. “You’re my brother and I’d like to see you stop screwin’ up your life and finally figure yourself out. If Moni’s here with bad news, we’ll figure it out. This isn’t the only building for sale.”

              I didn’t want to say this was the only one I wanted. Yeah, there were other buildings, but none of the others even compared.

              We walked toward her silently. I tried to read Monique’s expressionless face, with no use. There was no telling what she was going to tell us, but good or bad, I’d deal with it. Cade wouldn’t let me dwell if it was bad news, and I had a feeling he’d force me to look closer at some of the other buildings we’d recently viewed.

              I forced a smile when we approached, even though I felt like I was going to be sick. I knew whatever news she had was going to be bad. It had to be, why else would she want to see us immediately?

              “Well damn,” she said. “You look like shit.”

              “Depends on what you’re here to tell us.” There was far too much honesty in that comment. Her news could either make or break me.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Mia

Two weeks. Two weeks of short answers, text messages, and empty promises of spending time together. Two weeks of passing glances and longing. He wasn’t completely ignoring me, but it certainly felt like he was pulling away. I wasn’t even sure what I did wrong this time.

Jake ran around the gym, constantly busy with preparing new trainers, coaching customers, and organizing the new addition to his and Cade’s business. He hardly looked my way.

Monique strode through the gym, long legs stretching beneath the short, black skirt she wore. Her six-inch heels probably made her barely shorter than Jake. Her thin body looked perfect in the professional skirt suit she wore. She was gorgeous and she knew it, and even though they both insisted there was nothing between them, I had a hard time believing it. Especially when she walked straight into the back area where I knew Jake was working on the new addition.

Why was she welcome back there, but I felt like I didn’t belong? Why couldn’t I have the confidence that seemed to come so naturally to her? I wanted to know what was happening back there and why she was there, but I’d never go see for myself. I’d just fume and push myself through my workout.

“Why do you look like you’re ready to kill someone or cry?” Derek asked as he neared me.

Emma and I worked a shift together last weekend at Uncle Bobby’s bar. She was excited when she told me Derek was hired at the gym. I knew once Jake found out Derek had lost his job, he would do something to help him out.

“I’m not,” I said, rather unconvincingly.

“Bullshit, Mia. You look like you’re ready to tear someone apart, specifically the woman who just went back to see Jake and Cade.”

My whole body deflated. “I don’t know, Derek. I don’t get it. Things were goin’ well with Jake, but now I’m not sure. He’s barely talked to me in weeks and now she’s here and
she’s
goin’ back there.”

“He’s just busy with everythin’, Mia. You gotta give him a chance to get it all straightened out.”

“Yeah, but he hasn’t invited me back there. He coulda asked me to visit with him if he wanted. He coulda asked me to help.”

The more I talked, the angrier and sadder I became. He could’ve asked me for help or made some kind of effort to see me for more than a moment in passing. Hell, he’s even had other people walking me to my car when I leave to make sure Grant wasn’t around and following me. If he was so worried about me, wouldn’t he make a point to at least make sure I got home safely?

Grant hadn’t been seen in the past two weeks, but I always knew he was around. He made sure I knew. He’d leave little notes or a single flower on my car or on the sidewalk outside of school or the bar. The last time I bartended, there was a letter or something taped to my bedroom window. I didn’t find out what it was because Julius and Toni found it and burned it before I had the chance.

Irritated beyond words, I stood and looked up at Derek. “I’m leavin’. I’m goin’ home now. See y’all tomorrow.”

I tried to storm past him, but his hulking frame stood in front of me and wouldn’t let me pass.

“Don’t leave pissed off, Mia. Let me go get him so you can talk. I’m sure that woman doesn’t mean anything.”

“He’s fucked her, Derek. They’ve been screwin’ around for years. They both promised nothin’ was goin’ on. Hell she made it a point to tell me there was nothin’ there between them anymore. But explain why he’s seein’ her, but he’s barely talked to me.”

By the time I was done with my rant, my cheeks were wet and Derek looked incredibly uncomfortable. I actually giggled to myself at the sight of Derek’s dumbfounded look.

“I’m sorry, Derek,” I giggled out. “You don’t need this shit. Anyway, I’m goin’ home.”

“Well, at least let me walk you out.”

I nodded. “Thanks, Derek. Just let me get my things.”

The drive home was uneventful, except for my ringing phone. One glance at the screen told me it was Jake calling.

Now he was going to call me. He’d basically ignored me for weeks and now he wanted to talk? Derek probably ran back there the moment I left and told him how unhinged I was.

I pulled around the back of the bar and sighed. Toni and Julius weren’t home and the house was completely dark. She had texted earlier in the day to warn me she’d be at Julius’ for the night. So the darkness shouldn’t have been a surprise.

But I didn’t feel like being alone.

“Mia,” a voice called from the shadows.

I froze at the sound of my name. Turning around, I couldn’t see where the voice came from, but I knew to whom it belonged.

“Mia, stop,” Grant growled low from the shadows.

“You aren’t supposed to be here,” I said turning around, trying to see him before he came out. My heart raced and my breathing was ragged. My limbs trembled and I was terrified I’d stumble with my legs trembling like gelatin.

“I’m not playing this game with you anymore,” he snapped. His voice clipped with every word.

“I ain’t playin’ games, Grant. You ain’t supposed to be near me.” I slid my hand in my pocket and without even looking, I pressed the screen on my phone. I didn’t know who, but I was calling someone. It should be either Bobby, Emma, or Toni at the top of the list. I just hoped whoever I called answered and heard there was a problem.

“Don’t worry, Mia. I’m not here to hurt you. I just want to talk.” He stayed to the shadows, but his voice sounded nearer. My stomach tumbled and rolled, so scared I was planted in my spot.

“Grant, I don’t wanna talk to you.” I tried to keep my voice calm and firm, but I could hear the tremble in my words. “You need to go and leave me alone, or I’ll have no choice but to contact the police.”

“Mia!” Emma shouted from the backdoor of the bar. “You okay, honey?”

“I’ll be back, Mia,” Grant growled. “We’ll talk soon.”

“Em, Grant’s out here. Get Bobby,” I shouted, but I knew it was too late. The sound of an engine rolling over and revving echoed through the silent mid-December evening.

I hurried through the parking lot and stepped onto the porch just in time to see Bobby burst through the kitchen door and come outside.

“Where is he?” he shouted.

“He left,” I whispered. “But he said he’d be back.”

“Son of a bitch. Why were you out here alone?” he asked harshly. I flinched at the accusing way he questioned me, like it was my fault Grant was following me around and hiding in the dark waiting.

“I ain’t gonna be a prisoner, Bobby!” I snapped. “I didn’t do anything wrong. All I did was drive home from the gym.”

“Where the hell’s Jake?” he barked. “He’s supposed to follow you home. He’s supposed to be watchin’ you.”

“Well he was busy. Everyone has their own lives and no one has time to babysit me. Besides, I can take care of myself. I ain’t gonna hide and be afraid of that asshole.”

Settling down, Bobby breathed out a long, frustrated breath. “Honey, I’m sorry. I ain’t mad at you, I’m just pissed nothin’ seems to get through to that cocksucker. You shouldn’t be out alone. That guy’s unstable. Followin’ a girl around just because she broke up with you ain’t normal.”

I nodded. “I understand. I’m just so sick of havin’ to look over my shoulder.”

“Is this the first time you’ve seen him since we got the restraining order?”

I looked away, not wanting to admit the truth, but I shook my head. Grant never went away. He was always near. He always let me know he was close.

“Dammit, Mia. Have you told Jake?” Bobby asked.

“Why would I tell him? We barely talk. We ain’t together.”

“I thought …” he said, his voice trailing off.

“Well, you thought wrong,” I huffed. I pushed past him and into the bar. I was sick of this conversation.

I sat down at the bar and waited for Emma to come over.

“What can I get you?” she asked with a smile.

“Rum and coke, and a shot of tequila,” I demanded with a determined voice.

Emma just stood there and stared at me for a moment. When I didn’t say anything she finally spoke.

“Are you sure, Mia?” she asked.

“Yeah, Em. Thanks.” I said, noticing her look over at Bobby before turning and pouring my drinks.

The liquid went down easier than normal, and I downed the shot. I nodded to Emma for another. She didn’t say a word; she only filled my glasses every time they went empty.

The music was loud and the other barflies were louder. My head was fuzzy and I felt like I was floating above and beyond the room. I’d lost track of how many drinks I had and why exactly I’d started drinking in the first place, which was probably the point. When I looked around the room, I felt like I was moving in slow motion. My mind raced with nonsensical words and thoughts, but my body felt sluggish and weighed down.

One moment I was laughing giddily at nothing at all and the next moment I was ready to dissolve in a puddle of tears. If I weren’t feeling so good, I would’ve been embarrassed by my rampant mood swings. But there was no embarrassment, no worry, just alcohol-fueled happiness.

What didn’t I have to be happy about? After all, I had some great friends – none of which were here. I had a great job I loved – but it wasn’t enough. And I had Jake – but I didn’t actually have him, did I?

Tears, there were the damned tears again. My muddled mind couldn’t grasp why those thoughts brought tears streaming down my cheeks. It wasn’t so bad being alone. I liked being alone, I was used to it. 

Emma placed another drink in front of me, but this one tasted different. Squinting my eyes, I looked at the clear drink and realized this wasn’t my drink. Where did my drink go? This was water. I didn’t want water.

“What the hell is this?” I said, but my voice sounded weird and my words were slurred. Why the hell did I slur my words?

“Honey, it’s time for you to take a break,” Emma said. She stood in front of me and touched my hand.

“Bullshit, Em. Why’re you cuttin’ me off? I’ve barely even begun.” Begun … that word sounded weird. I giggled thinking about strange words. Maybe I did have a little too much to drink. But it felt good not thinking about … anything. But I was thinking, just none of it made any sense.

“Honey, you’ve been here for hours and you’ve had almost an entire fifth of rum to yourself. If you were anyone else, I woulda cut you off a long time ago.” She paused. Why did she just stop talking like that? “Just drink your water. We’ll get you home soon.”

“No,” I argued, but then stopped. I forgot what I was going to say.
Why was I arguing?
Then I remembered. “I don’t wanna go home. No one’s there,” I complained. “I’m sick of bein’ alone. I’m always alone. Even when I don’t think I’m alone, I’m alone, ‘cause Jake don’t want me and I don’t want no one else.” My forehead hit the bar and I winced as the pain shot through my head. What the hell was I saying? I couldn’t think through the throbbing in my brain. “Why does my head hurt so badly?” I mumbled into the wooden bar.

“Mia, why are you here drinkin’ like this tonight? I gotta admit, I’ve never seen you drink like this before.”

“I don’t drink.” I turned my head to the side so my words weren’t muffled by the wooden bar.

“You coulda fooled me,” Emma said. “Is it about Grant bein’ outside?”

“Hell no. I couldn’t care less about Grant and his stupid shit,” I said a little louder than I probably should have, given my throbbing head.

“Well then, is it about what happened at the gym?” she pushed.

“Nothin’ happened at the gym. Jake didn’t talk to me, but he talked to his long-legged whatever. They’re just friends, but they ain’t just friends. What-the-fuck-ever!” I was quiet for a moment, then realization slowly hit. Everything seemed to hit slowly. “How did you know about that?”

“Derek,” Emma said. “He’s here now. He walked you to your car, remember?”

“Yeah,” I sighed. Lying my head down on the unrelenting hard wood, I stared at the television. I swore I could hear the beat of my heart and the throbbing in my head was keeping steady pace.

I waited a few moments before sitting up. I couldn’t focus on anything, the room seemed to be spinning and I couldn’t see anything other than what was directly in front of me. “I gotta … I gotta go home.”

I stood too fast. Room spinning like a top, I couldn’t feel my legs or my feet beneath me. I was probably going to lose everything all over Uncle Bobby’s shiny floor. The world tilted and I knew I was going down, but I was too gone to stop myself.

Strong arms wrapped around me and lifted me off the ground, and the world went black.