Underwater (16 page)

I told you to stay away from her!
Saxon’s voice raged inside my head. Isolde’s grimace turned toward the bluish green streak skimming through the lake toward us.

Hayden brought his hands to his ears, and he started looking around, while Evey dropped her arms limply at her sides and flopped her mouth open. Yep, they’d heard it too. I watched as Hayden took hold of Evey’s shoulder and pointed at Saxon, who’d crested out of the water, his fin catching the sunlight like thousands of tiny mirrors, then landed back in with nary a splash. It was awe-inspiring to watch him approach us. He moved so fast, he was scarcely more than a streak, but I could hear his argument with Isolde in his head as clearly as I could hear the water lapping against the side of my neck.

It seems you were caught in a lie, Saxon.

With her hands gone from my head, I felt a sudden rush of anger fill me up. She’d tried to kill me.
Again
. And she
did
kill Ian. Pulling my arm back, I closed my fist, and rammed it into the side of her head with as much strength as I could muster.

Screeching, Isolde rolled to the side, cupping her face.
You little imbecile!

I started swimming away. “Two years of daily upper body work. You messed with the wrong gimp.”

Get away from her, Isolde. I won’t say it again.

Gnashing her teeth, Isolde darted away from me, her fin moving up and down
.
Her hair looked like plastic streamers, wavering behind her as she moved.

I could hear Evey crying my name on the beach. I wanted to tell her to be quiet, that Mom would hear her if she kept screaming. But whenever my lips parted, my mouth filled with lake water.

Saxon looped around us, blocking Isolde from swimming away.
What have you told her?

She swung her fin around, slamming it into his side and creating a wave at the surface so big I heard Hayden and Evey stumble backwards on the rocky beach.
If you aren’t willing to tell the worthless human what she’s doing to you, then I am. I won’t watch you perish. Not for her.

Saxon surfaced, his dark hair slicked down on his head, his lashes clumped together in dripping sections. He moved to touch me, but Isolde was approaching us. When he blocked her, his movement caused a second roll of lake water to heave toward the beach.
Luna, are you all right? Did she hurt you?

My arms ached from treading water, and now that I was done fighting with Isolde, the cold stiffened my joints. “Fine. I—” My words turned into gurgles as soon as the wave he’d created hit me, taking me down. I sank, and Evey’s muffled screams filled my ears.

Saxon dove for me, and Isolde disappeared in the dark abyss. Her maniacal cackle drifted off as she went. When Saxon enveloped me in his arms, blessed warmth rushed through my body, filling every corner when he lifted me back to the surface.

Sucking in a long breath, I wrapped my arms around Saxon and pressed my face to his neck. “W-we…n-need…t-to talk.” My teeth were chattering. I wasn’t sure what hurt more: the fact that Isolde had accosted me or the fact that Saxon was practically already sentenced to death. My heart seized, and I squeezed my eyes shut.

I had to protect Saxon now. The same way he protected me.

You’re OK now. It’s OK.
He cradled me against his chest. He swam me back to the embankment where Evey and Hayden were waiting, horrified. Evey’s nose was red, and there were tear streaks on her cheeks. We all slipped into the most awkward of all awkward silences.

Hayden just stared down at Saxon as he lifted me onto the rocks, his eyes huge. His face was pale. It looked as though he might tip over. He, too, looked as if there had been some tears shed. Probably because he’d just seen his supposedly dead brother and discovered that Mer were real. It’d been a hell of a day.

“Luna?” Evey whispered, frozen in place.

Water rolled from my hair in tiny rivers down my face and neck as I looked up at my sister and her unofficial boyfriend. “Saxon and I have, um,
a lot
to explain to you guys.”

Chapter Sixteen

“So…you’re saying that this has all been happening…
under
the water, for hundreds of years, and nobody knew about it?” Evey’s voice was calm, but the way her hands trembled told another story.

Saxon nodded, his gaze grazing her face and then Hayden’s. His jaw was so tense, it looked carved out of stone. In the moonlight filtering into my bedroom through the window, the closed gills on the side of his neck looked like three lines drawn with magic marker against his skin. It was clear telling Hayden and Evey the truth about where he came from, and what he really
was
, killed him.

When Hayden’s mouth opened, and he drew breath, the three of us stilled. He’d not uttered a word since climbing through my bedroom window thirty minutes earlier—even when Saxon broke the news that Isolde had drowned his brother, who was now in the process of acclimating himself to his new life as a Mer.

“You mean to tell me that my brother isn’t dead?” His voice was low so my parents—who were sleeping in separate rooms upstairs—wouldn’t wake up to discover Evey and I had snuck not one, but two boys in.

“No.” Saxon cleared his throat. Speaking telepathically would probably send both Evey and Hayden over the edge. Saxon didn’t want to take any chances at freaking them out anymore than he’d already done. “What I’m saying is, your brother died. His human life ended.”

Hayden raised his eyes to meet Saxon’s, his blond eyebrows furrowed. “I don’t understand. I saw him today.
I saw him
. He waved his arms like he wanted help. I saw it.”

I reached out to touch Hayden’s hand, but he shifted away from me. “Yes. You saw Ian. But that wasn’t the Ian you grew up with.”

Hayden glared at us. “Well then who the hell is it?”

“Ian is a Mer now.” The tendons in Saxon’s neck tightened. “He is adapting to his new body and to breathing through gills and—”

Hayden snorted. “This is so screwed up. You want me to believe that he’s a friggin’ fish now?”

“
Mer
.” Saxon’s jaw twitched. “And whether or not you believe it is your business. I’m just giving you the facts.”

“Sax, calm down.” I covered his hand with mine. “Hayden is just taking this all in.”

Hayden scowled at Saxon. “If he’s a
Mer
, why didn’t I see a fin?”

“You only saw him from across Moon’s Bay.” Saxon rested his elbows on his knees and leaned forward. “By the time we got to the beach, he was gone. But you didn’t see him surface again, did you?”

Hayden glowered for a minute, then shook his head.

Saxon’s shoulders dropped a few inches. “That’s because once he came to the surface, he couldn’t breathe.”

Evey pointed at Saxon, her eyes wide. “But you can breathe. If you can, then why can’t Ian?”

“Because Saxon shifts when he comes to the surface.” Evey and Hayden both looked at me with confused expressions. “I’ve seen it.”

Evey dropped her jaw. “You’ve seen it?”

Nodding, I tried to shrug casually, but I wasn’t sure I’d ever get used to witnessing it. “Saxon can control when and where he shifts. That’s why he was sick that day in the woods, Ev. He’d been out of the water for too long and gotten too warm.”

Evey shuddered and gestured to my open window. “That’s why the window is open?”

Saxon nodded. “The longer a Mer is out of the water, the worse they feel. If we’re in a house or building that’s too warm, it makes us sicker sooner. But I’m usually able to stay out of water for eight to ten hours at a time, though it can be uncomfortable at times.”

Hayden scowled. “Why can’t Ian come out of the water for that long? Why can’t he shift, or whatever, and come to tell my parents he’s alive?”

“Because he’s
not
alive.” Saxon’s voice was overly calm. “He’s alive now only in Mer form. But if he chooses not to accept his new life, he’ll die when he comes out of the water.”

Hayden raked a hand through his white-blond hair. “But you…
you
can…”

“I’ve been shifting for years. I’m accustomed to holding my breath until my gills close.” Saxon glanced at me, then went on. “It will take your brother some time before he will learn how to shift. Once he starts, it will take even more time to learn to control his shifts, so that they don’t happen spontaneously. This is how many altered humans die after they’ve been turned Mer. They shift and try to go to see their families, but their bodies aren’t ready. If the process starts while they’re in the woods, and too far from water, they suffocate.”

Evey drew in a sharp breath. “That’s what Ian was doing!” I pressed a finger to my lips, and she dropped her voice back down to a whisper. “He saw you on the dock and was trying to communicate with you.”

“He likely came out of the water, but couldn’t stand the oxygen. That’s why he had to go back under before you reached the beach.” Saxon chewed his lip for a moment. “He’s been bound. And he’s under guard now.”

“You’ve got him tied up down there?” Hayden’s voice cracked. “What the hell, dude? Who does that?”

“It’s for his own good.” Saxon spoke through locked jaw.

“Tying him down at the bottom of the lake is for his own good?” Hayden was breathing heavily, and I wasn’t sure if he was on the verge of crying or punching Sax.

Saxon scooted forward on the edge of my bed, so his knees were just an inch apart from Hayden’s. “It’s either that, or your brother is going to die.
Again
. For good.”

“God…” Hayden’s single word came out quiet and ragged—a prayer, maybe? Or maybe just a declaration. I closed my eyes, trying to shut out the pain in his voice. “This is…this is just…it’s too much.”

Evey put her hand on his leg, patting it comfortingly. “It’s OK. It’s gonna be OK.”

I raised one of my eyebrows high on my forehead, but the darkness in the room hid my appraisal. After a few beats, she looked up at me. The moonlight caught in the tears in her eyes, and the sight clutched my throat like a giant hand.

She whispered. “What can we do? I don’t want him to die.”

“Again,” Hayden added softly.

I picked at the edge of the pillow I hugged to my chest. “I guess…right now, we need to hope Ian stays underwater.”

“Will he, though?” Hayden spoke more forcefully. “I mean, he’s stubborn. Really stubborn. Will you be able to contain him? Could he get away again?”

Saxon hesitated. “It’s possible. It depends on how determined a person is.”

Evey, Hayden, and I all exchanged telling glances. If you looked up
determined
in the dictionary, there would be a picture of Ian.

“He’ll come back to the surface.” Hayden shook his head. “He’s not gonna want to be cooped up. He fights with my parents all the time about curfews and having more freedom and all that. He’s gonna escape again. I know it.”

We all stared at him, none of us knowing what exactly to say. There was a distinct possibility that Hayden would have to suffer through his brother dying
again
.

“If this is the only way he’s going to live,” he said, his voice hoarse, “then we have to make him stay down there until he accepts it.”

Saxon scraped his palm across the bottom half of his face. “I’ll do everything I can to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

“What can we do?” I covered his forearm with my hand, enjoying the way warmth soaked into my body.

Saxon stared at the floor, his expression positively icy. “You’ve all been exposed to too much.”

“He’s my brother.” Hayden sat up straight in his seat. “I’m not gonna lose him twice.”

Saxon leveled his gaze on him. “You can’t tell your parents. You can’t tell a soul. Either of you.” He took his time scrolling his eyes to Evey. “If you tell, and my people are outed, I’ll be executed. And after I am dead, more lives will be lost trying to hide the clan. This will result in more deaths, on both sides. Yours included. This is very serious. Do you understand me?”

Both Evey and Hayden nodded, their eyes wide. The air in the room became thick with the gravity of the situation. This was so much heavier than a big algebra final or a social blunder in the hallway before first period. This was about life and death and the protection of an entire society.

This was about the protection of Saxon.

Saxon fixed his stare on Hayden. “If you see him again, and you have the time to communicate with him at all, you need to tell him to stay put. If he doesn’t remain under the surface to allow the bond with Isolde to become complete, he will undoubtedly die.”

Evey sucked in a sharp breath. “We will. But how…” Her eyes darted to mine. “How do you guys, you know, change people?”

I stared at the side of Saxon’s face as he explained to Evey how Mer alter humans, but barely heard a word of it. Saxon didn’t know that I was aware of his impending doom, and my moods were evenly split between enraged and terrified. He’d lied to me. He knew that the Council was on to him, and he’d kept it from me. That was the equivalent of finding out that you had terminal cancer, but telling your girlfriend you had a cold.

I couldn’t lose Saxon. Not because I was desperate to keep a guy. I wasn’t that pathetic. I’d discovered something infinitely more important than having a boyfriend. Saxon was an amazing friend. When we talked, he listened—and I mean,
really
listened. Boys tended either to ignore ninety percent of what a girl said or they told you just enough of what you wanted to hear to get their tongues down your throat. But not Saxon. Saxon
conversed
with me. He laughed with me. And in his eyes, I was every bit as strong as he was. To me, that was priceless.

He’d become my best friend.

I felt Evey’s eyes land on the side of my face. “What?”

“You’re not going to let him…you know?” She swallowed. “Alter you. Are you?”

Saxon’s voice filled the air. “Absolutely not.”

My heart wrenched inside of my chest. I’d foolishly tricked myself into thinking that would mean I would share him with the lake for the rest of our time together. Now I knew that if he didn’t mate—with me, or anyone for that matter—he was going to be put to death.

Evey frowned. “But you just said that you could be exiled—”

“I won’t be.” He glanced at me and pressed his lips together. “I’ve got it under control.”

“So will you, um,
mate
with someone else, then?” Hayden asked, avoiding my eyes.

“No. Absolutely not.” Saxon laced his fingers with mine and squeezed. “I’m with Luna. I don’t think I could mate with another, even if I tried.”

I bit the insides of my cheeks to keep from tearing up, a ball of raw guilt started to grow in my stomach.

Evey’s head snapped in my direction, and she reached out to take hold of my other arm. “Don’t ever do it. Don’t let him alter you.” Saxon moved in his spot uncomfortably, raking a hand through his hair and adjusted the torn T-shirt he wore. “I mean, no offense, Saxon. But I just…I just don’t want anything like what happened to Ian to happen to Luna.”

“Agreed,” he said.

My tongue felt swollen, and I couldn’t form words for a minute. I didn’t know what to say to my sister. I didn’t want to say goodbye to my family. I didn’t want to restrict myself to the bottom of the Pend Oreille Lake for the rest of my life. And I didn’t want to
die.
No guy—no matter how amazing he was—was worth surrendering my human life. But if Saxon was going to be murdered how would I live with myself knowing I could have stopped it?

Hayden looked down at his watch and sighed. “My mom checks on me every couple hours these days. If I’m not in my bed when she comes in tonight, she’ll have the Sandpoint police out in five minutes flat.”

Evey stood up. “You should go then.”

Saxon stood and grasped Hayden’s shoulder. “I’m sorry. For everything.”

“It’s not your fault. And I won’t tell anyone. As long as you protect Ian.”

When Saxon nodded, his brown hair flopped over his forehead. “I will. I promise.”

Evey opened the window further so Hayden would fit through. “I’m not sure anyone would believe me, even if we did tell.”

“Let’s not test that theory,” I said.

Once Hayden disappeared into the darkness, Evey stretched. “I’m going to bed.” Her voice was soft and very, very sad.

“’Night.” She let herself out of my room, shutting the door silently behind her.

Saxon bent down, pressing a chaste kiss to my forehead. “I’ll come see you tomorrow.”

“No, don’t go.” I pulled on his arm and scooted back on the bed. “Don’t leave just yet. I want to talk to you.”

With a reluctant smile, Saxon fell onto the bed next to me. The window stayed open all the way, and frigid wind snaked its way into the room. “I don’t think your parents would approve.”

I rolled my eyes. “Relax, Captain Chastity Belt. I’ll leave your virtue completely intact.”

He laughed and pulled my body against his, curling his legs around mine. The familiar cloud of warmth filled my body, and I released a long, blissful sigh. Nothing in the world could compare with a cuddle sesh with Saxon. When he spoke, his voice sounded ten times more relaxed now that he was communicating telepathically.

What do you want to talk about?

“Thank you.”

For what?

“For explaining everything to Hayden and Evey. It was getting really difficult to keep a secret from my sister. And Hayden…he just deserved to know what happened to Ian.”

It’s risky. If the Council finds out I’ve told three people, there will be serious—

“Consequences. I know.” I held him even tighter. “But still, Sax, you did the right thing.”

Thank you.
He paused for a spell.
Sometimes I don’t know what is right and what is wrong anymore.

“What do you mean?”

It’s just that I’ve spent so much of my time with humans. I understand them and respect them. Often times, I wish I were one. It feels disloyal to break Mer rules that have been in place for centuries simply to appease a human. The Council would frown on that.

Hope sparked like a lighter deep inside of me. “Have you ever considered staying with us? You know, in the human world permanently? Could you even do that?”