Unfinished Hero 02 Creed (17 page)

When she remained silent, I took my mind off my need for another smoke and stopped being that way.

“He wants to talk. Tell me why he left me all those years ago,” I shared.

“Okay,” she whispered.

“Doesn’t turn back the years,” I told her.

“You’re right.”

“Doesn’t erase what happened to me,” I carried on.

“You’re right about that, too.”

I pulled in breath through my nose and stared at my dark yard.

Gun came into the room and I knew that because she jumped up on my chair. Then she shoved her way into the space between my thighs and my torso, which was snug since I had my body twisted sideways in the chair and my feet in the seat. Still, when she wanted something, she was determined and she got it. So she got it, curled up and started purring.

I started stroking.

Then I started talking again.

“He has a scar on his cheekbone, a streak of white through his hair where the knife went through. He said they were going for his brain through his eye and he moved. He also said when he got it, it had something to do with him leaving me.”

“Why don’t you find out?” she asked cautiously.

“They could have tortured me back then and I’d never leave him. Obviously, they did something like that and he left me.”

“You’re guessing. My advice, honey, you shouldn’t guess. You should
know.
”

“Doesn’t turn back the years,” I muttered.

“You’re right, it doesn’t.”

“Doesn’t erase what happened to me.”

“You’re right, Sylvie,” she whispered.

I fell silent.

Then I again broke the silence.

“He named his kids with another woman the names we chose for ours.” I heard her sharply indrawn breath. “Yeah,” I agreed. “That’s about what I thought before I attacked him and tried to beat the shit out of him. That didn’t work.”

“Why would he do that?” she asked. “Did he explain?”

“Yup,” I answered. “Said it was because he thought he’d never see me again. Said it was because he wanted to call the kids he loved the names we chose so he could remember me every time he did it. Fucking whacked
and
mean. His wife found out, divorced his ass and, seriously, I do not blame her.”

She fell silent for long moments before she broke it.

“That’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard.”

My head turned to stare at her shadow.

“What?” I breathed.

I watched her shadow lean toward me.

“Okay, maybe you won’t like me after I tell you this but if something happened to Knight and he was taken from me, I love our daughter enough to go on with life even though, in all honesty, huge important parts of mine would be over. Going on with life maybe would include having someone else in it but I know this. There is no one for me but Knight. I’d be honest and if the guy didn’t get it, he’d have to move on, but that’s the way it would be. I’d do everything in my power in some way to keep Knight alive, not only for Kat but for me. I’d need it so I’d do it. This would mean there probably wouldn’t be anyone else for me. But what happened to you happened a long time ago, Sylvie, you were young, he was young. He was just trying to keep living at the same time keep you alive and with him in some way and, well, that’s beautiful. You’re right. It’s also whacked and mean. But anything can be a lot of things and it might be whacked and mean, but it’s beautiful, too.”

I looked back to the night.

“This doesn’t matter,” I said softly. “I can know what happened for him to leave me. Hell, maybe I could even understand. But it wouldn’t matter. I am who I am now. No going back.”

“There’s never any going back. But you’re not talking about that. You’re talking about not moving forward.”

I shook my head.

“You are, Sylvie,” Anya stated firmly. “You’re digging in and staying there. This isn’t about history. This is about what could be.”

“Even if he could explain shit, it’ll always be between us.”

“Only if you let it be.”

I laughed without humor.

“You’re scared,” she whispered and I turned my head back to her shadow.

“Fuck yeah,” I whispered back.

“He left and your life unraveled.”

“Yup.”

“You can’t do that again.”

“Nope.”

She sat back and again fell silent.

I looked back to the night.

We remained quiet a long time.

I broke it this time.

“I’m being a bad hostess. You want a drink?”

She stood. “Some other time, honey. I should get home to my family.”

Her family.

She was a lucky bitch. Fortunately, she knew it.

“You mind if I don’t see you out?” I asked.

There was a smile in her voice when she replied, “Not at all.”

“Thanks for stopping by, Anya. Tell Knight I’m cool. All systems go tomorrow.”

“I’ll tell him.”

I watched her walk to the darkened kitchen doorway as I stroked Gun.

Her shadow didn’t disappear through it. It stopped and I knew she was turning back to me.

“One last thing, Sylvie. When I leave, I want you to think about your life right now. I know you like it. I know you’ve got people close to you. I know you have fun. But I want you to think of your happiest memory, the happiest in your whole life. Then I want you to compare it to the life you live now without Tucker Creed. My guess, your happiest memory includes him. My guess, even with that shit between you, you give it a shot, you’ll go from the life you live now, that you like, to something else. Something bigger, richer, better,
happier.
And you know it. You’re just scared to lose it because you lost it once. Then, after all that, think about what your life would be if he was
never
in it. You’d never met. He’d never touched it. Then, honey, ask yourself how you would feel if you didn’t have those moments. Last, I hope you’ll come to the realization that, this time around, you’re making the deliberate choice not to take a chance in order to have that beauty.”

I stared at the shadowed door long after her silhouette left it but I didn’t see dark shadows. I saw sunny days, the lake, the pier, blankets over grass, young bodies rolling on them, tangled, twin beds in dark rooms that barely fit two bodies, whispered conversations, holding close.

My hands curled around Gun as my legs uncurled from the chair. I set my feet on the floor as I cuddled her close and walked through my dark house to my bedroom. I didn’t bother with a light. I just dropped Gun gently on my bed and dug through my clothes on the floor until I found my jeans from last night.

I dug my phone out of the back pocket.

I flipped it open and the light from the screen made me wince.

I went to my phonebook, scrolled down and hit go.

I put it to my ear as my eyes went to the clock on my nightstand.

It was one seventeen in the morning.

The phone rang once.

“Sylvie,” Creed greeted, sounding alert but growly.

“I’m ready,” I whispered.

Silence.

Then, “I’ll be there in ten.”

Disconnect.

I flipped my phone shut.

Fuck.

My Sylvie

A warm, late summer day in Kentucky, twenty-two years earlier, Creed is seventeen, Sylvie is eleven, one day away from being twelve…

I got off my bike, leaned it against the wall, walked down the side of the building, pulled open the door, walked into the frozen milk stand and saw him right away.

Creed with his girlfriend, Natalie.

My stomach started hurting.

I began to turn around real quick but he was laughing, his head moved and he caught sight of me.

“Hey, Sylvie.”

I gave a stupid wave then turned around and walked out the door.

But I ran to my bike.

I pulled it from the wall and started to get on when I heard, “Hey! Yo! Wait!”

I looked up and saw Creed’s long legs were bringing him to me.

He was
so
beautiful.

As he got closer, my head went back, back until he stopped in front of me.

“You not gettin’ any ice cream?” he asked.

I shook my head. “No. I forgot. I gotta get home. The stepmonster is taking me shopping for my birthday.”

This wasn’t totally a lie. She was supposed to. She just hadn’t got out of bed yet.

“Right,” he muttered then grinned. “We on for the lake tomorrow?”

No way. He’d probably want to bring Natalie.

I shook my head. “Sorry, I should have… I forgot to tell you. I’m going over to my friend’s house tomorrow. All day slumber party.”

His head jerked to the side and his voice was quiet when he reminded me, “We always meet at the lake for your birthday, Sylvie.”

“I’ll meet you the day after but I can’t stay long.”

“Come in the mornin’, before you go to your friend’s, just real quick,” he urged.

“I… I can’t. I’m going over there early.”

“Then I’ll meet you earlier.”

“I –”

“Creed! You gonna buy me a cone or what?”

He twisted around to look behind him and I leaned to the side to look around him. I saw Natalie outside the door, one hand holding it open, one hand on her hitched hip. Her long, tanned legs on show in her short-shorts. Her big boobs making the material of her tight t-shirt stretch.

“In a second,” Creed called back.

I was so intent on my study of the beautiful, tall, brunette Natalie and wishing I had brown hair and long legs and big boobs that I didn’t notice him turn back to me.

“Hey,” he said softly and my eyes shot to him.

Then I quickly dropped my head and moved closer to my bike, mumbling, “Gotta go.”

“Hey,” he said it softly again and, slowly, my eyes lifted to him. When my eyes met his beautiful blue ones, he whispered, “You’ll always be my girl.”

He was just being nice.

I’d stopped being his girl a couple years ago. He had other ones now. Lots of them. Natalie was just the newest one.

I bit my lip and looked away, trying real hard not to cry.

“Hey,” he whispered and I didn’t want to, I could see the wet swimming in my eyes but I pulled in a breath and looked back at him to find him closer and leaning down toward me. “You’ll always be my Sylvie. Yeah?”

I sucked in a breath and nodded.

“Come to the lake. I’ll meet you early,” he ordered.

I nodded again.

He grinned, lifted a hand and touched the green stone hanging at my neck.

“Gotta give my Sylvie her necklace.”

“Okay, Creed,” I whispered.

He pulled only an inch away but stopped and whispered, “It’s always you and me.”

I nodded again and felt my lips quivering.

He kept whispering, “Always me and my Sylvie, yeah?”

“Yeah,” I whispered back.

He lifted a hand and tucked my hair behind my ear. “Careful ridin’ home.”

“’Kay, Creed.”

“See you tomorrow.”

“’Kay.”

“Later.”

“Bye.”

I got on my bike.

He strode back to the frozen milk stand.

I cried all the way home.

We Win

Present day…

“Sylvie?”

I stood completely still, the roaring in my ears deafening, my eyes opened but blinded, every nerve in my body vibrating like I was receiving way too many volts but my lips moved.

“Stop talking.”

“Baby.” I felt two big hands settle gently on either side of my head.

“They didn’t do that to you,” I whispered.

“Sylvie –”

“Take it back.”

“Ba –”

My hands shot straight down in fists, my head jerked back so far pain pulled at my neck and the words carved jagged through my throat as I shrieked, “
They did not do that to you!
”

His arms folded around my head as he yanked me to his body.

“We’re done for tonight,” he muttered into the top of my hair.

Oh God.

That wasn’t it.

Oh God.

There was more.

My legs gave out under me but Creed caught me, lifting me up in his arms. I shoved my face in his neck as we moved through my house. Then we were in bed, Creed gathering me close, tucking me tight, curling over me so he was mostly on me. He was the only thing there was, the only thing I could see, the only thing I could feel.

“They didn’t do that to you,” I whispered into his throat but it was a ragged plea.

“Quiet, Sylvie.”

My body bucked violently as the sob tore through me.

Creed’s hold tightened.

My fingers fisted in his shirt.

“They didn’t do that to you. They didn’t do that to you. They didn’t do that to you. They didn’t do that to you. They didn’t do that to you. They didn’t do that to you.”

“Sh, baby.”

I shushed.

He held me.

My tears quieted.

He still held me.

“Creed?” I called.

“Sleep, baby.”

“Do you believe in God?”

“Sleep.”

“Do you believe in God?”

“I don’t know.”

I sucked in a broken breath.

Then I whispered, “Right now, I don’t either.”

* * * * *

My eyes opened and I stared at the alarm clock.

Then I threw the covers back from the bed, jumped up, rushed out of my room, down the hall and through the living room. I smelled bacon cooking so instead of going right out the door, I ran into the dining room and stopped dead halfway in.

Creed was at my stove. He felt my presence and turned.

“Charlene,” I whispered.

“I went over. It’s all good. She’s cool. Helped with the kids.”

I spared at him and started trembling, head to toe shakes.

He didn’t miss it.

“Come here, Sylvie.”

“I need time.„

His haad jerked then his eyes locked on me.

Ca5tiously, he replied, “Honest to Chriqt, give you aNything. Anything, baby. But lost enough time. Can’t give you that. Space, maybe. Time. No.”

I shook my head. “No, I mean… I need time befora you tell me the rest.”

He closed his eyes. He did this slowl9.

Then he opened them and whispered, “That, I can give.”

I took off runnhng, right at him, direct. I hit kitchen tile, turned and launched myself through the air.