Unforgiving Temper (43 page)

This further evidence of a possible
understanding between them sent a devastating wave of loss through
him. He could not bear to imagine that she was already promised to
a man like Grissholm! While there was any hope at all that she was
not yet engaged, he stubbornly refused to give way.

“Miss Bennet?”

“I am sorry, but Lord Grissholm is
correct. My time is not my own at present. We shall have to
postpone our conversation until more favorable circumstances
present themselves.”

“May I enquire when I might have that
privilege?” Darcy probed cautiously. Her manner was too contrived,
too restrained; something was not right.

“As much as I would like, I really cannot
say. It is rather complicated.”

Her slightly nervous smile, given under
Grissholm's smug, watchful eye only served to deepen Darcy's
suspicions.

“Very well, I shall wait for another time
then.” Darcy tipped his hat in parting, issuing an unspoken
challenge as he met Grissholm's arrogant gaze. “But I should not be
surprised, Miss Bennet, if we happen to meet again – very
soon.”

Elizabeth gazed intently across the expanse
of Lord Grissholm's desk, looking at him as if he had no sense
at all.

“It is the twentieth of September! It is long
past the time when I should have received a letter from
Mr. Wickham. I do not trust him, and if he is scheming again,
I do not think I could bear to have any more delays.”

“Do not make yourself uneasy,” the viscount
answered with a placating smile. “It is most likely my negotiations
with him have only altered his schedule a bit – and I believe he is
wise enough to know it would be a grave mistake to cross me.”

She thought about that for a moment, studying
his confident expression.

“You may be right,” she agreed grudgingly,
“but if that is the case, he should have informed me of such
instead of leaving me to worry like this.”

“In another week or so it will not
matter.”

“I suppose not. It is just that with the end
to this nightmare so near, it is difficult to have any degree of
patience.”

“Nightmare? An interesting choice of words. I
was rather hoping you had not found the entire experience
unpleasant. That perhaps you have found some things to appreciate?”
His brow rose expressively. “I know I have.”

Elizabeth sat unmoving, caught in the
intensity of his look, then dropped her eyes to study the intricate
weave of the lace on her gown.

“Sir, I very much appreciate all you have
done for me. Indeed, it has not been entirely unpleasant, however
you must see that the manner in which Mr. Wickham has
separated me from my family is a misery of the acutest kind. Except
for your kindness and Rebecca's sweet temper, which eases the pain
of separation from my own sisters, these past months have been
nearly impossible to bear.”

She felt the viscount's powerful gaze linger
a few moments more before he rose abruptly from his chair. Without
turning to look, she followed the sound of his progress around the
room as he straightened an alabaster bust, slowly rotated the
enameled globe in its mounting, then picked up a book and leafed
through its pages before returning it to the stack. When he moved
to the hearth where he paused to straighten a candlestick, she
could see him out of the corner of her eye. Nervously, she watched
him nod in a manner that seemed to mark the end of a silent
deliberation. Then he spoke. Although his voice was low, it was
filled with a quiet passion.

“And yet, some say our greatest trials give
way to our greatest joys.”

Elizabeth caught his meaning immediately and
her heart beat wildly. The calm, steady expression on her face said
nothing of the sudden apprehension of what she knew was coming. The
moment Rebecca had predicted, the moment she herself had dared to
consider, was now upon her.

Unable to respond to his words, Elizabeth
continued in the examination of her lace and waited. Her heart
accelerated in tandem with his renewed wandering that soon came to
a stop at the side of her chair. Only the sound of her one quick
breath broke the silence as he reached down and took her hands in
his, slowly raising her up to stand before him.

“Do you not think so?”

Elizabeth forced herself to breathe, her
senses constricted by his nearness and the feel of his eyes upon
her. She knew he waited for a response, but she could not bring
herself to comply.

Grissholm touched her face, lightly tracing
the line of her cheek down to her chin and gently forced her face
up so that she would meet his eyes.

“Miss Bennet – Elizabeth – this business
with Wickham will soon be over and you will be at liberty to return
to your family, but I hope the separation will not be long. It is
my wish that we should part with an understanding between us. Is
that possible? Will you promise to return and be my wife?”

“My lord – ” Elizabeth swallowed nervously,
vainly trying to relieve the dryness in her mouth, and she turned
away from his gaze to better think of the words she wanted to say.
“I thank you for the honor of your proposal. Indeed, your
declaration does not come as a complete surprise as I have felt
your attentions were more than simply that of an employer for some
time now.” She allowed him a small, nervous smile. “I am favorably
inclined to the proposal; however, I would ask for a little time
before I give you my answer. I should very much like to see my
father first. I should like to have his consent.”

“There has been no word of any improvement in
your father. I doubt he is in any condition that would allow you to
converse with him. Perhaps an application to your uncle here in
London would suffice?”

“No, that will not do. An engagement is too
great a matter to circumvent my father. There has always been a
special bond between us and I cannot take so solemn a step without
his knowledge. Even if he is not entirely well, I must see him…tell
him myself. I am certain if I were at Longbourn he would find a way
to give me his blessing.”

“You know that is not possible until your
sister's letters have been recovered. We cannot give Wickham that
advantage. If your father cares for you as you say, he would
understand.”

“It is not a matter of understanding. I will
not risk further injury to his fragile state of health by engaging
myself without his knowledge or consent. I must see him before
anything can be acknowledged.”

“I suppose if that is your wish, I shall have
to abide by it for now.” His impatient frown quickly smoothed into
a strained smile. “But I shall hope that you will consider the
matter more carefully and allow the engagement to be announced. In
the meantime, I shall see what I can do to encourage Wickham to a
speedy settlement.”

“Thank you, sir,” Elizabeth smiled softly, “I
know it is a great deal to ask, but I cannot think you would wish
me to begin married life without the assurance of my father's
blessing.”

“Well – I shall not detain you any longer. I
have business to attend to, not the least of which is a letter to
Mr. Wickham, and I am sure you have some suitable endeavor to
occupy your time this afternoon.”

Elizabeth smiled again, this time with a
sense of gratitude and relief. She had been spared the necessity of
having to accept immediately. Blushing as he softly kissed her
hand, she left the study more than a little unsettled and made her
way to the small garden attached to the rear of the house. The
weather was still quite cold, but the icy air felt good against her
heated cheeks. It was some time before the cold began to settle in
and she was ready to face Rebecca. Entering the house again, she
turned her steps toward the south drawing room where she knew she
would find the girl.

In short order the main points of what had
transpired with Lord Grissholm were related.

“Oh, Elizabeth, did I not tell you?! And now
it has happened!” Rebecca stared at Elizabeth in sudden awe. “I am
so happy for you, but I cannot imagine being married to a man like
Lord Grissholm. He frightens me so just to talk to him, and to
think of being on equal terms is beyond my comprehension!”

“Equal terms – as you put it – can mean many
things, my dear,” Elizabeth replied softly.

“Yes, but what I meant was, well, his
lordship is so – exacting in his manner, and you have such a
natural liveliness; I know there is much you cannot express in your
current position. When you are married, you shall be at liberty to
express yourself more freely.”

“In most cases, marriage does not bring as
much liberty as you imagine. Lord Grissholm is a man with
great responsibilities and is restricted in many ways by the
dictates of his position. I suppose it will be much the same for
me.”

“Are you apprehensive at becoming Lady
Grissholm? It seems like such an overwhelming thing to do.”

“Perhaps is may seem so,” Elizabeth answered
with optimism, “but in time I believe we shall be happily settled.
As Lady Grissholm, there is much good I can do; and with my father
so ill, it is an advantageous match for my family as well.”

“It is just…I thought…Well, from all that you
have ever said on the subject I think you would desire a greater
understanding with the man you marry.”

“And you do not think I will find this with
his lordship?”

“In many respects, yes, but so often there is
something in his manner that hints of an implacable pride,
especially when you are in disagreement with him.”

“In my experience, it is a common fault among
all men.”

“Perhaps it is,” Rebecca grinned at her
frankness, “but I should like to find a man less so. The fault is
much greater in some than others, is it not?”

“Yes, I daresay it is; but we must own when
it comes to an agreeable marriage that there has to be more than
one man in the world suited to make us content. It is bewitching to
think that there is one alone upon whom our happiness depends.
Surely, where there is desire on both sides, any good woman and any
good man can enjoy a successful union.”

“And you shall be happy then?” Rebecca asked
anxiously.

Elizabeth took Rebecca's hands into her own
and smiled warmly. “Yes, I believe so. I suppose we shall be as
happy as any married couple. Why should we not?”

She could see from the girl's expression that
her answer was not entirely satisfactory.

“Rebecca, your concern is understandable. For
many years, you have only seen a harsh, distant demeanor in
Lord Grissholm; but have not these past few months shown him
capable of a more benevolent temper? It is my belief that with time
he will prove to be a much better man than either of us ever
thought possible.”

“There has been a difference since you came,
Elizabeth. With someone as good as you, it could not be
otherwise!”

“On that kind note I think I shall leave you
to your book. There is much to be done before any wedding date can
be set!”

* * * *

“Thank you for coming, Miss Bennet,”
Darcy's greeting carried a hint of relief. “I feared you might not.
The manner of my request was somewhat unconventional.”

She smiled at him. “Yes, Mr. Darcy. I
was rather surprised when my maid delivered your message; however,
it was not unwelcome. Our last conversation has been on my mind a
great deal, and as Lord Grissholm's objections were evident, I
did not think we would finish it anytime soon. His opinion is quite
set against you and my situation in the household makes it
difficult to oppose his wishes.”

“Yes, the viscount has made his position very
clear. I am not welcomed at Peyton House, so it is fortunate for me
that you have a fondness for walking.”

Elizabeth raised her brows knowingly, giving
him a wry smile. “His lordship does not think it coincidence that
we should meet in Cumberland and again here in London so soon after
– nor do I. In any case, he would be immensely displeased if he
knew the purpose of my walk today.”

“And yet, you came.”

He paused, and she glimpsed a spark of
pleasure in his eyes. The moment was fleeting, but it was enough
for her to wonder at the nebulous feeling it had stirred in her.
Darcy gestured an invitation to proceed with a sweep of his arm,
drawing her attention back to the matter at hand. She fell into
step beside him as he turned and began walking deeper into the
park.

“Knowing the viscount's resentment toward me,
I thought it best to be as discreet as possible. I do not wish to
make things difficult for you.”

“You need not worry, Mr. Darcy. His
lordship has gone out for the afternoon – this is his day for
White's; and Rebecca is keeping to her rooms with a bad cold. I
doubt I will even be missed.”

After only a brief pause, Elizabeth turned
the conversation to the question that was foremost on her mind.

“I do not pretend to understand the
difficulties between Lord Grissholm and yourself, but the
dislike is evident, on both sides. I am afraid his lordship's
observations after our last meeting were not very flattering.”

“I can imagine they were not. Whatever was
said, I beg you do not accept it as a matter of fact.”

“Oh, I do not, I assure you!” she answered
quickly, displaying a small rueful smile. “The last time I failed
to consider both sides of a disagreement between two gentlemen, I
deeply regretted it. I am resolved not to make that mistake
again.”

“I am very glad to hear that,” he murmured
with a smile of his own.

“Yes, I thought it wise to gather all the
facts before forming an opinion. I should like to know your side of
this disagreement – if you are willing to tell me.”

Darcy let out a small sigh. It was obviously
not something he wished to speak of. For a moment, Elizabeth
thought he would refuse, and then he began.