Authors: Erica Chilson
“Hey, no! Knock it the fuck off
! We need to be able to think. I don’t know what Ray wants, but we know he won’t hurt Ava. He never touched you, right?”
“No, Ray
didn’t touch me, Katya,” Ezra whimpers. “But that isn’t the point. He made me watch him rape prostitutes. He made me rape my best friend. I mean rape- rape Aaron. You can use your imagination on that one. He was barely fifteen and weighed a little over a hundred pounds. I was a grown damn man.” His voice escalates as he recites Ray’s list of crimes.
“I’m sorry, Ezra, I re
ally am. But that is not what I’m getting at. I meant to say that Ray will not physically or sexually abuse Ava. He possibly stills sees her as a child. You, he was trying to create in his image. He was obsessed with having a bloodline. He won’t harm the only grandchild he has. I know he could do worse to her. I just feel deep down that she is safe from his perversions. I don’t think you should talk to him. I’m just saying you need to calm down, take a deep breath, and realize we’re all sitting in this apartment right now. You can see us. We are fine for the moment. You didn’t fail your family.”
“What ar
e we going to do?” I hate how Ezra’s voice sounds hopeless. I look to Cortez as he sits quietly contemplating.
“We need to figure
out who Ray’s accomplice is. We’re safe from Ray. He talked to Ava in a crowded public place. I don’t think he wants to take her. He really wanted you to have that message. I’ve been thinking. I’m not sure the notes are coming from Ray. That isn’t his style. Yes, it was what he said to you. But anyone who could circumvent five notifications for the parole hearing could possibly have access to the trial transcripts. I don’t know if they are working together or they wanted Ray out hoping he’d fuck with us. It’s connected, but I don’t know if the stalker is truly connected to Ray. It just isn’t his style. He always worked alone. The movie theater is exactly how Ray would approach this. I don’t know if I’m overthinking it or under-thinking it.” Cort looks at us so sincerely that I want to tear up.
“We go about
our lives, but be extra vigilant. This was a wakeup call. I wondered why there is such a large amount of time between notes. I think it is to give us a semblance of normalcy, so that we are always waiting, never at peace,” I muse.
“The first note came before Ray was released,”
Cort drops the bombshell. “I just don’t think that Ray is connected to the note writer. I really think they are using him to fuck with us. I just hope that Ray doesn’t figure it out. No, actually, I do. He would take care of them for us.” Cortez gives a bitter laugh. “Then we’d only have to worry about Ray.”
“I hate this, this feeling of helplessness. There is really nothing we can do until we figure out who is helping him.” I groan into my hands. I have the urge to pou
nd my forehead into the table.
“
You feel helpless. I am the leader of this family, and I can’t do a thing about it. Not a damned thing.” Ezra growls at me.
“Hey, guys, this is the whole point. Whoever it is wants us to fight amongst ourselves so that we don’t see them coming. We have good things going on right now. We have each other to lean on. We have Ava and Katya completing our family. Aaron is healed
and moving on with Kayla. We will not let this fucktard ruin our happy life. If we allow it, they win. So don’t act like this is a competition for who has it worse, Ezra. Katya has every right to feel helpless just as you do. It’s not either or. Hell, I even feel helpless.”
“You’re right, Cort, you’re right. Accept my apology, Katya. I’m sorry.” Ezra leans over and kisses my forehead.
I hear the click of the lock on the office door and peer down the hall towards the sound. Aaron sticks his head out of the doorway to see if it’s clear to come out. I shake my head yes and the three of them wander back to the table.
“The food should be here shortly. We just ordered some
calzones and wings.” Aaron says with a shrug.
Ava looks skit
tish. I quickly look between Ava and her father, trying to give Ezra the hint to comfort her. He smiles and stands up. “So, Ava, do you think we have enough favors for tomorrow’s party or do we need to make some more?” Ezra pulls Ava into his side and half hugs her while they look at the mess on the table. He kisses her on the top of the head and closes his eyes. I see a look of pure terror flash over Ezra’s face before he masks it. Cortez reaches over for my hand, letting me know he saw it too. I guess Cort and I are on
protect
Ezra from himself
duty again.
The door
bell rings, signaling the arrival of our food just as we’re clearing the table free of party favors. We sit in strained silence until Aaron makes it his mission to get everyone talking. I can tell that Aaron feels responsible for Ray talking to Ava. It is and isn’t his fault. But I know it weighs heavily on his mind. Ezra’s chastisement didn’t help matters. I try to add to the conversation to lighten the mood, but my forced enthusiasm is obvious. The conversation actually flows better when I keep my mouth shut.
“Ma, do you wanna play a game tonight?”
“Sure,” I say as I plaster a fake smile on my face. I figure out that I’m not fooling anyone when Aaron cringes. Great! “What would you like to play?”
“We only have two games here, but I could run out and buy something,”
Ezra says, hoping he can do something for me.
“What are the choices?” This time my small smile is genuine.
“We have chess-” I burst out laughing just as Ezra had hoped. “No… no, chess isn’t a good idea. How about Risk? There are six of us. It would be perfect.”
“Risk it is!” I stand up and start to clear off the table while Ezra runs off to collect the game.
“I want Dad as my partner,” Ava excitedly exclaims.
“You don’t have partners, allies, b
ut never partners,” I explain.
“Why not?”
She grumbles.
“There are three types of players: Those who play to win. Kamikazes who sacrifice themselves for ano
ther player. They are the worst, unpredictable and attack for no reason other than to mess up your game. Lastly, the crazy who doesn’t know how to play, and there is always someone who doesn’t. Sorry, baby girl, you are designated crazy tonight.”
“
What kind are you?” Curiosity is strong in Ava’s voice.
“
Oh, I play to win- always have, always will.” I received a wink from Cortez for that comment.
An hour into the game
, Ava realizes why the game is only fun for those who play to win or create chaos, or those who truly are crazy. I feel bad as I roll to remove Ava’s last piece. Yeah, I’m a bad Mama for knocking my own daughter out of the game. “Sorry about that, now I want you to watch and learn how the game is really played.”
Five minutes later Ava’s
chirps, “Aaron and Kayla are kamikazes aren’t they?”
“Yeah,” I chu
ckle out. “But whose are they?”
“I don’t
know,” she says in confusion.
“Just watch, you’ll see.
” I flash a grin.
“Hey, that’s not fair, D
ad!” It didn’t take Ava long to notice they never rolled against the Boss. She punches her father in the arm and he snickers at her. “How come you get both of them?”
“Just because I’
m that special, little one, watch and learn, and I will give you the keys to the kingdom.” Ezra smiles at me, causing me to blush.
“Don’t you care, Cort?” Ava asks.
“Nah- Ezra doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of winning. He’s stuck in Europe.”
“You’re mom’s ally aren’t you?”
“Of course, if we had fought each other, your dad would’ve won.” Cort turns to Ezra, “You should have figured out that Kat was smarter than that,” he chastises.
A half-
hour later, Ezra loses his helpers. I hear a giggle trail in from the living room, a giggle I know well. Aaron is exciting Kayla.
“The game doesn’t change much from this point on. It will be back and forth. You may want to go entertain yourself or die of boredom sit
ting here,” Cortez says to Ava. The second Ava leaves the room, Cortez produces a bottle of rum- the 151 proof kind that drops your ass in five seconds flat.
“I think we need to make this more interesting, don’t you?”
Cort grins and tips the bottle in my direction.
“Oh, fuck no!” I cringe at the thought.
“Don’t be a pussy, at least have a chug,” Cortez teases.
“Hey, I’m winning. You’re just trying to compromise me. I know Aaron told you it
only takes a sip and I’m fucked up. Could you possibly find a stronger drink for Christ’s sake?” My eyes bug-out at the bottle of rum strong enough to be rubbing alcohol.
Cort
plunks the bottle in front of me and smirks. I unscrew the cap- challenge accepted- and down a mouthful. I sputter as the fiery liquid hits the back of my throat. My nostrils burn from the toxic vapors coming off the liquor.
“Ha! I kne
w you couldn’t pass a challenge,” Cort taunts me, and I scrunch my face up at him.
“Ya know what this drink needs?” I take another mouthful
and hiss. “We need some music.” I lift to take another drink, fully invested in getting plastered. A hand grabs it out of my grasp. I scowl at Ezra as he opens his mouth and pours a stream down his throat.
“Damn, you must
have owned drinking games like a boss at the frat house in college,” I say in appreciation.
I’
m hypnotized by sight of Ezra’s throat as he swallows the liquid down. I want to lick his neck, slurp it, bite him, and mark it as mine. I’m so enthralled that I meep when the music pounds into the room. I snatch the bottle back and chug before Ezra can reclaim it.
“Mine,” I say not sure
if I mean the bottle or Ezra.
“No, mine,” Cortez says as he snatches it
and takes a chug. “Your turn Ezra, let’s get this bitch finished. We have other games to play.”
“I forfeit,” Ezra says as he pushes h
imself from the table.
“Hey, now, I wanna know who wins,” I w
hine.
“Hmm… Yeah, I forfeit
, too.” Cortez takes my hand and wraps it around the neck of the bottle. He squeezes to make sure that I have a good hold. I’m already experiencing the effects of the rum. My cheeks feel like they are numb and on fire. My eyes feel like they are floating- bubbly-eyed.
“
Bedroom,” Ezra says to Cortez. “The little one has access to the rest of the house. Plus, we need toys.” Ezra releases a masculine laugh I’ve never heard from him. It’s husky, smoky, and rough, and it tightens things low in my belly.
Cortez’s hand reappears before I drop the bottle. He smirks at me for
reacting to Ezra the way I do. “One more guzzle, Kitten, make it worth your time.” I obey by drinking a lot more than I thought possible, letting me know that I’m way past the point of no return.
“Take Kitty Kat
to our room. I’ll be there in a minute. I have to check on Ava,” Ezra says as he moves through the room.
“You’re trying to take advantage of me, aren’t you?”
I slur.
“Of cou
rse we are,” Cortez says matter-of-factly. “Do you really care, Kitten?”
“Nah…
right now I guess I don’t.” I think for a moment or longer, I’m not sure of time at this point. “But, will I regret it tomorrow?”
“Knowing you- undoubtedly.
But we both know you want to make love to us, and all you have to do is take your boundaries down. Admit it to yourself, and then to us. Tomorrow you can blame it on the rum. We’ll let you.” I allow Cort to lead me to our room. I take one last pull from the bottle. I’m committed to this, bad idea that it may be. I want it more than anything. I can at least admit that to myself.
“One more for me and the bottle is kicked,” Ezra says as he reaches for the bottle. I watch him swallow again and lose my balance. I end up
with my ass planted on the floor, laughing hysterically.
Big hands hook under my arms and toss me on the bed. “Katya, tell us
what you want,” Ezra commands.
“Who’s asking, Master Ez or Ezra,” I say to him.
“We’re one in the same,” Ezra explains for the billionth time. “What do you want?”
“Both of you,” I
simply answer.
“Why won’t you make love to us witho
ut liquid courage?” Ezra asks as he pulls me flat on my back.
“No, I’m not answering that,
” I belligerently say.
“Hmm… that sounds an awful lot like disobedience.” My cuffs materialize from Ezra’s
pocket, and my eyes widen at the sight. Shit!
“Where-” I lick my suddenly dry lips. “Where did you get those?”
“I snatched these from your jewelry box.” Ezra dangles the cuffs from their attached metal rings- taunting me.
“I don’t want those.” My voice comes out breathy. I said I didn’t want them
, but my body screams
Hell, Y E S!
Shit.