Unspoken Love (10 page)

The day’s events had taken their toll on Thomas. “I, too, shall retire,” he announced.

“I’ll see you to bed,” Jenny offered, rising from the sofa, wishing to delay going to her own room.

Molly sprang to her feet. “I’ll take care of Thomas. You need your rest, Jenny.”

Finding no graceful way out of prolonging her time with Nicholas, Jenny planted a kiss upon her father’s brow. “See you in the morning, Father.”

Nicholas, too, bade Molly and Thomas goodnight, then followed Jenny to their chamber.

Jenny remained silent as she searched her grip and pulled out a nightgown. She prepared to put it on, then stopped abruptly. In her haste to leave
Small Timbers
, she had grabbed the revealing negligee that Thelma had given her for her wedding. She had little choice but to wear it since she had no other sleeping apparel with her. She struggled with the buttons on her riding habit.

“Let me help you,” Nicholas said. Deftly, he freed the catches and started to assist her out of her clothes.

Jenny drew back. “I am capable of undressing myself.”

“Suit yourself,” he said and shed his garments. Slipping his unclad body between the sheets, he fixed his eyes on Jenny.

Jenny gulped with embarrassment. “You didn’t bring a nightshirt?”

“No, Jenny. I don’t sleep in them, remember.”

Jenny turned her back to him. She dropped her clothes to the floor and slipped into her nightgown. Extinguishing the light, she crept into bed. Nicholas reached out and drew her into his embrace, his musky scent surrounding her.

“What are you doing?” Jenny whispered. “Just because we share the same bed doesn’t give you other rights!”

Nicholas sent her a devilish grin and arched his brow seductively. His eyes burned with passion, and he winked at her. He smothered her with kisses, then raised her nightgown and straddled her. He ran his tongue enticingly over her taut breast and sensuously massaged her body.

Jenny made a feeble attempt to ignore the fire consuming her. “Let me go!” she moaned, yet she knew in her heart that she wanted to stay in his embrace.

“I feel the passion in you,” Nicholas murmured, his warm breath caressing her earlobe. He covered her body and penetrated her. He moved slowly, then picked up momentum.

Jenny moaned, inwardly crying out for fulfillment. Wrapping her arms around his robust frame, she accepted him. Driven with desire, she responded passionately and felt her body swept away with ecstasy.

Nicholas kissed her fervently, and breathless, he lay over her.

“You have given me pleasure beyond my imagination,” he whispered.

Jenny lay beneath Nicholas, her thoughts in turmoil. She had experienced a new and wonderful feeling and felt truly fulfilled at last. Even now, his masculine physique played havoc with her senses, but she kept her feelings tucked inside. Besides, she was afraid he might gloat over his conquest. She didn’t want the moment to end, but to cover her weakness, she snapped, “Please move from me and allow me to breathe.”

Slowly, Nicholas withdrew from her voluptuous form. “I should have known it was too good to last,” he replied harshly. “You have a viper’s tongue, Jenny. Goodnight.” He rolled onto his side.

Sleep didn’t come so easily for Jennifer as thoughts of Nicholas churned in her head. His stinging words still echoed in her mind. She wondered why she felt hurt by his words.
Do I really want to please him? Why do I act like I need his approval? He married me to further his own means.
Worse, she felt betrayed by her own body, for only moments into his seduction she had encouraged him to make love to her. Thoroughly confused, she was angry with Nicholas, yet she wanted him.
How ludicrous!
she thought, attempting to gain control of her emotions.

Much later into the night, Jenny slept. Dreaming of his embrace, she molded herself against his frame.

Nicholas awakened to her warm skin touching his flesh. He knew there was now much more between the two of them than a legal document. He would have been drawn to her under any circumstances. Forcing her into marriage was his way of holding onto her. Perhaps it was good that she was expecting his child. Suddenly he felt proud and wished life was better between them. Yet, he wasn’t sure how to go about correcting the pain he had caused. He knew Jenny resented him for coercing her into marriage and, now, motherhood. Because of her misgivings, he couldn’t bring himself to lay open his feelings. He cared for Jenny and wanted her to remain his wife but wondered how he could convince her. She was sure to question his motives if he changed them in midstream. Most likely, she would think his only interest was in bringing an heir into the world.

As the moonlight shone into the room, he gazed down at Jenny’s sleeping form. He recalled the compassion she felt for others where fate had put them together. If she hadn’t been helping the desolate from the ravages of the storm, she wouldn’t have been in Greenville. Yet, because of that night when she innocently came to his room, he had married her. Now they were bound in more than matrimony. He also realized why he had gone to the study to meditate the nights away. He craved Jenny’s love and couldn’t stand the coldness she showed toward him. He had only himself to blame for his unhappy predicament, but somehow he must win Jenny over. He couldn’t stand to give her up now, and only with the passing of time, could he assuage her troubled heart and win her love.
How long will it take to win her heart
? he pondered.

Chapter 10

Early the next morning Jenny and Nicholas prepared to leave. As they stepped outside, William came from the barn. His blue eyes danced. “I brought your horses,” he said, holding the reins tightly. He gave Nicholas a cordial nod. His maturing face beamed at Jenny, and he broke into a wide grin, exposing crooked teeth. “It’s so good to see you, Mrs. Grant.”

“It is good to see you too, William. You’re doing a fine job for Father. Please keep up the good work.”

William stood attentive and expanded his chest proudly from the compliment. “I’ve watched you grow from a babe to a charming young woman,” he said fondly. “In all the years I’ve known you, you’ve never had an unkind word for me, and I thank you for that.”

Jenny sent him a brilliant smile. “Why, William, are you going soft on me?” she teased.

“No, Ma’am. I ain’t. But we sure do miss you around here. It just ain’t the same without you.”

Nicholas listened to the exchange between them and realized he had one more reason to feel guilty for taking Jenny away. This was her home, and she loved the people here.

William glanced at the sky. “The weather will be nice for your journey home.” As he spoke, the sun came from behind the clouds, and a soft breeze stirred the air.

Molly and Thomas stepped outside as Nicholas attached Jenny’s valise to Dexter’s saddle.

“Jenny, you brought a lot of clothes for just one night,” Molly chuckled.

Jenny searched for an answer to Molly’s comment. “I—I—” she stammered.

“She couldn’t decide what to wear,” Nicholas interrupted. “You know how changeable an expectant mother can be. I, on the other hand, brought none.”

Jenny sent him a grateful glance for helping her out of a delicate situation.

Molly broke out with laughter. “That’s a fine explanation, Nicholas. Do come back and visit us soon. It’s been wonderful seeing you both, and remember—I’ll see you at my wedding in two months’ time.”

“We’ll be there,” Jenny replied. She hugged father and kissed him farewell. “Take care of yourself.”

Thomas hid the lump forming in his throat. “I will. I’m not leaving this world yet,” he responded. He watched Jenny and Nicholas mount, then ride down the lane as gentle thoughts filled his mind.

Jenny stole glances at Nicholas as they rode home in silence. Her life had been turned upside down since she had met him. Broad shouldered, he rode erect in the saddle, his long muscular legs appealing to her senses. His raven hair gently blew in the breeze. As she took in his handsome profile, her heart skipped a beat, and she relived the intimacy they had shared the night before. She had responded with passion as he placed her under his fiery touch. She tore her gaze away from him.
This is ridiculous!
I am acting like a schoolgirl swooning over him.
She had vowed to leave him at the end of the year. Each day that passed brought them closer to the end of that time.
What explanation can I give Father when I come home alone with a baby?

They entered
Small Timbers
, and Nicholas veered toward the fields. “I must find Warren and tend to the plantation. I’ll see you at the house for dinner.”

Jenny nodded to him, then rode to the barn and dropped off Daisy. With valise in hand, she went to her room and unpacked. Suddenly, she doubled over in pain and felt a sticky substance between her legs. Blood seeped through her garments, and she removed them at once. She tended to herself, then slipped into a robe and lay down on the bed. Her cramps subsided as swiftly as they came, but as a precaution, she stayed in bed until it was time to cook dinner for Nicholas.

Jenny was still bleeding when she woke up the next morning. She didn’t tell Nicholas of her discomfort but waited until he was away from the house, then went to the stables and asked Billy to saddle Daisy.

Billy was quick to oblige and brought Daisy outside. “Here you are, Jenny,” he announced. “You be careful riding.”

Jenny smiled at Billy’s kind ways. “I will,” she answered genially. Unchaperoned, she rode the long trip to Greenville.

Going straight to Doc Jones’ house, she tethered Daisy and entered through the door that led to his office. She took a seat on the bench to await her turn and gazed about the room, her nerves frayed. A patient left the office, and Doc Jones stuck his head into the waiting room.

“Next,” he called and waited for her to enter. “What brings you here, Jenny? You look healthy to me.”

Normally, Jenny was not at a loss for words, but when she opened her mouth to speak, she looked away in embarrassment. “I—I—” she stammered.

With his usual sensitivity, Doc Jones soon put her at ease. “Are you having female problems, Jenny?”

In a tiny mirror hanging on the wall, Jenny saw her face turn crimson. Groping for the right words, she managed to explain her dilemma and concluded by asking, “Am I losing the baby, Doc?”

Doc Jones helped her onto the examining table and carefully examined her. “Jenny, I don’t mean to alarm you, but you are not pregnant.”

“Not pregnant? But I must be! I skipped my monthly until yesterday, and I was physically ill.”

“Be that as it may, Jenny, but you are having a normal menstruation. Clearly, you had a false pregnancy.” Thoughtfully, he studied her. “You’re under stress. You’ve been married less than a year, and your father has had serious health problems. These conditions could have disrupted your cycle.”

The doctor’s diagnosis hammered in her ears.
You are not pregnant.
“I feel so foolish to assume that I was pregnant.”

“I see the disappointment in your eyes,” Doc Jones said. “I’m sorry, Jenny, but this is not uncommon. Could it be that you and Nicholas are trying too hard?”

At the mention of Nicholas, she pondered his reaction.
Will he be relieved
? He would no longer be hindered from sending her on her way once the contract had been fulfilled. She felt a pang of regret, and her heart twisted with sorrow for, though Nicholas didn’t want a baby, she now knew that she did.

Doc Jones placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, his eyes softening. “Don’t be disheartened, Jenny. They’ll be plenty of time for babies.”

Jenny’s eyes clouded with tears. “How do I explain this to Father? He was elated at the news and will be devastated.”

“I’ll be paying him a visit soon, Jenny. I can break the news to him then, if you like.”

“And Molly?”

“I’ll speak with Molly, too.”

“Thank you, Doctor Jones, I do so appreciate it. By the time I see Father again, he will have accepted the news. Perhaps then I can explain in detail how I misunderstood my symptoms.”

The kind doctor reached into his medicine cabinet and brought out a small bottle of crushed ginger. He handed the herb to her. “Steep this in water to make tea and drink several cups throughout the day. It’ll soothe your cramps and calm your stomach.”

Jenny slipped the herb into her pocket and strolled from his office, heavy emotions weighing on her mind. Normally, she would have stopped by Aunt Thelma’s, but her heart wasn’t in it today. Mounting Daisy, she started for
Small Timbers
. She was halfway to the plantation when Nicholas thundered toward her.

“Where have you been, Jenny? I’ve been searching the countryside for you. How dare you ride unchaperoned in your condition?”

“There is no condition,” she said bleakly.

Nicholas eyed her sharply.

“What do you mean, Jenny? Are you or are you not expecting?”

“No, Nicholas, I am not with child. Doc Jones claims I had a false pregnancy, possibly brought on by horrendous stress.”

Nicholas digested the news. Disappointment crossed his features. Sympathetic to her sadness, he said, “I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything, Nicholas. I realize you didn’t want the responsibility of being a father.”

“That’s not true, Jenny. Perhaps at first I had doubts, but before the day was over, I was rejoicing in my heart.”

“Let’s not speak of this again,” Jenny said, fighting tears as she urged her mount home.

Nicholas kept pace beside her, merging into the fields when they reached the plantation.

Overwrought, Jenny went to the house and steeped the ginger tea Dr. Jones had given her. After sipping a cupful, she vigorously attacked her chores. In six months, her year would be over. For now, she must think about her future and forget the loneliness that continually tormented her.

On Christmas Day, Jenny carried a small tree into the house and trimmed it with painted cookies, ribbons, and lace. It was a reminder of the Christmases she had shared with her father and Molly.

Nicholas stepped into the parlor and saw her fascination with the tree.

“It’s not too late. Do you want to go home for Christmas, Jenny?” he kindly asked.

“No, not this Christmas,” she responded, thinking of the passionate encounter that might take place were they to share the same bed again. She refused to let herself be vulnerable. “When Father is well enough, I would love for him to visit
Small Timbers
.”

“Perhaps next year,” Nicholas said.

Jenny looked at him sharply, hiding the pain that gripped her. “There will not be a next year for us. We will have gone our separate ways by then.” She sighed. “The other day I visited father and Molly and lavished them with gifts. I told them you sent your tidings but couldn’t get away from the plantation.” She started for the kitchen. “Come, let’s eat. I have cooked roast fowl with all the trimmings.” She stopped abruptly and faced him. “Since it is Christmas, with your approval, I’d like to serve dinner in the dining room.

“Please do.” Nicholas said. “It is, indeed, a special day.” He helped her carry in the food and set it on the table. “Your cooking is always good Jenny, but you’ve made an extra effort to make the day special by fixing my favorite meal.”

As he sat down to dinner, Jenny brought in mincemeat pie and sat it on the sideboard. She then placed a candle in a holder made of pinecones and sprigs of evergreen and centered it on the table. She lit the Christmas taper, bringing a soft glow to the room and sending warmth between them. As the candle flickered, their eyes met.

“Let’s call a truce and enjoy the spirit of the season,” Nicholas said, then filled his plate with the sumptuous fare she had fixed.

Agreeable to his suggestion, Jenny nodded. Being careful not to spill food on the good linen while filling her plate, she glanced up and saw his forlorn expression. She dropped a lump of sugar into her coffee mug. “Why do you look so gloom?”

“I was thinking that it’s been a long time since I celebrated Christmas. Sad memories still plague me after all these years.”

Jenny sipped her coffee. “Do you want to talk about it?”

He nodded. “When I was eight, my parents and I left Arkansas to spend the holidays with Uncle James and Aunt Louise here at the plantation. We were caught in a blinding storm, and they became victims of an accident when the carriage hit an embankment and hurled them into the freezing river. They drowned instantly. The horse died, too, when the axle broke and the carriage fell on top of him. I was thrown from the carriage and survived by landing in a thick bed of leaves.”

“It must have been a terrifying experience for you,” Jenny gasped. “What happened after the accident?”

Nicholas furrowed his brow and brushed a lock of hair away from his forehead. “I wandered around in a daze until a farmer spied me from the road. He pumped me for details and then brought me here to my uncle’s plantation.”

Jenny reached over and patted his arm. “What must have begun as a pleasurable trip became a night of terror for you.”

“Indeed it did. Sadness hung over me for days when they found my parents’ bodies and buried them here on the plantation. Uncle James and Aunt Louise opened their home to me and gave me a proper upbringing in a warm and loving environment. They saw to my education, but farming was in my blood. No amount of schooling could dissuade me from becoming a plantation worker. Together, we oversaw
Small Timbers
. With hard work, the plantation prospered as we grew cotton, grains, and corn. Aunt Louise nurtured me with love and kindness. When she died of consumption, I felt abandoned again and questioned why those whom I loved were taken away from me. Then Uncle James died.”

They were pulled from their discussion when, in the distance, they heard the laborers celebrating the happy occasion with their families.

“Warren said you sent potpourri gifts to the women for Christmas. This is a rare occurrence, Jenny.”

“Yes,” she replied. “I used scraps of material for a base, then I put a mixture of oranges, cinnamon, and cloves together and tied a ribbon around them. I thought it might add a festive touch to the drab cabins.”

“You are kind, Jenny. Your thoughtfulness goes beyond words,” Nicholas praised between mouthfuls of succulent roast duck.

They lingered over mincemeat pie and coffee.

“After dinner, I want to find Billy. I have a bag of marbles for him,” Jenny said. She took a sip of coffee, enjoying the aroma of the dark brew. “Lest Warren feel forgotten, I made him an apple cobbler.”

“Billy will be delighted with your gift,” Nicholas said. “And Warren always brags about your cooking. I’ll walk with you to his house.”