Valentine Wishes (Baxter Academy Book 1) (28 page)

I can’t help but smile.

“What does she tell you?”

“That it’s too late and even if it wasn’t, she’s afraid.’

At least it’s a smidgen of hope. “And you still won’t give me her address and phone number?”

“Best friend code. Sorry.”

I’d write Tyler but have no clue how to get ahold of him. “When are you going to see her? I assume you are.”

“I’m not telling you that. You’ll follow me.”

I make the sign of an “X” over my chest. “Promise.”

“Okay, why do you want to know?”

I take all the cash out of my wallet, about a hundred dollars, which I had planned on spending on Jackie if we went somewhere that didn’t take plastic. “Next time you go there, stop at the florist and get her the best bouquet this will buy.”

She counts it out and her eyebrows rise.

“Give me a piece of paper and pen.”

She does and I write out a note. “Still waiting. Love Brett.” Make sure you put this with them.

“I’ll be happy too.” She takes the note and puts it in her purse beneath the counter.

“At least tell me when you are going.”

“Second weekend in December,” she answers. “And, you had better not follow me.”

“
I
’m not sure
I can do this.” At least that’s what I said to Ashley before leaving her house.

“Fine, be miserable and wonder for the rest of your life if he was the one,” Ashley scolded.

Brett has sent flowers three times. The three times Ashley came to visit. She may not have betrayed my confidence by giving Brett my phone number or address, though a part of me wishes she would have, it didn’t keep her from colluding with the enemy either.

Okay, he isn’t exactly an enemy and I haven’t gotten over him either. You just can’t stop loving someone because they screwed up. In this case, I screwed up. I see that now. Stupid and stubborn. Tyler was right, which makes it even harder to go to Brett.

I’m not good at swallowing my pride and groveling.

How do I even know he wants me back? The last flowers were two weeks ago. They are dead and drying out, but still in a vase on my table.

The loss of him really hit home this morning, Valentine’s Day. I swear, everyone around my apartment complex is in love. You can’t spit without hitting young lovers. Well, I didn’t exactly spit, because, well, that is gross. But, they are everywhere so I got out of the city and came home. Not that I have a home. Technically, I could stay at the plantation house, but that place has been closed up and it’s kind of creepy with everything covered. And, because I didn’t want to be around any of my family, who are mostly happily married adults, probably exchanging candy and flowers, I went to Ashley’s. Of course, the first thing I see is a huge bouquet of roses from her non-engaged, someday may marry, boyfriend.

The moment I told her I was thinking of visiting Brett, she dragged me out of the house, to the nearest lingerie shop and then a boutique, where she picked out the perfect dress and shoes and then to the salon for hair and makeup. It was all too much, but I didn’t protest either. For me, it was procrastination. For Ashley, to set the perfect mood.

I’m not sure what kind of mood I’m going for. I’d be happy with forgiveness and then try again. I’m equally sure that the matching panty and bra set won’t even be seen. Yet, I’m wearing them, sitting outside of Brett’s house, trying to get the nerve to go inside.

Instead, I’m afraid I’m going to be sick.

Since I don’t want to ruin a perfectly nice, and new, dress, I decide to only go halfway with my plan. I don’t have the guts to actually walk to his door. I thought I’d find nerve to do so on the drive up, but instead, I lost what little nerve I possessed.

Lights are on inside and since there is an unfamiliar car in the drive, I decide it’s best if I don’t disturb him. Taking a deep breath I get out of my car, taking the red box from the front seat with me. My present to him. One I’ve been working on since last summer, once I figured out how to use my grandmother’s embroidery machine. He’ll probably think it’s stupid, but it means something to me. I also put my new phone number in the box.

After leaving the box on the hood on the driver’s side, I hurry back to my car, glancing at his house one more time.

And stop.

He’s in the middle of the living room and he’s not alone. That shadow is definitely a woman, with long straight hair.

Tears spring to my eyes and my stomach rolls.

He’s moved on. It’s my fault of course. Still, my heart has just been shredded in my chest.

I need to go, get out of there, but all I can do is stand and watch them move through the living room.

I tell myself that I hope he’s happy, but it’s a lie. Not that it matters, he’s moved on and I can’t ruin his current relationship with my gift.

I turn on my heel and start back for his car when his front door opens.

Shit!

I can’t get there and back to my own car without being seen and I sure as hell do not want to be seen right now, so I run back to my car and duck inside before they come out. The two of them pause on the front step and the girl hugs him. I can’t watch anymore and turn the key on my car and get out of there as fast as I can and pray he didn’t notice me.

T
urning from Claire
, I look out into the street when a sports car starts up and barely catch the flash of red while it drives off.

“Jackie?”

“Jackie who?”

“Jackie, I told you about her.”

“The girl that dumped you at her brother’s funeral?”

“She was messed up, Claire. You should understand that better than anyone.”

She smiles at me sadly. “Why didn’t she come up to the house?”

“That’s what I’d like to know.” Then it hits me. “Crap!”

“What?”

“She saw you. She probably saw me hug you and doesn’t know who you are.”

“Oh, shit! What are you going to do?”

“Go after her.”

Claire looks me up and down. “Like that?”

She has a point. I’ve been lazy today and have be sitting around in flannel pajama bottoms and a t-shirt.

Okay, depressed too. This is how I’ve pretty much spend most of my weekends since the funeral.

“Do I need to pick something out or are you going to go change and go after her.”

Why the hell am I still standing here? “Have fun tonight.” I run back into the house.

I don’t think I’ve showered and dress so quickly in my life. I’ve got to catch up to Jackie somehow but I don’t have a fucking clue what direction she took. Did she go back to her family? To the train station in Poughkeepsie? The train station in Albany? Two totally different directions.

I grab my phone and dial Ashley’s number as I head to my car.

“Where is she going?”

“Jackie?”

“Who else. I just missed her.” Then I tell her what Jackie probably saw and what she is probably thinking. “I have to find her.”

“She’s on her way to my place.”

“Where is that?”

“Five blocks down from your Uncle Quinn. An old Victorian. If she beats you here, her car will be out front. Top floor apartment.”

“Got it. Thanks.”

I jump in my car and start it up then turn on the defroster before I grab the scraper. That’s when I see the red box. It has to be from Jackie. I haven’t even had so much as a drink with any other woman, let alone date anyone, so nobody else would be leaving me a Valentine’s gift.

I grab the box and jump back into the car and open it. The first thing I see is a telephone number. I’m tempted to call, but I’d rather see her first. What is beneath makes me laugh. “Oh Jackie, I do love you.”

“
S
hit
, shit, shit.” This cannot be happening to me now.

The tire thuds on my car as I pull off the road and onto the shoulder. There is a spare tire in the trunk, not that I know how to change it.

Actually I do know how, it’s just that the lug nuts are usually too tight for me to loosen and since I had my tires rotated just last week, I’m sure they’re so tight that only Hercules can loosen them.

Plus it’s getting dark and I’m wearing black.

I flip on my emergency lights and call Ashley.

“Hey, I have a flat tire.”

“Did you go see Brett?”

Tears start up but I swallow them. “Yes, and no. I saw him, he didn’t see me.”

“What happened?”

“I don’t want to talk about it. Just give me the number of a tow truck in the area.”

“Where are you?”

“I don’t know. Somewhere on I87 headed south.”

“Got it. I’ll call you back.”

“Can’t you just look it up while I’m on the phone?”

She’s hung up before I can even finish my question.

This is just stupid. I could sit here all night waiting for a tow truck and then I wouldn’t have a way home. I’ll just have someone pick me up and one of my uncles can bring me back to my car tomorrow and they’ll change the tire.

But, who the hell do I call on Valentine’s Day? It’s the dinner hour, time for romance, and I don’t want to be the one to ruin it for anyone. Just because mine’s a disaster doesn’t mean anyone else should have to suffer.

A car pulls in behind me and cuts their lights but turns on the hazards. I can’t see who it is, though I doubt it’s anyone I know. I flip the button to make sure all of the doors are locked. With my luck it’s a serial killer. The perfect end to this miserable Valentine’s Day.

Even though I look in the side mirror, I can’t see him. Where the hell did he go? My nerves tighten and I grasp my phone, ready to hit 911. Like that would do any good since I’m not sure where the hell I am.

He stops next to the window on the passenger side and knocks on the glass with knuckle of his index finger.

I crack the window just enough to talk. My nerves are skipping all over the place as I start to sweat. I turn off the heater before I melt.

“Geez, Jackie, it’s cold out here.”

My heart skips. Brett?

Then he leans down.

Where did he come from?

“Can I get in?”

I hit the button, unlocking the door. He slides in and smiles. The box I left on his car is now in his lap.

I burst into tears.

T
his is not exactly
what I was expecting, but I’ll take anything right now and pull Jackie into my arms. Well, the best I can in a small sports car with a gear shift between us.

I just let her cry it out and rub her back, even though I’m not really sure why she’s crying. With four sisters I thought I had girls figured out, but Jackie has proven time and time again that I am clueless half the time.

“Why are you here?” She finally asks as she pulls away.

“Ashley told me.”

“I’m sorry. She should not have called you.”

“Why? I called her first, wanting to know where you were headed.”

Her eyes widen. “You saw me?”

“Yeah, and you still drive too fast.”

She bites her bottom lip. “Did I ruin your date?”

“Date?” I shouldn’t mess with her but I’ve waited almost six months for her. Longer than any guy should, but every time I thought about asking someone else out, it didn’t feel right. I wanted Jackie. I’ll always want her, so dating anyone else was just being unfair to them.

“I saw the girl with long hair.”

“She was just headed out. I wasn’t going with her.”

“Out?”

“Meeting up with friends for drinks.”

“On Valentine’s Day?”

“It’s not like she’s seeing anyone and hated the idea of sitting home tonight.”

“But…”

“You thought she was my date.”

Jackie’s cheeks turn read. “Yeah.”

“That would be gross. She’s my sister, Claire. She’s been living with me since Christmas.”

“Claire?”

“Sister. I told you about her.”

She starts to smile. “Claire!”

“Yeah.”

“I feel so stupid.”

“Hey, happens to us all.” I grab her hand. “Now, why did you come see me, finally?”

Jackie pulls back and her brow furrows. “I just want to give you that. I’d been holding onto it.”

Still skittish. I get it. It has been six months and in her shoes I might be too afraid to go back.

“About that,” I open the box and take out the piece of paper. “Thank you for your phone number. I’ve needed this. Ashley wouldn’t give it up for anything.”

She smiles and looks down. It’s not like Jackie to get embarrassed, but this is an odd situation too.

“I’m assuming this is for banana boat.”

She nods.

“The flat tire.”

Again she nods.

“I might earn another one tonight.” Then I pick up the third merit badge. “Why a telephone?”

Her face flames.

“Thought so. I wouldn’t mind earning one of those again either. Though doing the same thing in person is a lot better.”

“Those were a bad idea.”

“Hey, I earned each and every one of these merit badges.” I hold up the one with a book and the word Joy on it. “Is this because I’m such a good student, or do I need to read
The Joy of Sex
again?”

I didn’t think it was possible for anyone to turn as red as Jackie is right now.

I set it aside before she combusts and pick up the next one. “Snake. I do not want to earn another one of those.”

“Once was enough,” she agrees.

“Then there is this.” I pick up the heart. “Tell me Jackie, what does it mean, exactly?”

Moisture gathers in her eyes and she blinks as one slides out of the corner.

“My heart or yours?” I ask.

“Mine.”

“You’re giving it to me?”

“I already did.”

“I thought you took it back.”

“I tried but I couldn’t.” More tears fall. “I was so stupid, foolish, stubborn. You were right. I wasn’t thinking straight. Those first few weeks are a fog and then time passed and I was afraid to call.”

“My flowers should have convinced you otherwise.”

She looks down. “I was scared.”

“Of what?” I need to hear her say it.

“That once you saw me you would reject me and realize you didn’t want me after all.” She clutches her hands together but even in faded light I can see they are trembling. “Theo was right. Your job is important and necessary. Sometimes you will be gone and you will be in danger.” She blows out a breath. “I don’t have to like it though.”

“But, can you live with it?”

For the first time she looks me directly in the eye. “Yes. If it’s the only way I can have you, then yes. I’d rather live with you being gone or not making an appointment or event than never having you at all.”

I take her hands in mine again. “I need you to be sure about this. I can’t go through what I just did, waiting and hoping, feeling like an idiot for waiting on a woman who might never want me again.”

Her tears well again. “I’m so sorry. Can you ever forgive me?”

“Jackie, I already have. But, I’m scared to. How can I be sure that you won’t run again? Shut me out because I didn’t do what you thought I was supposed to do.” I’ve wanted this moment. To have her with me again. A hope of a future, but it also scares me. I need to know the answers to all of this now or it’s not going to work and we’ll be right back where we were at her brother’s funeral and I can’t do that again.

“All I can do is promise. You’ll have to trust. You will see.”

This will have to take trust. Yes, I love her, but I’m also cautious. Her rejection nearly killed me. Then again, there can never be love without risks. I take the heart merit badge and hand it back to her.

“Guard it.”

She takes it from me and puts it against her chest. “Always.”

Placing my hand behind her head I pull her close and kiss her deeply. A loving kiss, not a passionate one. There’s time for that later. Right now, I need her to know that I love her and she matters more than anything in the world. When I pull back she smiles at me.

“Valentine Wishes really do come true.” I can hear my mother’s words echo in my head as I say them.

“Valentine Wishes?”

“Something my mom always said. Make a wish for your love and it will come true.”

“I’ve never heard of Valentine Wishes.”

I laugh. “I’m pretty sure my mom made it up, but I like the idea of it. You can only wish for something for your love or they don’t come true.”

“And you made a wish?”

“And it came true.” Then I grin. “And the signs are all there that this is right.”

“Signs? You don’t believe in signs.”

“I think I may be changing my mind.” I hand her the merit badge with the tire. “Back where we started, and it can only get better from here.”

Jackie takes it, clutching it in her hand with the heart. “I love you, Brett. I never stopped. Even when I was hurt, stubborn and stupid, I never stopped loving you.”

“And I didn’t stop loving you. I’ve just been waiting for you to come back.”