Waiting for Perfect (23 page)

There’s a large
pool of water bordered by steep cement walls.
 
The trail encircles the body of water, and beyond the trail
are more homes.
 
I never knew this
was here.
 

“What is this
place?” I ask.

He’s standing on a
large rock with his fists resting on both hips.
 
The wind is rustling through his hair.
 
He looks like a conqueror.
 
I usually don’t envision Nick as a man
of strength and power, but seeing him now, that’s just what he is.
 
I know he gets in fights sometimes, so
he must be testosterone-ridden to a certain degree, but he always seems softer
than Sebastian, more gentle.
 
Why
am I even comparing the two of them?
 
They’re so totally different.

“It’s the
reservoir,” he answers.
 
He jumps off
the rock and lands in front of me.
 
“Feel like going for a swim?”
 
His smile broadens and he starts running down toward the water before I
can even answer.

I call after
him.
 
“Nick, I don’t think we can
swim here!”
 
I start running in his
direction.
 
When I come down the
cement slope to where the water line is, he’s already sitting and taking off
his shoes.

“What are you
doing?” I ask, breathless.
 
I’ve
never seen this side of him.
 
What’s
gotten into him today?

“Kendra, come
on!
 
It’s ninety degrees out
here.
 
Let’s swim.”

I look down at my
outfit.
 
“I can’t jump in wearing
this.
 
It will get ruined!”

Barefoot, he stands
up and begins removing his t-shirt.
 
“Then take it off,” he says with a devious smirk on his face.

My head is
spinning.
 
This new side of Nick is
impressive, yet totally shocking.
 
He pulls his shirt over his head and throws it by his shoes.
 
I instantly feel my cheeks redden as I
take in the sight of him.
 
He is
lean but muscular and sinewy.
 
Strong veins line both his arms.
 
His abs are well defined, and his shoulders are broad and
strong.

When he turns to
look at the water, I have an excellent view of his back, and I notice he has a
second tattoo on his right shoulder.
 
It’s a cross with a date inked underneath it.

“Well?
 
You coming?” he asks.
 
Then, he pulls off his jeans.
 
He’s standing almost naked in front of
me, wearing only his boxers.
 
Holy
hell.
 
I suspected Nick was beautiful,
but this is more than I could have dreamed.
 
His bronze skin is flawless.

“Uh,” I stammer,
rendered speechless from the dark beauty in front of me.
 
I try again.
 
“Yeah.”
 
I clear
my throat and pull my gaze away from his body.
 
“Yes, let’s do it.”

I slowly begin to
undress.
 
I can’t believe I’m doing
this in front of Nick.
 
Pulling off
my shorts, I am beyond thrilled that I chose boy shorts for undergarments this
morning instead of my usual thong.
 
I remove my pink button-up shirt and decide to leave my camisole on,
rather than go in just my bra.
 
My
nerves are on overdrive, and I’m consumed with the thought that he’ll think I’m
huge.

Nick is trying to
keep his eyes on anything but me.
 
I smile and relax, knowing he’s offering me privacy.
 
When I’m done, he looks back at me, and
his eyes rove over my body.
 
He
doesn’t have that hungry need in his eyes, like most seventeen-year-old boys
would.
 
Instead, his eyes hold
appreciation, like he’s admiring a fine piece of art.

“You’re stunning,”
he whispers, so softly that I barely hear him.

It takes me off
guard for a moment.
 
He carries on
like he didn’t say a word.
 
“Let’s
go,” he says.

I follow him down
to the waterline, and we get our toes wet.
 
It’s not as cold as I expected it to be.
 
Nick backs up a little.
 
Then, without warning, he sprints
toward the water and plunges in, splashing everywhere.

He dives under and
out of sight.
 
Just when I’m
wondering where the heck he could have gone, he resurfaces twenty yards from
shore.
 
He throws his head to the
side, getting his wet hair out of his face, but it just falls again in dark
fringes on his cheekbones.

“Well?” he says.

I smile.
 
“I’m coming!
 
I’m coming!”
 
I don’t
create nearly such a show as I glide in easily until I’m up to my neck.
 
The cool water feels good on my hot
skin, and soon, I’m pretty damn comfortable floating in the Coto reservoir.
 
My mind isn’t thinking of anything but
Nicolás.

“So what do you
want to do after high school,” he asks, swimming in a circle around me.

“I don’t know.
 
I think I might go to community college
for a couple years and then transfer.
 
How about you?”
 
I know Nick
is smart.
 
He’d probably get into
any school he wanted.

“I’m applying for
some scholarships.
 
Mom doesn’t
have a whole lot of money to send me off somewhere fancy.
 
I might end up at community college too
if my scholarships don’t come through.”

“So it’s just you
and your mom then?”

He dunks his head
under the water and comes up again.
 
“Yeah.
 
And Sebastian.”

 
“Where’s your dad?”
 
I don’t want him to think I’m prying,
but I’m curious.

He floats on his
back, staring up to the sky for a few seconds before he straightens out and
says, “He died a few years ago.”

I feel like a jerk
for bringing it up.
 
“Oh, Nick, I’m
so sorry.
 
I didn’t know.”

“I know.
 
It’s okay.
 
We found out he had cancer, and four months later, he was
gone.”
 
He picks up a piece of bark
that’s floating on the water and chucks it onto the shore.

“That must have
been awful for you.”
 
I try to
imagine what it would be like to lose one of my parents.
 
My mom can be a bitch, but it’s better
than her being dead.

“Yeah, it was
pretty rough.
 
My sister took it
the hardest.
 
She started using
drugs.
 
My mom made her move
out.
 
We had to take care of all my
dad’s medical bills, so money’s been tight the last few years.”
 
He swims closer and turns his back
toward me, showing me his tattoo. “This is for him.
 
He died four years ago this November.”

I run my finger
along the tattoo.
 
It’s a
gothic-style cross with the day of his father’s death written in fine black
ink.
 
I can’t help but notice the
feel of his skin.
 
It’s so soft,
almost velvety.
 
A stirring of warmth
flares inside me as I touch him, and it surprises the hell out of me.
 
I remove my hand from him instantly,
like it will burn me if I keep it there.

“Nick.
 
I had no idea.”
 
I remember the first day I met
him.
 
I asked him if he was new,
and he said no.
 
I wonder how long
he’d been living here before I had met him.
 
Four years ago would have put him in seventh grade.
 
“What middle school did you go to?”

“Why?” he asks,
running his hands through his long hair to slick it back from his face.
 
It’s nice to see his face.
 
He’s rather nice to look at altogether
actually.

“I’m just
curious.
 
The first day I met you,
I thought you were new.”

He shrugs.
 
“Yeah, I remember.”
 
He looks kind of pissed all of the
sudden, and I wonder if I said something wrong.
 
Maybe he doesn’t like talking about that time in his life.

“I went to Las
Flores,” he says carefully.

I smile at
him.
 
“Me too!
 
I’ll have to look for you in my
yearbook.”

“Please don’t.
 
I was a dork in middle school.”
 
He covers his eyes with his hands, trying
to hide.

I laugh.
 
“Everyone’s a dork in middle school!”

“I’m sure you
weren’t a dork.
 
I’m sure you were
just as gorgeous as you are now.”
 
He dunks under the water before I can respond.
 
He thinks I’m gorgeous.

When he rises to
the surface again, I’m about to tell him just how much of a dork I was in
middle school, when a man yelling from across the reservoir stops me.

“Hey, you two!
 
Get out of there!
 
You can’t be in there!”
 
The man is yelling at the top of his
lungs.
 
As I focus my eyes on him,
I can see he’s wearing a security guard’s uniform.
 
Great.
 
He’ll
probably call the police.
 
That’s
all I need.
 
My mom would kill me.

The man starts
walking over to our side of the reservoir, and I swim for the shore.
 
“Shit!
 
Come on, Nick!”

When we get out of
the water, we’re both dripping wet and struggling with our clothes and shoes,
laughing the whole time.
 
We both
look ridiculous.
 
Nick’s boxers are
clinging to his toned thighs, and his hair is dripping into his eyes.
 
My camisole is showing every line of my
bra, and I’m thankful that the padded cups are preventing a full-on nipple
show.

We sprint back down
the trail to my car.
 
When we close
ourselves inside the Benz, we are both laughing hysterically.
 
There is water dripping onto my
seats.
 
Wet dirt is smeared all
over my floor mats.
 
Our clothes
are sticking to us, along with dirt from the trail.

Nick is craning his
neck to peer out the back window.
 
“Step on it, Kendra!”

I throw the car in
gear and floor it, looking in my rearview mirror at a hefty man running down
the trail in his security uniform.
 
“I thought you said we could swim there!”

He gives me a
playful look.
 
“I never said that.”

“Nick!” I exclaim,
still giggling.

NICK

We’re cruising down
the street with the music blaring.
 
The windows are down, and the hot air is blowing through the
car, drying us off quickly.
 
I
can’t believe I’m here with Kendra Voss.

My God, I about
shit myself when she started to undress.
 
She didn’t leave much to the imagination when she got out of the
water.
 
That damn shirt was
clinging to her boobs, outlining them perfectly.
 
I’ve actually seen her boobs when she was passed out at
Jeff’s party.
 
I would never tell
her though.
 
She’d be humiliated.

It’s been nice to
not think about Ryan and the lawsuit all afternoon, but visualizing Kendra
lying helpless on that bed brings it all back again.
 
Without thinking, I say, “So have you decided what to do
about Ryan?”

I can sense her
mood shift, and the easy smile on her face falls.
 
Way to ruin the mood,
idiot
.
 
I had actually been
acting pretty decent all day.
 
Raj
would have been proud of me.
 
I got
Kendra to have fun with me – getting nearly naked was just a bonus
– and here I am ruining the whole thing.

“No.
 
I haven’t decided.”
 
She turns down the radio.
 
“Which way to your house?” she asks.

I tell her I’m by
the golf course, so she starts driving in that direction.
 
She remains quiet.
 
I feel bad I even brought it up.
 
I just want her to do the right
thing.
 
She deserves to have Ryan
Morgan pay for what he did to her.
 
He needs to be punished for it.

I guide her through
my neighborhood until we’re in front of my house.
 
I’m glad to see the Mustang’s not here.
 
She puts the car into Park and lets the
engine idle.
 
I’m in no hurry to
get out of the car, and she doesn’t say goodbye just yet.

“Nicolás, why do
you want me to press charges so badly?
 
Is there something you get out of this if I do?”

“What?
 
No!
 
Why would you even say that?”
 
Okay, I am a total lying scumbag.
 
I totally think they’ll drop the entire lawsuit if Kendra
presses charges, but I can’t tell her that.
 
She’ll think I’m a selfish prick.
 
Plus, that’s not the only reason I want her to press
charges.
 
She deserves justice to
be served – right up Morgan’s ass.

She shakes her
head.
 
“I’m sorry.
 
It’s just that you seem so determined
to have me press charges.
 
I don’t
get it.”

I look into her
hazel eyes and take her hand in mine.
 
“Kendra, you deserve to be happy.
 
The freak-show that attacked you deserves to get ass-raped in
prison.
 
I know you want to forget
the whole thing, but the truth is, you won’t.
 
You probably won’t ever forget what happened to you.”

The way her lips
tighten together makes me think she’s about to yell at me.
 
In a tone that reveals her irritation,
she finally says, “Why can’t you just drop it, Nick?”
 
She avoids my eyes and looks out the windshield.

My heart
sinks.
 
I mentally berate myself
for messing this up with her.
 
Why
can’t she see that I’m pushing this because I care about her?

I don’t know what
else to say, and the tension radiating off her body tells me it’s time to call
it a day.
 
I grab for the door
handle and open it slowly.
 
“I’m
sorry, Kendra.
 
I had a good time
with you today.
 
I’m sorry I even
brought it up.”
 

She doesn’t say
anything as I step out of the car.

Maybe it would be
easier if I did drop it.
 
Maybe I
should give it up.
 
But if I don’t
push her, who is going to?
 
She needs
to be pushed.
 
She needs to believe
she deserves justice.

Leaning back into
the car to grab my backpack, I say, “You’re worth it, you know.”

Her head snaps
toward me.
 
There’s a sad look on
her face.

I continue.
 
“The fights with Ryan, the shit-storm
that pressing charges might cause, the sleepless nights, maybe losing some
friends.
 
You’re worth the fight, Kendra.”

Before she can say
anything, I close the car door and start walking toward my house.
 
Her Benz sits idle for a while before
driving off.
 
I wonder if she
regrets hanging out with me today.
 
Maybe we should have just studied like we’d planned.

I was completely
surprised when she stormed into the library this afternoon and cancelled our
study session.
 
I know she could
use the physics help, but I didn’t really care at that point.
 
If she needed me, I was going to be
there in any way she wanted me.

She looked so
distraught in the library.
 
I
wanted to ask her what was going on, but the next thing I knew, she was talking
to me about driving and then urging me to get behind the wheel.
 
I was so nervous being around her,
especially when I suggested swimming in the reservoir.
 
I thought she’d turn me down for sure,
but then she started taking off her shirt.
 
My God, I almost had a heart attack.
 
Then I had to ruin it all by bringing up
Ryan.
 
I wonder what Calculus will
be like tomorrow.
 
Maybe I should
text her and apologize.

I’m in my bedroom
taking off my wet clothes when I hear my phone ding with a text notification.
 
For a split second, I think that it
might be Kendra, but then I come to my senses.
 
She’s pissed at me.
 
She won’t be texting me tonight.

It’s from Raj.
 

I told my dad about Ryan’s lawsuit.
 
He’s calling your mom.
 
Sorry, man.

I’m going to kill
him.

I hear the garage
door open and panic.
 
I wonder if Mr.
Sekhar has called my mom yet.
 
I
wonder if she’s about to march up the stairs and rip me a new one.
 
I don’t wait around to find out.
 
I grab a towel from the hallway closet
and lock myself in the bathroom.

The steam from the
shower quickly fills the small bathroom.
 
I sit on the edge of the bath with my head in my hands wondering what
the hell I will tell my mother.

A half hour later
– yes, I was majorly stalling to avoid my mom – I dart to my
bedroom and close the door.
 
Maybe
if I can get dressed fast enough, I can sneak out before she comes upstairs to
yell at me.

Wishful thinking.

There’s a knock at
the door, followed by a voice that sounds mad and hurt at the same time.
 
It doesn’t take a genius to figure out
that she knows about the lawsuit.

“Nicolás!
 
Are you in there?
 
We need to talk, mijo.
 
Open the door.”

Shit.

I hurry into my khaki
Dickies shorts and pull on a black t-shirt with a
Dia de los Muertos
skull on the front of it.
 
After fingering the knots out of my
hair, I brace myself and open the door.

Mom barges in with
her fists on her hips.
 
She’s a
tiny, frail woman, but there’s a fierceness about her that exudes a
don’t-mess-with-me vibe, and it’s currently scaring the shit out of me.

“What’s up, mom,” I
say, playing dumb.

She paces my
bedroom with her eyes to the ground like she’s searching for something.
 
She’s probably searching for the words
she wants to throw at me about this lawsuit.

“Mijo, what is this
I hear about a boy at school wanting to have you arrested?”

I gawk at her.
 
“What?
 
No, mom.
 
He
doesn’t want to have me arrested.
 
Where do you hear such things?”

She plops herself on
the edge of my bed and folds her arms across her chest.
 
“Mr. Sekhar called me this afternoon.
 
Raj said you were in some kind of
trouble.
 
He’s worried about
you.
 
What exactly is going on,
Nicolás?”

I sit next to her
on the bed.
 
Sebastian told me that
I should tell her, and now that she knows anyway, I might as well come clean.

I start with the
night of Jeff’s party when this whole ordeal began.
 
I tell her about Ryan drugging Kendra, me fighting him off
her, and the second fight in the school parking lot.
 
I finish by telling her about the man who came to serve me
with the lawsuit papers.

By the end of it,
she’s tearing up as I suspected she might.
 
Mom’s a crier.
 
She dabs her eyes with a tissue that she always seems to carry in her
pocket.
 
I think she’s going to
yell at me for fighting, but instead she throws her arms around me and pulls me
into a tight hug.

“Oh, Nicolás!
 
I know you meant well, son.
 
You protected that girl, and that’s
honorable.
 
You make me proud,
mijo.”

This is not the
reaction I was expecting from her.
 
Her face is buried in my shoulder, and I can feel her wet tears coming
through my t-shirt.
 
I put a hand
on each of her shoulders and pull back from her.

“Mom, I’m being
sued for, like, a ton of money.
 
I
thought you’d be furious.
 
What the
heck are we going to do?”

She smiles through
her tears and chuckles.
 
“Mijo,
when he is convicted of attempted rape, he will not be able to sue you for
anything.
 
You were protecting
her.”
 
She says it like it’s the
simplest answer in the world.

“Mom, it’s not that
easy.”

“Of course it
is!
 
Surely that girl has pressed
charges against that boy.
 
When he
is convicted, the lawsuit will be over.”
 
She stands up and straightens her blouse, which has red paint splattered
on it from her duties at the daycare.
 
She uses the tissue to wipe under her eyes and stuffs it back into her
pocket.

She pats my head because
I’m her son, and I will forever be five-years-old in her eyes.
 
“It will be okay,” she says,
smiling.
 
“You’ll see.
 
It will all work out, mijo.
 
That boy will be going to jail.”

She doesn’t wait
for me to say anything.
 
She walks
down the hall to her bedroom, closing her door behind her.

I lie back on my
bed, crossing my ankles.
 
I’m
tempted to call Raj and bitch him out for spilling the beans to his dad.
 
I pick up my phone to dial his number
and see the text notification light blinking.

It’s from Candace.

I’m going to Yogurtland.
 
I’m picking you up at six.

Frozen yogurt at
dinnertime.
 
I’m not surprised.

I glance at my
bedside clock to see it’s 6:05.
 
There’s
a honk outside, and I jump up and peer out onto the street to see a Jetta
parked in my driveway.
 
It’s
filthy, and the front right fender has a dent that I can see from here.
 
I don’t remember it being there last
time I rode in her death trap.

Yelling to my mom
that I’m going out, I run down the stairs and out of the house.

When I open the car
door, Candace is staring at me with large brown eyes that are almost perfectly
round and rimmed in purple liner.
 
Her hair is windblown and hanging in knots over her shoulders.
 
She’d look even prettier without that frown
on her face.

“Why didn’t you
text me back?” she says.
 
“I sent
you a text almost an hour ago.
 
Didn’t you get it?”
 
She backs
her car down the driveway after I shut my door.