Waiting for Perfect (35 page)

He
leans into me, so I’m arching backward against the hood of his car. With one
hand at the back of my head, he grabs a fistful of my hair and pulls me back to
have better access to my neck.
 
He’s frenzied, sucking and biting, lowering his head down the deep
v-neck of my sweater.
 
His other
hand slowly rises up my waist until it stops right below the wire frame of my
bra.
 
He’s waiting.
 
He wants to make sure he’s not
overstepping.

I
grab his hand in mine and pull it up higher, so my breast fills his palm.
 
He squeezes it gently and makes a
grunting noise.
 
Then he takes my
lips again, hard.
 
My body is
squirming against his, pleasure radiating from my very core.
 
He makes me feel lost, like nothing
else in the world exists but him and me.

He
brings his hand down my waist again until it’s resting on my hip.
 
The other hand follows, and he pulls my
hips into his, crushing his hardness between my legs.
 
The feel of him pressing against me is ecstasy.
 
I claw down his back and hold his waist
closer to mine.
 
I don’t want to be
apart from this man.
 
Ever.

Just
when I think it would be perfectly fine by me if he took me in the backseat of
his Mustang right here, he abruptly pulls himself off of me.

“Kendra,”
he pants, breathless.
 
“We have to
get home.
 
I don’t want you to get
in trouble.”

Dammit!
 
Stupid curfew.
 
I try to catch my breath.
 
The absence of him on my skin leaves me
cold and wanting.
 
He turns away
from me and paces.
 
I stand up
straight and try to smooth out my sweater.
 
When he turns back to me, he is wearing a smug grin, his
dimple showing brightly even in the moonlight.
 
I am totally awestruck by this man.

He
closes the space between us and puts his arms around my waist, drawing me into
him slowly.
 
Then he gives me a
soft peck on the lips.
 
“Come on,”
he says with a smile.
 
“I could
stay here all night with you, but we have to go.”

I
nod in agreement and reluctantly climb into the passenger seat.
 
He comes around the other side and
shuts his door.
 
After starting the
car and revving the engine a few times, he turns on the heater.

“Are
you warm enough?
 
You’re soaked
from the ice.”
 
He fiddles with the
vents until they’re pointed my way.
 
He’s good at taking care of me.

“Yeah,
I’m okay.”
 
I look down to my
sweater, which is wet and covered in grass.
 
“My mom might kill me when she sees my sweater though.
 
She bought it for my birthday.”

We
start driving toward home.
 
“When’s
your birthday?” Sebastian asks.

“July
thirtieth.
 
Yours?”

“June
seventeenth.”
 
He looks me up and
down, like he’s picturing me naked.
 
He probably is.
 
“That means
we’re both eighteen.
 
Adults.
 
Yet, we both have to be home by
ten.”
 
He laughs.

I
think about the ridiculousness of his sentiment.
 
He’s right.
 
Ideas pop into my head about pulling the car over and continuing where
we left off back there.
 
I think
he’s thinking the same thing.

We’re
quiet for a while, before he says.
 
“But I don’t want to piss off your parents by getting you home
late.
 
They haven’t even met me
yet.
 
That would be a horrible
first impression.”

“Yeah,”
I say.
 
“I guess you’re
right.”
 
I think about my mom again
and what she will say when she knows about Sebastian and his family.
 
I guess it’s time I find out.
 
“Hey, when you drop me off, do you want
to come in and meet them?”

He
tenses up instantly.
 
I’m sure he
doesn’t want to meet my parents, but he’ll have to meet them sometime.
 
I mean, if we are going to have any
kind of future together, he’ll need to charm my mother at some point.

“Sure,”
he says nervously.
 
“I met your
brother.
 
He’s cool.
 
How bad can the rest of the family be?”

He
has no idea.

We
pull up to my house at exactly ten o’clock.
 
The lights are still on, telling me my parents are still
downstairs.
 
He rushes out of the
car and comes to my side to open my door.
 
This will never get old.
 
I
love his chivalry.

“Okay,”
he says as he holds my hand to help me out.
 
“Let’s do it.”

I
know he’s nervous, and I don’t blame him.
 
“Thanks for doing this, Sebastian.
 
Actually, thank you for this whole night.
 
It’s been…perfect.”

He
smiles and leans in to kiss my cheek.
 
“It was my pleasure.”

We
walk up to the house hand-in-hand.
 
When we stroll through the front door, my parents look up
from the couch in surprise.
 
My mom
stands and eyes Sebastian.

“Hello,
Kendra,” she says.
 
She evaluates
Sebastian from his shoes up to his dark hair.
 
“And who is this very dashing young man?”
 
Oh my God, is my mom actually flirting
with my boyfriend?
 
Gross.

“Mom,
Derrick, this is Sebastian Veneto.”
 
I proudly introduce the wonderful man that is the source of all my joy
lately.

Derrick
stands too, and they both walk over to meet us by the door.
 
Derrick extends his hand to Sebastian,
who gives him a firm handshake.

“Sebastian,
it’s nice to meet you.”
 
Derrick’s
eyes dart to mine for a moment, and a smile grows across his face.
 
“We don’t meet a lot of Kendra’s
friends.”

My
mother interrupts by pushing her hand in front of Sebastian.
 
He shakes her hand and smiles.
 
“Sebastian, it’s wonderful to meet you.
 
Veneto…Veneto,” she says, running his
name through her mind.
 
“I’m not
sure I know your family.
 
Are you
new around here?”

Sebastian
slips his hands into his pockets.
 
“Yes, actually.
 
I moved
here over the summer.”

“Oh!
 
That’s wonderful.
 
Where do you live exactly?” I know my
mom wants to know what neighborhood he lives in to get some idea of how much
money he has.
 
He lives in a small townhouse
with his aunt and cousin.
 
He has
to share a room with another person.
 
My mom will die when she finds this out.
 
Maybe introducing them was a bad idea.

“Actually
I live just a couple of streets from here,” he says.

“Oh!”
my mother says, thinking he lives in our neighborhood, which must be acceptable.
 
“And your family?
 
What does your dad do for work,
Sebastian?”
 
I knew this question
would be coming.
 
I look to
Sebastian to see how he’ll deal with it.

“My
parents are still in San Antonio.
 
I live with my cousin.”

My
mom turns to me, giving me a strange look.
 
“Oh?
 
And why is
that?”

I
don’t like this quick turn in questioning, and I don’t want Sebastian to feel
uncomfortable, so I put an end to it.

“Mom,
Sebastian needs to get home.
 
Curfew.
 
I just wanted to
introduce you.
 
Sebastian and I are
going to the homecoming dance on Saturday.”

Derrick
nods, “Ah.
 
So it was you that was
in the house yesterday.”
 
He looks
at me.
 
“Marcus told me he let one
of your friends into your room for something to do with homecoming.”

Sebastian
laughs easily.
 
“Guilty as charged,
Sir.”
 
His eyes dart to me, and I
can tell he is nervous.
 
He’s
usually so confident.
 
I don’t ever
see this side of Sebastian. It’s actually kind of cute.

“Well,
if you’ll excuse me, I have to get home now.”
 
Sebastian shakes Derrick’s hand again.

“It
was good to meet you, Sebastian.”
 
My mother gives him a flirty smile.
 
“Welcome to the neighborhood.”

“I’m
going to walk him out.
 
I’ll be
right back.”
 
I turn to leave with
Sebastian.
 
We walk out the door,
and I close it behind me.
 
“Well,
that wasn’t so bad, was it?” I ask him.

“Not
too bad.”
 
He looks past me to the
open window, watching for my parents.
 
When he sees the coast is clear, he leans in and hugs me.
 
“I loved spending time with you
tonight.”

“Me
too,” I say.
 
I pull back to look
into his dark eyes.
 
“Thank
you.
 
It was a lot of fun.”
 
I kiss him softly.
 
He kisses me back quickly and pulls
away.
 
I think he’s afraid of being
caught by my parents.

We
say goodbye, and I walk back into my house.
 
I want to get upstairs quickly to replay every single second
of tonight in the privacy of my bedroom, but my mom catches me.

She
stands at the staircase, blocking my way.
 
“Well.
 
Sebastian,
huh?”
 
She’s wearing a smile that
tells me she approves.
 
I know that
will change once she finds out his dad is in prison for killing a man.

“Yeah.
 
He’s great, mom.
 
I really like this guy.”
 
I’m smiling ear to ear, still glowing
from my night with him.

She
looks me up and down, and her smile fades.
 
“What the heck were you doing tonight?
 
That sweater is filthy!”

“We
went ice-blocking with Lexi and her boyfriend, Troy.”

“You’d
better get that sweater to the cleaners tomorrow.”

“I
will.
 
I’m going upstairs now.
 
I’m tired.”
 
I lie.
 
I just
want to get away from her.

My
mom ignores me and continues.
 
“Has
he been accepted to college yet?
 
Which one will he be attending?”

“I’m
not sure, mom,” I say honestly.
 
We’ve never talked about college.

“Well,
I’d like to spend more time getting to know that boy.
 
Remember, you’re going to the east coast next year, so don’t
get too serious about him.”

I
cringe at her words.
 
She has no
idea what I want.

And
what I want is never to be apart from Sebastian Veneto.
 

NICK

“Mijo,
you are so handsome!” My mom is fixing my hair and straightening my tie.
 
She comes around behind me, and we
stare into the hallway mirror together.
 
I hardly recognize myself.
 
I
actually have gel in my hair.
 
And
the only other time I’ve worn a suit was at my dad’s funeral.

My
mom gets tears in her eyes.
 
“Your
father would be so proud of you.”

I
turn and give her a quick hug.
 
“Mom, it’s just a school dance.”

“Your
first
school dance.”
 
She kisses my cheek.

The
doorbell rings, and we both look at each other for a moment before moving.
 
My mom stands casually at the kitchen
counter.
 
I walk to the front door
and pull it open.

Standing
in front of me is a vision of beauty.
 
My jaw actually drops open in shock.
 
I stand speechless, holding the door open, just staring at
her.

“Jesus,
Veneto.
 
Get it together.
 
Are you ready or what?”

Okay,
she still has her smartass mouth, but Candace looks incredible.
 
I break out of my trance and stutter,
“Candace.
 
You…you…just…wow.”

She
smiles, and I think she’s actually blushing.

My
mom pushes me out of the way and says merrily, “You must be Candace.
 
Please, come in, come in.
 
I want to take a few pictures of you
two.”

I
sigh and whisper to Candace, “Sorry.”

She
shrugs and follows my mom to the living room.
 
Candace is wearing a maroon, floor-length gown.
 
It’s strapless, and her bare shoulders
glisten with some kind of shimmering lotion or something.
 
She has her hair up in a twist with
wispy tendrils spiral curled around her face.
 
She’s gorgeous.

My
mom positions us by the fireplace.
 
“Get closer, Nicolás.
 
Don’t
look so tense.
 
Relax, you
two.”
 
She calls out instructions
while snapping away behind her camera.

“Okay,
mom,” I finally interrupt.
 
“We
have to go.
 
We’re going to be
late.”

She
smiles and comes over to hug me.
 
Then, she turns to Candace and hugs her too.
 
“You both look amazing.
 
Have fun tonight!”

We
walk toward the door.
 
“We will,
mom.
 
See you later.”

“Bye,
Mrs. Veneto,” Candace says.

We
walk to the Jetta and hop in.
 
We
decided to bypass dinner and just go to the dance.
 
Sebastian left about two hours ago.
 
I try not to think about him and Kendra
together, but for the last two hours I’ve been imagining what Kendra is wearing,
how beautiful she will be tonight, how my heart will literally explode when I
see her walk in on my cousin’s arm.
 
Maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

Candace
reads my emotions like she usually does.
 
“We’ll try not to hang out with them, okay?
 
I know it’s going to hurt, but just try to have fun anyway.”

I
appreciate Candace.
 
She seems to
get me like no one else does.
 
“I’m
actually glad we are going to this thing together.
 
Thanks, Candace.”

She
giggles.
 
“
You
asked
me
,
remember?
 
If it were my choice,
I’d be at home watching the Walking Dead right now.”

“I
know.”
 
I laugh too.
 
“Are you sure you don’t want to stop by
Yogurtland for a quick dinner before the dance?”

“Ha!
 
I went already.
 
Showed up in my dress and
everything.
 
It was great.”

Our
conversation is light, and it keeps my mind from dwelling on Kendra and
Sebastian.
 
And since talking with
the lawyer the other night, my mind has been a little more at ease about the
lawsuit.
 
He said most likely our
home insurance would pay whatever is owed.
 
Sure, our monthly premiums will probably go up, but at least
it’s not three hundred grand out of our pocket.
 
I’m prepared to relax and actually enjoy this night as much
as possible.

When
we pull up to the school, the parking lot is packed.
 
We find a spot in the far lot and start walking toward the
gym.
 
After waiting in line for five
minutes, we enter the dance.
 
The
gym has been transformed into an ocean-themed ballroom.
 
There are blue and teal balloons
hanging from the ceiling.
 
Light
blue butcher paper with painted white clouds line the walls.
 
There are large spotlights in each
corner of the room, facing the center dance floor.
 
A disco ball hangs from the ceiling, casting thousands of
tiny white lights across the floor.

“Wow,
this is incredible.” Candace is scanning the room, taking in the décor.

“Yeah.
 
They should leave it like this all the
time.
 
Maybe I’d go to more
basketball games.”

Candace
elbows me and laughs.
 
“You wanna
get some juice?”

“Sure,”
I say.

When
we’re at the refreshment table, my eyes wander to the door.
 
I’ve already scanned the entire room
searching for her.
 
They’re not
here yet, so I expect them to walk through the door at any moment.

Candace
catches me.
 
“I don’t think they’re
here yet,” she says.

My
eyes lower.
 
“Yeah, I don’t think
so either.”

We
spend the next thirty minutes mingling.
 
Neither of us really mingles, so we congregate to where Raj and Dylan
are sitting at a table near the dance floor with their dates, watching people
dance.
 
The music is too loud to
have any kind of normal conversation, so we all just sit around the table,
occasionally yelling something at each other.

My
eyes drift to the door again at just the right time.
 
Sebastian and Kendra are walking through the entrance
together, arm in arm.
 
The music
blurs and fades away and the other students disappear into my periphery.
 
All I can see is Kendra.

She
smiles as she enters, waving to someone.
 
She’s wearing a short, eggplant dress that shows off her long legs and
reveals her cleavage.
 
Her hair is
hanging in spiral curls and is pulled up on one side with a sparkly hair
clip.
 
Her lips are stained in a
dark red that makes me want to kiss her until it hurts.

My
eyes move to my cousin.
 
He curls
his arm around her waist as they walk in, claiming her as his.
 
He’s dressed in a fitted black suit,
with a black shirt and a purple tie that matches Kendra’s dress.
 
When my eyes see Kendra again, she’s
smiling, happy.
 
I want to die.

How
in the world did I think I could handle this?
 
This is like self-mutilation, like locking myself into a gas
chamber, like biting off my own foot.
 
Torture.
 
I squirm in my
seat uneasily.
 
I want to get out
of here.
 
What the hell am I even
doing at this dance?

“Veneto!”
I hear over the music.
 
I turn to
Candace, who has also seen Kendra and Sebastian enter and is trying to get my
attention.
 
When I look at her, she
nods toward the dance floor.
 
“Dance with me!”

Is
she serious?
 
I totally do not
dance.
 
There’s a slow song on
right now.
 
All I have to do is
sway back and forth, right?
 
I can
do that.
 
I need to do that.
 
I need to do something to get out of my
head right now.

I
stand up and grab Candace’s hand.
 
“Okay.
 
Let’s dance.”

She
looks shocked.
 
I’m kind of shocked
myself.
 
We walk to the dance floor
and blend in with a hundred other kids already swaying to the beat.
 
I wrap my arms around Candace’s waist,
and she clasps her hands behind my neck.
 
We start moving to the music.

She
asks carefully, “Are you okay?”

I
nod and take a deep breath, then fake a smile.
 
“Yep.
 
Totally
okay.”

“You’re
a liar.”
 
She grins.
 
“I know this is killing you.”

“What?
 
The fact that I’m at a school
dance?
 
Or that I’m actually
dancing?
 
Or that my cousin just
walked in with the girl I love?”

“All
of the above.
 
I’m proud of you,
you know.
 
You can’t just stop
living your life because of them.”

“I
know.
 
I’m actually happy to be
here with you.
 
You look amazing,
by the way.
 
Like absolutely freaking
beautiful.”

She
drops her eyes, embarrassed.
 
“Shut
up.”

“I’m
serious.”

She
giggles.
 
“Well, you clean up
pretty nicely yourself.
 
I never
thought I’d see you in a suit.
 
Even if you are still wearing your dirty Converse.”

“Hey,
they’re the most comfortable shoes I own.”

“They
look fine.
 
You look really great,
Nick.
 
Thanks for asking me to come
tonight.
 
I’m having fun.”

“If
it starts sucking too bad, we can just go back to your house and watch the
Walking Dead.”

She
laughs.
 
“That’s exactly what I was
thinking.”

The
slow song is ending when I feel a tap on my shoulder.

I
turn around and freeze when I see Kendra standing in front of me.
 
“Kendra.”
 
It comes out as a whisper, getting lost in the crowd.

She
gives Candace a hug.
 
“I didn’t
know you guys were coming together.
 
You are so beautiful!” she says.

Candace
pulls back from her and smiles.
 
“So are you!
 
I love that
dress.”

“Thank
you,” she says, twirling back and forth to make her skirt move in the light.

Candace’s
eyes go back and forth from Kendra to me.
 
Finally, she says, “I’m going to get a drink.
 
I’ll be right back.”
 
She skips away, leaving Kendra and me on the dance floor.
 
Another slow song starts.
 
She raises an eyebrow, and I know she’s
wondering if I want to dance with her.
 

Hell yes.

I
wrap my arms around her tiny waist.
 
Her hands come up around my neck.
 
There’s a healthy space between our bodies that I would love to close, but
I know I might offend her if I do.
 
She’s with my cousin.

“Kendra,
you are stunning.
 
You always
are.”
 
I say it softly, but I think
she hears me anyway.

She
smiles and leans up on her tiptoes toward my ear.
 
I lower my head, and she whispers, “I hardly recognized you
with your hair slicked back.
 
I can
see your face.”
 
She leans back and
looks at me, her eyes wandering over my face.
 
“You’re gorgeous.”

I
smile at her words.
 
Why can’t she
be mine?
 
Can’t she see how much I
love her?
 
Can’t she see how much I
would cherish her?
 
The feel of her
in my arms is bittersweet.
 
I never
want to let her go, but I know I can’t hold onto her.
 
She’s not mine.

I’m
lost in her eyes, lost in my surroundings, lost in the closeness of her.
 
The spell breaks when I hear my cousin’s
voice.