Waiting for You (17 page)

The
drive over to Aidan’s filled
Karise
with a mixture of
apprehension
and excitement. There was an appeal to immersing herself in his world
for three days. There was also a certain amount of terror attached to it.
What if she royally botched this whole kid-house-farm-sitting thing? It was a very real possibility, considering she had zero experience in all three areas.

Karise managed to tamp down the panic long enough to pick up
Aidan and Zoe for the trip to the airport. She hung back while Zoe said
her goodbyes to her dad. When it was Karise’s turn, she gave him a
quick kiss and a very long hug. The rational part of her knew it was
only a few days. The irrational part of her was screaming at her to hold
on tighter. It was a new experience for her – having someone in her life whose absence made her feel like part of her was missing.

And then he was gone, leaving her alone with Zoe, who she now
eyed apprehensively. Sure, she’d spent countless hours with her over
the last few months. But now that it was just the two of them, the weight
of the encounter shifted dramatically. Karise took a deep breath and gave herself a quick mental pep talk, sounding almost like a normal
human being by the time she asked, “So, what’s first on our agenda?”

“I’m hungry.”

“Your dad didn’t feed you breakfast?”

“He was busy.”

Fair enough
, Karise told herself. “Okay, how about we grab some breakfast before we head home?”

“Daddy doesn’t like me eating out. He says the food is crap.”

“Are you allowed to say that word?”

Zoe shuffled her feet, the action telling Karise the answer was no.

“I don’t think
eating
out just this once will hurt us.” Karise’s outward
response was much different from her inward,
What the heck am I going
to feed this kid, and just how many times a day do they eat?

“Okay…” Zoe drew the word out in a way that clearly said she
wasn’t buying it. She didn’t argue, though, and Karise wasn’t in the
mood to debate, either. Instead, she drove them to a local breakfast
nook and got them each a short stack of pancakes with an orange juice
for Zoe and a coffee for herself.

Zoe gave her glass a look of horror. “This orange juice has strings in it.”

“That’s called pulp.”

“It’s gross.”

Karise sucked in her breath, holding it until she trusted what might
come out of her mouth next. “Okay, I’ll drink the orange juice. Do you
like apple juice?”

Zoe nodded and went back to coloring her children’s menu. Karise
ordered them an apple juice, all the while wondering what happened
to the charming child she’d come to know. After breakfast, they swung
by Kate’s house to check on the construction progress. It was Sunday
,
so the jobsite was quiet. Karise didn’t really need to approve the purchase
orders that day, but she picked them up anyway – mostly for something
to do on the way back to Aidan’s. She was suddenly hesitant to be alone
with Zoe all day at the house.

Once in the car, she glanced in her rearview mirror to double-
check that Zoe was strapped in before leaving. She could see herself forgetting to do that.

“We missed church,” Zoe informed her pertly.

“Right. Church. I’m sorry.” Karise wished Aidan had made out a list or a schedule for her. “Is it too late to go now?”

Zoe gave her a look that made Karise feel like an idiot for asking.
The rest of the ride home was quiet while Karise wondered how to get
them back on track.

“Do you want to go for a walk when we get home?” Karise tried hopefully.

“Nah.” Zoe didn’t look up.

Oh boy
. Karise glanced at the clock, wondering if it was too soon to call Aidan. When they got back to the house, Zoe went to play in
her room, leaving Karise to wonder what she’d done to alienate the girl.
She idled away the afternoon by sifting through POs and sketching out
ideas for Aidan’s house remodel. Clyde kept her company, the weight
of his massive head on her feet reassuring her that someone in the
house still liked her.

When
she couldn’t stand
being
trapped in her own head any longer,
Karise tossed her sketchpad aside and went to Zoe’s room. She looked
up from her dolls, barely acknowledging Karise before going back to her imaginary world.

“Can I play?” Karise ventured into the room.

Zoe shrugged.

“You have a lovely room.” Karise looked around; the walls were covered with pictures of fairies. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in here before.”

Zoe’s brow crinkled, making Karise think she might have stumbled
onto something.

“I like fairies, too.”

“They’re pixies.”

“Right, like the ones who live in the tree at the edge of the poppy
field. They’re so beautiful.” Karise reached a hand up to run her fingers
along one of the delicate figurines sitting on a shelf.

“So? You’re going to take them away.”

“What? Honey, I’m not going to take your pixies away.”

“You’re going to
change
my room. You’re g
oin
g to
change
everything
.”
Zoe’s voice was soft but laced with resentment.

Karise realized she’d stumbled across the reason for Zoe’s sudden
shift
in
attitude
. She
tentatively
sat on the edge of the bed. “Oh,
sweetheart
.
I don’t want to change everything.”

“But you do. Daddy wasn’t gone all the time before you came along.
Now Daddy said you’re going to change our house.”

“Your dad is gone because of his work, and hopefully this will be
the last trip for a while. I should have thanked you sooner for letting me
borrow him when my mom died. Having him there made me less sad.”

“I don’t know my mom, either.” Zoe seemed to momentarily forget
her anger at Karise.

“She doesn’t know what she’s missing. You’re a delightful young
woman.”

Zoe looked up at Karise, her face plainly saying she was deciding
whether to let go of her ire.

“You know, Zoe,” Karise began hesitantly, “your dad came to
me about the house thing. Have you told him you don’t want him to change it?”

Zoe shook her head.

“Is it okay if I tell him?”

Hope sprang to Zoe’s face as she nodded.

“Maybe we can work out a compromise, a way for both of you to be happy.”

“Okay.” Zoe handed one of the pixie dolls in her hand to Karise. “You can stay and play for a while if you want.”

Karise beamed at the little girl. “I’d enjoy that very much.”

Several awkward moments later, Zoe called a halt to the game,
eyeing Karise speculatively and declaring, “You aren’t very good at
this, are you?”

“No, no I’m not. Sorry.”

“That’s okay.” Zoe giggled then grew serious. “Are you ready to marry my daddy yet?”

Karise choked. “What? What brought that on?”

“You told me you weren’t ready to marry anyone. Are you now?”

Karise thought back to the first time she’d met Zoe. She remembered
that conversation. Somehow the idea of marrying Aidan didn’t seem so
farfetched now, but the topic hadn’t come up. Truthfully, she was glad
it hadn’t. She couldn’t imagine a life without him, but she also wasn’t
ready to make such a big decision. She wanted to feel more comfortable
in her own skin before she promised to share her life with anyone.

“Well, are you?” Zoe was growing impatient for an answer.

Karise spoke very carefully. “Your dad and I haven’t talked about
getting married, sweetheart. We really like each other, but I don’t know
that either of us is ready for such a big step.”

“I don’t know.”
Zoe
seemed s
keptical
. “I think my daddy loves you.”

Karise’s heart soared. She debated for a moment before leaning in
and lowering her voice. “Can I tell you a secret?”

Zoe nodded eagerly, leaning toward Karise.

“I think I love your daddy.”

“I knew it!” Zoe clapped triumphantly.

“But,” Karise held up a hand, “That doesn’t mean we’re ready for
marriage. That takes time. Maybe we’ll never get married, but I can tell
you that I will always care for you and your dad very much, no matter
what happens.”

Zoe nodded, considering Karise’s words.

Karise could hear her phone ringing in the living room. She jumped
up, calling to Zoe as she went. “That could be your dad.”

She nearly melted with relief at the sound of Aidan’s voice. “How
was your flight?”

“Long, at least it felt that way with a 10-year-old kicking the back
of my seat the whole way.” He sounded tired. “How was church?”

“Yeah, about that…” Karise sighed. “I totally forgot about church.
I’m a terrible person, I know, but is there any way I could get a schedule
or at least some helpful hints from you?”

Aidan chuckled. “What about the note I left on the fridge?”

“There is no note on the fridge.” Karise went to check again. “Nope,
nothing here.”

“Check under the counter. Sometimes Clyde knocks things down
with his tail.”

Karise got down on all fours and peeked under the counter. “Nope,
not there either.”

“Really? I know I wrote everything down. Oh, wait. Crap. Here it i
s. I’m so sorry – I packed it.”

Karise sat on the floor with her back against the counter and smiled.
“I’m just glad I’m not the crazy one.”

“Do you want to grab a pen and paper or do you want me to email
this to you?”

“We’ll do it the old fashioned way. Just give me a second to find something to write with.”

“Try the drawer under the microwave,” he suggested.

A moment later, Karise was back in her spot on the floor, this time
with pen and paper in hand. “Alright, go for it.”

Aidan rattled off enough instructions to make her head spin – the
most intimidating of which was that Joe got Sundays off, so it was up
to Karise to feed and put away the goats that evening.

After he finished relaying instructions, they talked about their days.
Karise wasn’t sure how to broach the topic of her conversation with
Zoe. She needed more time to process everything before she ventured
into those waters. Besides, maybe that was a talk best had in person.

Zoe was thrilled to hear her daddy’s voice. Karise couldn’t blame
her. Talking to him almost made her miss him more. She cringed when
she heard Zoe relay that they hadn’t eaten lunch. When she had him on the phone, Karise promised they’d eat an early dinner. “I will get the hang of this.”

“You’re doing a great job. Zoe sounds happy; the rest will work itself out,” he reassured her.

“Thank you. Have a good trip and tell us all about it when you get back.”

Zoe was waiting for Karise when she got off the phone. “Did you tell him about the house?”

“Not yet.”

“I knew it.” Zoe narrowed her eyes.

“Give me a day or two. I’m working something out.”

“Okay.” Zoe’s voice didn’t ring with confidence.

“I will! Hey, should I feed you or the goats first?”

“Me.” Zoe didn’t miss a beat.

Karise nodded and went to open the refrigerator. It didn’t offer much, so she checked the freezer. When she came up empty there, she moved on to the pantry. “Where’s all the food?”

“There.” Zoe looked at her like she was crazy.

“That’s not food. Those are ingredients.”

“Daddy turns that into food.”

“Of course he does.” Karise sighed.

“You’re not very good at this, either, are you?” Zoe propped her chin on her hands and watched Karise with interest.

“Apparently not.” Karise pulled out her phone and started looking
for the nearest takeout.

KARISE WAS WELCOMED
back from picking up takeout by the
plaintive sound of hungry goats. Even before she got out of the car, she
could tell they were not happy with her. Ignoring Zoe’s admonishment
for being late for evening feed, Karise unfastened the girl from her car seat and sat her at the picnic table with her dinner.

“Go ahead and start eating, sweetie. I’ll go get the goats in and I’ll be right back to join you, okay?”

Zoe giggled, making Karise wonder if she knew something Karise
didn’t. She found the written instructions pinned to a bulletin board
in the barn, as promised. Feed had been pre-measured and clearly
marked, making the process slightly less overwhelming. Per the
instructions, Karise opened the gate to let the goats into the barn then
turned to put the feed in the trough.

This isn’t so bad
, she thought a split second before the first set of hooves hit her behind. They were quickly followed by several more as a dozen goats of varying sizes climbed her trying to reach the feed she now held above her head.