Waken (The Woods of Everod Book 1) (2 page)

Pushing those thoughts to the back of my mind, I shoved a bottle of sunscreen into my backpack. After tossing and turning all night, I’d managed to build the hike up until I was ready to explode, well, implode would probably be more like me. Justin hadn’t helped my anxiety.

Fitting in never happened for me no matter how much I wanted to. Friendships just weren’t for me. I avoided emotional pain like the plague and hat was easier when I didn’t let anyone close enough to even try. For a moment, I tried to think like Tim and Justin. Maybe this was my chance to do something different. Something not so safe. I could do it. Maybe.

The guy at the library flirted with my thoughts. As crazy as my nightmares and daydreams were, I was sane enough to realize my reaction to him was overblown. If I had a do over, I would’ve just stayed in my corner. That would have attracted a lot less attention.

“Janie!” Tim’s voice sounded from the kitchen, interrupting what would have been a well deserved self-lashing. “Are you up yet?”

I had about thirty seconds before he headed towards my room. Apart from giving birth to me, the only favor Elin did me was marrying Tim. Elin married Tim when I was ten, after a long succession of transitory boyfriends who walked through the rapidly revolving door that served as the entrance to our house. When she walked out that same door six months later, Tim stayed for me. He’d fought for me. Everything he’d done since she left had been to make a better future for us. Somehow, God had sent Tim and Justin my way, probably to make up for the crappy hand I’d been dealt in the biological parent department.

I swung open the door and the stench of burning eggs told me Tim was attempting to cook breakfast again. I don’t know why he bothered. He’d never figured out how to cook more than toast and frozen pizza. On my way down the hall, I pulled on my Canucks hoodie, a gift from Tim, knowing if I didn’t hurry, Justin would take off without me. And there was no way he was winning this bet that easily.

“Good morning, sunshine!” Tim’s natural optimism was especially glaring, probably thinking I was going to start complaining. In case he caught sight of me, I spread my mouth across my face and hoped it looked more like a smile than a grimace.

“Morning,” I mumbled between my clenched teeth, heading for the door and hoping in vain for a quick escape. Justin was already starting his car.

“Hey!” Tim called as I reached the door. My hand already twisting the knob, I turned back. His shiny bald head stuck out of the kitchen doorway and into the hall. His face glowed with expectancy. “Don’t you want breakfast? I made your favorite – scrambled eggs.”

I almost laughed at him. Yeah, I loved scrambled eggs, just not
his
scrambled eggs.

“I’m not really hungry.”

Tim raised one of his eyebrows. It was a quirk I’d spent years trying to emulate, but never managed more than a scrunched up face that looked like I was going spastic.

“Plus, Justin’s going to take off without me if I don’t go,” I said, desperate to escape the nauseating odor.

He sighed deeply, and I felt the knot of guilt tightening in my stomach. “I know you don’t like living here, Janie, but it’s only for a few months. Then if you’re still unhappy, you can go back to Dallas. Just try to give the people here a chance.”

Try. Didn’t he realize I did? I tried to act normal, but it just didn’t come natural even in the best of places. His spontaneous decision to move to Elin’s hometown wasn’t helping matters.

With a parting smile, at least I hoped it passed as a smile; I turned, ran out the door, and down the rickety porch steps.

Justin revved the engine of his ‘93 Camry. To call it white would be generous. It was more of a camel shade, with rust patches growing along the wheel wells, but it worked and that was better than nothing. He’d spent his time after school last year working, while I’d spent it reading. Now I was stuck begging rides, unless I wanted to walk everywhere.

“Let’s go, little girl!” he yelled through his open window. He laid on the horn, gesturing impatiently for me to get in. Blonde highlights shone in the morning light as he stuck his head out the window. “Come on! We have to follow them up to the hiking trail, so move your butt or we’re gonna miss them.”

The All-American boy next-door. Yeah, right. If he hadn’t been my stepbrother, I might have found him cute, but after living with him for seven years, he just plain got on my nerves. We knew each other as well as any brother and sister, meaning that above all else, we knew how to push each other’s buttons. As much as I loved him now, he’d known how to drive me up the wall from day one. Today was no exception.

I got in the car and yanked on my stiff seat belt, jamming it in to the buckle.

“Morning,” he said with a wide smile.

“Yeah,” I grunted in response. I still resented the way he could wake up early and be so cheery.

His plugged his iPhone into an FM transmitter and turned the volume up so the speakers vibrated at full blast, adding to my grumpiness, but I didn’t want to push my luck. He would stop and dump me out if I dared to complain about
his
music in
his
car.

When Justin began to sing off-key loudly, I shot him a dirty look. “Please?”

“I’m sorry, is my music bothering you?” He smirked. A feeling of dread filled me. He wasn’t going to play nice this morning. Maybe he was worried that I’d actually manage to make a friend and he’d be left driving me around for the summer.

It was weird for us when Tim and my mom got married, two ten-year-olds at opposite ends of the personality spectrum. Justin adapted quickly, like he does with everything. For him life stayed pretty much the same except a quiet little girl stared at him from the shadows. His outgoing personality and vivacious attitude towards life, so contradictory to my own, captivated me.

The car jerked to a stop as Justin pulled into the library parking lot behind an old jeep.

“I thought we were going hiking?” I asked.

“Yeah, but I guess it’s a hard trail to find. We’re gonna follow some of them up there.”

He waved to a couple girls as they hopped into their ride. The parking lot was full of people. Two weeks ago, heck, two days ago I would have sunk into my seat. Now I was preparing to thrust myself into their midst. I closed my eyes, and pictured how glorious the view would be at the top, only to have the guy from the library pop into the picture. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Yeah, right. If my reaction to him was anything to go by, I was doomed to humiliate myself in front of half the town.

We followed the convoy of cars, curving through the mountains until we turned onto a dirt road. The suddenly bumpy road disrupted Justin’s grin. An ancient economy car wasn’t the best choice of transportation up a mountainside.

Everod, Colorado hadn’t been my idea of a grand plan. Almost a month ago, Tim packed us up and we moved to the middle of nowhere, forty minutes from the closest town, Telluride, which didn’t say much. Tim thought nothing of moving. Since Elin left, we’d moved countless times. I think part of him was searching for her, hoping that with each new city he’d spot her in a crowd.

Maybe that’s why we finally ended up here. This was her town. This was where she’d lived in the years before she had me and the only place she’d ever stayed for longer than a few months. It was where her mother had lived. Tim probably thought she’d come back here some day. I’m pretty sure he was also holding out the hope that if I connected with her roots I’d come to forgive her for leaving like she had. I couldn’t tell him that her leaving was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Bouncing around, my hand gripped the panic handle, white knuckled. We rounded a bend and saw a small parking area already lined with a handful of vehicles. Justin pulled up and I slid down in my seat. People wandered over to greet him as he got out. Doubts engulfed me. I wanted to crawl into the back seat and huddle behind my book. Cooking wasn’t so bad. I could handle it for a month.

A knock on the window refocused my attention. Justin stood there, his eyebrows raised in question.

“Relax. They won’t bite,” I muttered to myself as I reluctantly climbed out of the car. I didn’t go far, just leaned against the door, hunched over with my arms wrapped around myself. It was a position Elin had taught me well. I straightened up and banished all thoughts of her. Justin was preparing to throw me to the wolves this morning and I needed to be ready. Sixty-seven days. I could make it.

From my spot by the car, I could see Justin’s new gang of friends perfectly. Justin strutted along, a girl on either side, with another couple behind clamoring to take their place if one should fall off. I could almost see them elbowing each other in a vain attempt to move up.

Poor Justin. No, scratch that. Poor girls. I watched him work the crowd, but didn’t bother trying to hear what crazy story he told them. His tales usually wound a tight path around the reality of the story, twisting with embellishments.

A car pulled up beside me and I moved out of the way, going around to the front of the car. The driver stepped out. I froze when I saw who stood there – the guy from the library. He looked as gorgeous as I remembered. His brown hair, a mix of dark and light streaks, bordered on being too shaggy. He was shorter than I’d guessed, maybe a few inches shy of six feet, but he had a solid frame with broad shoulders that made him look larger. He walked over to the group of guys and joined in on their conversation.

From the other side of the car a girl stepped out. Her hair flowed softly around her, and she smiled, showing off her perfect teeth like a living magazine cover. She waved her fingers at some friends, heading towards them.

“Janie... Janie!” Justin’s voice penetrated my thoughts and I realized that he and everyone around him were staring at me. Mild curiosity filled their eyes and I smiled weakly. “Come here.”

So, this was how it was going to be. He wanted to push me to the edge of our deal until I surrendered. Well, he was shit out of luck on that. I forced my feet to move toward them, with each step ignoring the quivers of my muscles, the clenching of my stomach screaming at me to run and hide.

Justin ran through introductions, but the thundering of my heart drowned out their names. I nodded numbly and stared at the ground wishing I had been smart enough to stay home. Then Justin got to
him
. Tristan. His name was Tristan and it fit him perfectly. This close I could see his eyes were a startling crystal blue. Humor gave them a twinkle and I wondered if he was thinking of my wild dash through the library.

At my lack of response, the group dismissed me as irrelevant and moved towards the path. Relief pulsed through me. There was a chance I’d make it through the day unscathed. I trailed behind them, giving myself plenty of space. Towering pine and aspen trees lined the path. Through the shadows of their presence, wildlife surrounded us, deer and squirrels scattering as we came near. I took another step along the trail, my gaze fixed on a squirrel, when I ran face first into a cushy wall.

I bounced back, the weight of my pack providing the momentum to carry me down to the ground. My nose throbbed.
Please don’t be broken. Please don’t be broken!
With a hope that the chanted plea would make it true, I looked at my hand - no blood and the burning sensation was fading. Definitely a good sign.

“Sorry! I wasn’t looking where I was going.” My hand muffled my words.

“It’s okay.”

Standing, I looked at the human wall that had fallen victim to my wandering mind. She towered a good six inches over my own five-foot-two frame. She’d been the one to arrive with Tristan.

She carefully looked at me rubbing my nose, an obvious attempt to figure out if she should know me from somewhere other than the parking lot this morning. “Have we met before? You look so familiar.”

“Um, no. Janie Moore, Justin’s stepsister.”

“I’m Rachel Hogan. So, did you just move in with Justin and your dad?” She started walking and I just followed along, unsure how to walk away while she was still talking to me.

“Umm, no, I’ve been here a couple weeks.”

“Wow, I can’t believe I haven’t seen you around town!”

“I’m kind of a homebody.”

“Oh.” She was struggling to find something to talk about. I wanted to tell her that I’d rather not talk at all, but I couldn’t seem to work up the courage. “So, where’re you from?”

“New York,” I answered, naming the last place we’d lived.

“Oh, I am so jealous! I’d love to live in New York! Well, I’d love to live anywhere with some decent shopping!” She had a tinkling laugh.

“Have you always lived here?” I asked.

“Yeah, but I’m so outta here next year. I’m already planning my move to L.A.!” Her words were passionate, but a dull glaze screened her green eyes.

Rachel talked nonstop as we headed up the trail. I wondered how it would take her to figure out that nobody talked to me. How soon would she realize I wasn’t really interested in talking with her? I listened to her animated chatter and strived to really hear what she was saying, but my mind was racing with possible ways to murder Justin without getting caught.

“So how do you like Everod?”

Jolted by the change of conversation, I scrambled to comprehend her question and form a reply. “It’s…quaint.”