Wanted (11 page)

“You don't look happy, you look sad.”

“I'm happy. I promise.”

Reassured, Mary said, “You know so much and are so pretty, I like being around you. I like learning to quilt.” She rushed on. “You cook a lot of good food, too. I know my
daed
likes it.”

Katie felt a rush of pleasure. “How do you know?”

“Sometimes he comes home early to eat dinner with us. He used to never do that. Now, though, he acts like he's waiting on you.” Mary raised a brow. “Did you make him do that? Make him join us for dinner?”

“No. But I am glad he comes in. My family eats together every evening.”

“Even with all those people there?”

“Especially with all those people there. Like the Lord, our loved ones need some special time carved out.”

Mary sipped her tea as she continued to stare at Katie thoughtfully. “Hannah seems happier, too. She used to cry a whole lot more.”

Katie almost asked what was the source of Hannah's tears, but for the first time in a long while, she bit back her impulse and sought patience instead. “I'm glad Hannah is not crying so much.”

“Me, too. There was no way I could make things better. My mother is gone to the angels.”

“Yes, she is.”

Eyes wide, Mary whispered, “Why do you think God took her from us so early? We all ride in buggies. Why did she get hurt and no one else?”

“I don't know.”

Mary slumped. “I guess I'll have to ask when I get to heaven.”

That made Katie smile. “I don't know if our eternity goes that way. I would think it would be mighty time-consuming for our Lord to sit and answer questions.”

“I'm not going to take up too much time. I just want to know why.”

“Put that way, I suppose it's a reasonable request.”

Their tea was almost done. Staring at the scant bits of tea that had seeped through the wire mesh and sunk to the bottom of her mug, Katie said, “We should probably be getting to bed now. It's near three in the morning. Are you more tired?”

As if on cue, Mary stifled a yawn. “No.”

“Something tells me that might not quite be true.”

In a rush, Mary blurted, “What if you wanted to stay longer? What if we wanted you to? If we were to ask you to? Would you do that?”

To her surprise, Katie didn't know the answer to that. Would she want to stay with Mary and Hannah out of duty? To stay only as someone who could look after the house? “The answer to that would depend on your aunt and father. Remember, we don't know what is going to happen with Winnie.”

“She might move to Indiana.”

“But she might not. She went out there to get to know Malcolm, and to get to know his family. Not to make plans.”

“But what about you? If my father said you could stay here with us, what would you say?”

There was the question. A few months ago, Katie would have thought she'd do anything to attract Jonathan's regard. During her first few days at the Lundys', when she was so sad and lonely, she would have said she couldn't wait to return home. Now, though, she wasn't sure what the future had in store for her.

“I don't know,” Katie finally murmured. “But I will tell you this: it is better to not always think about the what-ifs in life. If you give yourself to the Lord, then He will make clear all the hard decisions, and we won't have to worry about so much. Remember, the future is in God's hands, not ours.”

Mary scowled as they set their mugs in the sink and started up the stairs. “When do you get to be old enough to have your future in your own hands?”

Instead of reminding her again of the Lord's will, Katie chuckled. “You, Mary, remind me of myself. So impatient.”

“Really?”

“Really.” Cupping Mary's shoulder as she paused, Katie added, “I have always been in a hurry. I used to shame my mother with my impulsiveness. I got into trouble a time or two at school as well.”

“I didn't know that.”

“That's because we don't know each other well. Maybe soon we will.”

There'd been a time when Katie had felt that she was in control of everything. Now she was smarter and stronger. Now she realized that she wasn't in control of anything. Her future felt as slippery as ever. “But, to answer your question, I don't know if we ever get old enough. Our
future is in the Lord's hands. It's best to remember that, don'tcha think?”

“Maybe.”

Katie reached the landing and turned to Mary. “It's time we slept. Morning will come even if we're not quite ready to greet it.”

Mary nodded solemnly, then to Katie's surprise, reached out and wrapped her arms around her.

Automatically, Katie hugged her back. The little girl's arms felt wonderful wrapped around her waist. Bending down, she pressed a kiss on her head. Yes, the Lord did work in mysterious ways.

 

“Ready for the weekend, Jonathan?” Brent called out at five o'clock on Friday, just as Jonathan was slipping on his coat and gloves. “I feel like it's been the longest week imaginable.”

“It has been tiring, for sure,” Jonathan said as he waited for his boss to approach. “But we did get all the frames made for the builder's contract. That is something to be praised.”

Brent chuckled. “For a while there, I didn't think it was going to get done. I sure appreciate your team staying late on Wednesday night.”

“I always appreciate the overtime. Plus, things are crazy at my house. I didn't mind escaping things for a bit.”

“Why are things crazy? Because Winnie's gone?”

“Yes, but that's not all. We are hosting church this weekend.”

“Already?”

Jonathan appreciated how Brent took the time to get to know their ways. “
Jah
, it's been a year since we hosted last. It just feels like it happens more quickly.”

Brent slapped Jonathan's shoulder. “Best of luck with that. I have some time tomorrow, do you need help unloading the benches?”

“Eli and Henry are coming to help. But I thank you just the same.”

“Well, good luck. I'm going home with my fingers crossed. What do you think my chances are that Tricia has dinner ready?”

Jonathan chuckled. “Slim to none.” Brent's wife was a teacher. It was standard practice for Brent to take her out on Friday nights. “You best plan to get gussied up and take her out. She'll be mighty pleased with that suggestion.”

“Spoken like a man who's been married before,” Brent said with a grin. “I'll definitely take her out. See you Monday, Jon.”

Jonathan waved him off. As he watched Brent practically scamper to his car, he tried to recall the last time he'd eagerly run home. He couldn't remember.

Oh, he loved his girls, and he was always eager to spend time with them, but that wasn't the feeling he longed to experience.

But moments later, as he and Blacky were making their way home, Jonathan found himself thinking of Katie once again. Perhaps she'd made pork chops or a roast. Katie was a mighty fine cook.

But her skills in the kitchen were not what he kept thinking about. No, it was her sunny nature. The way she smiled tenderly at Hannah.

The way she greeted him when he walked in the door—just like he was worth waiting for. With that in mind, he found himself spurring Blacky on. He'd been waiting all day to see her, as well.

“I don't know if I'll ever be able to move again,” Katie moaned as she finally sat down at the kitchen table after a number of the folks had left Jonathan's home from the church service. “Every bone in my body aches. Jonathan, try not to trip over me tomorrow morning when you wake up.”

“I canna promise you that. The way you are sprawled out, why it would make a man have a difficult time getting around you.”

With effort, Katie pulled a foot in so it rested under the table. “Better?”

Jonathan pretended to have a difficult time squeezing through the opening. “Only a bit,” he said, sucking in his stomach comically.

Katie couldn't help but notice that he didn't have much of a stomach to tuck in. No, Jonathan Lundy was all solid
muscle, and that was the truth. But no matter how attractive she found him, there was certainly no way she could let him—or anyone else in the room—see that. “How's this?” she asked, pulling in her chair a bit more. But in her soreness, the feet of the chair only moved an inch or so in.

He took things into his own hands and merely pushed the chair forward, then walked around her easily. “This is much better, now.”

As everyone around her chuckled, Katie did her best to not let everyone see how drawn to Jonathan she was.

When she'd first arrived, he'd seemed terribly aware of her, yet emotionally distant. But things had changed during the last two weeks. Little by little, he'd unbent enough for Katie to see glimpses of the warm person underneath the distant manner. This playful attitude drew her to him even more than his handsome looks.

Blissfully unaware of her feelings, Jonathan walked passed her and joked some more. “If I would've known a simple church service was going to wear you out, I would've asked for more help.”

“I did just fine.”

The laughter in the room rose again. “He has you there, Katie,” her mother said, her voice merry. “If you complain much more, we'll all think preparing for services was too big a job for you. You might have to get up, after all.”

“
Jah
. Otherwise, you will be covered in footprints.” With a wink toward Anna,
Daed
said, “And you would dirty your new dress.”

Katie sat up and smiled at her father. “Well, I certainly don't want that to happen.” With only a bit of a wince, she stood up and faced her family. “I can't believe how worried I was about today.
Mamm
, even though I helped you prepare the house for church many a time, I never fully understood why you would get so short-tempered with us just hours before everyone was due to arrive. Now I know.”

“I was never short-tempered.”

Henry folded his arms across his chest. “No,
Daed
always spent most of his time in the barn during preparations for no reason at all.”

“Well, maybe I was a bit cross.”

“Only a bit, Irene,” Katie's father said with a smile.

Jonathan perked up. “I think Katie did a fine job. We had a lot of people here, and everyone enjoyed both the worship and the luncheon. Our house looked neat and shiny clean, as well. You did all of us proud, Katie.”

Katie beamed at the praise. Though she felt as if she could sleep for a week, she also was terribly pleased with how well everything turned out. Of course, none of it could have gone so well if not for the many hands that worked together. Over the last three days, the Lundy home had been full of women helping to clean the kitchen, prepare the meal, and help tend to the walkway. Cabinets shone and the oak floor gleamed.

“
Danke
, Jonathan, but we know it took many people to make today a success.” Looking around the room, she added, “I know I would have burst into tears yesterday if
not for knowing that all of you were working by my side.”

“Hosting one hundred fifty people is a lot, no matter how prepared you are. I, for one, am glad that we will not be hosting next,” her mother said.

“Me, too. I was so nervous about making sure everything was perfect that I thought I was going to get sick,” blurted Anna. Then, as she realized how she sounded, she looked around the room. “I hope that's okay to admit?”

“Only among family and friends,” Eli teased. He rocked back on his heels. “And speaking of family, I think I'd best get going. I promised my nephews I'd play basketball with them later.”

As he walked to the door, Eli scanned the group of them again. “It's just a shame that Winnie wasn't here, you know? It didn't feel the same.”

As the door shut behind his friend, Jonathan nodded, his features far more reflective. “I have to admit to feelin' the same way. I want Winnie to be happy, but it is difficult to imagine her not being here in the future. I hate the thought of her always living in Indiana.”

“If it's any consolation, I can tell you that I've found that worrying and second-guessing makes no difference,” Katie said softly. “People will do what they will. All we can do is hope their decisions are good and that they made their choices with both their head and heart.”

“That is good thinkin'. I'll pray that Winnie is thinking that way.”

As was the norm, the adults took time to relax and enjoy each other's company while the
kinner
bundled up,
played outside, then ran into the kitchen and asked for snacks. As the hours grew late, toddlers found places to nap in back bedrooms and older members found themselves nodding off.

As the sun set, families hitched up their buggies and began to leave. More friends waved good-bye, promising to stop by later in the week to help load pews into the wagon.

At last only Katie's family remained. Happy for Anna's and her mother's company, she used the opportunity to show off the progress Mary and Hannah were making with the quilt. Attentively, she listened as her mother offered additional suggestions for more simple projects.

However, no matter who was at the house, Katie was constantly aware of Jonathan. His soft, distinctive voice echoed to her whenever he spoke. Every so often, she'd find her eyes straying to him, noticing how handsome he looked in his cornflower blue shirt. She smiled when he laughed with the other men in front of the fire.

She couldn't help but notice that Jonathan also seemed to be looking her way more than once or twice. He'd hurried to help her when she'd carried a load of quilts to spread out for the children. He clasped her elbow when she almost stumbled on a step.

Most of all, he seemed to be enjoying himself. That had to mean things were getting better between them. Perhaps they'd set the groundwork for a future together.

Perhaps her dreams of sharing a life with him weren't so far-fetched, after all?

 

“I can't help but feel sorry for Winnie,” Jonathan said to Katie two days later as he folded up his sister's latest letter. He'd brought it inside with him when he came home from work, but had waited until after their dinner of pork roast and stuffing to read it.

Katie and he were now enjoying carrot cake and coffee and discussing the letter. “Though I tried to warn Winnie about the dangers of getting her hopes up, I feel bad that things aren't turning out like she'd hoped.”

Katie felt the same way, as well as a little bit dismayed. The practical part of her had always assumed Winnie would be returning with wedding plans. After all, such a forthcoming agreement must had been understood between Winnie and her Malcolm, otherwise, why would Winnie have been so all fired up to go?

Now, though, Katie realized that she'd been just as swept away in Winnie's flights of fancy. “Perhaps she needs to be a bit more patient. It takes time to plan a future. Winnie must know that.”

“She might. This Malcolm may not be so sure.” He speared another chunk of cake. “And if he's not sure about Winnie, then it is best she finds out now. He'd have to go a fair distance to be good enough for my sister.” Warming up to the subject, he added, “Winnie's got a lot to offer, don't you think?”

“Indeed,” she said, smiling as Jonathan scooped up another bite of cake. Oh that man did enjoy his sweets!

“I think she's mighty pretty. Don't you think so?”

“I do.” Winnie was tall and slim and willowy. She handled herself well, too, walking proudly, never timidly among their people. Katie had a feeling that if Winnie were dressed like an
Englischer
, she'd catch the attention of quite a few people.

“
Jah
? That's it?”

“I don't know what else to say. Yes, she's pretty.” Sometimes Jonathan's manner was so like Henry's that they could be twins. Henry, too, had always been protective of her and her feelings. Feeling sorry for him, she finally added, “Brothers always feel protective of their sisters though. I'm not sure if you would see her flaws, if she had any.”

After scraping the last of the plate for a smidgen of frosting, he chuckled. “Your words are fair.” Pushing back his chair, he stood up. “Well, anyway, perhaps it is just as well, then. He doesn't seem to understand how much she would be giving up to be his wife. And, if he's not aware of that, then he surely doesn't sound like the man for her.”

“Who knows who that will be?”

“Well, not someone like Malcolm sounds to be. We've now received ten letters from Winnie. She doesn't mention Malcolm doing much other than working at the hardware store.”

Katie found she had to agree. “I'm sure Winnie is wondering why he invited her out to see him, if he isn't making any time for her. When I wrote to her last week, I encouraged her to hint to him that she'd enjoy going for walks or visiting the shops around his home.”

Tapping on the latest letter, Jonathan frowned. “If he's done any of that, we haven't heard about it. Yes, this Malcolm is definitely not the right man for Winnie. I do not think they would make a good match of it. Poor Winnie. I wonder what she'll do now. Maybe she should just hurry home.”

Though Jonathan seemed to be talking to himself, not her, Katie wondered the same thing. Winnie wasn't afraid to speak her mind, even to the men and elders of their order.

And though she was loyal to a fault and a hard worker, Katie had always sensed a slight dissatisfaction in her, as if she wasn't quite sure what she was unhappy about, but it was there all the same. Though no one in their circle of friends had ever openly commented on it, Katie had spied knowing looks between other girls when Winnie blurted out something that was slightly too brash.

She didn't look much like the rest of them, either. Her hair was a dark, dark brown. Almost black. The opposite of Jonathan and his light, almost golden head of hair. Her light blue eyes warred for attention with her dimples. More than one man had commented on them.

But underneath her striking looks and strong personality was a warm heart just begging to be loved and nurtured.

Katie was sure that with the right love and affection, some of Winnie's armor would melt away, leaving just a gentle heart and sweet nature for all to see.

Eli had been right when he'd stated that it had been strange not to have Winnie around. She added a lot to every conversation and her fun laugh was infectious.

But by the sound of Winnie's letters, Malcolm didn't see any of that. Or if he did, he wasn't sharing his thoughts with Winnie.

Tracing one calloused finger along the crease in the letter, Jonathan frowned. “Katie, I feel mighty responsible for her plight. I should have known better than to let her go off to Indiana like she did.”

“You had no choice.” Giving into impulse, Katie reached out and patted his arm. “Malcolm couldn't come here, not with his father doing poorly and the hardware store his sole responsibility. You had to let her meet him. She is old enough, too. Old enough to know her own mind.”

“
Jah
, but perhaps I should have asked her not to stay for so long.”

“Everyone thought his family sounded amiable and kind. We all assumed she'd be happy.”

“But I could've said no.”

“If you'd done that, there would have been trouble, too. After all, she's your sister, not your daughter.”

“It is still my duty to protect her.”

“But isn't it also your duty to be there for her even during difficult times?”

“But this was of her own making. Now she's hurting. I could have prevented this.”

“I disagree. She did not bring this disappointment on herself, it was just how things worked out.”

He pushed his dessert plate to one side. “But I should have known.”

“How could you?” Because she felt she had some knowledge on the subject, Katie said, “Winnie had to take a risk
in order to be happy. She had to do something for herself, just to see if she could. She had no choice, don't you see?”

“Not at all. There's plenty of men here for her.”

“Then why hasn't one taken her fancy?”

Jonathan shook his head. Katie knew even if he did have some ideas, he would never say anything. His loyalty to his sister would never permit that. More softly, Katie said, “Jonathan, Winnie has only done what she intended. She wanted to get to know Malcolm and his family better. She's gotten to do that.”

“But it hasn't worked out well.”

“Jonathan, you're going to have to come to terms with the fact that Winnie wants to have her own life—not just help you with yours.”

Like the flip of a page, his expression shuttered. “You make it sound as if I've made her stay here. That is untrue.”

He might never have said the words, but Katie knew the Lundy family well enough to know that it had been expected. She would have expected as much out of her family. But she could also see that she'd just inadvertently hurt his feelings. “I'm sorry I spoke out of turn.”

But if Jonathan heard, he didn't give notice. “Winnie has never said I asked too much of her.”