Wanted: Parents for a Baby! (10 page)

When he pulled in the driveway, he stared at the large house Victoria had insisted they build, struck by the sudden urge to put the house up for sale. Yeah, the housing market sucked, but you couldn't sell what you didn't list. Besides, so what if he took a loss?

The place had never felt like home anyway.

With renewed determination he called a real estate agent and left a message about wanting to put his house up for sale. Then he called the hospital to check on Emma. She remained stable, thankfully showing no sign of running a fever.

Then he sat back and stared at his phone, willing Cassie to return his call.

But as the hours ticked by she didn't.

* * *

Cassie spent the rest of her Saturday with her friend Gloria, trying to forget about Ryan, at least for a little while. Gloria was happy to oblige. They ordered Chinese food and enjoyed a chick-flick marathon.

Her heart raced when she realized Ryan had called, but she couldn't bring herself to return his call. For one thing, why on earth would he think she hadn't made it home? This was Cedar Bluff, not the north side of Milwaukee. Sure, they had some crime, but nothing that would prevent her from getting home all right. He was simply being ridiculous and she feared that if she called him back she'd throw herself at him, begging for another kiss.

Not a good idea.

“This was great, Gloria. Thanks for picking me up and inviting me over,” Cassie said, when the last movie finished. “I should head home, I have to work tomorrow.”

“Poor thing,” Gloria said with mock pity. “I'm off tomorrow for my brother's graduation party. You could come before work if you want, it starts at noon.”

Cassie wrinkled her nose. “You'll be busy with your family. I'll just sleep in and then go to work.”

“The invitation stands if you change your mind,” Gloria assured her.

“Okay, I'll think about it,” Cassie agreed. The last thing she needed was to wallow around her apartment all morning, thinking about Ryan. Maybe going to the graduation party would be a good way to keep from ruminating over things she couldn't change.

“Do you want me to drive you home?” Gloria asked, as she headed toward the door.

Cassie rolled her eyes. “Don't be silly, we live in the same apartment complex. I'm just two buildings down.”

“Okay, maybe I'll see you tomorrow.” Gloria gave her a quick hug and then closed and locked the door behind her.

Cassie had to force herself not to call Ryan as she trudged home. The urge to connect with him was strong so she mentally made a list of things to do once she was approved to be a foster parent.

The first thing on her list was to look for a two-bedroom apartment. She wasn't sure how many two-bedroom apartments were available at the moment and made a mental
note to check with the manager as soon as possible. Plus, she had to convince the landlord to transfer her lease as it wasn't up until November. Once she had a second bedroom she could decorate for a new baby.

For Emma? God, she hoped so.

She knew she needed to be realistic. As much as she longed to have Emma, she had to be prepared for the fact that she might not get approved in time. At least she'd be ready for the next baby that needed her.

A baby that she wouldn't be able to have on her own.

That night, she shut her phone off so that she wouldn't be tempted to call Ryan. Or answer his call if he tried again.

She tossed and turned most of the night, leaving her feeling cranky and out of sorts when she switched her phone back on the next morning. She debated going over to Gloria's parents' place on the lake, but decided she wasn't really in the mood for company.

When her phone rang, she jumped, expecting the caller to be Ryan. But instead it was the hospital number. Even if it was Ryan calling from the hospital, he might have news about Emma, so she quickly picked it up. “Hello?”

“Cassie? This is Diane. One of our day-shift nurses started throwing up and needed to go home. Would you be willing to start your shift early? We could really use the help.”

“Of course,” Cassie agreed. “I can be there in fifteen minutes.”

“Thanks so much,” Diane said in a rush. “The nurse who left to go home sick was taking care of Emma and the newest baby from the other day, Daniel. So at least you'll be familiar with one of the patients.”

Knowing that she would get to take care of Emma made all the difference in the world. Her mood brightened considerably. “Great. I'll be there soon.” Cassie quickly disconnected from the call and hurried to change into her scrubs.

It wasn't until she was walking into the hospital, that she wondered if Ryan was working today, too.

Her cheerfulness dimmed a little as she realized how difficult it would be to work alongside him as if they hadn't shared that sizzling kiss. This was the reason it was better not to date your colleagues. When things fell apart, everything was affected, both your work life and home life.

All the more reason not to venture down the path of temptation again.

Cassie quickly swiped her badge to get into the unit and then went to punch in at the time clock. She hurried over to Emma's warmer, grateful to see that Daniel's warmer was immediately adjacent to Emma's. Both babies were on ventilators, but as she quickly reviewed the notes it was clear Daniel had been weaned down to the point he was ready to have the tube out.

“Thanks again for coming in,” Diane said, hurrying over. “Do you have any questions? I've been keeping an eye on these two until you could get here.”

“Looks like Daniel's ready to get rid of his ventilator. Who's the intensivist on call today?”

“Dr. Ryan was here earlier. He's in a delivery right now, but he should be back soon.” Diane didn't seem to notice how Cassie had gone still at hearing Ryan's name. “Do you want me to double-check the drips with you?”

“Ah, sure, that would be great.” Cassie forced her brain to go into work mode, even though she was secretly thrilled Ryan was working today.

Once she'd caught up with what had
transpired over the past twenty-four to thirty-six hours, she hovered over Emma. “Hey, sweetpea, how are you? I'm going to be here with you for twelve hours today, isn't that great? And then tomorrow I'm going to enroll in foster-care classes. I'm fighting for you, sweetpea. All you need to do is to get better, okay?”

Of course Emma didn't respond, but Cassie didn't care. She stroked Emma's cheek, hoping to soothe the baby. She felt a bit disheartened to realize they'd had to raise the vent settings since Friday, but, of course, they couldn't risk the chance she might develop pneumonia.

She managed to keep busy for the next hour or so, between double-checking other nurse's medications and caring for her two babies. Every free moment she had she spent with Emma.

“Good afternoon, Cassandra, you're here early.”

Ryan's deep voice made her shiver in awareness, despite the stern talking-to she'd given herself before her shift.

“Amy got sick, so they called me in to cover,” she said, striving to keep her tone steady. “How does Emma's chest X-ray look?
I thought her lungs sounded pretty good, but maybe I missed something.”

“Her X-ray looks much better,” Ryan said, glancing down at Emma with a smile. “Her lower lobe has expanded back to normal, and her breath sounds are definitely clearing up.”

“Wonderful news,” she said in relief. “I've been so worried about her.”

“I know.” Ryan stepped closer and dropped his voice. “I was worried about you, too. Why didn't you return my call?”

He was so close she found it hard to breathe normally. She took a hasty step back, knowing she didn't owe him any explanations, but feeling compelled to tell him anyway. “I spent time with my friend, Gloria. You remember her, she's the one who took care of Emma in the ER until we got down there.”

“So she came and picked you up?” he asked.

“I actually ran into her and she offered to drive me home. We live in the same apartment complex but in different buildings.” The alarm on Daniel's vent went off, indicating a high peak pressure, one of the signs that he was trying to overbreathe the vent. “Have you had a chance to examine Daniel? I think he's ready to be extubated.”

“Let me double-check his weaning parameters.” Ryan crossed over to Daniel's warmer. She followed, determined to keep things on a professional level between them.

No more mooning over him. And definitely no more kissing.

“You're right, these look good. Call the respiratory therapist to help me extubate him.”

Grateful for something productive to do, Cassie did as Ryan asked. Jason was the respiratory therapist on duty today, and he promised to be right over.

Cassie concentrated on documenting in Daniel's chart, silently admitting it was an easy way to avoid Ryan.

“Hi, Cassie,” Jason said as he approached. “I hear Daniel is about to get rid of that nasty tube.”

“Absolutely,” she agreed. “Dr. Ryan wants to extubate whenever you're ready.”

The procedure of removing a breathing tube didn't take long and Daniel let out a loud cry as soon as the tube was gone. Ryan picked Daniel up and propped the baby against his shoulder. Ryan rubbed the boy's back as if he had a dozen children of his own.

“There, now, you're going to be much happier now that you can yell at us, aren't you?”
he said with a wry smile. “Trust me, that crying is good for your lungs so don't hold back. Just let it all out. We can take it.”

Cassie stared at him in shock, her heart melting like butter on a griddle as she watched Ryan caring for Daniel. Did he want children of his own? Or not? He should, because he'd make a great father.

Daniel quieted down, resting against Ryan's chest.

“You're a natural father,” she murmured. “You must want children of your own.”

The light in Ryan's eyes dimmed a bit, although he nodded. “Someday,” he agreed.

Someday? What did that mean? Someday, as in once he was ready to risk having a relationship? Or someday, as in a long time from now?

Was he still grieving over his dead wife?

Her stomach clenched with worry. Ryan wanted children, babies she probably wasn't able to have. But did that desire extend to Emma? She had no idea.

Weary of her mental tug-of-war, she turned away. Staying away from Ryan was better for her in the long run.

When Emma's monitor alarm went off, she hurried over, relaxing a bit when she noticed
that the baby had somehow dislodged one of the heart leads.

“False alarm,” she said, when she saw Ryan had returned Daniel to his warmer and was crossing over to Emma. “One of her leads came loose.”

He nodded, but didn't look in a hurry to leave. She took a breath, wishing he would just go away and leave her alone. She didn't want to feel all torn up inside like this. When the phone next to Emma's computer rang, she pounced on it. “This is Cassie in the NNICU, may I help you?”

“Cass? It's Gloria.” Her friend's voice was thick with tears. “My brother, Trey, is here in the ER. I think he overdosed on pain meds. The police are investigating.”

“What? He overdosed on pain meds and the police are there?” Cassie said, her gaze clashing with Ryan's. “I don't understand. Where did he get pain meds?”

“I don't know, but his condition is pretty serious. I know you're working but if you have time to come down to the ER, I'd appreciate it.”

“I'll come as soon as I can,” Cassie promised.

“Who overdosed on pain meds?” Ryan demanded.

“Gloria Reynolds's brother, Trey,” she admitted. Before she could say anything more Ryan spun on his heel and strode out of the unit, no doubt heading down to the ER.

She frowned at his retreating figure. Why was Ryan heading down to the ER? She couldn't come up with a single reason.

She turned back toward Emma, knowing that she couldn't leave her tiny patients, no matter how much she wanted to follow Ryan.

R
YAN JOGGED DOWN
the stairs to the ER, determined to talk to the police investigating Trey Reynolds's overdose. He desperately wanted to know where Gloria's brother had gotten his pain meds.

He knew the police wouldn't want to tell him anything, but he hoped that if Detective Trammel was there, he'd get something out of the detective. Ryan had a sick feeling in his gut that there was a connection between this young man's overdose and Victoria's death.

Surely Detective Trammel knew it, too?

No one questioned why he was there when he walked through the arena of the ER over to the trauma bay. He stopped short when he saw the ER team working with controlled chaos to save the young man's life. He was impressed at how quickly yet efficiently they performed live-saving measures. They'd already inserted
a breathing tube and were in the process of giving medication into his stomach to prevent whatever pills he'd taken from being absorbed into his bloodstream.

In the corner of the room, Gloria, the ER nurse who'd been at the triage desk when Emma had been dropped off, stood with her hands over her mouth and tears trailing down her cheeks. He knew all about the helpless guilt of not being able to prevent the tragedy.

But before he could walk over there he caught a glimpse of Detective Trammel on the other side of the room.

Without hesitation, he headed over to where the detective and a uniformed officer were standing, giving the trauma team a wide berth to stay out of their way.

“Detective Trammel,” he said with a nod. “I understand you have another pain med overdose?”

The detective scowled. “How did you hear about this case?”

“Through a friend,” he acknowledged, refusing to feel guilty for eavesdropping on Cassie's conversation with Gloria. “Do you know what physician's name is listed on the prescription bottle?”