Wedding Haters (Event to Remember Series-Book 2)

Wedding Haters

A Novel

By Melissa
Baldwin

To all my girlfriends—you
know we’
ve all hated a wedding at some
point.

Chapter 1

This could very well be the most amazing
place in the universe. I’m still in awe that this is happening to
me. I would keep pinching myself, but I’m starting to get weird
marks on my arms, and pretty soon, people are going to start
talking. I don’t know what exactly they would say, but you never
know with all the haters out there. I actually just read one of
those funny e-cards on Facebook and it said, “Cheers to my haters,
the best is yet to come.” I admit I have a (small) addiction to
those funny e-cards.

I walk around the ballroom and envision my
wedding day-- too bad October seems so far away. I’m not the most
patient person in the world. OK, truth be told, I’m not patient at
all. My fiancé Cole on the other hand is extremely patient, or it
could be that he is so laid back that patience is not of any
importance to him. He’s a stand-up comedian, and as you can
imagine, he hardly takes anything seriously. However, his marriage
proposal was a big production.

After one of his shows, he actually hired
people to approach him and ask him for his autograph. He introduced
me as his girlfriend and then said, “I’m hoping she will become my
fiancée tonight.” The lady he hired then proceeded to take off her
wedding ring and tell him to kneel down and ask me. It turns out
she had my ring the whole time. People were cheering, and I sat
there like an idiot wondering exactly what had happened. OK, I know
how this sounds, but it really was the most romantic and fun thing
that has ever happened to me. I’m sure it will be a story that our
great-great-great-grandchildren will talk about.

“Madie, earth to Madie. Hello, wake up?” I
notice my best friend Sienna is waving her hand frantically trying
to get my attention.

“Well? Are you happy with everything so far?”
she asks smugly as she folds her arms. She’s obviously proud of
herself and already knows what my answer is going to be.

“Are you kidding? Yes!” I exclaim.

The truth is I’m beyond pleased with
everything. Sienna recently launched her own event planning
company, and she has done really well so far. She spent years
working for a well-known event company and possibly the most
horrible human being to ever walk the earth. Since then, she built
a name for herself, and it has paid off. And now my wedding is
turning into one of the biggest events of the century. Who
knew?

I wish I could say that I haven’t been one of
those bridezillas you hear about. But that would be a lie. I mean,
I’m not completely impossible or anything like that. I would say
indecisive would be a more fitting word. In my defense, unlike the
majority of the state of California, I’m planning on doing this
only once. That means only one wedding, one marriage, to one man
for the rest of my life.

As I walk around, I remember when I was
growing up I had pictured myself dancing under twinkling Christmas
lights in a recreation center or maybe a church gym. Not that there
is anything wrong with having a wedding in either of those places,
believe me I would marry Cole in a parking lot if I had to. I guess
to some people a wedding in the ballroom of a hotel may not be that
glamorous, but to me it is. I feel like royalty!

There’s only one problem; I’m having a
difficult time choosing everything that I want. Like I said, I tend
to be a tad bit indecisive. But honestly, why do I only have to
choose one dress or one cake? There are so many possibilities out
there, and thankfully, Sienna is level-headed enough to keep me
grounded. I have a feeling I’m about to drive her to start
drinking, a lot.

I take a break from my daydreaming to glance
at my phone. A feeling of dread comes over me as I’m thrown back
into reality. Crap! I’m going to be late for my next
appointment.

“AHHHH!” I scream. “I have to go. Mrs. Wilson
is going to be at the salon in twenty minutes.”

“See you later.” I hear Sienna yell as I
sprint out of the ballroom. I’m a freelance hair stylist and Mrs.
Wilson is a “special” client. In other words, she’s also a close
friend of my grandmother’s, and I will hear about it until the end
of time if she is unhappy or if I’m late. Every time I see her name
on my schedule, I feel like I should take a Xanax. I have a very
good reputation and a wonderful clientele, but when my grandmother
refers her friends, I become a hot mess. The most interesting part
is that my grandmother has never come to me to get her hair done.
Not that I’m surprised about that.

I absolutely love doing hair; it’s my
passion. Well, it’s one of my passions. My other passion is baking.
Many people are shocked when they hear this. About a year ago, I
started decorating cookies and somehow started a side cookie
business. Looking back, I’m not even sure how it all came about. It
started with a few birthday parties and showers, and then it
happened, my big break. Several months ago, I was “discovered” at
my friend Abby’s birthday party. Which brings us to now; in a few
weeks, my cookie creations will be featured in Bev’s Sweet Treats
in Beverly Hills. Yes, as in 90210! I still haven’t decided on an
official name for this business. Really though, I’m not even sure
if it is a business or a hobby or what? I had some business cards
made that say Cookies by Madie, but I think I need to get a little
more creative and choose an official name. Cookies by Madie sounds
really boring and lame, or so I’ve been told.

All of this excitement and my recent success
have definitely pleased my grandmother, which doesn’t happen very
often. I have disappointed her a few times throughout my adult
life. My decision to drop out of college to go to cosmetology
school was the big one. Especially because my overachieving cousins
Ellie and Stephy chose “respectable” careers. Those careers being
accounting and architecture. My parents tell me that she loves me
the same, but I’ve never felt that way. Needless to say, my choice
in having my wedding reception at the Four Seasons and my cookies
featured in a Beverly Hills bakery brought my status up from pure
disappointment to somewhat acceptable. Don’t get me wrong, I know
she loves me, but I think she loves my cousins a little more. I
know I may sound like a spoiled child, but at least I admit I have
childhood issues. Isn’t admitting it a step in the right direction
or half the battle or some other old saying that is supposed to be
therapeutic?

Somehow, I manage to beat Mrs. Wilson to the
salon with about four minutes to spare. She’s notoriously punctual,
so this is a surprise. I run around and grab my supplies to prepare
for the next few grueling hours of my life.

When she arrives, I can see that she’s in a
good mood today. She asks all about my wedding plans, which is
ridiculous because I know my grandmother has been giving her a
play-by-play of every detail. Things get a little awkward when she
starts asking me if her son and his wife will be seated at her
table. I completely fumble over my words because I’m 100% sure that
her son is
not
on my guest list. The truth is I don’t
remember ever meeting her son. I start to panic, so I tell her I
will have to “check on that.” If I was to tell her no, then she
would call my grandmother and then grandmother would call me. I
know she would go on and on about how Mrs. Wilson is one of her
greatest friends and how her son fixed Grandmother’s garbage
disposal ten years ago, so of course he
has
to be on the
guest list. Hopefully Sienna will come up with a genius plan to get
us out of this.

After I finish with my appointment, I find my
phone and dial Cole’s number.

“Hey, girl,” he answers with a raspy, deep
voice. He says he’s trying to channel Ryan Gosling. I love when he
does that.

“Just finished with Mrs. Wilson,” I say as I
start to clean up my station.

“How is my girlfriend Helen?” he says
sarcastically. Mrs. Wilson loves Cole. She says he reminds her of
an old boyfriend she had many years ago. She always links her arms
in his and giggles every time she’s around him.

“She was in a good mood, but I’m sorry to
tell you that she didn’t ask about you at all. Maybe she’s over
you,” I say sarcastically.

“What? I seriously doubt that,” he says with
a laugh. “Hmmmm, I guess I will just have to marry you,” he
adds.

I smile to myself. I’m so in love with this
man; he makes me happier than I ever thought I could be. Even when
I’m mad at him, he still has some kind of magical power that makes
me forget why I was ever mad. After I hang up, I start to reminisce
about when we met. It was a little over two years ago. The truth is
at first he annoyed me to no end, so annoying that every time I was
around him I wanted to punch him. He was always sarcastic and never
seemed to take anything seriously. Now looking back, those are some
of the qualities that I love the most. His passion for life is one
of the things that made me fall in love with him. He has such a
positive energy, and he is one of those people that can make
friends everywhere he goes. I wish I had his warmth and
openness.

Looking back at my dating history, there were
times I thought I would never find someone so amazing. I think it’s
safe to say that I had some of the absolute worst dating
experiences ever. One day I woke up and realized that I was just
wasting time. I pulled myself together and went after my dreams.
Not long after, Cole came along and the rest is history.

Cole comes from a strong and loving family,
but he’s definitely the wild one in the bunch. His mother, Susan,
is your typical perfect wife and mother. I usually feel completely
inferior around her--not because she purposely makes me feel this
way, but because I’m the woman who is taking her baby boy away.
She’s also a member of several women’s clubs in the community, she
hosts tons of fabulous dinner parties, and she wears pearls while
cleaning.

Cole’s father is usually very quiet and lets
Susan dominate their lives. I think he likes it that way though.
They are very educated and conservative, and I don’t think they
were pleased with Cole’s decision to become a professional
comedian. But they support him nonetheless. Susan and the rest of
his family have always been so nice and welcoming to me, they’ve
become a second family since my parents moved out of state. I’m an
only child, and the only family that lives nearby is my grandmother
and my two cousins whom I’m not close to at all.

Speaking of my grandmother, she’s left me
several messages and we keep missing each other. She loves to keep
tabs on our wedding plans to ensure that we are planning a proper
event. Her heart is in the right place, or so it seems, but she is
definitely “old school.” She demanded that I take a class on proper
dinner etiquette-- the kind with the correct silverware and where
to put your pinky finger while drinking tea. I totally lied and
told her I did. I know that’s bad, but I figured I could go on
YouTube and learn all of that nonsense in case she tries to quiz
me, and knowing my grandmother, she will.

After work, I join Cole at the club for
dinner and his show. When I finally get home, Sienna is already
asleep. Our apartment is in a constant state of disarray as we are
both cleaning out all of our junk and packing to move. Well, really
all of my junk because Sienna doesn’t have any junk. She would be
considered an anti-hoarder. I don’t know if there is a show about
anti-hoarders, but if there ever were, she could easily be the
star. This move has been a hard transition for both of us because
we have been roommates for years and friends for even longer. Right
around the time of my engagement, Sienna went through a really
horrible breakup. At that time, everything seemed to be changing at
once. Things were especially hard for us because I didn’t like her
boyfriend, and I was vocal about it. Since then, she’s in a great
place and has found a beautiful new apartment that will be close to
both me and our friend Abby.

Abby is our other best friend. She just had a
beautiful baby boy named Ace Matthew. Abby was definitely born to
be a mom; she’s also a teacher and the first of our friends to have
a baby. Abby is always the one who takes care of everybody; she’s
understanding, nurturing, and patient.

When I go into my room, I find a note along
with a list from Sienna on top of my mess. I’m a little surprised
she didn’t attempt to clean up in here. I admit it’s bad, probably
worse than ever. I sit down and read her list. She has been on me
to pick out centerpieces and make choices for the caterers. After
months of asking, and now begging, I still can’t decide what I want
to do. I made the mistake of going on Pinterest, and now I keep
changing my mind. Since the wedding is in October, I chose warm
colors: plum, gold, and burgundy. I also picked out my wedding gown
pretty quickly too. It was the third gown I tried on. I thought
that was the most important decision I had to make, but I know
that’s not enough for her.