What Color Is Your Parachute? (37 page)
Read What Color Is Your Parachute? Online
Authors: Richard N. Bolles
1The so-called “baby boomers”—the 76 million Americans born between 1945 and 1964—are beginning to enter the time of Life that is traditionally called “retirement.”
2
Some people love that word. I’m not one of them. For me, it implies “being put out to pasture”—to borrow an image from a cow. It implies a kind of parole from a thing called
work
, which is assumed to be onerous, and tedious. It implies “disengagement” from both
work
and
Life
, as one patiently—or impatiently—waits to die. It thinks of Life in terms of work; I prefer instead to think of Life in terms of music. My favorite metaphor is that of a symphony. A symphony, traditionally, has four parts to it—four movements, as they’re called. So does Life. There is infancy, then the time of learning, then the time of working, and finally, this time that we are talking about, often called “retirement.” But if we discourage the use of the word “retirement,” then this might better be called the Fourth Movement.
The Fourth Movement, in the symphonic world, is a kind of blank slate. It was and is up to the composer to decide what to write upon it. Traditionally, the composer writes of triumph, victory, and joy—as in Beethoven’s Symphony #3, the
Eroica.
But it may, alternatively, be a kind
of anticlimactic, meandering piece of music—as in Tchaikovsky’s Symphony #6, the
Pathetique.
There the Third Movement ends with a bombastic, stirring march. The Fourth Movement, immediately following, is sub-dued, meditative, meandering, and sounds almost like an afterthought.
Well, there are our choices about our own lives: shall the Fourth Movement, the final movement, of our lives be
pathetique
or
eroica—
pathetic or heroic? Your call!
I like this defining of our lives in terms of
music
, rather than in terms of
work
.
To carry the metaphor onward, in this Fourth Movement of our lives, we have instruments, which we must treat with care. They are: our
body,
our
mind,
our
spirit,
and what we poetically speak of as our
heart,
which Chinese medicine calls “the Emperor.”
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Body, mind, spirit, heart. Some of these instruments are in shiny, splendid condition, in our lives. Others are slightly dented. Or greatly dented. But these are the instruments that play the musical notes and themes of this time of our lives.
The traditional notes are:
sleep, water, eating, faith, love, loneliness, survival
(financial and spiritual),
health care, dreams
(fulfilled or unfulfilled), and
triumph
—over all adversities—and even
death.
Traditionally, the themes for this period of our lives also include
planning
—as in the phrase “retirement planning.” But I believe planning is difficult for the Fourth Movement. It seems to me the outstanding characteristic of the Fourth Movement in our lives is the increased number of things that knock our plans into a cocked hat—the events we call
unexpected
. So I prefer to say that one of the notes we strike during the Fourth Movement in particular, is how to handle
interruptions.
Martin Luther King Jr. perhaps put it best, just before his death:
Now, in music, interruptions are the pauses between the notes; those pauses that, in fact, keep the notes from just becoming a chaotic jumble. Just listen to the first few bars of Beethoven’s Fifth. Thank God for the interruptions, the spaces between the notes.
So, where have we come thus far? Well, I suggested that it is useful to think of Life after 50 as the Fourth Movement in the symphony of our lives—the movement that comes after the first three: Infancy, then The Time of Learning, and then The Time of Working. And it is useful to think that we have instruments, which play certain themes in this movement, as we have seen. That brings us to the $64,000 question: “Toward what end?” “What is the point of all these notes, all these themes, in the Fourth Movement? What are they intended to produce?”
When I think of the overall impression left with me after I hear the Fourth Movement of any great symphony, such as Schubert’s Ninth, one impression sticks out, above all others. And that impression is one of
energy
. I am left with an impression of great energy. And the more the better, say I. Energy is lovely to behold, and even lovelier to possess. That energy belongs in the Fourth Movement because it brings the whole symphony to triumphant resolution.
This, it seems to me, is how people evaluate the Fourth Movement of our lives, as well. Not: did we live triumphantly and die victoriously; but: do we manifest energy? Do we manifest enthusiasm? Do we manifest excitement, still?
Ask any employer what they are looking for, when they interview a job candidate who is 50 years or older, and they will tell you: energy. They ask themselves, “Does the candidate (
that’s us
) slouch in the chair? Does the candidate look like they’re just marking time in Life? Or does the candidate lean slightly forward in the chair as we talk? Does the candidate seem excited about the prospect of working here?”
Energy in people past 50 is exciting to an employer. And to those around us. It suggests the candidate will come in early, and stay late. It suggests that whatever task is given, the task will be done thoroughly and completely, and not just barely or perfunctorily.
All right, then,
energy.
Where shall we find energy, after 50? When we were young, energy resided in the
physical
side of our nature. We were “feeling our oats.” We could go all day, and go all night. “My, where do you get all your energy?” our grandmother would ask us. We were a dynamo…of
physical
energy.
Can’t say the same when we reach 50, and beyond. Oh, some of us still have it. But as we get older the rest of us start to slow down. Physical energy is often harder to come by, despite workouts and exercise and marathons. Increasingly, our energy must more and more come from
within
.
It must spring not from our muscles but from our excitement about Life
and about what we are doing in this Fourth and final Movement of our lives.
This brought back to me a memory I have cherished since childhood. We spent a summer in Balboa in a large cottage on the grand canal and went fishing every day and swimming in the warm southern California water. Next door to us was another cottage with an old couple who always seemed to be sitting on their front porch observing the summer activities. We made friends and the lady wanted to be called Auntie Bess. I think I was twelve and she was probably eighty and her husband the same. Auntie Bess always asked what we were going to do each day and we became friends. Each day we brought home lots of fish and she was really excited when we offered them to her. This continued through the summer and one evening she offered to take us clamming on our beach and explained how we could make a clamming probe with a coat hanger and that we should meet her at low tide around six the next morning.
We arrived at the beach in front of the cottage at the same time and I watched her slow progress and unsteady walk and very thick glasses. Her enthusiasm was boundless and she showed us the two holes in the sand that razor clams make and how to pull them out with the coat hanger wire. We probably got ten nice clams and Auntie Bess started to fade and said she would watch us from the porch. I watched her unsteady and slow progress back to her porch. I couldn’t forget the energy and enthusiasm that lady had which made her actually quiver with delight in showing two little boys how to bring up clams. Never had I seen anyone burn so bright with so few resources.
Oh I hope I can be like that.
PHIL WOOD
This is why, past 50, we need to spend more time on the questions of our youth—what
are your favorite skills?
where
do you most enjoy using them? and
how
do you find such a place and such a job or endeavor?
These questions are entertaining when we are young, but critical when we are past 50, as they are the doorway to finding our
energy
in the Fourth and final Movement of the symphony of our lives.
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Energy is what impresses employers, if you still need (or want) to work, past 50. Employers often worry that older workers have lost their energy and enthusiasm for work. The best way to show that you are not the type to just coast through your remaining work-years, until you give up working, is to display some passion during the interview. Remember,
energy
is what employers are looking for, the most. Figure out what
does
get you excited.
Stay alert,
very
alert, during the whole interview. Lean forward in your chair, ever so slightly. When the employer is speaking, respond with an intelligent question (or curiosity) about what they have just said. When they have asked you a question, don’t respond with a long-winded answer. Twenty seconds to two minutes at most, is best.
