What If ... Your Past Came Back to Haunt You (5 page)

Has Haley worked her magic on Alex and his anti-environmental views? Results inconclusive. But there are hopeful signs. It was good of her to try, anyway. But even the fate of the Cape May warbler is easily trumped by local gossip like Joan's—no wonder Haley and Alex were distracted.

Dave Metzger, Mrs. Metzger and Mr. Von together in the same house? It boggles the mind.

Haley has a good imagination, but even she can't quite picture it. To send her chez Von to see the weird menagerie for herself, go to (
GARAGE BANDWIDTH
). Dave is sure to be video-podcasting, and that's usually an event in itself.

So how are things going with Alex? Frankly, it's hard to tell. Do you think he's too conservative for Haley and that she'll never change him no matter how much film footage Perry shows him? Maybe she and Alex just don't have the right chemistry. But if they don't, whose molecules do have Haley's atomic number?

If you think Haley's still daydreaming about Devon McKnight go to (
TAKE THE LEAD
).

Maybe you think Haley should forget about Dave and Devon and leave her options open. Perhaps she should raid Joan's jewelry box and borrow something of sentimental value, just to see what kind of luck it attracts. If so, go to (
FAMILY JEWELS
).

Haley hasn't committed herself to any one path yet, so you still have time to steer her in the right direction—or the wrong one. Just watch your step, or she could end up in an unhappy place.

BLOND AMBITION

Haley's not the only one with an intriguing neighbor.

“H
aley Daley Dumpling! Over here!”

As soon as Haley walked into the Golden Dynasty, Shaun Willkommen waved her over to his booth. The restaurant was quiet, since it was four o'clock, during the lull between lunch and dinner, and the only people in the place were Hillsdale High students stopping in for an afternoon pig-out. Haley followed Shaun's beckoning arm to the booth in the back corner, where she found him with his girlfriend, Irene Chen, and Devon McKnight. Irene's parents owned the restaurant, and Haley was surprised to see Irene sitting instead of working. Next to Devon was a skinny peroxide blonde Haley didn't know but had seen around—most recently riding shotgun in Devon's beat-up old convertible.

“Sit down.” Shaun slid over to make room for Haley on his side of the booth. “The dim sum just arrived.”

Haley grabbed a pair of chopsticks and dipped a veggie bun in soy sauce before Shaun could eat them all. With an outsized personality and a taste for all things weird—make that all things, period—Shaun was known for his huge appetite. However, his recent glories on the track and field team had shaved a few pounds off of his maximum weight.

“You know Darcy, right, Haley?” Irene nodded at the bottle blonde. “Darcy Podowski, Haley Miller.”

“Hi,” Darcy said.

“Hi,” Haley said. “I've seen you around school.”

“She's a freshman,” Devon explained.

“And I live down the street from Devon,” Darcy added.

“Right.” Devon speared a dumpling and bit off the end. “So now that she goes to the high school we've got a park-and-ride thing going.” He laughed, and Darcy tickled his rib with her chopsticks. “Hey,” Devon said. “Don't get soy sauce on my shirt. This is a Jack's Vintage original.” Devon worked at Jack's Vintage Clothing store part-time, allowing Shawn, Irene and Haley to get clothes for practically free.

“Like you care,” Darcy said, tickling him again. Devon didn't seem to mind, it was true. He just laughed and tried to tickle her right back. They certainly were comfortable with each other—a little too comfortable, in Haley's opinion.

Park and ride?
Haley thought. What did Devon mean by
park
? Or by
ride,
for that matter?

“I've got soy sauce stains on just about everything I own,” Shaun said. “Since I met Rini here, I'm not one to worry about neatness.”

“That's for sure,” Irene said.

“I love my soy sauce stains,” Shaun said. “They're my little love marks.”

“Soon to be ex-girlfriend if you keep walking around looking like the victim of a food fight,” Irene warned.

“Speaking of exes. . . ,” Darcy said. “What's Rose up to these days?” Darcy stole a fried noodle from Devon's plate.

Devon shot Darcy a “shut up” look. Clearly this was not a topic of conversation he wanted introduced.

Hmm,
Haley thought.
What's this all about?

“Who's Rose?” Irene asked.

“Nobody.” Devon sank a bit in his seat. He clearly wanted to avoid the subject.

“She's Devon's ex,” Darcy explained. “From art school.”

Devon had transferred to Hillsdale High from an art school in the city the previous year. In the time Haley had known him, he'd never once mentioned an ex-girlfriend, or anyone named Rose for that matter, to her. So how did this Darcy know so much about his personal life, if all Devon did was give her a ride to school?

Or
was
that all they did together?

“Dude, tell,” Shaun said to Devon. “What's the story of Rose?”

“There's nothing to tell,” Devon said, glaring again at Darcy, who looked pleased with herself. “I swear. Rose was a girl I knew in art school, end of story.”

Haley had a feeling that wasn't the end of the story, but she decided not to press the issue—yet.

“Hot and sour soup?” A waiter appeared with a trayful of soup bowls and set them on the table.

“Take mine, Haley.” Irene passed her bowl down the table. “I'm sick of this stuff.”

“I'll never get sick of it.” Shaun lifted his bowl and took a huge slurp of soup. “Ow! Hot! Mm, sour. Ow! Hot! Mm, sour.”

Irene rolled her eyes. “You do that every time. I told you to let it cool first.”

“Tsiser t'nac I doog os sllems ti tub, wonk I,” Shaun said.

“What did he say?” Darcy asked. “Can he speak Chinese?”

“ ‘I know, but it smells so good,' ” Irene translated. “Sometimes Shaun talks backwards. Just one of his many endearing quirks. Takes a little getting used to.”

“Just like the rest of him,” Haley teased.

“That's enough out of you, Red,” Shaun said, tugging on a chunk of Haley's auburn hair.

“Shaun, no sticky fingers on other peoples' faces,” Irene scolded.

“It's okay,” Haley said. “I'm used to it. I've got a seven-year-old brother, remember?”

“Are my fingers chubby?” Shaun held up his thick, soft hand and stared at it in wonder. “I never thought of them that way.”

“Oh, please,” Irene said. “You're totally self-conscious about it. When he's alone in his room he secretly does this thing called hand aerobics in a vain attempt to make them thinner. It's the only part of his body that hasn't changed since he joined the track team.”

“The
only
part?” Devon asked slyly, causing Darcy to erupt in a fit of giggles.

“Artists' hands should be slender,” Shaun said. “Slender and expressive. Hand aerobics is a secret, Irene. You weren't supposed to tell.”

“Sorry,” Irene said. “I didn't know it was a
secret
secret. I thought it was just one of those Shaun secrets, where you don't care who knows about it.”

“What? Woman, from now on, assume everything I tell you is a secret secret unless otherwise informed.”

“Sure. Whatever you say,” Irene said.

“I've got skinny hands, Shaun, but it doesn't make me a good artist,” Darcy said, lifting her left hand. On her wrist was a small, inky star.

“You are so a good artist,” Devon said.

“I love your tat,” Irene said, grabbing Darcy's hand to examine the tattoo.

“It's cool, isn't it?” Devon said. Haley bristled slightly.

“It's brutally awesome,” Shaun said. “I've been wanting to get a tattoo forever, but I can't decide what to get. Like, as soon as I think for sure I want a mermaid, I change my mind and want a whale or something. There are too many choices out there.”

“Why not get both?” Darcy said.

“She's right,” Irene said. “You've got plenty of skin to cover.”

Shaun grinned and slapped his rounded belly. Then he grabbed another dumpling. “The more of these I eat, the more skin I'll have to tattoo.”

“That's one way to look at it,” Devon said.

“I told Dev he should get a tat of a coat of arms,” Darcy said. “You know, make one up. To play off his last name, McKnight.”

Dev?
Haley had never heard anyone call Devon “Dev” before, and it annoyed her for some reason.

“You could put a camera on the coat of arms,” Irene said.

“And maybe a skateboard, or a thrift shop porkpie hat . . .”

“Or just do a big knight, in armor, on horseback, right across your chest.” Shaun mimed ripping open his shirt like Superman to show off the imaginary knight tattoo gleaming on his chest. “That would be major. Maybe I should write
Willkommen
on my forehead, so everybody who sees me will feel Germanically welcome.”

“What about you, Haley?” Devon asked. “What would you do if you got a tattoo?”

Haley wasn't at all certain she wanted to permanently mark up her skin. But everyone else at the table seemed to be so into the idea, so she thought she'd better say something.

“Maybe a tiny four-leaf clover,” Haley said. “For luck. I like the star, too. But didn't it hurt, having a needle poking your wrist, Darcy?” Haley stroked her own wrist, trying to imagine it. “It's such a sensitive part of your body.”

“Not as sensitive as some parts,” Shaun said. Irene shot him a “shut up” look.

“It does hurt a little,” Darcy said. “But not for long. And it's totally worth it.”

The waiter reappeared to fill their water glasses and drop a small pile of fortune cookies on the table. Haley took one and broke it open.

“Read your fortune out loud,” Irene said.

“ ‘A figure from your past will soon reappear,' ” Haley read.

“Like a banana,” Shaun said.

“What?” Haley said.

“You're supposed to add ‘like a banana' at the end of your fortune, to make it more interesting,” Shaun said.

“That's so stupid,” Irene said. She opened her cookie and read her fortune. “ ‘You have many talents.' ”

“Like a banana,” Shaun said.

Irene smirked at him. “Read yours, Devon.”

“ ‘You will soon find happiness,' ” Devon read.

“Like a banana,” Shaun added. “That's way profound.” Haley thought she saw Devon blush. He looked down at the table so that he wouldn't have to catch anyone's eye. Darcy was staring right at him. She cracked open her cookie and read her fortune.

“ ‘Try to tame your restlessness,' ” she read. “Like a banana.”

“That doesn't really make sense,” Haley said.

“Sure it does,” Shaun said. “Bananas always makes sense.” He broke open another cookie. “ ‘You will have a comfortable old age' like a banana! See!”

“But bananas get brown and gooey after, like, a week,” Irene protested.

“Speaking of old age,” Shaun said. “Did you cats and kitties hear the latest freaky world news? Mr. Von, Acid Rick himself, is cohabitating with Dave Metzger's mommy dearest!”

“Are you kidding?” Haley said. Mr. Von was their eccentric art teacher, known for his rumpled clothes, permastubble beard and odd, whispery speaking voice. Dave Metzger, Annie Armstrong's boyfriend, was a basket case of allergies and nerves, most of which he'd inherited from his neurotic mother.

“I'm so not kidding,” Shaun said. “Did you catch the last episode of ‘Inside Hillsdale'? You could see Mr. Von and Dave's mom in the background for a second—holding hands! That's, like, evidence!”

“Who's Dave Metzger?” Darcy asked.

“He's the kid who does that video podcast, ‘Inside Hillsdale.' You know, the one ranting and raving about cafeteria portions and parking spaces.”

“He's a geek,” Irene added.

“So Dave is living in Von's house?” Devon asked.

“You heard it here first,” Shaun said. He belched for emphasis.

“What a freak show that must be,” Irene added.

“I can't imagine living with a teacher,” Haley said. “Or one of my parents dating one. Especially Mr. Von.”

“Dave has always been kind of batty,” Devon mused. “This could push him over the edge.”

“Kind of batty?” Shaun said, fluffing his blond mullet. “Next to him I'm the poster child for normal. Who knows, maybe he likes it at Von's. Seems like Madman Metzger's found the cuckoo's nest.”

“Do you think it's really true?” Irene said. “Maybe this is just one of those crazy rumors.”

“Babe, a story that weird has got to be true,” Shaun said.

Haley's just gotten a lot of new information to take in. Let's start with this girl Darcy Podowski. Where did she materialize from? Just how long—and how well—has she known Devon? All that talk about parking, ex-girlfriends and what kind of tattoo he should get could make a girl wonder.

Haley's always had a thing with Devon, a kind of mutual flirtation, but maybe she's been taking his interest for granted too long. If you think she should make an effort to head off Darcy and spend more time alone with Devon, have her
TAKE THE LEAD
.

Maybe Devon's not the one Haley should worry about. Dave Metzger's gotten himself into an odd situation, and he's not the best person to handle a sudden, difficult change. If you think Haley's dying to know whether Dave is really living in Mr. Von's spooky cottage these days, have her check it out on (
GARAGE BANDWIDTH
).

Then there's all that talk of tattoos. The art crowd certainly seems fascinated by them, but is Haley? If you think she should focus on less permanent accessories, go to (
FAMILY JEWELS
).

Sure, Haley wants to make her mark on the world But will it be with a tattoo needle?