What We Learned Along the Way (24 page)

As she drove, she prayed that she wouldn’t
run into the other woman at his house. It was too early for
scorned-woman drama.

Isaiah looked surprised, but happy to see
her. Malikah looked around the house, checking for signs of another
woman. She didn’t see any, so she took a seat on his sofa.

“So, what have you been up to?” she asked
calmly.

She had imagined their conversation going a
lot differently, but once she heard his voice and looked into those
eyes, she couldn’t say the things she had planned.

“You know me, just working… and thinking,” he
added.

“What have you been thinking about?”

“A lot of things. You mostly, though.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I’ve spent a lot of time in pointless
relationships. That’s time I can’t get back. When I met you and saw
how wonderfully perfect you were for me, I made a vow to make this
relationship count. Malikah, I love you, so much that I didn’t let
your mother stop me from pursuing you. I figured I’d give her some
time, let her get to know me and my intentions. You know, prove
myself, but the more I did to please her, the higher she built her
wall. That day you told me I couldn’t come to the reunion, I
realized something, just like I realized with my own mother. There
isn’t anything I can do to please her. She’ll either accept me or
she won’t, and she’s obviously made her decision. I’m not bending
over backwards anymore.”

“Oh okay, I get it. You’re not bending over
backwards for my horrible mother anymore, so is that why you’re
cheating on me?” she blurted out.

“Cheating on you? What are you talking
about?”

“Last week. I was upset about the family
reunion. I went to the mall to try and clear my head. I saw you in
the food court with some girl. Looked like you two were having a
great time,” she said softly. Speaking in a soft tone was the only
way she could keep herself from crying. “I know my mother is hard
to deal with, but you didn’t have to do that.”

“I didn’t cheat on you. There’s nothing your
mother could say that would make me do that. Yes, I was at the mall
that day. I had to take something back. That was my cousin you saw
me with. I hadn’t seen her in a while and we were catching up.
That’s all.”

“Oh,” Malikah said. She felt stupid. “Well,
where was your family? I thought they were supposed to be coming
into town.”

“They were, but I felt so bad that I called
them and cancelled. I was really looking forward to going to that
reunion and having our families meet each other. I had planned on
it being a special day, a really special day. I love you, but I
can’t deal with your mother,” he said has he walked into the
kitchen. Malikah followed.

“What does that mean? You’re breaking up with
me? I don’t see why my mother is that big of a deal. If we were to
get married, you’d be marrying me, not my mother. She can’t control
our relationship.”

“I wouldn’t be marrying your mother, but I
would be joining her family. And you’re right, she can’t control
our relationship, but she sure can influence it a whole lot. We’ve
already seen that.”

Isaiah started to say something else, but his
phone began to ring. He said it was a business call that he had to
take. He excused himself and went into the bedroom to take the
call.

While Isaiah was in the bedroom, Malikah went
to the bathroom. Just as she was washing her hands, she noticed a
long piece of paper sticking out of the trash can. It looked like
it had recently been placed there. She picked it up and saw that it
was a return receipt from Hanbrook’s Jeweler. Isaiah had bought and
returned a diamond engagement ring.

To be the mother of newborn twins, Jaime was
very thin. The babies were only four months old, but she had lost
all her baby weight plus a little extra. She hadn’t tried to, but
the depression she had fallen into after the confrontation at the
hospital kept her from eating. She was embarrassed that Mariam had
to find out the way she did. She was disgusted that Rashad had lied
to her about telling Mariam. She was burdened with guilt over the
thought that she might have brought an abrupt end to her friend’s
new marriage, and she was hurt that her parents still hadn’t taken
any interest in her life.

Joseph did what he could, but nothing seemed
to help. Now that they were married, he had moved Jaime and the
babies into a nice two-bedroom apartment in Dallas. He had interned
with a great company there a few years back, so all it took was a
few phone calls to get a job. He figured a new setting would help
Jaime move on and start anew. Because of the situation, they
decided against planning a traditional wedding. They couldn’t even
think of anyone that would be interested in coming. Instead, they
had a simple ceremony back in Houston at a small, far-off mosque
where no one knew them or their story.

“I brought home dinner. Would you like me to
bring you plate?” Joseph asked Jaime as she lay in the bed.

“No thanks. I’m not hungry,” she said in a
lifeless voice.

“Honey, you have to eat. I’m worried about
you. How do you expect to make enough milk for the babies?”

“The babies are fine. I’m fine. Everything is
fine,” she said as she pulled the covers up over her head.

Joseph heard crying coming from the babies’
room. He left to go check on them. Hayyat was still napping, but
Little Joseph was awake and looked pretty angry. Joseph was
starting to be able to distinguish between their different cries
and he could tell this was an “I’m hungry” cry. He was surprised at
how fast his fatherly instincts had kicked it. With Jaime being in
the condition that she was, he had ended up doing a lot more that
he originally planned. It was overwhelming at times, but he was
proud of himself for being able to handle it all.

He took Little Joseph into the bedroom to
nurse. As the baby nursed happily, Joseph tried again to talk to
his wife. “You can’t just stay in the bed forever. I know you’re
still pretty shaken up, but you’ve got to move on and think about
the family now.”

He wasn’t sure if he was over it himself. The
confrontation at the hospital was bad enough, but it was even worse
when Mariam showed up at her house later and literally tried to
choke her. She got in the door by convincing Jaime that she just
wanted to talk and get some things off her chest. She seemed
relatively calm, but once she started talking, she got more and
more upset. In a matter of seconds, Joseph was prying her fingers
from around Jaime’s neck. The worst part was that Jaime didn’t
really fight back. If Joseph hadn’t stopped her, she might have let
Mariam strangle the life out of her.

“Joseph, I don’t even know why you married
me. I’m a horrible person and I don’t deserve someone like you. I
don’t deserve anything. My parents were right to disown me. I’m a
shame, a disgrace to the whole world.”

“I married you because I wanted to spend the
rest of my life showing you how special you are to me. Yes, you
made a mistake, a pretty big one at that, but Allah is most
merciful. If he can forgive, then certainly we can. You think this
makes you a bad person? It doesn’t. It makes you a good person that
just made a bad decision. Bad people are the ones that do wrong and
have no remorse whatsoever. The fact that you care this much shows
how warm your heart is. That’s why I love you.”

He leaned over the bed and gave her a big
hug. His words did make her feel a bit better, but every time she
thought about what she had done to her best friend, that same sick
feeling came back. But she did know that laying in the bed forever
was unrealistic. She saw the way Joseph was playing mommy and daddy
to the kids, and that wasn’t fair to him. She couldn’t possibly
allow him to single-handedly raise two children that weren’t even
biologically his.

Jaime still felt horrible, but over the next
few days, she forced herself to at least get out of bed and start
doing some house work. Since she was too depressed to decorate, the
apartment was still pretty bare. It felt lonely and cold inside,
even when the temperature was warm.

While washing dishes one day, she was
surprised to get a phone call from Aliya.

“As salaam alaikum, stranger,” Aliya said
cheerfully.

“Wa alaikum salaam, Aliya, it’s so nice to
hear from you.” Jaime missed talking to her friends on the phone.
“I thought I’d never hear from any of you again.”

“It’s a pretty awkward situation to be in,
but you know I couldn’t just cut you off like that. I was just
checking on you to see how things are going in Dallas.”

“It’s nice. We’re in a pretty good
neighborhood and the people seem to be friendly.” Jaime hadn’t
taken the time to actually talk to any of her neighbors yet, but
they looked pretty nice in passing.

“How are those babies? Driving you crazy
yet?”

“They can be a handful at times, but Joseph
is amazing with them. I think they like him more than me. They only
want me when it’s time to eat. How are things with you?”

“They’re great. Still working at the school.
I’m actually going to start school myself next semester. I’ll be
studying business management.”

“That sounds nice.” Jaime said. She didn’t
think that business management sounded like a career path Aliya
would take, but Aliya had been changing a lot lately.

“Langston and I might be making a trip to
Dallas sometime soon. He’s thinking about opening a Chapter
there.”

“How nice. If you have time, give me a call
when you get here.”

“Definitely. Well, I was just checking on
you. Gotta run,” Aliya said before ending the conversation.

Jaime heard her prayer clock go off and went
to the bathroom to get washed up. She used to be sure to make all
five of her prayers, but she had really been slacking lately. She
knew that getting back on top of them was the first thing she
needed to do if she wanted to get over this depression.

After she prayed, she couldn’t believe she
had gone so long without doing it. It really did make her feel calm
and at ease. When she was younger, it was her constant prayer that
got her through everything, especially the insensitive kids at
school. It always made her feel good to know that at least five
times a day she got a chance to purify her soul. There was no
better therapy.

There was a mosque not too far away that she
had been planning on checking out. Joseph went for jummah every
Friday and seemed to like it. She knew she was hundreds of miles
away from home, but she still felt the need to hide her face from
everyone, especially other Muslims. She had to tell herself over
and over again that she was in a new town with new people. No one
here knows you. You can start fresh, she constantly reminded
herself.

It took a few more weeks, but she finally
made it to jummah one Friday afternoon. She dressed the twins in
cute matching outfits and sat as far in the back as she could. She
had planned on only observing and not talking to anyone, but the
sisters there were so happy to see a new face. After prayer, she
was swarmed by women that wanted to hold her babies and find out
all about her. They were nice, but seemed a little nosy. They gave
her a schedule of all the upcoming events and committees she could
join. Then they made their way outside to man the dinner table. One
sister stayed behind.

“Don’t mind them. They mean well, but
sometimes don’t know when to back off,” a short, brown-skinned lady
in a long skirt with her scarf wrapped beautifully in bun said. She
stuck out her hand to greet Jaime. “I’m Raina.”

“Nice to meet you, Raina. Everyone here is so
nice.”

“Yes, it’s a pretty warm community. I like it
here. Are you hungry? They’re selling dinners out front,” Raina
said.

Jaime smiled. No matter where she went,
Muslims were always selling dinners after jummah. Even though she
hadn’t seen the food yet, she already knew the menu. If it wasn’t
lamb and rice, surely, there had to be some baked chicken, green
beans, and mac and cheese. She could be sure of that.

When she got outside, she saw Joseph. He was
already feasting on his chicken dinner and he had a little brown
bag that she already knew contained bean pie. The predictability of
her nationwide community was both hilarious and comforting.

“What did you think of jummah?” he asked.

“It was nice. I think I could get used to
this place. The babies seemed to like it. They slept through the
whole thing.”

“I figured they were sleep, because it was
too quiet in there. Everyone would have known if they were awake,”
Joseph said.

Now that they were awake, the babies were
starting to get a little restless. Jaime knew she needed to get
them home. As they loaded the babies into the car, Jaime was
surprised to see she had a text message from Rashad:

Hey Jaime, hope all is well. Just
checking on the kids. Do you need anything?

“Oh, now he wants to check on them?” she
thought aloud. “You need to be checking on your wife, if you still
have one.” She tried not to let the text message get her in a bad
mood, but it did anyway. It didn’t take long for Joseph to
notice.

“What’s got you all in a funk?”

“You won’t believe who texted me today.
Rashad,” she blurted without giving him a chance to guess.

“What did he say?” Joseph was curious.

“He said he was checking on the kids to see
if they need anything. The nerve of him!” she said angrily.

“What did you say?”

“Nothing. I ignored him.”

“Why? You should have forwarded him our
shopping list. They need some more diapers, bottles, bibs,
t-shirts.” Joseph was prepared to go on with his list, but he could
Jaime was getting annoyed.

“I don’t want to have anything to do with
him. The babies are just fine without him.”