Whatever It Takes (9 page)

I opened my mouth to protest but then stopped.  Oh my God.  I can’t believe the thought never occurred to me until now.  I clapped my mouth shut and looked back and forth between my two friends as the realization of Diane’s words sunk in.  That was it.  It had to be.  I was never fully comfortable unless I was in command and that included when I was in bed with Gavin. 

“Fuck,” I cursed.  “Just when I think this shit is getting better...”

Yvonne moved in to finish my hair once again.  “Emma,” she said, “you’re fine.  Plenty of women have trouble getting off if they’re not on top.”

Diane nodded in agreement but I could tell they were just trying to be nice.  No matter how much I thought I was improving, especially with Gavin in my life, I was always going to be this girl with issues due to her fucked up parents.  My face fell a little but just then Yvonne announced that her masterpiece was complete and she pulled me up to face the mirror. 

I had to hand it to her, the girl knew hair.  She had blown out my long dark locks so that it was sleek and full of body, and then used the curling iron to put some waves through it.  She had combed out the curls with her fingers and they looked completely natural flowing around my head. That along with my carefully applied makeup, and I looked like a rock star.  Diane and I both complemented her skills.

The three of us moved into my bedroom then so I could change into my dress, a tight fitting blue number with frilly capped sleeves and flared out just above my knees.  It had a wide black belt just under the bust and I wore black heels that my toes peeped out of.  I checked myself at all angles in the mirror while Diane and Yvonne hooted and whistled at me.  The top of the dress had a v-neck cut and an ample amount of cleavage was visible.  I looked pretty damn sexy.

A knock at the front door pulled us from my room, wondering who it could be.  I had a few more minutes before Gavin was due to arrive and besides, he didn’t knock when he came to my apartment anymore.  We’d exchanged keys months ago.

I opened the door to find a delivery man on the other side.  He held a very large white box wrapped in a red satin ribbon.

“Emma Harrison?”

I nodded and smiled, wondering what in the world Gavin had done.

“Sign here,” the delivery man said handing me a pen and gesturing to a line on his clipboard.  I took my package, thanked him and brought the box in to set on the kitchen table where my two best friends were waiting.

“Aw,” Yvonne cooed, “maybe it’s a puppy!”

I laughed as I pulled the ribbon apart and lifted the lid.  Peeling back a few layers of tissue paper, I saw inside the box and smiled so brightly my cheeks instantly began to ache.  Tears welled in the corners of my eyes.

“Well?  What is it?” Diane demanded, leaning over to see into my gift.  “What the-”

There, in the center of the large white box, was a white fluffy towel, rolled and twisted into the shape of a heart.  Surrounding it were smaller towels in white and shades of pink, also twisted and folded, these in little shapes that resembled flowers and petals.  I lifted one from the box and held it to my nose, inhaling deeply as the velvety soft cotton brushed the skin of my face.

Gavin, on our first anniversary, hadn’t sent me a dozen roses.  He had sent me a “bouquet” of freshly laundered towels that smelled fresh and clean and reminded me of him. 

A single tear escaped and I dabbed it away quickly so that my makeup wasn’t ruined for the evening.

“Yeah, that’d be my reaction to a gift of bath towels from my boyfriend,” Yvonne criticized.  I looked at the oblivion on her face and shook my head smiling.

“No,” I started to explain, ”you don’t understand.”

But before I could, my front door opened and the man of my dreams stepped inside. 

He was dressed impeccably in a black suit, his shirt the color of raspberries with a solid black tie fitted around his neck in a perfect windsor knot.

Before he could close the door and greet us I was throwing myself into his arms.  He laughed and held me tightly to him.

“Hey, gorgeous,” he whispered in my ear.  “Happy anniversary.”

“You’re amazing,” I told him, squeezing just a little bit tighter and trying to keep more tears from falling.  

“You got the delivery then?” he asked.

I nodded against his chest, not even able to find the words to express what that box meant to me. It was an amazing feeling, just knowing that someone got you.

He pulled me gently away from him and held me at arm’s length to take a look at me.  Stepping back, he twirled his finger around in a silent command and I obeyed, spinning slowly on my heels so he could see me from every angle.

“You’re a goddess.”  He pulled me back to him and then kissed me sweetly while his hands gently cupped my face.  He always made sure to tell me that I looked nice, making an especially big deal whenever I was dressed up.  Honestly, could the man be a more perfect boyfriend?

“Sigh!” Yvonne called out from her seat still in the kitchen.  She and Diane had been watching Gavin and me put on quite a show for them and they were sitting there looking all ga-ga eyed over our exchange.

“Ladies,” Gavin greeted them, pulling me back into the kitchen so that he could give each of them a friendly kiss hello on the cheek.  Yvonne didn’t even try to hide her giddiness as his lips grazed her cheek and even Diane, who had a great guy in Mike, looked a little swoony.  I didn’t mind though.  The fact that Gavin was a gentleman to my best friends made me love him even more, if that was at all possible.

“So we are dying to know where you’re taking your lady tonight,” Diane said.  “Spill, Fitz.” 

Gavin smiled at her use of the nickname his buddies had christened him with in college.  He shook his head.

“My lips are sealed,” he told her.  “It’s going to remain a complete surprise until I get Emma there.”

I was anxious at not knowing, but in a good, anticipatory way.  I completely trusted Gavin and I knew he would never bring me somewhere I would be uncomfortable without talking to me about it first. 

With that, Gavin announced that we needed to leave and after making sure Diane would lock up my apartment with her key when they left, we headed towards the door.  Before we could make it out though, Yvonne grabbed my camera and insisted she take a photo of us. 

We posed for a quick picture in my living room and when we thought Yvonne was done we smiled at each other, ready to leave.  A few more clicks of the shutter followed us as we exited.

Gavin held my hand as he led me to his Mercedes and opened the door for me to get in first.  Total gentleman.

He started the car and after shifting into drive, he immediately clasped his hand over mine in my lap, rubbing small circles on the back of my hand with his thumb, as was customary now every time we drove in his car together.  I was completely at ease with Gavin’s driving by now but he always held my hand this way, more out of habit than comfort.  I liked it.  

We drove and on the way I kept pestering him about where we were going but he didn’t give anything away.  I was completely clueless until he pulled up to a valet in front of one of the most luxurious fine-dining establishments in the city.  I gasped and turned towards Gavin. 
La Uve,
a place made famous by it’s wine and steaks, was the place where the rich and famous flocked to if they happened to be in the area.  It was classy and over-the-top expensive.  I didn’t think you could even get a reservation here unless you had an agent or came from millions.

Gavin only smiled and quickly exited the car so that he could beat the valet to opening my door for me. 

He led me through huge solid oak doors and we were greeted by the maitre de in a small dark room that was softly glowing with the flickering of only candles .  Gavin gave his name and we were taken through another set of equally large oak doors into the main dining room where tables were filled with very glamorous looking patrons. I think I even saw a famous baseball player at one with a woman who had to be a model.  Instead of seating us at one of the tables though, we were continued to the back of the restaurant where we ascended a flight of stairs.

“Where are we going?” I whispered to Gavin.  Both of my hands were tightly grasping his as we made our way up.

“I reserved a private table,” he smiled to me.

We were brought to a booth that was semi-circular in shape made entirely of planks of wood except for the padding of the seats.  They were made of the softest leather one would expect to find in the most exoctic car.  I slid in and Gavin followed, sitting closely at my side.  Looking around I felt as though I could be sitting inside a large wine barrel.  We were hidden from the other diners, the view across from us a wall entirely made of glass so that we were looking out over the water.  It was extraordinary.

A waiter in a completely black tuxedo greeted us and placed water goblets with lemon slices floating in the top on our table.  Gavin studied the wine list and asked for a bottle of something that sounded horrendously expensive.

After the waiter left us I expressed my glee to Gavin.

“This is amazing,” I told him, “but way too much.  You are incredible, Gavin.”

He took my hand and kissed it.  “You’re incredible.  And nothing is too much if it’s for you.”

We studied the menu and I tried not to pay attention to the fact that the entrees didn’t even have prices listed under them.  We shared an appetiser of scallops that melted in my mouth and then both decided on the chateaubriand, the steak this place was most famous for.  We were able to cut them with a fork, they were that tender.

After our dinner we were served cognac and a chocolate creation that looked like it belonged in a museum for dessert.  Gavin raised his balloon snifter of amber liquid and turned to me.

“To Diane and Mike for bringing us together and to the best year of online chats, phone calls, dates, kisses, walks, talks, good music, clean smells, and great sex,” he toasted.

I smiled and clinked glasses with him and then he leaned in to kiss me.

“Happy anniversary, Emma.  I love you.”

“Happy anniversary, Gavin. I love you, too.”

His words warmed me and filled my heart with such joy but his last comment about the great sex brought me back to what Yvonne, Diane, and I discussed in my bathroom earlier.  Sex with Gavin was amazing but now I wondered if my little issue with being on top was something that bothered him.  Concern must have shown on my face because he asked me what was wrong.

“Nothing,” I assured him, smiling brightly.  “Nothing at all, this night is perfect.”

But Gavin knew me.  He didn’t say a word but narrowed his eyes and took my hand, his thumb moving circles.

I sighed, “Honestly, nothing is wrong.  I wanted to ask you something though.”  I wouldn’t be embarrassed talking to him about this.  Gavin was the one person I could open up to about anything, be it my childhood, which over the year he had learned the harsh details of, or having menstrual cramps.  He was that easy to talk to.

“When you said ‘great sex’ did you mean it?” I asked. 

His face was a twist of shock and horror.

“No! I mean,” I babbled on, “it’s amazing for me.  God, you know how much I love our sex life.  It’s fantastic, but I want to know if you feel the same way.”

“Of course, Emma,” he insisted.  “Where is this coming from?”

“Well, you’re just very generous in bed and you do all sorts of wonderful things but I know you’ve noticed that I have to be on top to... ya know...” 

Okay, this was semi-embarrassing.

“To come?” Gavin finished for me, his voice low and sexy.  God, him just saying that gave me goosebumps.

I nodded searching his face for any sign that he was about to admit that yes, he was disappointed.

“Emma, I love everything about you,” he assured me, pulling my hand to his lips once more,  “and that includes how you are when we’re in bed together.  In fact, I kind of like that you get off being on top.  Almost like you’re dominating me.”  He wiggled his eyebrows eliciting a giggle from me. 

“That’s reassuring,” I told him and took another sip of the smooth cognac.  “But it didn’t occur to me until tonight that it had to do with my little control issues and it sort of bothers me.”

“Why?”

I shrugged.  “I don’t know.  It’s just it’s gotten in the way of so many things in my life and now it’s affecting my sex life.  It just sucks.”

“Don’t look at it that way,”  Gavin said.  “For one, it isn’t affecting your sex life poorly, we still have amazing sex.  And two, what exactly has it gotten in the way of?  You’re a brilliant girl who is going to graduate college in a few months, you have a job you love, a lovely apartment, great friends, and a devilishly handsome man who loves you.”  He winked at that last part.  “I’d say you’re doing just fine, Emma.”

I nodded in agreement.  He was right and I loved that he was able to make me see things that way.

His eyes lit up for a moment and he put his arm around my shoulder, pulling my ear close to his lips.  He gave the skin just under my ear an open-mouthed kiss.  I tingled all over.

“Do you trust me?” he whispered.

I told him of course I did.