When Joss Met Matt (4 page)

I stood for a moment, unsure of where I wanted to settle. Finally I slid into my desk chair and picked at the clasp on my high heels. “My feet are killing me.”

“Yeah, but you look good,” Matt said.

I rolled my eyes with a smile.

“You don't have to sit over there,” he said. “I won't, like, assault you or anything.”

“I know.” I hesitated a moment, then stood and crossed to the bed. I sat beside Matt and let one foot slide over to rest against his. “Thanks for helping me get them home.”

“Sure.” He rubbed at his hairline where devil horns protruded. I could see the spirit gum was ready to give up its hold.

“Your horns are coming loose.”

He smirked. “Is that some kind of pick-up line?”

“Not on Halloween.” I smiled, flicking at his horns with one hand.

He reached up and set my halo bobbling. When he lowered his hand, he brushed it down my arm, reminding me of the time he'd almost kissed me outside the dorm.

“It's weird to be alone with a guy and not wonder if Ben is going to get jealous,” I said. Alcohol always brought out the spirit of confession in me.

“Kind of ironic that he's the one who cheated on you, don't you think?”

“Yeah, I guess it is.” I frowned down at a scab on my knee. I'd nicked myself shaving. “Asshat.”

Matt let out a surprised bark of laughter. “My great-grandmother was from Ireland, and when she really wanted to insult someone she called them a muppet.”

I squinted at him. “Did she mean, like …?” I made my hand into a poor imitation of a puppet in action.

“No, but when I was a kid, I thought she did, and it made me wonder what she had against Kermit.”

I laughed. “Then Ben's a muppet.”

“I take it you haven't found a conscious frat guy yet?” he asked.

“Shut up.” I shoved at him and he laughed. “I haven't. Not that it's any of your business.”

“So, you're still looking for a Sorbet Guy?”

My cheeks flushed and I looked away. “Yeah.”

He shifted to scratch at the peeling adhesive of his horns, and his fingers brushed my arm again on the way down, so I turned to look at him.

“It shouldn't be someone I know, should it? I mean, shouldn't it be …?”
What? A cheap one-night stand?

“I still say you run the risk of needing more Sorbet Sex if you go with a stranger. You don't know what you're going to get.”

“But if it's someone I know, there's bound to be weirdness between us afterward.” My heart downshifted and revved its engines.

He shrugged. “Maybe. But maybe not if he knows what you're after from the beginning.”

“And what would he get out of this arrangement?”

“A chance to sleep with a cute girl, no strings attached.”

“That sounds a little cheap.” My stomach got in on the act, stirring with guilt and nerves. I tried to settle it with nothing but will. After all, I hadn't done anything.

“I may be a nice guy, but I'm still a guy. Trust me, sex is its own reward.”

I laughed, looking up at his horns again before letting myself look into his eyes. He met my gaze without hesitation.

“So … are you volunteering?” I asked.

His eyebrows lifted. “I am merely discussing a hypothetical situation with you.”

My heart did a Tokyo drift maneuver into my throat, making it hard to swallow. Was I seriously considering this? Was he really offering, or was it truly a hypothetical situation? On the other hand, what did I have to lose? I could probably get back my original, wobbly lab stool from that guy if I wanted to. I licked my lips. “Are you sure it won't be weird?”

“It won't be weird. We need each other to pass chem.”

Relief quelled my stomach, but my pulse was happy to have a reason to stay in overdrive. “I thought you were merely discussing a hypothetical situation.”

“Oops.” He grinned. “Right.”

The date rape pamphlets didn't have any information about how to get a guy
into
your pants. Damn him and his keep-your-hands-where-I-can-see-'em nice guy ways. He was going to make me do all the hard work, wasn't he?

“Would … what …” I paused. It was harder than I thought.

He smiled and looked down at my hands.

“I don't know how …” I tried to catch my breath, suddenly absent, “… how to ask …”

“It's okay,” he said. “You don't have to.”

Chapter Six

Seven Years Earlier … First Semester Freshman Year

He rested his hand on my leg, tracing a circle around my kneecap with one finger. My skin was so cold from the walk home I could barely feel him touching me. The beer may have contributed to the numbness, for that matter. I concentrated on his hand until I could feel every cell that connected us. Nearly hypnotized, I raised my head and looked at him.

He leaned in and kissed me.

Matt was the third person I'd kissed since my sophomore year of high school. It felt strange, and so exciting. A shiver ran through my back, and a giggle escaped my throat.

“What's so funny?” he asked.

“I'm sorry. I'll stop.”

He kissed me again, and my mouth twitched toward another smile.

“What?” He pulled back.

“I don't know. I'm sorry.” I tried to sober my face, but the giggles bubbled up again.

“You're crazy,” Matt said with a slight smirk. I clapped a hand over my mouth, snickering. “You wanna stop?” he offered.

“No,” I said immediately.

“Then shut up,” he teased in a low voice, making the insult sound sexy.

I let myself smile through the next kiss, but I managed to keep the nervous laughter at bay.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yeah. Good.”

“Good.” He flashed a smile of his own at me, but it was brief. He had better things to do with his mouth.

We kissed for a long time, easing closer and closer. When Matt put his arms around me, he bumped into the wings of my costume. I pulled back and slid my arms out of the straps. Swinging the wings off, I smacked Matt in the head with one.

He flinched. “This must be why angels and devils don't mix.”

I laughed. “It's totally the wings,” I agreed.

He smiled and kissed me again. Without the wings in the way, he managed to pull the zipper on my dress down. I wanted to keep things fair, so I started in on his clothes. He winced when I pulled the devil horns off, but didn't stop me. Soon we were down to our underwear and I pulled away.

“Wait,” I gasped.

“Okay, okay.” Matt put his hands up like I was robbing him.

“No, that's not what I meant.” I smiled. “I'm cold.”

“Oh.” He looked lost.

“The blankets,” I supplied. The light dawned in his eyes and we stripped back the comforter. Under the sheets we resumed exploring each other's bodies. He was built like a soccer player with muscles long and hard, but not bulging like a weight lifter. I was amazed; to think he'd been hiding that body under his clothes all that time I'd sat beside him in lab. His skin smooth and warm—almost hot. If he'd been flushed, I'd have thought he had a fever. To my cold hands, he felt amazing. He was stronger than Ben; he almost took my breath away when he held me close to rearrange our position.

Matt kissed every part of my body that crossed his path: a shoulder, my chin, the palm of my hand. He was equal opportunity when it came to kissing. It was a new experience for me, and it turned me on like crazy.

Nervousness kept me pleasantly on edge. I wanted this—I wanted it more with every second. But, it was scary at the same time. I'd never been with anyone but Ben. I wondered if I was any good in bed. How could I know that with only one person to ask? A person who was obviously a lying jerk.

Never mind Ben, focus on Matt
.

That wasn't hard. He'd found his way into my panties and was doing his best to get every last drop of my attention. I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut. If I let him, he could put me over the edge in the space of two breaths.

“I want you.” I pulled at his hips, trying to strip off his boxer shorts. He did the job for me, tossing his boxers to the floor and reaching for me.

“Joss,” he whispered in my ear, “are you sure?”

I made an affirmative sound and dug my fingers into his back. Physically, I was two hundred percent sure. Mentally, I didn't think I'd ever be completely sure this was the right decision, though. But, I was sure enough.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes. Please, you're driving me crazy.” I reached for him, but he twisted away. “What's wrong?” I asked.

“Just a second,” he said, rummaging on the floor.

He returned with a condom and I kicked myself for considering going without. After putting it on, he looked at me. “Are you sure?” he repeated.

“Oh my God, stop asking! I'm sure.” He had to stop. I was as sure about such an obviously shaky plan as I was ever going to be. He laughed. When he kissed me, I let the last bit of doubt melt away. He was a damn good kisser. He was damn good at everything.

When it was over, Matt leaned on his forearms and propped his forehead against mine, breathing heavily into my face. I scrunched up my nose, knowing my breath probably wasn't any cooler or sweeter than his. After a moment, he seemed to have his wind back enough to lift his head.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yeah. You?”

He chuckled, the sound abbreviated by his panted breaths. “I'm exhausted,” he confessed. “I should get up.”

When he got out of bed, my skin stiffened with goose bumps. He'd left cold in his wake, cold that didn't stop at the surface. I gnawed on the inside of my cheek while I watched him move around the dim room, putting on boxer shorts and messing with some of his belongings on the floor. I figured he would get dressed and leave me alone for the rest of the night. A night which seemed very long and quiet to face alone. I'd known what was at risk by asking for a one-night stand—even if it was with a friend. But Matt returned to the bed and slid in with me. My heart rate slowed instantly. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my face all over.

“Are you okay?” he asked again.

I was, I realized on consideration. “Yeah,” I said. An itch in my nose made me think I might let my relief spill down my cheeks. I stifled the tears with a pinch.

“Do you feel better?” he asked. “Palate clear?”

“Yes.” It really was.

“Good.”

“Thank you,” I said into his chest.

“Thank
you
.”

“For what?” I asked, looking up.

“You don't seriously have to ask, do you?”

“That wasn't your first time, was it?” I hadn't considered the possibility before.

He laughed. “Uh, no, sorry.”

“No it's—I don't know, I figured I should ask.”

“No, that questionable honor went to a girl named Sarah a few years ago.”

“A few?”

“Don't make me do math, Joss, I'm too tired.”

I didn't answer, turning to fit our bodies together like spoons. Matt's arm rested along my thigh, hip to elbow. He squeezed my leg lightly and squirmed into a comfortable position.

“Good night.”

I woke up stiff and uncomfortable. Matt had sprawled onto his stomach, pushing me toward the wall. My right arm was pinned beneath me and my legs were cold from pressing against the cinder-block wall. I grunted and pushed back against Matt. He gasped into consciousness and rolled away from me, nearly falling off the bed. Tangled in the sheets as we were, he didn't fall, but we both slid closer to the edge.

“Matt, wake up!” I hissed.

“Oh shit,” he gasped. “Shit.”

“What's wrong?” I turned toward him. “Are you all right?”

He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Sorry.” He blinked at me like an owl. “Sorry. I was having this dream …”

“It's okay,” I repeated.

“Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you.”

“That's okay.” I pressed one hand to the side of his face, trying to center him. “What were you dreaming about?”

“I don't remember it all. Something about a cliff. God.”

“You almost fell out of bed,” I told him.

“Yeah.” He rubbed his eyes and blinked at me for a few more minutes. “We slept together last night.”

I couldn't help a small laugh. “Uh, yeah.”

“That's what I thought.”

“Thanks for remembering.”

“I didn't mean … I didn't forget,” he protested. “It just seemed kind of like a dream.”

“I'm not
that
good,” I said.

He considered me for a second. “There's no way I can answer that.”

“Sure, you just say, ‘yeah, you are.' ”

“Would you believe me?”

“No.”

“See?” He smiled and rolled over to kiss me. I cupped the back of his neck and held him there for a while, kissing him several more times.

He propped himself on his elbows, looking down at me. “My head is fucking pounding,” he said.

“Mine, too,” I agreed.

“You hungry?” he asked.

“A little.”

He curled onto his side, facing me, and touched the tip of his nose to my shoulder. “Let's get some breakfast.”

“Okay.”

Rolling out of bed, he poked around on the floor for his clothes. “Oh man, I am not doing the walk of shame in this,” he muttered, holding up his devil horns.

I laughed. “Can you hand me my robe?” I pointed toward the hook on the wall.

He looked at me, paused with one leg of his pants on. “No, I don't think so.”

“What?” I said.

“Just get dressed.”

“Not in front of you!” I protested.

“I am,” he reasoned.

“It's not the same,” I said.

“Yes, it is.”

“I take it all back. You are not nice.”

“Nice has nothing to do with it.”

“Matt!” I had to resort to whining. I didn't know what else to do.

“Oh, fine, but hurry up.” He tossed my robe at me and sat on Rachel's love seat to put on his shoes.

I managed to slither out of bed without revealing an inch of skin between my neck and my knees. Underwear and yoga pants were easy enough to put on, but I couldn't figure out how to get a shirt on without losing the robe first. I glanced over my shoulder and positioned myself at just the right angle to show Matt nothing but spine. In a swift move, I dropped the robe and ducked into the shirt. I turned to him and made a little ta-da gesture.

“I saw them last night, you know,” he advised.

“You were drunk.”

“Not
that
drunk.”

I crossed my arms over my chest, self-conscious.

“Come on.” He opened the door and gestured for me to go first. The hall was deserted. We walked together to the dining hall and found it nearly as empty.

“I guess we're up early,” I said.

Matt glanced at his watch. “Everyone else is late.”

I surveyed the hot food line, but my stomach turned at the thought of the cafeteria's eggs. I opted for cereal instead. I checked out before Matt and found a booth with a good view of the television in the corner.

Matt slid in across from me and tucked into a plateful of eggs covered in ketchup. I had to look away from his food to even get the first spoonful of cereal into my mouth.

“You okay?” he asked after glancing at me.

“Your food is making me ill.”

He nodded. “You're hungover.”

“No, it's the ketchup.”

“What's wrong with it?”

“Besides the fact that it's on your eggs?”

“I thought your rule was about blue food.”

“New rule: ketchup goes on burgers, fries, and hot dogs.” I ticked off the list on my fingers.

“You have a lot of rules.”

“Just about disgusting stuff.”

“Have you ever tried ketchup on eggs? It's good.”

“No, and no.”

He responded with the mature gesture of showing me a mouthful.

I squeezed my eyes shut and concentrated on swallowing.

“Wimp.” Matt laughed.

I kicked him under the table, and he responded in kind.

“Ouch!” I pulled my leg up and rubbed my shin. He grinned at me and I pulled the other leg up preventatively. “This is not very romantic, you know,” I said.

“Yeah?” His fork hovered in midair.

“Yeah! This is not exactly what a girl has in mind for breakfast the morning after …”

The forkful disappeared into his mouth and he shook his head. “Romance is overrated. Besides, it's different with Sorbet Sex,” he said.

“Oh, really?”

He nodded.

“And you're an expert?” I crossed my arms and leaned back in the booth.

“You'd never even heard of it before you met me.”

“So, picking on me is just part of the deal?”

“Part of the deal.”

“So, you get sex with no strings attached
and
you get to abuse me the next day?”

“I never said there were no strings attached.”

“You used those exact words.”

He narrowed his eyes in thought. “Never mind that.”

“Never mind?”

He stabbed another forkful of ketchuppy eggs and waved it at me. “New rule, okay?”

“There are rules?” My heart was beating hard, although I couldn't be sure if I was nervous about the future of my friendship with Matt, or if my stomach was giving me an early warning sign of an oncoming revolt.

“If you can have rules about food, I can have rules about sex.”

I couldn't resist a quick survey of the area to see if our conversation was drawing any attention. We were alone for a two-table radius in all directions.

“Fine. What's the rule?”

He laid his hand, palm up, on the table. “Now, we have to be friends.” I gave him a confused look, so he continued. “See, if we never have anything to do with each other after this, then this was just a one-night stand, and you might need to find someone else to sleep with to get rid of that.” I nodded, and he went on. “But, if we stay friends, then last night was just a good way to get your ex out of your system. Sorbet.”

“I see.” And I did. Matt made sense to me, in his own weird way.

I laid my hand in his. We had a deal.