Where Loyalty Lies (27 page)

“Yes,” I replied, gasping for air and hoping he wasn’t going to give me a stack of books to read on how to dodge a stick.

“What are you reading right now?”

“
Stardust
.”

“Who wrote that?”

“Neil Gai...” My response was cut short as I had to duck to avoid another swipe. I opened my mouth to complain about his unfair tactics but the look he was giving me made me hesitate. Then I understood.

“That was instinct,” Peter said. “Now what is this book about?”

I couldn’t help but grin as I marvelled at Peter’s idea. With my mind occupied on thinking about my book, I’d have no choice but to rely on instincts to avoid getting hit. It was very clever. Not that I would ever have told him that.

I could hear Saul and Thomas’ voices through my closed bedroom door. Henry had also been there earlier but had left about five minutes ago. I envied Henry for that.

At some point in the fifteen minutes that I’d been in the shower, all three vampires had arrived and had decided to sit in my living room and wait for me. It wasn’t Thomas that I was bothered about seeing, it was Saul. I’d thought he might have left shortly after Henry, but I was having no such luck. I pictured Saul on the other side of the door, sitting on the couch, wearing one of the dark shirts he always wore. More than anything I wanted to go and see him, and that was the exact reason I couldn’t. I was finding it harder and harder to keep myself from falling for him even more than I had.

After that day at the library, I’d done everything I could to keep away from him and, when I didn’t have any choice but to be in the same room as him, I’d made sure I was civil and nothing more. I could tell he was confused. Ever since the Autumn Ball, I’d lit up like a Christmas tree whenever I’d seen him. I’d wanted nothing more than for him to kiss me, and then the second he had, I’d frozen over and avoided him like the plague. He’d tried to speak to me countless times but, so far, I’d always managed to wriggle out of it. I now knew why he never failed to get what he wanted, he was relentless.  And, as he was on the other side of my door, there was no chance of me making a quick exit.

Giving up on waiting for him to leave, I grabbed my bikini and a towel and shoved them into a backpack. A glance out of my bedroom and bathroom windows told me that my best escape route was from the bathroom. I was four storeys up. I quickly mapped out a route in my head and then climbed over the window sill. I had no idea what the technical name was for the little ledge that ran around the building but I was certainly grateful to whoever had built it.

I edged along until I reached the gutter I’d planned to shimmy down. Shimmy had been a tad optimistic; I’m not sure there was a word that described my movements but it involved a lot of grunting and scraping of knuckles. When I’d finally made it to somewhere between the first and second storey, I stopped on another little ledge. The guttering sloped off at an angle so that I could no longer climb down it. I was just eyeing the ground below me and wondering if I could land without twisting anything, when a voice made me yelp and jump so hard I almost fell.

“I reckon your best bet is to keep going along to there and climb down that plant.” 

I followed the sound of the voice to find Henry propped up against a tree about thirty yards away. I swore under my breath, but shuffled along to the creeper he’d pointed out. Once again I demonstrated no grace as I descended, but eventually I got low enough that I could jump the last metre or so.

Henry came to stand beside me. I glanced up at him ready to defend my actions but he merely grinned at me.

“Don’t worry, I’m not here to bind and gag you and drag you back up, I just wanted to make sure you didn’t break your neck on the way down.”

“How did you know what I was going to do?”

“Maybe I just know you to well.”

I chewed my bottom lip. Henry hadn’t once asked about why I was avoiding Saul, even though it had become hugely obvious that that was exactly what I was doing. I wouldn’t have hesitated to talk to Henry about my feelings if it hadn’t been his brother that was the cause of my predicament. I could have really used his advice. There were only three people I felt I knew well enough to talk to, but I couldn’t talk to any of them about this. Henry was out because of his family ties, Dale was out because I already knew his view of Saul and I couldn’t ask Holt because I didn’t want to give him more to worry about.

I felt like I should at least give Henry a reason for my actions, but I was amazed that Saul hadn’t already discovered my clumsy exit so I gave Henry a quick hug of thanks and loped off around the building at a jog.

I couldn’t help feeling like I was trespassing as I stood at the edge of the swimming pool. After a day of combat training, my muscles were sore and aching but I took pride in that, knowing that I’d given my all. Peter was the only one of my examiners who seemed to have any respect for my efforts. That didn’t mean he cut me any slack, though, and halfway through my day I’d realised that a dip in the pool would be the perfect reward for my efforts.

As I looked around I was astounded by the beauty of the place. It was a true testament to how ill I’d been the other day when Dale had found me, that I hadn’t noticed anything of its splendour. 

The pool itself was enormous, plain and rectangular in shape but the bottom of it was decorated in blue mosaic tiles that formed the shape of an intricate star. Stretching above the pool, the ceiling was a huge expanse of stained glass that had dozens of stars on it, each star a little different to all the others.

Being about six in the evening, the sky outside was dark now and, not wanting to attract attention to myself, I didn’t turned the main lights on, only the lights that were under the surface of the water.

            For a while I stood and admired the tranquillity of the place but the call of the water soon became too strong and I took a run up and dived straight in at the deep end. I was no professional swimmer and my dive was probably terrible, but as my body sliced through the water it felt incredible. The cuts I’d just earned during my escape, stung as the water hit them but I didn’t care. It was a small price to pay for getting a Saul-free evening.  I paddled around for a bit, letting all the stress of my week’s tests fall away.

When I was truly relaxed, I floated on my back studying the stained glass above me. I took in every inch of it and then decided to study the mosaic beneath me. I took deep breaths and hovered along the bottom of the pool, studying the intricate pattern and tracing my fingers over the lines. As I got further into the deep end, I had to keep reminding myself to leave time to get back up to the surface for air. I left it way too long on the last attempt and was gasping for air as soon as I hit the surface. I trod water while my breathing returned to normal.

Just as I was about to lie back for some more mindless drifting, I noticed a figure standing at the side of the room, leaning up against the wall. The dim light meant all I could see was a black silhouette but somehow I knew who it was and my heart sped up in response.

“You know, lurking around in dark corners watching someone is usually considered stalking,” I snapped, mostly because I was embarrassed that he’d witnessed my rather unattractive gasping for air. Saul pushed off from the wall and came to stand by the pool’s edge where the lights underneath him lit him like a statue.

“Maybe if you weren’t so hell bent on not spending time with me, I wouldn’t have to resort to stalking.” His tone was light but I could tell he was upset that I’d taken such extreme measures to avoid him.

“Well, you’re persistent, I’ll give you that. Most people would give up trying to spend time with someone who climbs out of windows and scales down buildings just to get away.”

I swam towards Saul because he was standing at the shallow end and my energy was fast running out. Once the water was just below my shoulders I stopped and looked up at him.

This had been exactly the sort of situation I’d been trying to avoid. I hated these warring parts of me. There was no doubt that I felt more attracted to Saul than I ever had to anyone before. I’d spent a ridiculous amount of time imagining what it would be like to have his arms wrapped around me and his lips pressed against mine, but the logical part of me knew what vampires were like. Not only had I heard Monique’s words that day in the library but they’d rung true.

Growing up with the constant affections of men had made me regularly scrutinise my looks. I'd spent lengthy periods of time, especially when I was a teenager and Attraction had been at its strongest, standing in front of the mirror assessing my looks. I'd desperately tried to find whatever it was that made men look at me like they did, in hopes that I could change it and just go back to being unnoticed. But there had never been anything I could find, I really was just average so I knew that Saul’s reasons for wanting me were purely political. Of course the main reason to be attracted to somebody should be for their personality, rather than their looks but with the way I’d been acting, I knew there wasn’t a chance Saul was lured in by that either.

My thoughts led me into anger. Considering I wanted him so much I thought I was doing a damn good job of not caving into Saul but him showing up everywhere I was made it feel like a constant battle and one I wasn’t sure I would be able to keep up much longer. Five minutes ago I’d felt calmer and more relaxed than I had in ages and, now he was here, calmness had disappeared and I was left feeling a complete mess again.

“What are you doing here, Saul?” I snapped. “What do you want?”

“You know what I want. My feelings haven’t changed; I want you.” His eyes looked at me in a way that made me feel exposed.

“Well, my feelings haven’t changed either. The answer is still no.”

“I know your feelings haven’t changed, but that’s why it makes no sense that your answer’s no. I can feel from here how much you want me. I’ve made no secret of how I feel about you.  You enjoyed that kiss just as much as I did, so I don’t understand why you won’t let this happen.” His eyes stayed on mine as he spoke; his gaze was so intense that I almost fell for it.

“I have no interest in casual sex,” I said. It was mostly true. “I don’t do one night stands or fuck buddies; that’s why I’m saying no.” I stared back at him just so he’d understand I wasn’t playing games, even if he was.

“You think that’s all I want?” Saul said. I could see the muscles in his jaw ticking as he tensed and released his teeth. Then, before I knew it, he was walking into the pool without even removing his clothes. The water seemed to give no resistance as he moved effortlessly towards me. Before I could even contemplate moving away, Saul was grabbing my arms and pulling me up against him. With our faces just inches apart his eyes bored into mine.

“I care for you, Faine; I want more than a one night stand. I want to spend the days in your company and the nights with you in my arms. I just want the chance to make you happy.” Then he lowered his head so that his lips brushed against my ear as he spoke. “Now tell me that you don’t want the same?”

All I could think about was the feel of his breath on my neck and I was grateful that Saul was holding me above the water because my body was suddenly as weak as it had been the day Dale had found me in this same room.

“I... I...” I stammered but couldn’t seem to remember any words. My mouth was so dry that I licked my lips in the hope it would help me speak, but Saul’s eyes followed the movement with fascination. When he looked back up at me his pupils had dilated, leaving only a thin ring of the frosted mint green I loved so much around a bottomless black hole. The effect was an odd mix of exhilaration and terror. If this is what a turned-on vampire looked like then I could understand why the staff liked being in this situation.

“I can’t stop thinking about you, Faine and you can try to avoid me all you like, but I’m not going to give up on you.”

Not taking his eyes from mine, Saul moved his head even closer, pausing when his lips were almost touching mine. I stopped breathing. Then Saul seemed to lose control and his mouth was on mine. I closed my eyes and felt his energy, like an electric pulse, rushing through my body and reacting with my own. His tongue swept across my lips and I opened my mouth so that he could deepen the kiss, searching out my own tongue with his. I ran my fingers through Saul’s hair, marvelling at its softness.

Saul’s kisses moved to my neck; I moaned in pleasure as I wrapped my legs around his hips.

As soon as that girl stops playing coy and uncrosses her legs, things will go back to normal.

Monique’s words were so loud in my mind that, for a second, I thought she was in the room. I snapped out of my hazy trance and pushed myself away from Saul so fast that I caused a small whirlpool. What was I doing?

“Faine,” Saul said, reaching for me, but I avoided his grasp and heaved myself out of the pool. Saul did the same and followed me over to where I stood drying myself with a towel.

“No, don’t do this again, Faine. Talk to me,” Saul said, but I hardly heard him.

I was so angry with myself for getting into this situation again. It seemed I didn’t have anywhere near enough self control to stop myself from giving into him, so the only way to put an end to this was to stop Saul from trying. He’d just told me he wasn’t going to give up on me. As long as he thought he had a shot, he wasn’t going to back off so I had to make it clear that this was never going to happen. I took a deep breath. If I was going to pull this off, and I think my sanity depended on it, I had to make him want nothing more to do with me.