Where There is Evil (22 page)

Jim was back from his trip. To my surprise, he did not laugh when I told him that my cousins and I had decided to visit a medium. D had been at a meeting in Glasgow, and the
medium on the stage had mentioned her name because he had a ‘message’ for her. When she met him afterwards she was astonished when he told her to ignore her doctor who had diagnosed her
as having ME and to stick with the treatment she was receiving from her homeopath. She had arranged for him and the other five of us to come to her home. We decided beforehand to say nothing about
the situation we were in with the police and see if he picked up that we were related and deeply involved in the investigation. His name was William and he was younger than any of us, which meant
that the events of 1957 would be of little interest to him – if he even knew about them. For so far, all the media attention had focused on the Monklands and he was a Glaswegian. We planned
to record what he said.

D had asked us all to gather at seven or so when her husband would fetch William from the station. He would do six individual consultations in her spare bedroom. I was late and didn’t
arrive until after nine.

I am not sure what I expected William O’Connor to look like but he seemed innocuous, in jeans, a white T-shirt, and a casual jacket. He looked about thirty. As D changed the tape, she
said, ‘This is the last one, William. This is Sandra from Edinburgh.’ He gave me an appraising look. I took a seat nearby, and felt silly, as before he even started I had begun to panic
a little.

‘Now, just relax, all I’m going to do is speak to you and I want you to calm down,’ said William. ‘All right? All you have to do is answer yes or no. You’ve come a
distance to be here tonight.’

‘Edinburgh.’

‘And I feel it was a bit of a hassle during the day for you to get here.’

‘It certainly was.’

I reflected ruefully that he was quite right about that – because of a chain of disasters I had almost not come at all. William stared at me searchingly.

‘And also, as well as that, you have had an awful lot on your mind for the last couple of weeks or so.’

‘Months.’

‘It’s actually not sorted out yet at all. And it’s more on a personal level. You’ve had an awful lot of upset inside your own home. Are you OK?’

I nodded, though by now I’d dissolved.

‘What they’re telling me is,’ said William, slowly and carefully, ‘that you’ve had an
awful
lot to endure and nobody really knows the half of it yet. But
your grandmother has been around the home and she’s been giving you an awful lot of help and support.’

I was amazed at William’s ability to tune into my feelings. He had no knowledge that everything had been set in motion with Granny Jenny’s death a year before.

‘What she’s telling me here is that it’s your strength of character that’s keeping you going more than anything else. She’s telling me here that you’ve to try
not to worry so much because she’s trying to help you sort it out. Do you understand? And there’s someone round about you very stubborn – too stubborn, actually – it’s
like knocking on a brick wall and not getting through. It’s as if the conversation’s falling on deaf ears . . .

‘Don’t waste your energy any more.’ William looked at me sharply. ‘Let it materialize the way it’s to go, because your emotions have been
wrecked
and you
can’t allow them to do it any longer. You’ve put everybody before you, you know, and you’ve got to put
you
first now. And you’ve not got a lot of support about you
that you can run to . . . and you’re distanced away from your family as well. What they’re saying is – what the lady in the world of spirits is telling me is don’t worry too
much. Try not to blame yourself for everything, because you are not responsible.’

‘I’m not responsible.’ I repeated William’s words like a talisman.

‘D’you understand that? You are
not
to take the blame though there’s some who would like to pass it. They should be looking in,’ here William pointed to his
heart, ‘before they look out. Because their criticisms are just coming off their tongue like that, and the simple reason is, it’s easier to blame others rather than themselves.
I’ve got to be honest with you, they don’t seem to feel they
are
at fault. The lady’s saying that the most important thing here at the moment is you, right? Where is
there a child?’

I wondered if William was using telepathy. I’d thought of Moira, and he had mentioned a child. Wordlessly, I extracted from my bag a nameless head-and-shoulders photo of Moira.

I pushed the photo towards him.

‘This is the child,’ I said.

‘I know.’ William glanced at the photograph briefly. ‘All I keep getting is – I’m not getting a link on the other side . . . All I keep getting told is that
there’s a
lady
in the world of spirits who is trying to help.’

‘I’ve had nightmares for ages about this child,’ I interrupted him. There was a silence, then William regarded me with great compassion in his eyes. He concentrated hard, as if
listening to a conversation to which I was not attuned.

‘What I’m being told is . . . there’s somebody connected to that child – family? – who has taken her away.’

‘Yes.’

‘They actually lured her into a false sense of security – and then took her away, miles from where she lived. And also it is not totally sorted out yet.’

‘It’s not, no.’

‘Right. The child is now grown-up and doesn’t know the half of it.’

‘I was a child when this happened, and I don’t, but
this
child,’ I pointed to Moira’s picture, ‘is she on the other side? Can you say that?’

‘Yes, I’ve got to be honest. I’m sorry, I feel that.’

‘Yes, I think she is,’ I agreed sadly.

‘She’s there, yes. She
is
there.’

‘She’s not a member of my family, but I feel—’ I broke down at this point. ‘I feel my father’s responsible for this child not being here any more.’

William stared into the corner of the room, beyond me, but I could see nothing.

‘I feel that now this child could be late thirties or early forties, maybe forty-three? And not long after she disappeared, she went.’ He snapped his fingers quickly, and the sound
made me jump. ‘But you’ve had her several times in your material life back to you.’

My own eyes widened. There was only one thing he could be referring to.

‘She – I’ve been having nightmares about this wee girl,’ I croaked.

‘Because she’s visited you three times in dream form.’

‘Yes.’ The word was just a whisper. It can just be heard on the tape recording.

‘It’s to let you know—’

‘She’s told me the truth.’

‘That’s what’s breaking you apart. All I keep seeing is that she’s forgiven him.’

There was a silence.

‘But I can’t forgive him,’ I said.

‘That’s what I mean. What I’ve been told to tell you is that if it’s getting opened up, watch. Right? Because
you’ll
feel the pain.’

‘I’m feeling it now,’ I said, and it was true.

‘I feel as if you don’t know who to turn to, and all she’s saying is that she’s – calm down, calm down.’ William attempted to comfort me. Then he sat up, and
seemed to become another person altogether. ‘She was very chatty and very cheerful, and very, you know, as a child . . .’ William tossed his head as a young girl would, and his voice
altered to that of a child: ‘ “Yes, let’s go here.” She’s got a wee bit of properness in her voice. And she’s showing me a playground . . . where I’m near
. . . a playground.’

Where I’m near. It could only be Dunbeth Park, so close to her home.

‘A park with chutes?’ I asked William quietly. He was still being her, I could see.

‘Yes. I’m actually getting somebody playing with skipping ropes as well. There seem to be some trees, and a main road behind me – d’you understand? – and I seem to
have a blue-coloured dress on, some kind of blue colouring. I have to make sure I know that whom I’m giving this to, it’s correct – my guide tells me that it’s taken a lot
of strength and power to bring her here. But she
is
on the other side of life, she’s
not
here on the material. OK?’

‘I understand,’ I said. ‘I’ve known that, I think, for a year now.’

‘She’s passed away.’ William’s voice was his own now, which relieved me as the last few moments had been spooky, and the back of my neck was prickling. Moira had managed,
through this young man, to confirm for me the one memory I had of seeing her which I had written down so recently. ‘And I wouldn’t say it was natural causes. I have to be honest, I feel
the child has seen too much. She’s deluding, and she’s not showing me – but then again, sometimes there’s things I’m not allowed to see – but I feel
you
’ve seen some of it.’

William looked at me hard.

‘I’ve definitely seen some of it.’

‘I feel that you couldn’t believe it when you were seeing it. And it is not your imagination at all. Because,’ added William, snapping his fingers once more, ‘your life
just went like that, overnight. I feel that what I’ve been told to tell you is you’ve got to let things go the way they are just now. What I’m getting here is that the child
– she trusted the person that had taken her away.
She trusted the person
. All I’m getting is that she’s come to you – you must’ve been close at some point?
– and she’s only been able to contact you in the recent past . . .’

‘Very recently, only the last few weeks.’

‘Because the simple reason is, she didn’t want your material life disturbed earlier, because it would have damaged your life,’ William explained, ‘and, in spirit,
we’re not allowed to interfere in people’s lives until it comes to a stage where something must be done. That’s why the guides wouldn’t allow her to come to you before, but
she seems to be coming through now. You had to get on with your own life, and plus when your children were coming you would have been over-protective, and you would’ve gone over everything,
and you’d have been going out of your mind. But now they’re up, and they’ve got their independence.’

‘They have.’ I was staggered at how much William seemed to know about a woman he’d never encountered before, and when he only knew my first name. Certainly, you could tell from
the diamond ring and the wedding band on my left hand that I was married, but there were no clues to my children or their ages.

‘They’ve got independence,’ he repeated, ‘they’re finding their own level, and they’re going out into the world. So they’re now able to let the contact
come through.’

‘Contact come through?’

‘Don’t forget that she’s not a child any more. We’re looking at a grown woman, and you’ll probably see her in a grown form.’

‘No, I’ve actually seen her as she is here,’ I said, tapping on the photograph, ‘but in my dreams, she’s turned into my own wee girl.’

‘Is that right? That’s probably because of the innocence of it. Do you understand what I mean? Also, she could be trying to warn you as well.’

‘Warn me?’

‘Like, watch what you’re doing. Be careful with your emotions. Do you know what I mean? That type of situation. Also, she’s probably walked with your own wee girl in her life
– she’s been there to protect her and make sure nobody harmed her. But you haven’t seen her in a grown-up form, though you’ll probably be aware of her maturity at one point,
when she comes back to you. The dreams have stopped slightly – right? – just to ease your mind a bit. Because you’ve
got
to ease your mind at the moment or you’ll
go out of it. And I’ve to say this, she’s more worried about
you
than anything else and you’ve to try and accept that she
is
away.’

I noticed beads of sweat on William’s brow now. He looked exhausted. But there was one thing I felt I had to ask before the session stopped.

‘But, I’ve got to try and find out where he put this wee lassie. Her family never knew what happened to her.’

‘It seems to be near a quarry or where there’s a lot of land.’ William was tense, straining his ears. ‘But I’m being told by my guide that it will be almost
impossible to find the remains of that child, where her body is.’ Then he added, ‘They’ll probably reveal
something
to you. But it will be difficult to obtain it, because
there are a lot of changes in the area that it happened in. Sorry I couldn’t give you anything else,
but
this is what’s dominating your life. You would never have turned
against a man you felt respect and love for if you didn’t feel it was so important. But I feel as if your family probably won’t accept it.’

‘My mother won’t accept it.’

‘For anything,’ agreed William. ‘If anything, she probably thinks you’re going out of your mind, and she really won’t accept it – but she knows things about
your father that nobody knows. She will probably defend him—’

‘Right to the end!’ we said in unison.

William reassured me again that Moira’s spirit was fine and added that both her parents were now with her. I asked if he thought the body might have been dumped in water.

‘All I’m getting’s a quarry, so it could be water, I’m not sure. When you get sites like that, there’s usually water round about it. But I don’t see her being
flung in the sea.’

‘You know how you said she was taken away? I’m sure she was,’ I mused, ‘but I can’t see it being
far
.’

‘It’s not far but it’s definitely near a quarry,’ said William, getting up and heading for the door. ‘Now she didn’t tell me what happened. I’ll see
what I can do for you. Stay here and I’ll get you a glass of water.’ He was visibly shaken.

When C took him to the station, he told her not to take the car she was driving north next day. Then he said, ‘How close are you to that last girl I saw there?’

‘Actually, we’re all related,’ said C. ‘I’m her cousin. What is it?’

‘I couldn’t tell her that what we were getting . . . It was a murder. Tell her if she wants me to help the police I will. Good night. Don’t take this car on your
trip.’