Whisper on the Wind (33 page)

‘Fish and chips,’ Roz said as she screwed the vinegar-soaked newspaper into a tight ball and tossed it in the river, ‘have only one drawback. They smell. All fatty and fishy and vinegary, especially when you eat them with your fingers. Bet we smell so awful we won’t get any partners at all tonight. And where are your dancing shoes?’

‘In here.’ Kath held up a brown paper carrier-bag. ‘What time does it begin?’

‘At half-past seven, usually, though the men don’t start arriving till after eight. But we might as well make our way there and grab ourselves a couple of chairs. There isn’t a band, by the way, but they’ve managed to get hold of an electric gramophone and they play Victor Sylvester records. It’s quite good, really, for a shilling.’

The parish hall was at the end of Church Lane, beside the vicarage. It had once been the church school and, being stone built and sturdy, had survived with no ill-effects its conversion into a small kitchen, two cloakrooms and a fair-sized dance floor. Lavatories, still marked Boys and Girls, remained outside, at the far end of the schoolyard.

‘Over there.’ Roz pointed as they reached Church Lane. ‘Behind that clump of trees. You can’t see much of it because of the vicarage hedge. Marco’s camp, I’m talking about …’

‘Don’t know why people are upset by it. It’s well away from the village,’ Kath shrugged.

‘Yes, but it’s
there
, and some people don’t want it.’

‘Then we shouldn’t take prisoners, should we?’

‘You’ve got a point. Bet Marco would agree with you on that. Come on. You bought the chips – I’ll pay for the dance.’

The hand-printed notice said,
Entrance 1/0d. Servicemen & Women 6d.

‘If you must.’ Kath smiled. ‘And I’m – ssssh!’ Urgently she grasped Roz’s arm. ‘What was that? Sounded like –’

‘Kat! Over here!’

‘Marco!’ Roz gasped. ‘
Marco?
’

There was a movement in the tall, unclipped privets opposite the door, then they parted to show the prisoner of war, smiling gently, saying softly, ‘You are back, Kat.’

‘Marco, you fool, what in heaven’s name are you thinking about!’ Roz was the first to find her tongue. ‘You know you shouldn’t be here!’

‘
Si.
I know. But you told me Kat is too soon back and that you come here tonight –’

‘She’s right.’ Kath’s voice was low and anxious. ‘You’ll be in terrible trouble if anyone sees you.’

‘Yes, they’ll take away your yellow patches and make you stay in the camp, then there’ll be no more Home Farm,’ Roz urged. ‘How did you get past the guards?’

‘To get out is easy. I do it because I want to say hullo to Kat.’

‘Then you’d better say it, and be on your way. And you’d both best get yourselves out of sight. I’ll stay here, in case anyone comes.’ Roz herded them round the corner of the building. ‘Get round the back and be quick about it. And keep your voices down, for heaven’s sake!’

‘Marco,
why
?’ Kath whispered when they were alone. ‘Whatever possessed you to take such a risk? Couldn’t it have waited until tomorrow? Why the tearing need to see me?’

‘You know why.’ He stepped closer, taking her hand in his, lingering his lips on it as his eyes held hers. ‘A week without you is too long, Kat – and I was bored.’ He shrugged eloquently then dropped her hand abruptly. ‘I don’t like being shut in. I don’t like barbed wire and I don’t like yellow patches.’

‘I know, and I understand. But those patches mean you are a trusty. You couldn’t go out to work if you didn’t wear them.’ Yet oh, how she understood his loneliness, his need to be near someone, his need to touch, to love. ‘But if we’re caught we’ll both be in trouble.’ He mustn’t look at her like that; mustn’t try to kiss her. She wanted him to, but he mustn’t. ‘Go back. Please go, Marco.’

‘If you say you miss me.’

‘Of course I’ve missed you. I’ve missed you all – Roz and Jonty and Grace and – oh, just
go
!’

She took a backward step; a step away from a kiss that could be the start of something they couldn’t control. She was shaking as if she were cold, yet her cheeks burned and she fixed her gaze on her shoes, not trusting herself to look into his eyes.

‘Don’t worry. I go back, now.’ His fingertip found her chin and she pulled in her breath. ‘Kat?’

She looked up and he smiled gently, shaking his head. Then he laid his finger to his lips and kissing it, placed it on her own. ‘Goodnight, Katarina.’

He turned, then, and walked quickly away, parting the bushes in which he had hidden, leaving her alone and dismayed. She let go her breath in a sigh of relief and hurried to where Roz leaned on the wall, arms folded.

‘He’s gone, then? Got it all sorted, did you?’

‘There was nothing to sort, but oh, what a damn fool thing to do. What if someone had seen him – seen
us
? And how will he get back in?’

‘Same way as he got out, I suppose.’ Roz had had time to recover from her surprise; now she was enjoying Kath’s wide-eyed consternation. ‘And don’t look so worried – no one saw you. Did he kiss you again?’

‘No, he did
not
! And he didn’t really come to see me; he did it, I think, because he was bored. Just a lark, that’s all it was. So you can wipe that smirk off your face, Roz. Now!’

‘Yes, Miss. And, Kath – don’t take it so seriously. Like you just said, it was probably only a bit of bravado.’

‘Exactly.’ She shouldn’t be making such a fuss about it. ‘A bit of fun. Getting one over on the guards. And I’ll tell him when I see him tomorrow that he’d better not do anything so stupid again.’ Nor kiss her hand so exquisitely that a shock ran the length of her arm; nor ever again look at her as he’d done tonight, because she knew what a look like that said, and where it could lead. And wasn’t she to blame, really? Wasn’t it her own fault that she had allowed it to start, let alone get this far?

‘I’m sick of men, Roz. Sick of them all!’

They left the dance early. Roz missed Paul and every melody they had played tonight was one she had danced to with him – no other man but Paul must touch her, nor smile at her, nor hold her as he did.

‘Getting a bit crowded,’ she said. ‘Had enough, Kath?’

‘Yes. It’s been a long day, come to think of it.’ Her heart hadn’t been in it tonight. Her feet hadn’t kept time to the music, she’d been thinking so much about Marco and worrying in case he got caught. And she
shouldn’t
worry about him. Marco was her enemy; Barney’s enemy. Marco’s country had declared war on her country and tomorrow she must be cool and calm and off-hand so he wouldn’t know how attractive she found him. Because she did. She liked the tallness and the leanness of him, the way he smiled suddenly and threw back his head when he laughed. And worse than that, she liked the way he looked at her as if she were the most beautiful, the most desirable woman he’d ever known.

‘I’m a fool,’ she said as she shrugged into her jacket.

‘Why on earth am I worrying about Marco Roselli?’

‘I don’t know, lovey. Suppose
you
tell
me
?’

But for the life of her, Kath could not. Or dare not.

They pedalled slowly back to Alderby, wobbling and weaving from side to side of the road, knowing there would be little traffic to bother them – the rationing of petrol had seen to that.

Behind them, a big orange sun lay low in the sky, the night gone suddenly cold, reminding them that high summer was not yet here. And when it came, Roz considered, when days were hot and long, nights short and soft with half-light, how would it be? How would it feel to know that Paul had made it; that Skip and Sugar between them had touched down safely with that magical number reached?

Enjoy being home, Paul, but hurry back, my darling, because you’re only a day away and already I miss you so much that it’s like an ache inside me that won’t go away. Take care of your dear self
…

Kath drew the rose-chintz curtains then switched on the bedside light, looking about her with pleasure. In the soft shaded light, the room was even more beautiful. So understated the palest green walls, the white paintwork of windows and doors, the sheen of ages-old furniture. Roz was lucky; not in having all this, but in belonging to it, being a part of a family who had been here for hundreds of years. A Fairchild had felled his tallest oaks to help build Drake’s little ships and a Fairchild had fought for his king against Cromwell, Roz told her, that first time she came here. Lucky, she insisted, picking up her comb, searching for her little box of hairpins.

‘Can I come in?’ The door closed behind Roz. ‘What were you brooding into the mirror about?’

‘Not brooding. Thinking, perhaps …’

‘Tell me?’ Roz flopped on to the bed, drawing her legs beneath her. ‘Unless you’re too tired, that is.’

‘No.’ The tiredness had left her. Now her head was busy with thoughts that wouldn’t go away. Eyes wide, she spoke into the mirror. ‘I don’t want to go back there, Roz. When the war is over, I want us to live in Alderby and I want Barney to get a job round here. Does that sound selfish – or completely crazy?’

‘What brought all this on? Did something happen when you were home?’

‘Not
home.
Don’t call it that.’ It wouldn’t ever be home. ‘Nothing happened; nothing I could put a finger on. It’s just that Aunt Min won’t ever leave there so I suppose it’s best to accept it and try to find somewhere else.’

‘You and Barney?’

‘Of course me and Barney. Oh, I know things are in a bit of a mess between us and for the life of me I don’t know why. It’s partly my own fault, I’ll admit that much, for doing what I did. But Barney’s got to get over it. My joining the Land Army shouldn’t be the end of the world, like he’s trying to make out.

‘But it’s really because we can’t talk, you see. It’s the war to blame. Barney and I aren’t the only ones, either. There are plenty more like us who are going to have to get to know each other again. But we’ll be all right, I suppose. We’ll have to be. We’re married.’

‘Don’t say it like that, Kath. Don’t say
we’re married
as if it’s a prison sentence. Or is it? Are you thinking now that you might have made a mistake?’

‘No! Of course I –’ She stopped, shaking her head, swivelling round to face her friend. ‘I just don’t know, Roz. I honestly don’t know. There are such feelings inside me; feelings I should be ashamed of.’

‘Like what?’

‘Like me wondering what it would be like with someone else.’ There now, she’d said it.

‘With Marco?’

‘No, though I think Marco started it all off.’ She jumped to her feet, hugging herself tightly, pacing the floor. ‘What it would be like with
any
man. There was only ever Barney, you see. I wonder now if I’ve missed out on something. I wish we’d gone the whole way before we were married. I’d have known, then …’

‘Paul and I have gone the whole way a lot of times and I’m glad we have, because we’re so right together. When we’re married we’ll know it can only get better.’ She uncoiled her long, coltish legs and walked over to the dressing table. ‘Hand me the comb and pins. I’ll roll up your hair. And you aren’t keeping anything back, are you? Marco only kissed you? He didn’t try anything on?’

‘Of course he didn’t! He wouldn’t.’

‘He would, you know, if you wanted him to. Men know these things. A come-on is the same in any language. It doesn’t need words, Kath. I knew Paul was right for me the minute I saw him; before we even spoke or touched, I knew. He was standing there and I looked at him and he crossed the floor to me and that was it.’

‘So you think I’ve been giving Marco the eye, do you? Well, I haven’t – at least I don’t think I have. Oh, for Pete’s sake let’s talk about something else. D’you know, if there was someone on the other side of the wall with a glass to it, they’d think the pair of us were man mad.’

‘But I am. I’m mad about Paul. Crazy about the guy.’

‘Well,
I’m
not crazy about Marco.’

‘Nor Barney, either, it seems. You’ve got problems, Kath Allen. More pins,’ she demanded, holding out her hand. ‘But do you really want to live here – permanently, I mean, because I’d like it if you did. There are no cottages empty at the moment, though you could have one of mine like a shot if ever it came vacant.

‘In Grandpa’s time, I think we owned every house in Alderby, except the pub, but now they’ve mostly all been sold off. I think we only have half a dozen between us. Once, everyone who worked at Ridings had a house, if he was married. It came with the job, and when they retired, they went into one of the almshouses, or a gate lodge, or something smaller.

‘But those days ended when Grandpa was killed. We can’t afford servants, now. There’s only Polly and she’s more of a friend, really. Might be a good idea to keep an eye on the Manchester lady, though. She’ll be away as soon as the war’s over, I wouldn’t mind betting. And I’d forgotten – what I came in for was to ask if you’d like a glass of milk. Grace let me have an extra pint when she gave me the eggs, bless her. Fancy a glass?’

‘Please.’ Kath smiled. She felt more relaxed, now; better for letting it all out, and having Roz pin-curl her hair had helped soothe her. ‘And thanks for listening. Okay – I’ve got problems, but I’ll sort them; I really will.’

The war wouldn’t be over for ages; she didn’t have to be very bright to know that. Barney wouldn’t be home, just yet. There’d be time. She would work it all out. If Barney could only meet her half way, try to understand the way she felt. And if Marco were to go out of her life, perhaps? If they stopped letting prisoners work; if they sent him to another farm, wouldn’t that help?