Whispers of Love (25 page)

‘I see; and you have taken her mother's place, is that right?' he asked.

‘Yes, I've been living with Lewis and looking after Kay ever since Violet committed suicide.'

‘Suicide!' There was surprise in his voice. ‘That must have been very hard for a young girl to cope with.' He looked thoughtful before continuing. ‘I think you are quite right, you should wait until she comes home and then tell her. She will need you and, for that matter, I imagine you will need her.'

Christabel nodded. Making an effort she pulled herself together and held out her hand. ‘Thanks for listening and for your advice. I mustn't keep you any longer.'

‘Are you sure you are going to be able to manage on your own, Christabel? Here,' he pulled a card out of his pocket and handed it to her, ‘this is my home telephone number. If I'm not there I will be here at the hospital. Feel free to ring me at any time if you think I can help or if you want to talk. Promise!'

‘It's very kind of you, Dr . . . I mean Mark. I hope you don't do this much for all your patients, or your wife must get very fed up,' she said with a wan smile.

‘My wife died about four years ago,' he said quietly.

‘Oh, I am so sorry; your poor children. When
you were at Hilbury you told me that you had two boys, if I remember correctly.'

‘That's right and now they are grown-up men. One is a dentist and the younger one is still at university and hopes one day to be a doctor.'

Christabel travelled home in a daze. Despite the fact that it was a bitterly cold January day, as soon as she boarded the
Royal Daffodil
she went up to the top deck and walked around. The mist that had shrouded the Mersey earlier on had cleared and she hoped that the strong winter breeze would dispel the fog in her mind and help her to get to grips with what she ought to do for the best.

She wanted to be the one to break the news to Kay but, on reflection, she thought she owed it to Lilian to tell her what had happened first.

Lilian was almost hysterical when she heard the news and agreed immediately that it was Christabel's place to tell Kay.

‘I've decided that the best thing to do is to have Lewis cremated at Landican, so if you let me know when you can be in Liverpool, we can arrange a date for the funeral service,' Christabel told her. ‘Afterwards, I'll arrange for his ashes to be put into the family grave which is what mother would want.'

Lilian said she was too upset to think of anything like that but she agreed that Christabel must do whatever she thought was best.

‘I'll ask Alex to bring Kay home tomorrow,' she promised.

‘Won't she think it strange that you're cutting short her stay?' Christabel said worriedly.

‘I'll tell her that he has to come to Liverpool on business and that she can come again soon. Perhaps she could come back with us after the funeral; that might help to take her mind off matters.'

‘Perhaps. It depends, we'll have to wait and see.'

 

Christabel found it was very upsetting telling Kay what had happened.

‘We're both going to miss him so much,' she murmured as she hugged her close and tried to console her.

‘I've lost both my mum and my dad now, so I am an orphan with no one to love me,' Kay sobbed.

‘No, no that's not true, Kay; you'll always have me to love you,' Christabel assured her.

 

Christabel found she missed Lewis dreadfully. Without him to talk to and share things with there was a void in her life, but it didn't seem to be the same with Kay. Kay seemed to retreat into a shell, refusing to mention her father's name or talk about him in any way.

Ever since Lewis's funeral Christabel had been regretting that she'd agreed with Lilian that letting Kay spend some time in London
with them and being with Marlene would be a distraction for her. She'd thought Lilian had meant for a few days immediately following the funeral, not every weekend. It had started a routine Christabel didn't approve of and which she found difficult to stop.

It was as if the exciting social scene that Lilian and Alex enjoyed had given Kay a taste of the high life, and consequently she not only found it difficult to settle down again when she was at home during the week but she also didn't even seem to want to try.

The weekends became a constant battle; Christabel thought she ought to stay home at and study, but Kay wanted to go to London to spend time with Marlene.

‘We can't afford it these days, Kay, surely you can understand that,' Christabel would repeat time and time again. ‘I have to budget very carefully to manage on the money your father left.'

‘It doesn't cost me anything to stay at Aunt Lilian's,' Kay would argue, ‘and if Uncle Alex is too busy to come and collect me in his car then he always sends me the money for the train fare.'

‘I am aware of that and I don't like him doing it!'

‘Why ever not?' Kay's eyebrows shot up questioningly. ‘He's loaded! Marlene says it's his idea; no one asks him to do so.'

‘Apart from that side of things, going off to London so often is interfering with your studies.
You should be spending every minute you can revising.'

‘Aunt Chrissy, I keep telling you that swotting went out with the ark. You either know it, or you don't.'

‘In your case it will definitely be “not knowing” it and I'm not prepared to stand by and see that happen!' Christabel told her sharply.

‘I tell you what,' Kay said in a wheedling voice, knowing she was about to lose the argument, ‘if I stay home and study every weekend from now until half-term, then can I go up and stay with Marlene for the whole week?'

‘That will depend on how your Aunt Lilian feels about having you there for that long.'

It established a new pattern; one which Christabel still didn't like. Kay did stay at home most weekends, and she studied in between long phone calls with Marlene. At Easter she spent a full week with Marlene, and then persuaded Marlene to come back to Wallasey with her for a further three days, by which time the new term was about to start.

In the weeks leading up to Kay's exams, however, Christabel put her foot down. No trips to London, no telephone calls, and no visits from Marlene.

Kay gave in with a good grace and Christabel thought her problems were temporarily over. She concentrated on making sure that Kay had adequate sleep, a well-balanced diet, and spent every moment she possibly could studying.

Exams over, Christabel allowed Kay to relax. Marlene now had a part in her father's new film so she hadn't as much spare time as before, but Kay still spent a great many weekends in London.

When Kay's exam results came through at the end of August, they were better than Christabel had anticipated.

‘This confirms my opinion, Kay, that if you work hard you're quite capable of getting to university,' Christabel told her.

‘That means staying on for another two years at grammar school!' Kay groaned.

‘Well? You will still only be seventeen.'

‘And then you'll want me to spend a further three years studying at university to try and get a degree? By that time Marlene will have starred in at least four films!'

‘Possibly, but remember it will probably be the only job she can get without a proper education or any qualifications,' Christabel pointed out rather tartly.

‘Uncle Alex said he is going to do a commercial next, and that I can have a part in it.'

‘No!' The fury in Christabel's voice startled Kay. ‘Any nonsense of that sort and you won't be going up to London to see Marlene ever again.'

‘He only meant during the school holidays. He thought I'd like a chance to earn some pocket money. And I jolly well would!' Kay added rebelliously.

Christabel wondered if she should explain her reasons to Kay; tell her how Alex had tried to lure her into the glamorous world of films. Instead, she said, ‘If you've any energy to spare, then how about helping to redecorate your bedroom?'

Kay pulled a face. ‘What's the point? I only go in there to sleep. It's all right as it is.'

‘I thought you might like to get rid of some of the clutter, like the dolls and books that have been sitting on the shelves for years. Why not clear them out and smarten your room up?'

‘Yes, I would like to do that,' Kay agreed, ‘but I'd also like to go and stay with Marlene and since I did so well in my exams I thought that would be a nice reward.'

The argument went on for several days and eventually Christabel capitulated and agreed that Kay could spend a fortnight in London with Marlene before she returned to school for the start of the autumn term.

From then on, although she worked hard during term time, Kay spent more and more of her holiday breaks with Marlene in London. When she returned home she always looked worn out from all the excitement and late nights.

Christabel would try questioning her about what they did, and where they went, but she was not very forthcoming. Apart from paying for Kay to go out to theatres and dances, she suspected that Lilian and Alex were also buying
her clothes which she was keeping at their place in London. Kay didn't deny this, but she glossed over the details and admitted that she often borrowed things belonging to Marlene. There was such a difference in their ages that Christabel knew this couldn't possibly be true.

‘Look, Aunt Chrissy, I'm keeping to my part of the bargain. I don't go up there at weekends, I hardly ever talk to Marlene on the phone, and I'm working hard at school.'

Christabel had to admit this was true. Even so, she felt she was losing her and this was confirmed the following summer when Lilian came to stay for a few days and said they would be returning to America quite soon and would like to take Kay back there to live with them.

‘Oh, no!' Christabel tried hard to keep the despair out of her voice, even though the suggestion horrified her. If Kay was persuaded to go she knew there was nothing she could do about it, and she would be absolutely heart-broken.

‘We would see she completed her education when we got back to America and when she graduates Alex will make sure that she finds a really worthwhile job.'

‘Lilian, I've given up the last seven years of my life in order to look after Kay. Why should I hand her over to you now, and be left on my own?'

‘She won't stay with you for ever, you know!'

‘I'm aware of that. I wouldn't want her to,
but I'd like to finish what I started. We will know her exam results in August, and she will be off to university in September. After she graduates I know she will probably want to leave home and have her own life. When that time comes we can decide what to do, but until then her place is here with me. It's what Lewis would have wanted and it's what I want,' she added forcibly.

‘I always think it's tempting fate to make such set plans,' Lilian told her.

Christabel shrugged as she poured boiling water into the teapot. ‘I like an orderly life! Anyway, I would have thought you had enough problems of your own to worry about.'

‘Really? What's that supposed to mean?'

The two sisters stared at each other belligerently. Both were now in their thirties yet the animosity between them was as forceful as it had been when they were children.

Lilian had put on a great deal of weight, and since she had always been much shorter than Christabel she was now very plump. Her fair hair framed her round face like a frothy halo. She still chose pastel-pinks, and powder-blues, and was never without her big rings, lavish necklaces, and earrings.

Christabel was far more restrained. Her dark hair was neatly styled, and she favoured tailored clothes that suited her tall, slim figure.

‘I understand Marlene has a boyfriend?' Christabel commented as she passed her sister
a cup of tea. ‘Surely she's rather young for that sort of thing; she's only just fourteen.'

Lilian looked startled. ‘Who told you about her boyfriend?'

‘Oh, Kay let it slip.'

Lilian gave a forced laugh as she stirred her tea. ‘Only a passing phase. As I told you, we will be going back to America quite soon, so it's hardly likely that Marlene would become seriously involved with anyone over here.'

‘Well, whether she's serious about him or not, it's not a good example for Kay, but like mother like daughter, I suppose. You were always fickle when it came to boyfriends,' Christabel added dryly. ‘Anyway, I want Kay to stay away from her and from London for the next few weeks.'

‘And then?'

‘After her exams,' Christabel said reluctantly as she sipped her own tea, ‘she can come to you for a short holiday, if you like, before she starts at university.'

Kay resented being told she couldn't see Marlene until after her exams, and there was an uncomfortable atmosphere between her and Christabel for the next few weeks. The moment her exams were finished in July she packed a suitcase and went to London. She was still there when her examination results came through in late August.

Christabel phoned to tell her they had arrived.

‘You haven't opened them, have you, Aunt Chrissy?'

‘No, but I intend to do so if you aren't here by tomorrow morning!' Christabel told her. ‘If you had come home yesterday, like I asked you to do, you could have gone in to school and known the results a day earlier.'

‘Must I come back today? Can't the letter wait until the weekend?'

‘No, Kay, it certainly can't. I'm amazed you don't want to know the results. Are you sure you wouldn't like me to open the letter and read them to you over the phone?'

There was a long pause then, with obvious reluctance, Kay said, ‘All right then, Aunt Chrissy, perhaps you'd better do that, but only if it means I can stay here with Marlene for a few more days.'

The silence after Christabel had opened the letter lasted such a long time that Kay asked, ‘Are you still there?'