WHY ME? (2 page)

Thousand’s
of years ago, before Sir Isaac Newton’s  discovery of the
Third Law of Motion
-
‘FOR EVERY ACTION THERE IS AN OPPOSITE BUT EQUAL REACTION’
, the Hindus had
already formulated the law of cause and effect, which they called Karma.
According to Hindu belief, every action is the effect of our previous actions
and will be the cause of future actions. This cause and effect is not limited
to just this lifetime. Hindus also believe in the concept of reincarnation. They
feel that our present life is the effect of deeds carried out by us in our
previous lives and these along with the deeds carried out by us in our present
life will be the cause of our future lives. So, our karma dictates whether we
will be rich, poor, healthy, sickly, happy and sad and so forth in this life
and future lives. With each life, we either increase or decrease our karmic
burden.

Did karma play a role
in bringing Eve to cure me of my ED?

Had I done the correct
thing in having sex with Eve? What did I know about her?

This was the first time
I had unprotected sex. What if I got infected with a sexually transmitted
disease?

What if she became
pregnant?

Suddenly my cell phone rang.
Who could be phoning me at this hour? It was Eve. 

“Adam darling, have you
slept? I was thinking about you. I was getting the strange feeling that you would
be disturbed by today’s happenings.”

“Yes, Eve,” I replied
truthfully, “I’m still trying to figure out what happened today.”

“It was predestined,”
she replied. OMG! How the hell did she know that I had been thinking about
karma?

“I think you’re also
afraid of me getting pregnant or contracting some disease from me. Right?”

Was she a freaking mind
reader or witch?

I blurted, “Are you
reading my thoughts?”

“No, dear! I just
guessed,” she said soothingly, “Don’t you worry. If I get pregnant I’ll take
care of it. You will not contract any disease from me. I’m clean. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good night, Adam.” Her
melodious voice had a magical effect upon me. I was already thinking of my next
encounter with Eve.

Karma be damned!

I fell fast asleep.

‘Like attracts
like.’
It means that our thoughts, attitude, action
and expectations attract and create people, situations, and events which
conform to our positive or negative expectations. I feel my love for the occult
was the reason behind all the future occurrences in my life. What started it?

My dad loved comic
books.
He had a vast collection of these comics. I must
have read them, a zillion times, especially the occult series. These comics
helped me develop an interest in ritual magic and the occult sciences.

My favorite comics were about vampires. I was fascinated with the
vampire’s powers:
immortality, superhuman strength and
speed, ability to influence and hypnotize people and animals, the power to
transform into a bat / to disappear and reappear at will / to travel through
time. To me, they were the ultimate superheroes.

I
wanted to be like them. Never mind if I had to shun daylight and sleep in a
coffin. I wanted their powers! My friends thought I was crazy. I had stuck
posters of vampires on my bedroom walls and used to call out to them. Bite me
in the neck. Make me a vampire like you. Nothing happened then. Slowly, I lost
interest in these mythical creatures. I removed all the wall posters. My
interest in the occult, however, kept growing.

There
was a bookstore which sold old and rare books in my neighborhood. The owner’s name
was Jacob Rosenthal. He was a nice guy and very knowledgeable. I had visited
his shop on numerous occasions in the past and bought many books. He welcomed
me. Some book lovers were browsing the books.  His book shop was a favorite
haunt of book lovers from all over the place.

My
glance fell on a black colored book. I pulled it out of the shelf. It was about
evoking the dark powers with invocations in the Enochian language. The book was
an English transliteration of the Enochian language. [Enochian is a name given
to  an angelic language recorded in the private journals of an English mystic John
Dee and his colleague Edward Kelley in late 16th century England. According to
Dee's journals, Enochian was supposed to have been the language which God used
to create the world. Adam (the first) was also taught Enochian so that he could
speak with God and the angels. Modern occult researchers consider magical
rituals using the Enochian language as the most potent of all magical practices
and very few dare to use it fearing severe consequences.] I was naïve. I was
excited. Wow! I would be able to contact the demons and ask them to do my
bidding! I would be like King Solomon. I paid five bucks for the book. If Jacob
had not been pre-occupied with the other clients, he would have definitely
dissuaded me from buying this book.

I
took the book home and hid it in the cupboard. I was going to read it at night after
my parents were asleep. At around midnight, I ensured that my bedroom door was shut.
I switched on the bedside lamp. I started reading each and every evocation in
the book without understanding the meaning of a single word. I finished reading
the book within 15 minutes. I waited expectedly. Nothing happened. I kept the
book in the cupboard. I was disappointed. I switched off the lamp and went to
sleep.  I was soon fast asleep.

It
must have been around 2.00 am. I was suddenly awakened by an unbearable putrid
smell. My chest felt heavy. I was unable to breathe. It was as if a boulder had
been placed upon my chest. I was petrified. I saw, at first dimly, and then
clearly a huge foul shape over me. It had a huge toad like face and its body
was that of a gorilla. It was trying to crush me with its weight.  

Luckily,
I started chanting the various Hebrew names of God (JHVH, ADNI, AGLA, AHIH).
With great difficulty, I traced the banishing pentagram over the entity (for
more details on pentagrams, see APPENDIX). I called the divine forces for help.
I vowed to destroy the evil book if I was freed from this entity’s grip. I kept
on praying. It seemed like eternity! Suddenly the nameless creature disappeared.
I was freed. Everything became quiet. I fell asleep immediately with sheer
exhaustion.

Next
morning, Mom woke me. “What’s this strange smell, Adam?” she inquired, “What
did you eat last night? Your room smells like a cattle-shed.”

“No,
Mom. I don’t smell anything,” I lied. She was right. The room faintly smelt of ammonia.

“Okay,”
she said, “Have your breakfast. Take a bath. You’ll be late for school.”

After
school, I carried the book to a deserted play ground. I doused the book with the
gas I had brought along, and set it alight. I imagined hearing a loud wail
coming from the book as it burned. I shuddered with fright. I waited till the
book was completed reduced to ashes. I then used a stick to scatter the ashes.
I rushed home and took a cleansing bath using salt. I performed the Lesser
Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram (LBRP) every day for the next seven days.
This is a simple but very powerful technique to remove negativity afflicting a
person or surroundings. (please see APPENDIX for details of this method) It is
a powerful tool for self-development. I should have continued doing the LBRP. 
Perhaps my destiny (karma) would have changed.

I
learnt a valuable lesson. Never undertake any magical rituals alone. Always
conduct such operations with an expert to guide you. Such things are better off
left alone.

Was it because of this
episode, that I had to undergo the ‘Dark Night of the Soul’?

After the above
incident, a series of unfortunate events befell me. I slipped on the stairs and
suffered a severe leg sprain. I hobbled for days. I could not go the gym. Nothing
seemed to go right. A few days later, my dad suddenly suffered a cardiac arrest
and died in his office. He was a branch manager in the local bank. Everybody
was shocked. He never had any prior medical condition. Mom and I were
shattered. Now this ED problem which seemed incurable. I had become a monk. No
sex. Life sucked! What next? Eve had not happened.

I started reading about
fate, destiny, and karma, whatever. It was when I chanced upon the
Dark
Night of the Soul
doctrine. In the previous chapter, I have briefly
described the Law of Karma. Karma is closely connected with the concept of
reincarnation. All major religions believe in this concept in some form or the
other. It is believed, we are born on this earth to gain experiences, to
develop spiritually and to work out a small portion of the accumulated karmic
burden, of this life as well as our previous lives, during any one lifetime.
(Pretty heady stuff). However, if we start to tread the spiritual or magical
path (ritual magic) we can expect the full backlash of our karmic burden which
otherwise would have been distributed to our future lives. The net result is a
series of unexpected and terrible events in our present life. This is what is
known as the Dark Night of the Soul phase. This is a temporary but a terrible event
in a person’s life. The intensity and duration of this phase will vary from
person to person. Sometimes, a person dies if he is unable to weather this
storm in his life. If, however, we are able to last through this difficult
period then we will be richly rewarded.

I think I brought this
on myself with the demonic invocations. I should have meditated or practiced
the LBRP daily. This would have lessened the severity of my karmic burden. I
was lazy and ignorant.

What you sow you have
to reap!

I am not discouraging
anybody from treading the spiritual or magical path. Only remember to tackle
the Dark Night of the Soul phase fearlessly.

Back to the present. After
yesterday’s sexual encounter, I wanted to make love to Eve every day. I started
dropping by her place, whenever she was available. Eve would welcome me with
open arms. We would rush to the bedroom. Undress and start making torrid love.

We spoke very little
during our meetings. We would be so busy exploring each other’s bodies. We tried
all types of positions. The author of Kama Sutra would have been proud. After
sex, we would take a bath, get dressed and I would return to my apartment.
Strangely, Mom was silent about this. (I strongly believe that Eve had a hand
in this) After returning to my house, I would have dinner, wash the dishes and study
for some time before going to sleep.

The newspapers and TV
channels were full of the mysterious killings which seemed to occur almost on a
daily basis. Even though the killings supposedly took place after midnight, our
city became paralyzed after dark. The markets, bars, restaurants had a deserted
look at night. People stopped visiting movie theaters at night. The movie
business was affected. The city’s businesses suffered. Mom started visiting the
convenience store in the mornings. We stayed indoors at night.

All sorts of rumors
were spread around. There were varying reports of sightings of more than one
dark gown clad beings around the site where the killings had taken place. No
one had actually witnessed any killing.
Since the 9/11
incident, reinforcing the security infrastructure of public facilities,
creating more awareness of surroundings and improving communications had been the
focal point of the law enforcement agencies. More surveillance cameras had been
installed everywhere, especially around schools and public spaces.
None
of these cameras were able to capture any suspicious activity. It was as if
somebody had blanked out anything relating to these supernatural crimes. The
law enforcement authorities were still in the dark.

The Mayor had a trying
time explaining that the police had found some vital clues and arrests were
expected soon. The Police Chief was in a fix. The District Attorney wanted
quick results because it affected his political ambitions. The scared public was
screaming about police inefficiency. The police department was totally
demoralized. Even the FBI made no headway.  The President was also showing an
abnormal interest in this case. People from other states were also fearfully
awaiting the arrival of these supernatural killers in their hometowns.

The consulates of other
countries issued warnings to their countrymen not to visit our city. These
diplomatic offices had issued similar warnings a year back. A group of terrorists
had laid siege to the local supermarket and killed 50 helpless visitors and
staff. After a bloody battle, all the terrorists were shot dead. How they were
able to go past the elaborate security is still a mystery. It left an ugly scar
on the city. The attacks had attracted widespread global condemnation then. Now
this. What’s wrong with this city?

I was intrigued by
these vampire killers. Imagine, frightening the most powerful country in the
world. How I wish I could meet them!

I was disturbed by these
happenings.

Eve noticed this and
inquired, “Adam, what’s up?”

“I was wondering about
these vampire killers who are terrorizing our city.”

“They’re inter-dimensional
beings,” she answered abruptly.

Noticing the tone of
her voice, I asked, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I am one of them.”

I thought she was
joking and laughed out aloud. It was the first time that I saw Eve angry.
“Don’t laugh,” her voice was unusually harsh. For a moment, her beautiful face
looked like the grotesque witches I had seen in comic books. I shivered
uncontrollably. I felt an unknown dread.

What if she said was
true? OMG! I had been making love to a vampire. I closed my eyes in fright.
Would I be the next victim? Why me?

“Darling, open your
eyes.” Eve’s voice had turned melodious once more.

I opened my eyes. There
she was. My beautiful Eve. She smiled at me reassuringly and ran her fingers
through my hair. I was shit scared, but did not show my feelings. I loathed
this creature.

She continued, “We are
not true vampires. I’ll introduce you to my group and all your questions will
be answered.”

I wanted to say
something but my mind had gone blank. She snapped her fingers in front of my
eyes and I came out of my frozen state.

“Are you going to hurt
me?” I croaked.

“No, Adam, I’m not
going to hurt you. We have chosen you for a special purpose. I shall be gone
forever from your life very soon.”

I recovered my wits. I
wanted to know what I had got into. “Please tell me something about
yourselves.” I wanted to know the facts. I wanted to alert the world.

Eve seemed to read my
thoughts. She smiled at me knowingly.

“We shall meet with my
group tomorrow. Our leader is a being of great knowledge. You will be privy to
untold secrets. Prepare your questionnaire. And, hey, no electronic recording
of the interview. Bring paper and pencil. It will be the most momentous day of your
life.”

“You bet!” I mumbled.

I somehow dragged
myself to my house.